


Black Widow

by Sugachii (Sunflowersamurai)



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Porn, BDSM, Blood, Blood and Violence, Bondage, Bottom Chrollo, Captive, Dom/sub, Enemies to Lovers, Explicit Sexual Content, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Male Squirting, Pain, Porn With Plot, Post Orgasm Torture, Rough Sex, Smut, Sounding, Spy - Freeform, Top Kurapika, Torture, double agent, kurokura, phantom troupe, sadomachism, switch - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-07-10
Packaged: 2020-01-01 05:30:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 118,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18329582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunflowersamurai/pseuds/Sugachii
Summary: When Hisoka crosses Kurapika and betrays him to Chrollo Lucifer, the leader of the murderous band of thieves known as the Phantom Troupe, Chrollo proposes that simply killing Kurapika as revenge for their fallen comrade is too easy, and suggests they play a game instead.Whatever Chrollo says, he must do, and in exchange, Kurapika's dearest friends, Gon and Killua, get to live another day.And whoever breaks their promise, dies.





	1. Double Agent

**Author's Note:**

> All trigger and content warnings will be cited at the beginning of each chapter!  
> This fic is highly explicit and may contain triggering content!  
> Please be mindful of that before reading!

            Kurapika’s heart was racing, and his palms sweating so profusely that he nearly dropped his phone when it rang in his hands. He froze for a moment before answering it, “Is he coming?”

He could hear the distinct laugh on the other end of the line before the answer followed, “Oh, are you anxious, dear?”

Kurapika cringed, but didn’t answer the question, “Is he coming, Hisoka?”

Hisoka audibly hummed for a moment, “Don’t stress cutie, he’s already there. Ask for Crosson Saint, he made a reservation.”

 _Crosson Saint, what a weird alias to use,_ Kurapika mulled as he quickly hung up on Hisoka. He turned and entered the restaurant through the tall, adorned arch way. He approached the receptionist, still quivering with his nerves, “Hi, I’m here for a reservation made by Crosson Saint?”

The receptionist eyes lit up at once, “Ah yeah, hard to forget that name.”

Another receptionist added, “Or that face!”

She sifted through the sign in logs for a moment before directing Kurapika to the back left of the restaurant, second floor, by a large window. Kurapika headed up the stairs, looking around when he reached the top, but there were too many people to see clearly. He walked along the left wall of the building scanning the tables as he went. As he approached the back of the restaurant, he noticed a young man sitting alone, reading a book. Without looking up from the page, he flashed a peace sign as Kurapika walked up, “Magician’s friend?”

Kurapika shivered to be called Hisoka’s friend, but it confirmed that this was Crosson Saint. Kurapika sat down across from him, folding his napkin across his lap. When he looked up, he noticed Crosson watching him with a half-smile on his face, “What?”

He gave Kurapika an amicable smile, “Your manners are impeccable. I just felt I should tell you not to worry about appearances for my sake.”

Kurapika eyed him curiously for a while, “What are you reading?”

Crosson smiled at him again, “This? Light reading to kill some time. It’s a first edition copy of ‘The Hound of the Baskervilles’ by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle,” when Kurapika just nodded he added, “You know, Sherlock Holmes?”

Kurapika was still studying him closely, “Yeah, I’m familiar.”

Crosson furrowed his brows at the cold reply, “You’re not sure what you think of me?”

Kurapika met his gaze evenly, “Naturally. I’m sure you’ve been filled in on what we’re doing?”

Crosson’s smile faded, “Naturally.”

Kurapika shot him a look, “Then why aren’t you suspicious of me?”

Crosson hummed, flipping the page, “Now, don’t get ahead of yourself. I judge character in my own way.”

The waitress greeted them cheerily, derailing the conversation. She looked them over curiously, her eyes trailing especially long over Crosson, who gave her a charming smile in return as she took their order.

Kurapika huffed, “You flirt with everyone you meet?”

Crosson sucked the air between his teeth, “You’re a hostile one.”

Kurapika shifted his weight, “And you’re cheeky.”

The two shared silence for a while, Crosson flipping languidly through the pages of his book, his eyes trained intensely on the pages. Kurapika watched him for a long moment, waiting for Crosson to blink, but he didn’t. Finally, Kurapika sighed, “What’s the first step?”

Crosson tipped his head a bit, “Dinner. That’s first. I refuse to pay this much for a meal that’s not gonna be eaten.”

Kurapika sighed in frustration, but he conceded. He waited in false patience for the food to arrive, and ate tensely. He was put off by how pleased Crosson looked with his food, mostly because Kurapika was too nervous to enjoy any of it.

 

…

 

            When they’d finished their food, Crosson led him out of the restaurant and out to a striking black Mercedes. He held the door for Kurapika before getting in on his side. He tapped the center console, starting the car. It hummed beautifully, and Kurapika could feel the engine through his feet, and he knew it must be a powerful machine by the way it seemed to growl.

“You seem to have expensive taste,” Kurapika remarked as the car pulled out onto the street.

He hummed quietly for a moment, “Well, I make good enough money as a blacklist hunter, anyway.”

Kurapika looked over in surprise at him, “You’re a blacklist hunter?”

Crosson glanced at him, “Oh? Surprised? I specialize in undercover investigation. I caught up to Hisoka with ease which is when we got to talking about cooperation to find the Spiders. With Hisoka’s help, it was easy gathering the information on their hideout.”

Kurapika looked him over, “You don’t strike me as the type. And why are you helping me? It sounds like you got it all figured out already.”

Crosson tapped the wheel, “Well, I can’t tell you about Hisoka. He says he’s got his own reasons and I believe him. As for me, well,” he gave a look over at Kurapika, “I could really use an apprentice. And I’ve heard only amazing things about you, Kurapika. I’m a bit embarrassed to admit it, but I was hoping to pop the offer to you, once you saw what I’m capable of anyway.”

Kurapika thought about what he’d said, “A Hunter hiring a Hunter?”

Crosson nodded, “Happens all the time, kid. But I hear you’re special, so I wanted to jump on it before all the big employers try to drown you with their shit offers. Someone like you… Nah, you need something more. Something greater.”

Kurapika shivered at the depth in his words, “Are you… flirting with me?”

Crosson laughed, “Are you taking it that way?”

Kurapika gave him the cold shoulder, ignoring him. Crosson seemed unoffended and content to drive on in silence. Kurapika studied his profile, his hair stuck out in wispy tufts and fell into his face, just above and around his eyes. He had a headband like wrap around his forehead, and deep, emerald green earrings. He had full, dark eyelashes, his lower lashes particularly pronounced. And despite his hostile comments, Kurapika couldn’t help but think he was very handsome.

 

Kurapika sat quietly as he pulled up to a run-down part of town. A storm was beginning to break, Kurapika could hear the thunder rumbling in the distance, and rain drops began to fall one by one onto the windshield. He waited for Crosson before following him out into the rain. They trekked the long way around, Crosson moved purposefully, but with extreme caution. His eyes darted off in every direction, but he never stopped moving towards their destination.

They arrived before a condemned building that stood about 8 stories high. The top two stories were damaged and crumbling, but the over all integrity of the building looked solid. Crosson was surveying the area, he stood straight and rigid with his hands in his coat pockets, his eyes never leaving the bleak world of ruin around him.

When Crosson was satisfied, they headed up the building, carrying their equipment, and climbing over rubble as they went. When they reached the sixth floor, Crosson gestured towards a crumbling wall, “We should set up here. Higher than the other buildings and has a clear line of sight to the Spider’s base, but it’s far enough they won’t sense our presence if we use Zetsu. And there’s just enough roof left to keep us from getting soaked.”

Kurapika just nodded, and helped him set up their equipment. He noticed as he unpacked that they were carrying very few items, “Is this really enough?”

Crosson, didn’t look up to him, “Yeah. We’re Hunters, right? We have to travel light and rely on our instincts above all else.”

Kurapika just nodded understanding, and finished setting up with Crosson.

 

…

 

            They’d been sitting out for hours, lying with their backs to the walls, peering over the rubble wall. Ambient light had still been filtering through the clouds when they had arrived, but now the sky was black but for the occasional flash of sheet lightning.

Crosson leaned back away from the window, letting out a rather obnoxious half-moan, half-wail, as he did so, “What a drag!”

Kurapika had to admit he agreed, “Nobodies moved. Have they moved on?”

Crosson scoffed lightly, “You realize we’re talking about the Spider’s, right? I’m sure they’re masters of being covert,” he stretched himself out to full length with another groan, “I’m gonna go find a nice bush to piss in, I’ll be back in a moment.”

Kurapika waved him off and resumed his watch. Crosson hadn’t been gone too long when movement caught Kurapika’s eye. He snatched his binoculars and peered over the ledge towards the Spider’s base. His breath caught as he recognized the man sauntering casually from the base. It was Hisoka, he was looking down at his phone, dialing a number Kurapika guessed.

A moment later, Crosson’s phone rang from somewhere among his things. Kurapika rustled through Crosson’s bag while still watching Hisoka. He answered it, but before he could speak, his blood was turned to ice.

Hisoka’s voice rang out clearly on the other end, “Yo, Kurapika.”

Time seemed to freeze for Kurapika. Hisoka turned and looked directly at him, flashing him the same peace sign Crosson had at the restaurant.

 

And he realized all too late, he had been double-crossed.

 

He had only just dropped the phone when he felt the Benz knife cold against his throat. He felt Crosson’s body flesh against his, heat burning against him. A hand gripped his hair, yanking his head back so that he was looking into Crosson’s eyes. He was unnerved by the coldness in them, as if there was no soul, heart, or conscience within their depths.

The knife was pressed firmly into the soft flesh between his neck and his jaw; Kurapika could feel the blood running down his throat. He could feel Crosson’s hand ripping away at his hair, his eyes unblinking, “Hello, Chain Bastard. Do you know who I am?”

Kurapika could barely swallow against the knife and with his head held so far back, and answering him was even harder, “You’re- a Spider.”

Steely eyes glared down at him, “My name’s Chrollo Lucifer. I’m leader of the Spider.”

Kurapika could feel his knees trembling beneath him, threatening to drop his weight. It was a mix of rage and fear inside of him as Chrollo held their faces close together, looming over Kurapika, and making him painfully aware for the first time how much bigger Chrollo was than him.

Desperation fueled Kurapika, he flared his shoulder out, pushing the knife away while he turned and swung at Chrollo, but Chrollo grabbed his wrist with such force Kurapika swore he’d broken it by grip alone. Kurapika kicked out at him, but Chrollo twisted his arm behind his back, bringing it up and then down again with such violence that Kurapika cried out in pain as he heard it snap out of the socket. Chrollo yanked him back so that he was flush against his chest again, tucking the knife away and freeing his hand. He gripped Kurapika’s face with his free hand, forcing their eyes together again, “I would relax if I were you. Your arm is dislocated, and the poison in my knife is going to knock you out soon anyway. Unless you want your other arm the same way?”

Kurapika’s head spun with the pain, and the tranquilizer made him feel limp. Chrollo held his face, forcing him to look into the head Spider’s eyes until he was sure it was the last thing Kurapika saw before he went under.

 

…

 

            Kurapika came to slowly, he could hear before he could see, and he could see before he could move. Everything sounded far away, distorted as though he were sunk into a bath tub, listening to voices above the water. He could see, but everything was dark and tinted, and he couldn’t turn his head to look around.

Weight pressed into his back, and ice water was thrown over his face, brining him back some. He gasped beneath the knee in his back, coughing when he tried to breathe in. He was faintly aware that his arm had been placed again, and was no longer dangling limply.

“Are you awake now?” Kurapika could recognize Chrollo’s voice, but he struggled to answer him under the weight he was placing into his back.

Chrollo shifted off of him, enough for him to croak reply, “Yes.”

Chrollo stood up, using his foot to turn Kurapika onto his back, where he had to face the head Spider as he loomed over him, straddling him, “Good.”

Kurapika could hear the other voices jeering at him, but Chrollo stood absolutely still above him, his eyes never leaving Kurapika as he waited for him to come further to his senses. Once he seemed convinced Kurapika was aware of what was happening, Chrollo placed the sole of his boot over Kurapika’s throat, leaning his weight threateningly onto him.

Those cold, malevolent eyes bored into him, “Welcome back, Chain Bastard. I want you to listen to me, I’m only going to give you one chance to comply with me. The first thing you’re going to do is tell me what happened to Uvo.”

The weight crushing his throat lifted enough for him to speak, “I killed him.”

Chrollo stared back down at him, “How?”

Kurapika felt confused, “I just did.”

He could hear another man yell out, “Liar! Uvo would never let himself be killed by a weak ass like you!”

For the first time, Chrollo’s eyes left Kurapika long enough to shoot a look at the other man, “That’s enough,” his tone was calm, but assertive, “I want him to say it.”

His attention turned back to Kurapika, “How did you do it?”

Kurapika glared silently back up at him for a moment before Chrollo continued, “You should know, you can’t lie to me. So I want to hear you say it.”

Kurapika squirmed internally for a moment, “Just kill me.”

Chrollo reached down, grabbing Kurapika by his hair and pulling him to his feet, “You might want to reconsider.”

Chrollo gestured off to one side to someone Kurapika couldn’t see, but what he heard next made his heart twist in agony.

 

Ringing out loud and clear was Gon’s voice, “Kurapika!”

 

Kurapika lurched desperately in Chrollo’s grip, but Chrollo snaked his arm around Kurapika’s neck, releasing the grip in his hair and locking him in a chokehold. He stood up straight, forcing Kurapika onto the tips of his toes and pulling him close tight to his chest.  Kurapika could feel the brush of Chrollo’s lips against the back of his ear as he spoke, “Ah ah,” he chided him in a low but spiteful voice, “You just listen,” he squeezed tighter as his point was made.

Desperation drowned Kurapika, “Do not hurt them!” He put all the hatred in the world into the glare he gave Hisoka, who had both Gon and Killua with their arms twisted behind their backs.

Hisoka gave him a devious smile as pulled the two closer, “Oh? What do you say, boss?”

He held the last word, shooting a beyond flirtatious look to Chrollo, who returned it as cold as ever, “Just hold them.”

Hisoka winked at him, “Whatever you say.”

Kurapika stared desperately at the kids. Gon was glaring bravely at Chrollo, unblinking. But Killua was trembling, his eyes searching around desperately for a way out, though he was clearly gripped with despair.

Gon was still glaring at Chrollo, “Let him go!”

Killua shot him a horrified glare, “Stop it, Gon! You have no idea what we’re in right now…”

Kurapika could see the immense fear in Killua, and read his desire to run as far away as he could, but Hisoka held onto him too firmly. Gon struggled in his grip for a moment before looking back to Chrollo, “Why would you hurt Kurapika?”

Before Gon could get his answer, a short man wearing a mask stepped forward, silencing Gon with his hand.

Kurapika could feel Chrollo’s grip tighten, “That’s a brave kid. He wants to find his dad, right? The name was Ging Freecs, if I remember correctly? Wouldn’t it be a shame if he died before he could meet him?”

Kurapika felt every muscle in his body tense as Chrollo continued, “And young Killua, just wants to live a normal life and have fun?” Chrollo leaned in so close that his lips brushed Kurapika’s ear as he whispered to him, “I want you to listen very carefully to me, Kurapika. As far as I’m concerned, these two have nothing to do with the Spider. They’re only here because of you. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

Kurapika couldn’t help but tremble at how close he was, “I understand.”

Chrollo leaned away, “If you want them safely released, then you have to do it on my terms.”

Kurapika shivered, “Okay.”

Chrollo loosened his grip, “Good boy. Now listen, I want to make a deal with you. Agree, and I’ll let them go.”

Kurapika didn’t answer, just locked his eyes with Gon, sorrow overwhelming him as he had to admit to himself that Chrollo was right. He’d dragged them into this.

Chrollo must’ve taken his silence as agreement, because he continued, “I want you to use your judgement chain on both of us. And we’re gonna play a game. And I’ll let your friends go.”

Kurapika was shocked, _He knows about my judgement chain?_

Kurapika stared desperately at Gon and Killua, they were the only two who knew about it. Despair at the thought they’d betrayed him gripped him, but Chrollo interrupted, “Don’t worry, they didn’t say a word. They didn’t have a choice, so relax.”

Kurapika chose to believe that, “If I don’t agree, what will you do?”

Chrollo held no hesitation as he answered, “Me? Nothing. But I’ll hand them over to Feitan, and he won’t kill them. Not right away, that is. You see, Feitan is the Spider’s master torturer.”

Kurapika could feel the desire to resist draining from him, “I get it…”

Chrollo gestured to Hisoka, “All right, then. I want you to use your judgement chain on me, the condition will be that neither I nor any other Spider’s will harm Gon or Killua.”

Kurapika shifted, “That sounds far too good to be true.”

Chrollo never broke stride, “For them, it is. But you will also use your judgement chain on yourself. Your condition will be that you must abide by anything and everything I say, and if either of us breaks our promise, we die.”

It was all Kurapika could think about, that he’d gotten Killua and Gon involved with the Phantom Troupe. All he could see was the fear in Killua’s eyes, and hear the sound of Chrollo’s voice in his ear, knowing he was right.

Gon was staring desperately at him, “Kurapika… don’t.”

Kurapika could feel himself lean into Chrollo’s hold, resignation filling him, “It’s okay, Gon. I’ll be okay.”

Chrollo’s arms relaxed, and he gestured for Hisoka to release the kids, “Let them go. And Gon, Killua,”

Both of them froze where they stood, as Chrollo spoke, “If you step one foot back here to save him, or for any reason, the only thing you’ll find is his body.”

Kurapika couldn’t look at them, “Go. I’ll manage. You two need to go.”

He trembled as Chrollo placed his hand over his shoulder, aware that he was glaring at Gon and Killua from over his shoulder.

 

Killua grabbed Gon tightly, pulling him away, but giving Kurapika the most remorseful look he’d ever seen. And Kurapika swore that as he turned away from him, Killua mouthed the words, “I’m so sorry.”

 

But whatever comfort they might have held, it was gone the moment Gon and Killua vanished from his sight.

 

…

 

            Chrollo had spent a good deal of time getting the Troupe to back off of Kurapika, a few of them were out for his blood, but Chrollo assured them that his idea would be far more satisfying.

Now they stood facing one another, Kurapika resigned to his fate, and Chrollo showing no sign of any emotions. Chrollo waited in what seemed like patience while Kurapika mentally prepared himself for what he was about to do.

When he opened his eyes again, he faced Chrollo. He knew his eyes were blazing scarlet as he conjured the chains, “You promise me they’ll be safe?”

Chrollo met his gaze steadily, “You set the condition. You define my promise.”

Kurapika sighed, aiming the chains at his own chest, he drew a final deep breath, bracing himself before he shot them into his heart, setting his binding condition. He lurched with pain at the sensation, but he took it. He’d half expected Chrollo to back down once Kurapika’s promise was set, but Chrollo stood watching him, his arms at his sides, and his chest bared to him.

Kurapika took aim, speaking his condition aloud so that Chrollo wouldn’t think he was being tricked. He had to admit that it made him feel good to see that sharp look of pain on Chrollo’s face as the chain pierced his chest, wrapping around his heart in their binding contract.

 

And with that, their promises were set.

 

Depression deeper than he could describe gripped him as Chrollo led him to a room beneath ground level in the Spider’s hide out. Bloodlust like a river washed over him as he passed the Troupe members, following Chrollo. He was led into a small, candle lit room. There was a haphazard bed to one side. He was too drained to ask any questions, but Chrollo spoke to him unprompted, “I’ve been sleeping here, but it’s yours now. And your first task is to wait here until I return.”

Too exhausted to argue, Kurapika collapsed onto the blankets. He was aware of Chrollo lingering for a long moment before he turned away, closing the door behind him. Kurapika laid still for a while, before he rolled over, swiping his tongue over his fingers before extinguishing the candles Chrollo had apparently left lit.

He lay there, drowning in his own emptiness in the pitch-black room. He wasn’t sure how long had passed, or if he’d slept. He lost time as he lay there. But eventually, he heard footsteps approaching, and Chrollo returned.

Kurapika didn’t move. He could hear the nonchalant steps as Chrollo neared him, but he kept his eyes closed. The brush against him unnerved him as Chrollo sat with him. It made his skin crawl, and was enough to make him look up through the darkness at Chrollo, who answered his look, “You’re exhausted. Why don’t you get some rest? You’re going to need your strength.”

Their eyes met again in the dim light, but there was a new look in Chrollo’s this time. A look that made Kurapika feel cold.

 

A look that said, “I am the Spider, and I have **won.** ”


	2. Cheat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains blood, violence, and torture!

Kurapika must’ve fallen asleep, or if he was awake all night, he couldn’t remember anything. When morning came, Kurapika could barely see the light filtering through the cracks in the ceiling high above his head. He laid on his back, staring mindlessly at the rafters.

He could hear footsteps approaching some time hours later and guessed Chrollo was returning. He rolled onto his good arm, facing away from the door as it opened. The arm Chrollo had dislocated the day before had grown painfully stiff, and he had to tuck it against himself to be even remotely comfortable.

Chrollo sauntered over to where he was laying, crouching down next to him. Chrollo’s hand stroked his shoulder for a moment. Kurapika tensed, expecting it to hurt, but there was a surprising gentleness to the touch. His neck was too stiff to turn all the way to face Chrollo, but he managed to turn enough to see him.

Chrollo sat back when he did, “Are you ready to hear the conditions of my game?”

Kurapika just stared at him, already feeling defeated.

Chrollo shot him a mock smile, gently grabbing his arm, “Sit up.”

Kurapika moved slowly, both due to the pain in his arm and out of spite, but Chrollo didn’t rush him. He sat up, facing Chrollo, and waiting to hear what the rules of his contract were.

Chrollo reached into his coat pocket, pulling out a deck of playing cards as he did. He unfolded the top lid, dropping the deck into his palm. He swiped the two joker cards off the top of the deck, tossing them off to the side. He shuffled the cards in a fashion nearly as smooth as Hisoka’s. Clearly, he played and dealt often.

Chrollo continued shuffling the cards as he spoke to Kurapika, “Have you ever played a game called Cheat? It’s one where you need to get rid of all the cards in your hand. The trick to Cheat is that you can lie about what cards you’ve played. If you’re caught lying, usually you just pick up the cards in play.”

Kurapika looked up from Chrollo’s hands, “Usually?”

Chrollo smiled a bit, “What fun is a game without a bet? In this game, the loser will do whatever the winner asks. The only restriction is you can’t kill them, and you must be able to heal whatever damage is done by the end of it. This way, there’s something to look forward to if you win.”

Kurapika glared suspiciously at him, “If I win, you’ll really let me do anything at all to you?”

Chrollo mused, “Within those guidelines, yes. You’ve probably noticed already that I like games of the psychological kind. I think humans are incredibly fascinating creatures, and I’ll take any opportunity to indulge myself in playing with the human psyche.”

Kurapika scoffed at him, “No kidding. You’re a psychopath, you know that you bastard?”

Chrollo smiled and hummed at him, “Anyway, for this game, you can also lose if you’re caught lying. And if you make a false accusation, you also lose.”

Kurapika eyed him, “Sounds like you designed it to have a loser before the deck is played.”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s part of it. With only two people we either split the deck in half or take 26 cards each.”

Kurapika wasn’t convinced, “I think you like the idea of torturing someone with choice.”

Chrollo stopped shuffling the cards, “The paradox of choice.”

Kurapika sighed, “Yeah, something like that.”

Chrollo swiped the first card from the top of the deck, “So, if you understand, then let’s play.”

 

…

 

             They’d been playing for a while. At first it was easy, each of them having all of the cards they needed to play. As they played on though, Kurapika became more and more aware that he had large gaps in the cards he could play. Nervousness began to take hold, he was sweating, and his throat felt tight when he swallowed. He glanced up at Chrollo, but Chrollo just held his gaze as cool as ever, betraying nothing. Fear about what Chrollo would do to him if he lost became all he could think about.

Growing increasingly desperate, Kurapika knew he couldn’t wait until the final cards to bluff. If he did, Chrollo would definitely know he was lying as he likely held the remaining cards from the 5, 3, and 2 suits. Kurapika’s lowest remaining card was a 4. He realized then that he should’ve been lying the entire game, and felt certain Chrollo had been. If he’d done that, he could’ve saved the cards he needed for the final stretch, and it would’ve made it impossible for him to lose then. But he hadn’t been doing that, too afraid that Chrollo would catch him if he did.

Chrollo plucked a single card from his hand, “One 5.”

His eyes were fixed on Kurapika as he plucked the 4 of hearts, “One 4.”

Chrollo had no hesitation in his next move, “One 3.”

Kurapika knew he took too long picking a bluff card even before he laid it down, “One 2.”

Chrollo immediately answered, “Cheat.”

Kurapika shook as Chrollo flipped the top card, revealing the 8 of spades. He tapped his cards for a moment before speaking to Kurapika, “You lose. And by the way,” Chrollo flipped the card he’d placed before Kurapika’s, the 7 of clubs.

Kurapika trembled as Chrollo stacked the cards together in his hand, standing up after he had. He crossed the small gap between them, sitting behind Kurapika. Frightened, Kurapika tried to turn so that Chrollo wasn’t out of his sight, but Chrollo reached his hand around, grabbing Kurapika’s face and holding him so he couldn’t turn around.

Chrollo’s free hand squeezed Kurapika’s shoulder in an almost comforting gesture, “You should relax.”

Kurapika’s voice cracked when he answered, “You’re going to torture me.”

Chrollo patted him on the shoulder, “I never said that. The first thing I’m going to do is tell you to relax. And drink some water. The games no fun when it’s so obvious that you’re lying.”

Chrollo let him go and moved out from behind him as Kurapika spoke, “Are you serious?”

Chrollo nodded, walking towards the door, “Yes. We’ll call this a warm up.”

Chrollo left the room for a brief moment, returning with a glass of water that he handed to Kurapika. Holding the glass, Kurapika eyed Chrollo as he sat down across from him, refusing to drink. Chrollo looked amused, “It’s not poisoned.”

When Kurapika still didn’t drink, Chrollo took the glass from him, taking a deep drink himself and swallowing confidently. He handed the glass back to Kurapika, “Drink something. You’re dehydrated.”

Kurapika reluctantly brought the glass to his lips, drinking slowly despite how incredibly fresh the water tasted on his lips. Chrollo pulled a small book from his inner coat pocket while Kurapika finished the glass.

Kurapika studied the book in Chrollo’s hand, the cover was in a language he didn’t know, “Do you always read?”

Chrollo looked mildly surprised at the question, “Books were my first contact with the world.”

Kurapika thought it was a strange way of answering the question, almost like Chrollo had actually wanted to share something about himself, “What book is it?”

Grey eyes flickered up to him, “A classic. In Latin,” when Kurapika stared blankly at him he continued, “Aeneid, by Virgil. It’s an epic.”

Kurapika was surprised by that, “You speak Latin?”

Chrollo’s eyes stayed fixed on the book, “Well enough to read it.”

Kurapika sighed, purposefully drinking the water slowly. He knew once he was done, they would play a second round. Chrollo had left the cards stacked near him, and Kurapika despaired to think that next time he wouldn’t be so mild tempered.

Chrollo had been an enigma from the moment they had met. He was polite, intelligent, and charming. He had exploited Kurapika’s tunnel vision to distract him from his suspicions when they’d first met. He’d even seemed gentle and patient at times. But he had such a penchant for violence, too. Kurapika couldn’t forget the wicked look in his eyes when he’d dislocated his arm. Or the sadistic nature he’d shown in his willingness to harm Gon and Killua, just to make Kurapika suffer.

 

And he was the founder of the Spider, which meant he was the one who ordered the murder of the Kurta clan. Men, women, and children slaughtered in cold blood at his whim.

 

Now he sat quiet and still across from Kurapika, reading a famous epic in a language even Kurapika didn’t know. Looking down at his glass, Kurapika could see he wouldn’t be able to stall for much longer. He swirled it languidly for a while, thinking about what would come next when Chrollo interrupted his thoughts, “You can stall until I’m done with this verse. But that’s all.”

Kurapika sighed. He’d let himself think too much, and his frustration was building. He set the glass down and closed his eyes, waiting for Chrollo to finish.

Chrollo shut the book with a pronounced clap, “You ready?”

Kurapika nodded, “I guess.”

Chrollo handed him the deck, “You deal this time.”

Kurapika struggled to shuffle the cards, dropping them more than once. Chrollo made no comment, but he watched him with the sharpness of a hawk.

Kurapika dealt the cards, going over his strategies in his mind as he did. He had the Ace of spades, so he started.

And Kurapika realized as he shuffled through his hand, he held the whole suit of 4’s. And he’d started the game, which meant Chrollo had to place a bluff card on his second turn.

Kurapika waited for it, “Two 4’s”

“Cheat.”

Chrollo sighed, “Damn, you held the whole suit.”

But Kurapika trembled with the realization that he’d won, “You lost.”

Chrollo shot him a wary look, “That’s right.”

Kurapika got to his feet, feeling energy return to him as he stepped closer to Chrollo, who avoided his eyes. Chrollo’s hands stilled when Kurapika came to stand over him, “Your rules, do they still apply?”

Chrollo nodded, speaking quietly, “They do.”

Kurapika knew this was his chance, possibly the only one he would get. He was shaking with renewed hatred for Chrollo, and the gleam of wariness in Chrollo’s eyes when he looked up told him that his own eyes must be blazing.

Kurapika gripped Chrollo’s collar firmly, “If you can’t take what I do to you, then our deal is rescinded. Am I clear?”

Chrollo was silent for a long while, staring down at his hands before he eventually spoke, “You’re going to make this hell for me, aren’t you?”

Kurapika didn’t answer that question, “Stand up and go get some rope.”

Chrollo moved slowly, his eyes closed. But Kurapika’s rage was mounting. He had a chance not only to escape, but to get a taste of revenge on Chrollo as well.

Chrollo returned, looking unhappy, but to Kurapika’s frustration, not entirely worried either. He handed Kurapika the rope and stood waiting. Kurapika grasped his coat, roughly unclasping the buttons and tearing the coat off of him.

“You’re not going to fight me?” Kurapika yanked him closer, wrapping the rope around his throat.

Chrollo just closed his eyes as Kurapika cinched the knot in one of the ropes. Kurapika grabbed the hem of his shirt forcing it over his head and throwing it down over his coat on the floor. He grabbed and bound Chrollo’s wrists and tossed the ropes over one of the rafters. He pulled until Chrollo’s arms were extended above his head. He took the shorter rope fastened around Chrollo’s throat in his hand. He pulled the rope taut, bringing his face close to Chrollo’s.

They gave each other hard stares for a moment before Chrollo’s eyes suddenly lightened. Kurapika pulled harder on the rope until he could see it causing strain on Chrollo’s face. But to his frustration, Chrollo never stopped looking directly at him. The challenge in his eyes was clear.

Kurapika held fast on the rope, “Where’s your knife?”

Chrollo looked almost mockingly at him, “Sheathed on the inside of my right leg.”

Kurapika patted him down until he found the knife sheathed between Chrollo’s leg and his knee-high boots.

But even when Kurapika unsheathed it, Chrollo just gave him a pitying smile, “You’re not going to use it.”

Kurapika was growing increasingly angered by Chrollo’s taunts, “Shut up.”

Chrollo tipped his head in pseudo apology. He stayed quiet for a moment, but he had clearly detected Kurapika’s unravelling anger. And his next words would set Kurapika off.

 

“You know, it really is a beautiful hue of scarlet that you take when you’re emotionally high like this.”

 

Kurapika spared no words for him. With all the strength he could manage, he slammed his fist into Chrollo’s face. Chrollo looked dazed, but he didn’t look defeated in the slightest despite the blood that poured from the laceration left by Kurapika’s fist. Kurapika drew his hand back threateningly again, but Chrollo looked too dazed to taunt him again just yet.

 

Even without further provocation, Kurapika felt his grip slipping on himself. He circled around back of Chrollo. At first, he wanted to avoid looking Chrollo in the yes, but seeing the tattoo on his back set him off in a far worse manner than he had any hope to control.

Kurapika wanted nothing more than to destroy that symbol from his mind forever. Before he knew it, he had conjured his chains. But he altered them this time, not using their special properties, rather conjuring four uniform length chains with viscous toothed ends.

His bloodlust must have been pouring off of him, because Chrollo visibly tensed, and Kurapika could see the deliberate control of his breathing. He knew Chrollo was bracing himself.

His fury flowed strong as he drew his arm back, taking aim at the center of the tattoo that stretched across the length of Chrollo’s back. Focusing all his nen into the four chains, he swung as quickly and with as much force as he could.

 

The sound of agony from Chrollo delighted him.

 

Blood coursed in the path of his swing, deep wounds left in the trail. Kurapika could feel the way the fanged chains ripped through the skin of his exposed back. Chrollo kept his breathing steady, but Kurapika knew he had to get Chrollo to submit. Drawing his hand back once more, he swung again. And again.

 

And again.

 

Chrollo was soaked in a cold sweat, arms quivering in their bindings. Blood covered his back, running down his legs and pooling on the floor by his feet. And where the spider tattoo had been was now a deep, open wound.

Kurapika came around to face him, yanking the rope around his neck and wrapping it around his hand, “Do you submit?”

Chrollo’s eye had blackened, and the area around his left cheek and eye socket had swollen noticeably. But when he looked at Kurapika, he laughed, “Your idea of torture… is a joke.”

Both panic and anger fueled him. He absolutely had to make Chrollo submit, unless he wanted to be tortured far more severely now that he had definitely made an enemy out of Chrollo. His anger also drove him. He had never felt a hatred like this before, hot and intense.

He picked up the Benz knife, “Is it poisoned right now?”

Chrollo shook his head, “No.”

Kurapika pulled the rope until it choked Chrollo, “Then why don’t I castrate you with it? Is that a joke?”

Chrollo made a face that seemed to pity Kurapika, “You don’t have it in you.”

Kurapika released the rope, furiously unbuckling Chrollo’s belt before snapping of the buttons of his pants, “Do you want to test me?”

But Chrollo showed no fear, “You won’t do it.”

As much as Kurapika hated to admit it, Chrollo was right. He held the waistband of his pants, but it was as far as he could go. And he definitely couldn’t castrate him.

Something in his peripheral caught his eye. Kurapika looked over at one of the candles that was burning in the room. The dish beneath it filled with liquid wax.

 

With melted wax.

 

Chrollo followed Kurapika’s gaze, and this time he was quiet when Kurapika picked up the candle. He circled back behind Chrollo, and he could see the way the taut muscles of his back were trembling now. He held the candle close to Chrollo until he could see him squirm away from it.

“You won’t do it,” Chrollo’s voice was quiet and low.

Kurapika drew the dish over the top of Chrollo’s back, “Watch me.”

He tipped it until melted wax poured down over Chrollo’s shoulders and wounded back. Kurapika was encouraged by the pained cry he got from Chrollo as the wax burned his already raw skin. He continued until there was no wax left. Chrollo ground his teeth and cried out, but he refused to break and submit.

Kurapika rested his head against Chrollo’s back, just above the wound. The blowback from both his Scarlet Eyes and emotional stress was growing intense, and he could no longer see straight. Chrollo was in a cold sweat from the pain. His muscles trembled and his breathing was erratic and labored. But he showed no sign of being ready to submit.

 

And Kurapika couldn’t go on any longer.

 

“Do you admit defeat?”

Kurapika was on the verge of fainting as he rested against Chrollo’s back. But when he tried to stand on his own, the world spun around him. He kept one hand against Chrollo’s collar bones as he walked around to face him, “I do.”

He worked at untying Chrollo, aware he still needed to heal the wounds he’d inflicted. He instructed Chrollo to lay on his stomach on the bed while he conjured his Holy Chain. Using his nen and Scarlet Eyes, Kurapika healed the large wound on Chrollo’s back. It took the last of the strength within him to completely heal Chrollo. And when Chrollo stood up to redress himself, Kurapika couldn’t even hold his head up enough to look at him.

 

But he didn’t have to.

 

Chrollo kneeled in front of him, his hand around Kurapika’s throat as he lifted his face so their eyes could meet. He said nothing. No words were needed beyond the cold fury incased in his steel grey eyes. Kurapika couldn’t fight him. He couldn’t even get to his feet if his life depended on it right now. Chrollo released his throat long enough to land a powerful punch on Kurapika.

Kurapika was dazed, too exhausted to do anything but lay there as Chrollo straddled him, resting his weight high on Kurapika’s chest and making it hard to breathe.

His icy gaze bored into Kurapika as he spoke, “You should hope you don’t lose again. I’ll remember to pay you back in full for this, not for myself, but for Uvogin.”

 

Kurapika was terrified, but he could barely keep his eyes open, let alone get up. Chrollo stalked out of the room with his usual stride, closing the door behind him and leaving Kurapika to lie on the cold stone floor in darkness. Kurapika could feel the intense fever rising in him as the consequences of his Scarlet Eyes began to take hold.

All he knew was pain and fear and darkness as he gave way to unconsciousness. Somewhere in the back of his mind he felt hopeful that he wouldn’t wake up come morning.

 

But even as his mind slipped away from him, one thought remained. All he could think about were Chrollo’s words, _“Not for myself, but for Uvogin.”_


	3. 20 Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for; torture, underage drinking (mild), and mentions of acid

            Kurapika tossed about, his fever dreams tormenting him. He couldn’t shake the memories of the day at the park with Gon, Killua, and Leorio, and for the brief moments when Kurapika watched those two playing tag without a care in the world, he had felt such comfort. Now in his dreams, all he could see was how much danger he’d put them in. He was so uncomfortable as he lay there.

Chrollo sat with him, replacing the towel on his forehead periodically. Kurapika squirmed, unable to hold still, but too exhausted to really wake up. His body felt like it was melting, and his skin crawled. Chrollo would still him when he thrashed about, and when Kurapika started pulling at his shirt in desperation, Chrollo took it off for him.

Kurapika’s fever began to break the next day. When he’d first awakened, Chrollo was nowhere to be seen, but he returned not too long after. He had food and water which he set down next to Kurapika, “Are you feeling better?”

Kurapika still felt weak, but he was feeling clear-headed enough, “Why do you care?”

Chrollo gave him a cold look, “I don’t, really.”

Kurapika struggled to sit upright, “You just want a chance to screw with me again?”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s right.”

Kurapika sighed, “What are we doing this time?”

Chrollo looked over at him, “We’re gonna play 20 questions. If you lie or refuse to answer, you lose. And you can ask anything at all you want.”

He groaned internally at the thought, but he was still gripped by depression and too exhausted to resist.

Kurapika picked lazily at the food; he knew he was famished, but he had no appetite. He was silently grateful for the glass of water, though he would never thank Chrollo out loud for it. Kurapika took his time, but eventually, the food made him feel nauseous, so he shoved the plate off to one side. Giving Chrollo a long, empty stare, he waited for him to give the word for them to start playing the next twisted game. “Are the rules still the same for the loser?” Kurapika wasn’t sure he wanted to hear the answer. “Of course. I hope you’re ready,” the threat in his voice was thinly veiled. Kurapika watched, mildly confused as Chrollo left the room again. He felt his anxiety rising as he waited for Chrollo to return. When he did, he was carrying a liquor bottle with him. He poured a glass for Kurapika, keeping the rest of the bottle with himself.

“I can’t drink,” Kurapika stared down at the glass of what he guessed was champagne, “I’m only 20.”

Chrollo snorted in disbelief, “Is that what you’re concerned about?”

Kurapika had to admit he felt stupid being worried about it. Chrollo continued, “Just drink it. It’ll make answering questions easier later.”

Kurapika felt certain that was the last thing on Chrollo’s mind as he watched him knock back a huge gulp from the bottle, the muscles in his throat visible as he did so. Kurapika sipped tentatively at the glass as he watched him, “You drink a lot?” Chrollo sighed as he was apparently satisfied, “Myself? Not too often, no.”

Kurapika wasn’t sure he bought that after the way Chrollo had chugged half the remaining bottle in one go, but he let it go, too worried about losing again to care any longer.

He tried telling himself over again that all he had to do was answer questions, and that as long as he did that there was no way he could lose. Just 20 questions honestly, he could do that.

Chrollo sat across from him, his flushed cheeks highlighted by the candlelight. Kurapika had finished just over half his glass when Chrollo spoke to him again, “I’ll let you start.”

Kurapika definitely felt buzzed from the alcohol as he tried to think of what to ask. Chrollo was staring at something, looking almost vacant as he waited.

Eventually, Kurapika sighed, “Where were you born?”

Chrollo looked up at him, clearly feeling the alcohol he’d drunk earlier, “Meteor City. It’s not even a real city, just a massive dump site.” He sighed heavily after he’d answered. Kurapika didn’t know if it was because of the alcohol or if he didn’t want to talk about his birthplace as Chrollo continued, “What’s your earliest memory?”

Kurapika was surprised by the question. He wasn’t sure what he’d expected, but that wasn’t it. He thought for a while before answering, “I think… it was a memory of being up early one morning. I don’t think I was supposed to be able to get out of my room on my own, but I was sitting under a window and I remember looking out and seeing a hot air balloon.”

Kurapika was very aware of the purpose of the alcohol now, he was sharing far more than he cared to, but he couldn’t help it. Chrollo had just nodded along while Kurapika tried to think of what to say next. He had to ask a question that would help him figure Chrollo out, but he had no idea how to do that.

He couldn’t think of anything except something he’d read in a basic psychology book once, “What was your earliest childhood fear?”

Chrollo answered with immediate confidence, “The dark.”

Kurapika blinked in surprise, “The dark? Why?”

Chrollo mulled for a moment, “Psychologists say it’s a primal fear that we develop when we first develop an imagination. Our brain works with limited information from our senses, so our perceptual systems use imagination to fill in the blanks by utilizing an action-consequence grid to make a decision about what could be in the dark and what our best course of action would be. This results in anxiety and fear.”

Kurapika stared at him in surprise as he went on, “But for me, the dark meant that I couldn’t see the people who were trying to kill me. That’s scary to a kid.”

Kurapika shook his head, “Didn’t your parents or someone look after you?”

Chrollo shushed him with a wave, “It’s my turn to ask, but in short, no.”

Kurapika waited for his question as Chrollo thought, “What’s the most important thing in the world to you?”

Kurapika had to think. He knew if he lied that Chrollo could call him out, so he decided to answer truthfully, but carefully, “Revenge.”

Chrollo eyed him, “On me?”

Kurapika looked up at him, “On the Spider.”

Chrollo was clearly thinking, but his eyes betrayed nothing as Kurapika pondered the next question he should ask. Finally, he got an idea, “Why do you do what you do?”

Chrollo looked mildly surprised, “I really don’t know the answer to that.”

Kurapika gave him a hard look, “Give me your best guess then.”

Chrollo shrugged, “Maybe it’s because it’s all I’d ever known. Or maybe I do it just because I can. I don’t know the answer, really.”

Kurapika sighed, disappointed but believing Chrollo really didn’t know. He waited for his question, “What’s your biggest fear?”

Kurapika mulled on the question for a bit, “I guess it’s that I’ll become complacent, and lose all that hatred inside me.”

Chrollo hummed, “You sound incredibly self-destructive.”

Kurapika just stared at Chrollo’s shoes, “I guess so.”

Chrollo nodded, going on, “What do you think of me? Honest, brutal opinion.”

Kurapika felt hot at that question. Hot with the anger that still sat deep in his heart, “I hate you. I really, really hate you. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t feel it eating me alive from the inside out.” He could feel the strain in his eyes, but he was still too exhausted from the last time.

Chrollo seemed truly unmoved, “I figured as much.”

Kurapika was frustrated by his nonchalant response, but he let it go to ask his next question, “What about you? What do you think of me?”

Chrollo gave him a wicked look, “My answer isn’t much different. After what you did to Uvo, the desire to make you suffer burns me. Retribution. That’s the word for what I want.”

Kurapika shivered a little, Chrollo was good at keeping his temper, but the wickedness lighting his eyes was unmistakable. He would kill Kurapika on a whim.

It must have been the alcohol, because Kurapika commented aloud when he didn’t really mean to, “Before you embark on a journey for revenge, dig two graves.”

Chrollo mused, “If that’s true, it means we’ll probably end up killing each other. Literally and figuratively.”

Kurapika thought about what he’d said. It was true. He had been fighting his own conscience after what he’d done to Chrollo the day before. That wasn’t him. He wasn’t someone who enjoyed torturing another. And yet, he had such a burning desire in him to make Chrollo hurt. But when he had the opportunity to do it, he couldn’t carry it all the way. At night when he’d slept, everything he had done had come crashing over him, and he had never felt more empty inside. He had realized that he’d long lost himself to his hatred, and he thought he was willing to pay that price. But the image of Chrollo’s wounded and burned back haunted him. He had done that to another human being. And telling himself that Chrollo hardly qualified to be called a human didn’t help now that he had actually harmed him for the sole purpose of causing him pain. Truthfully, Kurapika couldn’t tell if his hatred was directed at Chrollo, or at himself.

Fingers snapped in front of his face, startling Kurapika. Chrollo was looking at him, “Still dealing with the aftermath of yesterday?”

Kurapika nodded, aware of how intense his exhaustion was. Chrollo went on now that Kurapika was paying attention again, “All right, I have a question for you.” The gleam in his eyes and the way he’d paused made Kurapika shiver, “What are the names and locations of your colleagues for the Nostrade family?”

Kurapika jerked awake at that, “What? Why do you want to know that?”

He already knew the answer, “So I can kill them. Why else?”

Kurapika didn’t know what to say, “I- I can’t answer that.”

Chrollo smiled slightly, his eyes narrowing, “Are you sure?”

Kurapika struggled for an answer, “I don’t know where they are.”

Chrollo saw right through him, “You’re lying.”

Kurapika looked at him desperately, the look in his eyes was the same one he’d held before. When Kurapika spoke, his voice was hardly more than a whisper, “I can’t answer that.”

Chrollo smiled now, “Suit yourself.”

He stood up until he towered over Kurapika, “Get up. I warned you not to lose, I haven’t cooled off enough yet.”

Kurapika swallowed hard as Chrollo roughly pulled the tie from around his waist. He nearly pulled Kurapika off his feet when he yanked his shirt off, leaving Kurapika standing there half naked in the cold room before he returned with his hands full of items. He picked up red silk rope and deftly tied it around Kurapika’s neck. Kurapika trembled, every instinct he had told him to fight Chrollo, but he knew he couldn’t. Chrollo took the time to bind his arms with an intricate pattern, tossing the free end over one of the rafters, and pulling until it was taut. Kurapika was nearly hanging from the rope, his feet only barely touching the ground. He fastened the end to the rope around Kurapika’s throat, “The more you struggle, the tighter the vise.”

Kurapika kept his jaw tense, bracing for what Chrollo would do to him. The other man threw some firewood into a pit, pouring the remaining alcohol on it. Kurapika felt faint when he realized the other object Chrollo had picked up was a branding iron. Chrollo twirled it for a moment before lighting the pit fire and placing the steel end of the iron into it.

Kurapika was on the verge of tears just thinking about it. Chrollo left the iron to heat, and picked up a cattle prod instead. He walked over to Kurapika, still standing taller than him, “I’m going to name some conditions. If you want me to stop, you have to submit to me. If you can’t take it, it counts as submission. And unless you take everything I give you, you lose.”

Kurapika had to fight back his tears, “What conditions?”

Chrollo cracked the cattle prod, “If you can’t take it, you’re going to give me information on your Nostrade comrades, as well as on Gon and Killua.” Kurapika’s heart lurched, “You can’t hurt them! It’s the deal!”

Chrollo stepped closer, until they were almost pressed together. He leaned in, stroking Kurapika’s hair and speaking directly into his ear, “Oh, I won’t. But what I will do is pass the information on to the mafia. And I’m sure they’d love to get their hands on the Zoldyck lad and the son of Ging Freecs. It’s a hefty bounty, if nothing else.”

Kurapika couldn’t hide his desperation, “Please… I’m begging you, don’t.”

Chrollo rubbed his thumb against the soft skin behind Kurapika’s ear, “Then you better be a lot tougher than you look.”

Chrollo twirled the electric prod before tapping it to Kurapika’s abdomen. He gasped at the sensation of the electricity. Chrollo took his time, circling Kurapika before stabbing the prod into his spine. He spasmed, pulling hard at his restraints. The vise around his throat tightened, making him gag. Chrollo wrapped his hand around Kurapika’s throat, holding him as he jabbed him repeatedly with the cattle prod.

Kurapika groaned in pain, all his muscles cramping from the electricity. But even so, Kurapika thought the pain was completely bearable. Chrollo took his hand and patted Kurapika’s cheek, “Good boy.”

Chrollo stepped back, setting the prod down and picking up the iron from the fire. Kurapika whimpered just seeing it.

Chrollo eyed him threateningly, “You wanna give up?”

Kurapika pulled away as he got closer, “Please don’t.”

Chrollo stepped behind him, reaching his arm around Kurapika’s waist. He ran his hand up Kurapika’s abdomen and chest, holding the hot iron close to his back as he did so. He could feel Chrollo’s breath against his skin, “Go on, just be a good boy and tell me.”

Kurapika’s breath caught as he trembled, “I- can’t. I can’t.”

Chrollo brought the iron so close it burned, “Last chance.”

Kurapika shut his eyes as tightly as he could, and held his breath. Chrollo tapped him quickly on his back, withdrawing quickly. Incredible pain seared Kurapika, and he couldn’t hold in his cries.

Chrollo came around in front of him, “Change your mind?”

Kurapika let out a pained whine, “No.”

Chrollo tapped the iron against Kurapika’s abdomen. Kurapika cried out, lurching in his restraints. He gasped desperately trying to catch his breath as Chrollo tapped him repeatedly.

 

…

 

Kurapika hung limply from the ropes. He was drenched in his own sweat, struggling to breathe through the pain. Chrollo trailed his fingers around Kurapika’s body, weaving between the burn marks. He lingered over Kurapika’s chest, “Oh, what a good boy.”

Kurapika let out a low moan, unable to speak. Chrollo stepped back, placing the now cool iron against the wall. Kurapika struggled to lift his head enough to watch what Chrollo was doing. He was holding a large glass jar of something.

He shot Kurapika the most wicked look yet, “Give me the information I want.”

Kurapika shook his head.

Chrollo swished the glass, “Kurapika… This is hydrochloric acid.”

Kurapika felt himself turn to ice, “God… no.”

Chrollo gave him a wicked smile, “Tell me. Now.”

Kurapika shook his head, feeling tears building up, “I won’t!”

His voice cracked with desperation and he could smell his own fear. Chrollo crossed the room towards Kurapika who thrashed desperately trying to get away. Chrollo unsealed the bottle, looking directly at Kurapika.

He paused for a moment, as though giving Kurapika one last chance to speak.

 

And when he refused, Chrollo drew his arm back and threw it.

 

Kurapika felt the warmth immediately. He didn’t even try to stifle his panicked screams. Horror overwhelmed him, and the pain in his chest made him think he was having a heart attack.

He drowned in fear, pulling so hard at his restraints that the vise cut his screams off.

 

When he’d struggled for a moment longer, Chrollo quickly set the glass down and came up to him. He clasped Kurapika’s face in his hands, stroking his thumbs over his cheeks for a moment. He loosened the vise, laughing softly as he did. He pulled Kurapika close, placing his thumb gently over his lips, “Shh… It’s okay. Just breathe. You’re fine.”

Kurapika was wrought with panic for a while longer, but Chrollo held him still in a half embrace. When Kurapika caught his breath, he realized the initial heat he’d felt was gone, and his skin wasn’t burning. Realization crashed over him more violently than any wave, and he finally broke and began to cry.

Chrollo still held him, speaking softly to him, “It’s just warm water.”

Kurapika sobbed violently as Chrollo worked to untie him. As soon as the restraints came free, Kurapika dropped to his knees at Chrollo’s feet. He was so distraught he could barely breathe. He’d never been so afraid before.

 

Chrollo crouched quietly next to him. He petted Kurapika gently, stroking him softly. Kurapika desperately sucked in air, “You win…”

Chrollo kept his hand on Kurapika’s head, “What?”

Kurapika shot his head up, glaring at Chrollo through his tears, “You win! You win okay? Just kill me and finish it!”

Chrollo looked a bit surprised, “Calm down.”

Kurapika slapped him, “Just kill me!”

Chrollo reeled with mild indignation, “Relax.”

He stooped down, pulling Kurapika off the ground. Kurapika was still distraught, but his strength drained from him. He was cold, and his whole body felt weak. The burns hurt, and he could feel the strain in his eyes from his outburst. He had been utterly defeated, and he leaned into Chrollo’s chest. To his surprise, Chrollo wrapped his arm around him and held him. Kurapika let out a shuddering sigh, closing his eyes and allowing himself to calm down.

Chrollo coaxed him to his feet and laid him down on the bed. He conjured his Skill Hunter book and flipped through the pages until he found a sufficient healing nen.

He ran his hands delicately across Kurapika’s body. Kurapika could feel his nen, and the total lack of hostility in it. It was a soothing warmth on his body, and he felt himself relaxing under Chrollo’s touch. Comfort and exhaustion filled him, and he closed his eyes.

 

He drifted for a while, and when he opened his eyes again, Chrollo had finished healing him. He was sitting quietly, pressed against Kurapika and, as usual, reading.

He glanced down when Kurapika stirred, “Feeling better?”

Kurapika glared at him, “The fuck is wrong with you?”

Chrollo made a face, “Huh?”

Kurapika kicked him weakly, “You were gonna throw **acid** on me!”

Chrollo looked indignant, “I was not. It was just tap water!”

Kurapika shoved his foot into Chrollo’s indignant face, “And you told me it was acid! Go to hell!”

Chrollo smacked his foot away, “Maybe it was a bit much.”

Kurapika glared at him, “You think?”

Chrollo shrugged, “I could’ve thrown actual acid on you.”

Kurapika tisked at him, “That does not even begin to make it okay. You’re insane.”

Chrollo went back to his reading, completely monotone, “Yeah, probably.”

Kurapika let out an angry sigh, tossing onto his side and pulling the blanket over his face. He laid there for a long time.

 

When he finally popped his head back out, it was because Chrollo was incessantly prodding him, “Hey.”

Kurapika glared at him, “What?”

Chrollo gave him a look, “Did you learn anything?”

Kurapika scoffed, “Other than you’re a bastard and homicidal maniac? No.”

Chrollo hummed, “You want to know how to torture someone? It’s not about physical pain, it’s about making them emotionally vulnerable first. Once you do that, you can cause significantly less pain and still get the same effect.”

Kurapika pushed him with his foot, “I really did not ask.”

Chrollo looked down at him, “Just some advice.”

Kurapika could not believe the flip his personality had done, “Did you get all your anger out or something?”

Chrollo mused, “About you gouging a hole in my back? Yeah.”

Kurapika threw the blanket back over his head, “I don’t get why you didn’t kill me.”

He could feel Chrollo’s gaze blazing through the blanket at him, so he pulled it back down to listen to him, “Because you did something that intrigues me.”

Kurapika lifted his brow, “What was that?”

Chrollo clapped his book shut, “Everything humans do, they do for themselves. We’re selfish creatures by nature. Even a mother will leave her infant child in a filthy heap of trash if it’s for her own self-preservation,” Kurapika stared at him, realizing it was Chrollo who had been left like that as he went on, “And yet, when it comes to the most selfless act of giving not only our lives, but all our hopes and dreams, we’re willing to give up everything for someone we care about.”

Kurapika was shocked, _he said **we.**_

Chrollo looked at him, “But why? What made you so willing to throw everything away for Gon and Killua? They didn’t know a thing about what you were planning to do. In fact, you were more willing to trust Hisoka than you were to involve and endanger them. Even though it meant you were more likely to die, and less likely to get any kind of revenge.”

Kurapika thought about what he was saying, “I don’t really know.”

As Kurapika sat up next to him, Chrollo continued, “What’s the most important thing to you, Kurapika?”

Kurapika stared at him in confusion, “Revenge.”

Chrollo shook his head, leaning back a bit so that their shoulders were touching, “No. That’s not it.”

Kurapika blinked, “What do you mean?”

Chrollo sighed, “I told you already. Gon and Killua, they’re not essential to your plans for revenge. They’re not really helping you at all. And yet, when you thought you were about to be soaked in acid, you still wouldn’t give them up. Even if it meant giving your life, and never getting revenge on me.”

Chrollo turned to look at him, and Kurapika was startled by how close they were, “It’s not revenge that drives you, Kurapika. It’s love and the desire to protect the people you love. That is more important to you than revenge.”

Kurapika looked away, sitting for a long moment in silence, “You’re right. But somethings bothering me.”

Chrollo hummed, “What is it?”

Kurapika thought for a moment, “You’ve said twice now, that you don’t do this for yourself, but for Uvo. And just now, you were wondering what makes **us** selfless. So I was wondering, what exactly is the Phantom Troupe to you?”

Kurapika turned back to him and saw the genuine surprise on his face, “What is the Troupe to me?”

He mulled for a long moment, “I’m from Meteor City. I was left there as an infant. So were the other founding members. My earliest memory is getting beaten half to death by a man who was stealing the only food I’d seen in a week. I rarely saw anyone else, so I started collecting old books people had thrown out. It was the only human interaction I had. Until I met Paku.”

A smile graced his face, not a wicked one like before, but a soft, sentimental one, “I remember meeting her and some of the others. And I remember the first time in my life that I felt true happiness was when we played tag for the first time. I’d never had anyone to talk to, let alone other kids to play with. And I’ll never forget the first time I felt safe and warm when I slept. We all slept together in a shelter we built from the rubble. The nine of us looked after each other, we shared our food and shelter, and we protected each other. And finally one day, we all left that hellish place, and we did it together.”

Chrollo gazed down at his hands, seeming to look very far away, “I tell them, that the survival of the Spider is far more important than the safety of its leader. But it’s hypocritical. Because I would lay my life down for them even though I forbid them from doing the same for me.”

Kurapika was shocked by the sudden willingness of Chrollo to share, “Why is that?”

Chrollo sighed, “Because they’re the only people I’ve ever loved. They’re the only people I’ve ever been able to empathize with. The only people who’ve ever made me feel human.”

Chrollo turned a burning stare onto Kurapika, seeming to almost look through him, “Until I saw what you did for Gon and Killua. It’s what I would have done for the Troupe. And I really want to know, what makes someone do that?”

As Kurapika measured the weight of what Chrollo had shared, Chrollo let out a heavy sigh, “I- am really wasted.”

Chrollo rubbed his face, Kurapika guessed he was trying to snap himself out of the sentimental mood he was in. But he continued, “Kurapika, I felt your desperation back there. I really understood what you were feeling. That’s rare for me, so whatever my initial intentions were, I’m not sure what they are anymore.”

Kurapika drew a sharp breath, “You’re not just going to keep torturing me until I break?”

Chrollo looked heavily intoxicated now, “No, I’m too curious about you now. Maybe it was a mistake, involving myself with you like this. But what’s done is done.”

Chrollo let himself fall onto the bed with a sigh, barely managing to keep his eyes open to look at Kurapika, “I’m totally wasted, okay? I don’t even think I can get up right now. So you should probably ignore everything I just told you, I’m sure it doesn’t change your opinion of me anyway.”

Kurapika had intended to answer him, but when he looked back at Chrollo, he could see the steady rise and fall of his bare chest, and he knew he’d passed out.

Despite himself, despite everything, Kurapika smiled softly, _he really isn’t much of a drinker._

…

 

Kurapika was exhausted, and no matter how much he hated it, Chrollo’s story had stirred something in his heart. Chrollo may be a scourge to the rest of the world, but not to the Troupe. And all the iciness he held for the world that had abandoned him, was turned to warmth for his comrades here. The only family, the only love he’d ever known. Kurapika couldn’t begin to imagine what that would do to a child, having to fight and steal just to survive.

Kurapika tried to resist the faint sense of fondness that was creeping into him, but he couldn’t. He reached a hand out, resting it on Chrollo’s chest as he slept. Kurapika closed his eyes and focused for a moment.

 

And he could feel it beneath his hand, Chrollo had a heart after all.

 

Kurapika sighed, laying down next to Chrollo. After hearing his story, Kurapika could understand the pain and anger he must’ve felt when Uvo had died. He knew exactly what that felt like. He wondered if Chrollo could understand what he’d felt, then.

 

In his last waking moments, Kurapika turned to look at the man lying next to him. Chrollo looked so peaceful. His breathing was deep and slow, and his face carried no tension now. Kurapika could feel the warmth from Chrollo’s body, and he closed his eyes, Chrollo’s peaceful expression the last thing he saw.


	4. Agony and Relief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content warnings for; torture, broken bones, stabbing, blood, and mild gore

            Kurapika was warm and comfortable as he slept through the night for the first time in weeks. He had a couple bad dreams, but they weren’t the kind that would wake him up in a cold sweat. Kurapika woke up drowsily in the morning. He was so warm, more so than he had been since coming to Yorknew to hunt the Troupe.

He stirred, he was too warm. Waking up, he remembered the night before through the haze of drunkenness. And he realized with a jolt that he was so warm because Chrollo was laying half on top of him.

He squirmed beneath Chrollo, shoving him as hard as he could, but he realized quickly that Chrollo was awake and smiling, his arms holding Kurapika in place.

Kurapika shoved harder, “Get off of me.”

Chrollo groaned, “Are you sure? You looked awfully happy curled up in my arms.”

Chrollo gave him a mischievous smile, but Kurapika just shoved his hands into Chrollo’s face, “I’m sure, now get off.”

Chrollo rolled off of him, taking the blanket with him. Kurapika glared at him, but Chrollo showed no intention of getting up. Cold air nipped at Kurapika as he lay there, and he may have regretted kicking Chrollo off just a bit.

 

Kurapika dozed for a while longer before he heard Chrollo stirring. They were silent for a while before Chrollo finally seemed to ditch his hangover and got to his feet. He rubbed his face for a moment before turning to Kurapika, “I’m going to be out for a while. I’ll have Shizuku bring you food and water.”

Kurapika looked at him in surprise, “How long will you be gone?”

Chrollo was fastening his coat as he spoke, “Four days, maybe.”

Kurapika blinked at him, “What will you be doing?”

Chrollo adjusted his cuffs, “I’ve got a score to settle. I’m taking Feitan, Machi, Paku, Phinks, Nobunaga, and Shalnark with me. Shizuku and Franklin will be staying here at the base with you, and everyone else will probably be up to some mischief or another.”

Kurapika hadn’t known he was planning an attack, “Gon and Killua… They won’t be hurt, right?”

Chrollo looked at him, “You worry too much. I have no intention of breaking my promise. My quarrel is with Silva Zoldyck. No one else.”

Kurapika stared at the ground, “People are going to get hurt though, aren’t they?”

Chrollo gave no indicator that he felt bad about that, “If they get in our way, possibly. But I won’t go out of my way to cause harm.”

Kurapika wasn’t sure he believed him, but he also knew there was no point in trying to argue, so he just sat quietly. Chrollo gestured to him, so Kurapika stood up and followed him. He led the way up the steps to the ground level floor. The members Chrollo had named off were gathered there, and hostile glares shot Kurapika the moment he stepped into sight.

Kurapika noticed a man in a blue yukata giving off a particular malevolent bloodlust, “Have fun with your little pet, Chrollo?”

Kurapika glared back at him, but before he could reply, Chrollo silenced the man with a wave and his usual calm but matter-of-fact tone, “That’s enough, Nobunaga.”

Nobunaga got to his feet, intersecting Chrollo, “Why won’t you just kill him already?”

Kurapika was shocked at the way Nobunaga raised his voice at Chrollo, but Chrollo was unmoved, and he spoke quietly, “I said that’s enough.”

Nobunaga stepped closer, right in Chrollo’s face as he challenged him, “He killed Uvo! The hell are you doing prancing him around like some kind of toy?”

Kurapika pushed his way forward, but Chrollo stopped him with a hand, “Calm down. Both of you.”

Nobunaga grabbed Chrollo by his collar, “Damn it, Chrollo!”

Chrollo calmly placed his hand atop Nobunaga’s, but before he could speak, Feitan, Machi and Shalnark had all grabbed Nobunaga, “Back off him, Nobunaga!”

Machi glared at him, “How dare you speak to him that way.”

Chrollo sighed softly, gently removing everyone from each other. He placed himself in between them all, “It’s all right,” he turned to Nobunaga, “I know you want to avenge Uvo. We all do, and we will. But for now, I’m asking you to trust me as you always have. Kurapika isn’t going anywhere, so for now, let’s focus on Silva.” Kurapika was disconcerted to hear how casually Chrollo mentioned that he still wanted revenge, but he dared not to speak.

Machi and Feitan stood back, and Nobunaga sighed, sitting down by Chrollo’s feet, “Sorry, boss.”

Chrollo rested his hand on Nobunaga’s shoulder, “It’s all right. I understand.”

Nobunaga looked up at him, and Kurapika reeled to see the tears in his eyes, “Thanks.”

Chrollo gave him a solemn nod, then turned to the rest of the Troupe that was gathered, sitting down shoulder to shoulder with Nobunaga.

Chrollo addressed the Troupe while Nobunaga wiped his tears, “All right. Listen up.”

 

…

 

            Kurapika sighed. Chrollo had left him a stack of books to read while he waited for him to return. Now Kurapika closed the last one, Chrollo and the troupe members he’d taken had been gone for over a week. Kurapika wasn’t sure if he should worry. Chrollo was facing Silva Zoldyck, and Kurapika knew it would be a miracle if he won.

He’d been lying there in mind-numbing boredness for a while when he heard a commotion from upstairs. He sat up, straining to hear what was being said. He could hear the anxiety in their voices, but he couldn’t hear what was being said.

Kurapika tapped his foot while he waited for someone to come down to him. He recognized the footsteps immediately.

 

Chrollo was back.

 

Kurapika gaped in surprise at the sight of him. He was covered in blood, his hair in complete disarray, His cheek was blackened, and his zygomatic bone was clearly fractured.

 

Chrollo’s eyes were hazy as he let his coat drop from his shoulders. Kurapika gasped at the huge wound from his chest to his groin. It was poorly stitched shut and blood oozed from around the sutures. Chrollo didn’t even acknowledge Kurapika as he pressed his back to the wall and slid down onto the floor. He let out a quiet gasp of pain as he settled.

Kurapika stood up slowly, uncertainly crossing the room to where Chrollo was sitting with a vacant look in his eyes. He crouched down next to him, not daring to touch him, “Chrollo?”

Chrollo let out a rattling breath, but didn’t answer. Kurapika gently touched him, “What happened?”

Chrollo looked up at him weakly, “Paku’s dead.”

Kurapika reeled in shock, “What?”

Chrollo coughed, grimacing in pain as he did, “Silva. He knew we were coming.”

He looked like he wanted to continue, but he broke off, touching his hand delicately over his wound. Kurapika moved his hand gently, “Let me help you.”

He leaned Chrollo back, moving his arms so that he could see the wound. He froze for a moment, _why am I doing this?_ He stared down at Chrollo, who looked too weak to do anything.

As Kurapika second guessed himself, Chrollo coughed again, this time a pulse of blood burst from part of the wound. Kurapika felt sick at the sight of it, but more than anything, he couldn’t just ignore it. He scowled as he closed his eyes, preparing to conjure his Holy Chain.

Chrollo’s hand brushed his. Kurapika looked at him in surprise as Chrollo eyed him wearily, “What are you doing?”

Kurapika brushed his hand away, ignoring him. He drew his Holy Chain, wrapping it around Chrollo. He focused his nen, watching as the wound began to close. Chrollo never took his eyes off Kurapika, a look of confusion in them. When he’d finished, Kurapika swayed with dizziness, leaning back and slumping onto one hand, the other one rubbing his eyes.

Kurapika sighed, laying back. He closed his eyes for a long time. He felt sure he’d dozed off at some point, but he stirred when he felt something prodding his side. He opened his eyes and sat up to see Chrollo. He sat back against the wall opposite of Chrollo, “What happened?”

Chrollo eyed him for a moment before looking at the floor, “Someone tipped Silva Zoldyck off about our attack. We had one of the dons hire him for an assignment and we were going to intercept him and take him out. He killed one of us a year back, and we’ve been waiting to take him on ever since. But he caught wind of it somehow, and he showed up with his father, wife, and son.”

Kurapika gasped, “Killua?”

Chrollo shook his head, “No, Illumi. I’ve hired him before. We weren’t prepared to fight them all so I called the retreat but Nobunaga attacked him anyway. I should’ve known he was still too raw about Uvo to trust his judgement on this, but I wanted him to get some closure. I sent Feitan, Machi, Phinks, and Shalnark back, but Paku tried to help Nobunaga. I intercepted Silva and Zeno thinking those two could handle Kikyo and Illumi.”

He paused for a long moment, “But I was wrong, Illumi overwhelmed Nobunaga and Paku tried to take them both on. I broke from Silva and Zeno thinking I could open an escape. But I’d been so focused on Paku and Nobunaga that I missed the old man’s Dragon Lance.”

He gestured to his abdomen with a sigh, “Bastard damn near eviscerated me with it. And Silva finished it,” his eyes grew very dark and distant, “I tell the Spider’s they are never to risk themselves for me… Paku was always so loyal, but I mistakenly believed that her loyalty was to the Spider, when in fact, it was to me.”

Kurapika looked away, “She died protecting you?”

Chrollo’s voice had grown low and quiet, “She gave her life to save me and open an escape for Nobunaga and I. And I’ll never forgive her for it either.”

His voice had grown strained at the end, and when Kurapika looked back to him, he was stunned to see the tears that poured down his face. Kurapika was speechless, he had no idea what to say as Chrollo’s tears caught the firelight and danced with it. He couldn’t say he was sorry, because truthfully, he wasn’t sorry. Very faintly, he felt a bit of remorse that Paku had been so selfless for another human being, but he couldn’t shake the fact she was a Spider. And though he felt some sympathy for Chrollo as he wept in the candlelight, it wasn’t enough to make him feel genuinely sorry.

 

They had sat in silence for what felt like an eternity. Chrollo had eventually wiped his tears, and now he sat staring blankly at a candle. Kurapika had no words for him, so instead, he found his way to the corner of the room where no candlelight reached and sat there.

He heard footsteps approaching, and the door to the room opened slightly, a quiet voice reaching in, “Chrollo?”

 

Chrollo didn’t look away from the candle.

 

Kurapika watched as Nobunaga entered the room. The man walked tentatively towards where Chrollo was sitting, looking uncertain about what to do next as he stood over him. Chrollo spoke to him softly, “Sit with me, Nobunaga, and let us mourn our friend together.”

Kurapika was taken aback by the gentleness Chrollo was showing. Nobunaga sighed, pausing for a bit longer before he dropped himself onto the ground next to Chrollo. They sat with a hair length of space between them for a long while.

And then Nobunaga began to weep. Unlike Chrollo, he sobbed when he cried. For the first time, Chrollo looked away from the candle and directly at Nobunaga. He reached his arm around the pathetic looking man and pulled him closer while he wailed.

Nobunaga leaned into the embrace, crying into his own hands, his words barely eligible, “Paku! I’m so sorry, Paku!”

 

Chrollo said nothing, just sat with him.

 

Some time later, when Nobunaga had gotten over the worst of his grievances, Machi stepped quietly into the room. She said nothing, only sitting quietly on Chrollo’s other side. She let out a shuddering sigh, and gently rested her head on Chrollo’s shoulder. Chrollo gazed down at her for a while before turning back to the candle once more. As Kurapika watched her, he swore he could see a single tear run down her face.

Kurapika had retreated farther into the shadows when Feitan and Phinks arrived. Phinks entered the room, sitting next to Machi. He covered his face with his hands and shook his head. Feitan didn’t join them, he leaned in the doorway watching the scene. He didn’t shed any tears, but there was a profoundly solemn air around him.

Kurapika couldn’t help but feel surprised by Chrollo’s tenderness in the situation. They were genuinely mourning and grieving, something Kurapika didn’t think they would have been capable of.

 

And yet, they shared their pain by the candlelight.

 

…

 

Two days had passed since Paku had been killed. Kurapika had passed out after Chrollo had coaxed the others out of the room and convinced them to go and get some rest. Chrollo had stayed with Kurapika for a while longer, though they shared no words between them.

Kurapika must have exhausted himself healing Chrollo, because he had slept the entire first day away and spent the second day resting in bed.

Now Chrollo returned for the first time since Kurapika had awakened, “I’m going to be gone again.”

Kurapika glanced at him, “Again? What for?”

Chrollo fastened his boots tightly, “I’ve got a mole to snuff out.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, he’d been assuming it was Hisoka who had ratted them out, but it sounded like Chrollo thought otherwise, “You found the mole already?”

Chrollo nodded, “I’m only taking Machi and Shalnark to help me, and Shizuku for clean up.”

Kurapika sighed, “How long this time?”

Chrollo didn’t look up as he spoke, “Not long. A day perhaps.”

Kurapika stared at the pile of books he’d read over, hoping he’d still be tired enough to sleep some more to kill the time. Chrollo stood up, giving a curt nod to Kurapika as he left. Kurapika sighed, laying back down.

He’d just begun to drift off when a loud noise woke him. He shot upright, hearing yelling coming down from above.

He could hear Nobunaga shouting at Chrollo, “The hell you mean I’m not going?”

Chrollo’s voice was barely audible as he was speaking much more quietly, “You’re not in a clear headspace. You’re staying behind.”

Nobunaga shouted back, “Fuck you! I’m not letting this bastard go after he got Paku killed! You can kiss my ass if you want but I refuse-”

Nobunaga broke off with a pained yelp followed by a hefty thud which Kurapika guessed was his body hitting the ground. Chrollo’s calm voice followed, “Phinks, will you take him somewhere to sleep it off?”

Kurapika shivered, wondering what Chrollo had done to him. He’d been so tender with them a couple of days ago, but perhaps his patience had worn through. Or maybe he was acting in Nobunaga’s best interest. Regardless, Kurapika laid back down, and this time, he slept.

 

When Kurapika woke the next time, he felt very, very cold. He was trembling as he sat up, ice in his blood. He was instantly awake, aware of the intense bloodlust raining down onto him. His breathing quickened as he stood up, backing into a corner of the room.

The door opened suddenly, and Hisoka stepped in.

Kurapika’s heart was in his throat, _is this all coming from him?_

Hisoka crossed the room quickly to him, and Kurapika realized he was using in, completely hiding his presence.

Kurapika caught his breath as Hisoka pinned him to the wall and whispered to him, “Brace yourself. Don’t try to fight them, they won’t kill you as long as you don’t fight back.”

Kurapika was terrified, “What-”

Hisoka interrupted, “They’ll be here in a minute, just remember to stay silent and submissive. And pray to whatever God will listen that the boss comes back early.”

Before Kurapika could say anything more, Hisoka turned quickly and left, leaving no trace he’d been there at all.

 

Kurapika barely had time to process what was happening when Nobunaga appeared at the door. Bloodlust more intense than he could remember feeling drenched him, and it was very much directed at him. All his instincts told him to get ready to fight, but Hisoka’s words rang in his ears, _don’t fight it._

Nobunaga stepped in, followed by Phinks and to Kurapika’s utter dread, Feitan. Kurapika backed away from the advancing line until his back hit the wall. He could feel his knees shaking violently as they closed the remaining space.

_Do I fight? What do I do? No, I can’t fight them!_

Kurapika pressed closer to the wall as Nobunaga reached him. There was no mercy in his eyes, and he spoke not a word to Kurapika. His hand shot out, gripping Kurapika by the hair. He yanked him forward with such force that he was left with a handful of blonde hair. Kurapika stumbled into Phinks who twisted his arms until Kurapika cried out, “About time, Chain Bastard.”

Nobunaga lunged forward, slamming his fist into Kurapika’s exposed abdomen, and twisting his fist from where it had sunk into Kurapika’s body, “Boss isn’t here to protect you now.”

Kurapika coughed when Nobunaga removed his fist, and Feitan took his place, “Bring him upstairs. We need some more space.”

Kurapika winced as he was swung around by Phinks and dragged up the steps. Kurapika trembled as he was thrown violently to the floor. Nobunaga landed a brutal kick into his side, and he could hear one of his ribs snap. He let out a throaty cry at the pain.

He held still, saying nothing and keeping his eyes down, praying they’d stop.

 

But he knew that was a foolish hope.

 

Phinks delivered the kick this time, it slammed into Kurapika’s diaphragm, and he heard the sickening crack of his sternum as the breath was forcibly driven from him.

Kurapika gasped desperately for air as Feitan turned him over with his foot, “Oh how we’ve waited to for this opportunity.”

Feitan grabbed one of Kurapika’s hands, singling out his middle finger. Kurapika despaired, knowing what was coming. Feitan glared at him through narrow eyes, “It’s this one, right? The finger you used to restrain Uvo?”

Kurapika wanted to beg him not to, but Hisoka’s words came back, _stay silent._

Feitan worked his finger back and forth for a moment before he snapped it violently at the second joint. Kurapika agonized as Feitan took hold of his middle finger on his other hand. He snapped it with ease, and Kurapika could feel the tears of pain filling his eyes. Feitan took hold of his pinky finger next, and one by one, he broke them all.

Kurapika was gasping for air through the pain. Nobunaga dropped onto him, sitting his weight right over the break in his breast bone. Kurapika was distressed, unable to breathe under his weight. Nobunaga drew his fist back, slamming it into Kurapika’s face, right over his eyes. He punched him repeatedly, Kurapika could feel the bones in his face shattering, but more pressing than any other sensation was the agony in his chest.

When Nobunaga finally got off of him, Kurapika was barely conscious. Phinks straddled him with a short razor-like blade in one hand. A blade not quite long enough to pierce both layers of his abdominal muscles and deliver a fatal blow to his organs. His eyes blazed down at Kurapika as he brought the blade down into Kurapika’s gut.

Kurapika could feel the blood welling in his mouth as he tried to cry out, choking him. Phinks stabbed him over and over until Kurapika was hanging onto consciousness by a thread.

 

Then Nobunaga leaned over Kurapika’s face, snatching the blade, and bringing it close to his eye.

 

Kurapika spat the blood out of his mouth when he cried out.

 

Feitan grabbed Nobunaga’s hand, “Stop!”

Nobunaga glared up at him, “Why? He deserves it!”

Feitan pulled the blade from Nobunaga, “Yeah, he does. But Chrollo will really kill us if we damage his eyes.”

Nobunaga glared down at Kurapika, tears of rage falling from his eyes and landing on Kurapika’s cheek. Before he drew away, he spat on him.

Feitan coaxed them away, “Leave him there. We can’t kill him until boss says so.”

 

…

 

Kurapika didn’t know how long it had been. The only thing he knew was agony. He couldn’t get enough air into his lungs between his broken ribs and cracked sternum, so he lingered in a state of semi-consciousness.

His eyes were swollen, and they’d left him in a position where he could faintly see the outline of light in the doorway. He was freezing, dried blood clotting what was left of his tattered shirt. He fell into distress now and then, unable to get air into his lungs.

 

As he stared through the dark haze of his altered consciousness, he could make out a dark shape moving through the light. The figure came closer, and when it couched down next to him, he could recognize the strap design of Chrollo’s boots.

An unspeakable relief washed over him. In that moment of recognition, it didn’t matter that it was Chrollo, it was someone he knew. And if he died now, at least he wouldn’t be alone.

Chrollo stroked him gently, Kurapika was barely aware enough to hear him as he spoke, “It’s okay. I’m gonna get you off the floor.”

Kurapika let out a low moan in protest, but he could feel Chrollo carefully position him anyway. Pain seared through him despite how slowly Chrollo moved him. Chrollo tucked his face into his chest, folding his arms with extreme caution around his fingers. Once he’d done that, he reached his free arm beneath Kurapika’s legs and gently lifted him.

 

Kurapika moaned into Chrollo’s chest at the pain.

 

Chrollo laid him delicately onto the bed, but Kurapika was slipping under. He tried his best to open his eyes, but he could only see a dark, fuzzy outline of Chrollo as he leaned over Kurapika. Chrollo ran his thumb over Kurapika’s eyes, closing them tenderly, “Close your eyes. Go to sleep. You’ll be okay now.”

Chrollo’s voice was so steady and calming. Kurapika felt himself falling into blackness, one thought repeating in his mind, urging him to hang on.

 

_You’ll be okay now._

…

 

Kurapika was surprised to come to. He’d been so sure he was going to die. But now he lay feeling numb as he gazed absently at an illuminated ceiling. He laid there, mindlessly waiting for sensation to return to his limbs.

He expected pain, but when he lifted his arm, he felt nothing. He brought his hand in front of his face, and was shocked to see his fingers. They weren’t swollen or out of place, and when he moved them, they moved easily and without pain.

Confused, he struggled to sit up. His abdomen felt tender, but it didn’t hurt like it should’ve if he’d been stabbed multiple times. Wrought with wonder, he undid the tie around his waist and opened his shirt. Examining his abdomen, he saw not a single wound.

_What happened?_

He was suddenly aware of how light the room was, not like his underground dwelling. Kurapika looked around and was jarred to see Chrollo lying off to one side of the room.

Chrollo was contorted in an unnatural fashion, and he was far too still.

_Is he dead?!_

“Chrollo!” Kurapika called out, but there wasn’t the faintest response from the man lying on the floor. Kurapika summoned the strength to get to his feet, every wound on his body was healed, the only reminder a lingering sensitivity. He was a little unsteady, but he crossed the room and dropped down next to Chrollo. He was relieved to see Chrollo’s skin glistening with sweat, but concerned to see how screwed up his face was in pain.

Kurapika laid his hand carefully on Chrollo, who let out a pained groan in response. Kurapika looked him over, but he couldn’t see any visible wounds.

“Chrollo, what happened?” Kurapika couldn’t wrap his head around it.

Chrollo gasped suddenly, his eyes opening a bit, “It’s… my nen.”

He broke of with an agonized wail. Kurapika was shocked, _what kind of nen was it?_

Kurapika knew he had to get Chrollo off the floor, but when he reached under him, Chrollo gave a throaty cry, “Don’t! It hurts… too much.”

Kurapika felt bad, but he ignored him, tucking him in the same careful fashion that he had done the day before. Chrollo was significantly larger than he was, but even weakened, Kurapika could lift him. Chrollo vocalized his pain in a way that tugged at Kurapika’s heart and made his stomach twist.

Kurapika laid him down as carefully as he could. Chrollo was gasping for air, his face drained entirely of color, black, recessed rings around his eyes as he fell clearly into distress. Kurapika tried to soothe him, at least to calm his breathing, but Chrollo was inconsolable.

Kurapika considered crying out for help, but he didn’t dare. Instead, he just sat next to the agony gripped man, cooing to him and stroking his hair in the faint hope of providing some comfort.

 

When Chrollo finally stilled, Kurapika feared it was because he was dying. But with each tense moment that passed, Chrollo kept breathing.

Eventually, Chrollo opened his eyes. Kurapika leaned over him, “Chrollo, are you okay?”

Chrollo took a few labored breaths before replying, “No… not really.”

Kurapika stroked his cheek gently, relieved to see even the faintest bit of comfort creep into those dark eyes, “What happened?”

Chrollo was still struggling to breathe, “My nen… It’s called Lifeline Transposition… I can heal nonlethal wounds… the condition being… that I have to accept all the pain from those wounds.”

Kurapika stared in shock at him, “You healed me?”

Chrollo faintly nodded, “Yes.”

Kurapika was feeling lost for words, “Why would you do that for me?”

Chrollo’s eyes were glazed in agony as he replied, “I don’t know… maybe… I like you.”

Kurapika wanted to be repulsed, but he couldn’t be, “I don’t understand, Chrollo.”

Chrollo let out a couple rattling breaths, “Neither do I… This is something… I thought I would only use… for another Spider… and yet, I helped you.”

Kurapika just stared into his pained eyes, “I don’t understand… but thank you.”

Chrollo looked like he wanted to reply, but he broke of as a spasm gripped him. His face twisted and he cried out again. Kurapika leaned over, trying to soothe him. He knew exactly what Chrollo was feeling. It was originally his agony to bear. But Chrollo had chosen to take that agony on, even though he could have simply employed Machi to heal Kurapika instead.

 

_A selfless act…_

Kurapika curled up on the bed with Chrollo. Lying so that Chrollo’s head was tucked carefully against his chest. It felt weird, to have such an intense nurturing feeling for Chrollo of all people, but the agony the other man had taken was supposed to be his own, and he couldn’t ignore that.

He only dozed lightly, Chrollo’s distressed breathing keeping him worried enough to stay awake. Hours passed when Machi finally came into the room. She walked calmly over to where the two were lying together. She leaned over Chrollo without a word, she placed her hand against his forehead.

“Hmm…” She sounded slightly concerned as she hummed to herself, checking Chrollo’s pulse as she did, “Oh you’ve done it now, you idiot.”

She turned to Kurapika for the first time, “Can you follow some instructions to keep an eye on him?”

Kurapika nodded, “Yeah, I can.”

Machi explained what to do to help keep him comfortable. Kurapika listened carefully as she explained what to watch out for, “His Lifeline Transposition doesn’t transfer the physical injuries, but the stress the pain puts him under can cause numerous problems. Your biggest problem will probably be getting him to drink.”

 

She left them alone once more after she finished her explanation. Kurapika watching over the man he had once hated more than any other. Chrollo fell into bouts of duress now and again, and Kurapika kept a close eye on him when he did. He’d cry out deliriously in his pain. Ocassionally, he’d thrash violently and Kurapika would have to still him.

Come the next day, Chrollo still wasn’t able to drink anything. Kurapika had tried everything, but Chrollo hadn’t been able to keep any of it down. He gagged it up immediately each time. He had been sweating profusely from the pain the entire time, and he was now critically dehydrated.

 

Kurapika gazed down at him, still now, but breathing still rough. He had an idea, but he hated it.

 

Kurapika swished the water, stalling as he contemplated if he was really about to do this. He knew it may be the only way to keep Chrollo from dying from dehydration, but he couldn’t stand the thought of actually doing it, more for embarrassment than anything else.

Finally, he heaved a sigh. Taking a huge mouthful of the water, he leaned over Chrollo, tipping his head forward and connecting their lips. He let the water pass very carefully and slowly from his mouth to Chrollo’s. He expected the man to cough it up, but he didn’t. Kurapika repeated the process, hyper-aware of the way it felt to have Chrollo leaning into the contact, sucking desperately at Kurapika.

When Chrollo finally looked decently hydrated again, Kurapika drew back. Feeling intensely grateful that Chrollo was unconscious.

That joy was short lived when Kurapika looked down and realized Chrollo was looking up at him through hazy eyes, “Thank you…”

Kurapika felt like he was on fire from the embarrassment, “Don’t mention it.”

Chrollo gazed at him for a while, his pupils were heavily dilated, and Kurapika wondered just how delirious he was. Kurapika touched him gently, watching as Chrollo’s face relaxed, his eyes closing slowly. Just before he slipped under, he murmured something incoherent. Kurapika just gazed down at him in response.

 

 Chrollo was still now. Truly unconscious, he wasn’t experiencing the pain from his Lifeline Transposition. Kurapika sighed in relief, it was the first time Chrollo had fallen into a real rest. Exhaustion swamped Kurapika, and he laid down again. He let his arm rest over Chrollo’s exposed chest, telling himself it was so he would know immediately if Chrollo went back into respiratory distress.

 

But as he laid there, he found his thumb running languid circles over Chrollo’s heart, and he had to ask himself if there wasn’t another reason for his actions.


	5. Fondness

            Chrollo had stirred a couple of times, and once or twice had succumbed to fever dreams. He murmured in his sleep, occasionally making a face from the lingering pain, but Kurapika was relieved to see that the worst of it seemed to be over.

He was sitting up in bed next to Chrollo, reading through one of the books again. Chrollo had developed a serious fever, but Kurapika was immensely grateful that he could drink on his own by now. Chrollo had thanked him again for helping him drink when he’d come to, though Kurapika had been praying he wouldn’t have remembered that given his delirious state at the time.

Every now and then, Kurapika would glance down at him, but he remained still. Kurapika had wrapped an ice pack in a towel and placed it on the back of Chrollo’s neck to help with the fever. Chrollo had managed to change into a pair of sweatpants, but he’d kept his shirt off and now he lay with his upper half exposed. Kurapika had asked if he wanted the blanket pulled up at one point but he’d refused.

Chrollo was still sweating from the fever, and he would wake up every couple of hours to drink. Kurapika knew his pattern by now, and he was expecting it when Chrollo began to stir. Kurapika reached a hand down and rested it on Chrollo’s chest. A moment later he felt Chrollo’s hand brush over his. He didn’t need to wait for Chrollo to ask, so he reached over and picked up the glass of water sitting next to them.

Chrollo muttered thanks as Kurapika helped him sit up and held the glass close. Laying his hand over Kurapika’s to try and control the tip of the glass. Chrollo lapped desperately at the water. Kurapika hadn’t ever imagined that the lead Spider could look so frail and helpless. He laid back down with a sigh, “I appreciate it.”

Kurapika cleared the hair from Chrollo’s face, his fingers gliding over the cross tattoo on his forehead. He watched as Chrollo’s face relaxed and his breathing grew deep and slow once more.

 

All Kurapika could do was wait for him to stir again.

 

…

 

A day or so later, Chrollo began to recover for real. He could do things independently now, and though he was still in pain, Kurapika could rest easy knowing he was in no danger and no longer relying on him for water. They still slept together, Kurapika knew he should feel disturbed by their proximity but he just couldn’t. Chrollo had willingly put himself through hell for Kurapika. Machi could’ve easily healed his wounds, but it would’ve meant Kurapika would have suffered while they healed. So instead, Chrollo had used a risky technique to not only heal Kurapika’s injuries, but take away his suffering too.

Kurapika still didn’t understand it. But he didn’t need to understand it to know that it had severely altered his thoughts on Chrollo. Fondness had found its way into Kurapika.

 

Chrollo let out a low groan, rolling onto his side. He’d been tossing around for a while, disturbing Kurapika each time. He laid in that position for a moment before kicking out violently and throwing himself onto his back. Kurapika sighed, “You know you’re not going to get comfortable.”

Chrollo shook his leg violently for a moment before throwing the blanket off himself with a loud moan, the one that sounded a little too much like an ecstasy moan. Chrollo slapped his hands hard into his face, not moving them when he spoke, “I can’t do it anymore.”

He’d been wracked with restless leg syndrome for nearly an entire day now. He could hold still for less than thirty seconds, but he was still experiencing some pain and couldn’t do much to alleviate it. Even now, Chrollo was shaking his legs.

Kurapika sighed, pitying him, but also finding great annoyance. He’d kept Kurapika awake, and hadn’t sent him back to his own room yet. The room they were in now was large, not designed like a bedroom, but even with plenty of floor space, the ground was too cold and hard to sleep on. And Chrollo had been an absolute pain to try and bed down with.

Kurapika resisted the urge to shove Chrollo off the bed, “Would you like to get up and do something?”

Chrollo squirmed uncomfortably, “What do you have in mind?”

Kurapika shrugged, “Play a game or something? I’ve read these books a hundred times over and you’re kicking me in the back every five seconds so sleep is out of the question.”

Kurapika had let his annoyance creep into his voice, and he swore Chrollo nearly pouted at him for it, “A game?”

Kurapika realized quickly how his suggestion had been interpreted, “A normal game. Let’s play go fish or something.”

Chrollo hummed, still shaking his leg, “Games are no fun without bets.”

He was looking mischievously at him, but Kurapika was a step ahead this time, “You’re absolutely right. So, let’s bet on who sleeps on the bed, and who sleeps on the floor.”

Chrollo pouted, “All right, I guess.”

He sat up on the bed, and Kurapika saw him run his hand tentatively over his abdomen, “Does it still hurt?”

Chrollo mulled for a moment, “Not too badly.”

Kurapika sighed, “I still don’t get it.”

Chrollo let a soft smile cross his lips, “Neither do I. But I’d definitely love to find out what about you made me do that.”

Kurapika shifted at the way he said that, but he ultimately ignored it, “I’ll get the cards.”

 

The two played a few rounds, more to kill time and give Chrollo some form of stimulation. Chrollo tapped the cards in his hands a couple of times before sighing, “This isn’t enough, you know.”

Kurapika had been anticipating that, “Yeah, I figured as much.”

Chrollo had at least stopped shaking his legs, and he laid on his back now, “Why don’t we just talk? No games or anything, just talk.”

Kurapika was surprised, Chrollo wasn’t much of a talker and much of their time was spent in silence unless Chrollo was trying to figure something out, “No games?”

Chrollo huffed to himself, “I’ve had enough torture for a while, haven’t you?”

Kurapika sighed, “You can say that.”

They were quiet for a moment before Chrollo sat back up, “Okay. 20 Questions again.”

Kurapika shuffled the cards in his hands, “You start.”

Chrollo thought for a moment, “This is a lot harder when I don’t have a goal in mind. So, What’s your favorite color?”

Kurapika huffed under his breath, “I guess red. What’s your favorite food?”

Chrollo didn’t hesitate, “Caramel pudding.”

Kurapika snorted in laughter, “You’re kidding?”

Chrollo shook his head, “No, it’s my favorite.”

Kurapika made a face, “Huh.”

Chrollo tisked at him, “Your turn.”

 

They’d asked shallow questions at one another for a while, but Kurapika was growing increasingly dissatisfied.

Kurapika thought for a moment, the two had been communicating much better than Kurapika ever imagined they could, so he decided now was the time to ask the question that had been burning him, “Why did you massacre the Kurta?”

Chrollo took a long time thinking, and Kurapika would be lying if he said it didn’t stir his anger again. Eventually, he nodded slightly to himself, “I was wondering when you’d ask-”

Kurapika couldn’t help interrupting him, “Don’t stall! Just tell me.”

Chrollo looked at him for a moment, “I am. Don’t worry.”

He drew a deep breath and sighed heavily, “Meteor City and its residents have a very strong working relationship with the mafia. We, the Spider, are often hired out as individuals by these mobs. We get easy money, they get political gain, take out their opposition, acquire rare artifacts that we steal and later sell to them.”

Kurapika swallowed hard, feeling his anger burning again, “Like the Scarlet Eyes?”

Chrollo wouldn’t look at him, “That’s right. The Don of Lusko hired us, all of us, to massacre the clan for their eyes. But there was another reason, the Kurta clan was moving politically as their numbers increased, and they were usurping one of the mafias footholds in Lusko.”

Kurapika nearly retched thinking about it, but he was shocked to hear this, “You weren’t the one who wanted to massacre them?”

Chrollo gave him a look, “That doesn’t matter. I was still the one who gave the order to the Troupe.”

But Kurapika wasn’t satisfied, “It does matter! All this time I thought you were the one who decided to kill them but if it was the mob then I can at least make some sense of it. But how can I believe that?”

Chrollo watched him quietly, “Kurapika, if our motive had been personal, why wouldn’t we have hunted you down, too?”

Kurapika could only stare at him. He was entirely lost for words as Chrollo continued, “We steal the items, sell them to the mafia, and the mafia auctions them off. It’s a cycle.”

They fell silent for a long time. Kurapika wanted to believe Chrollo was feeling remorse, but he wasn’t sure he had that much faith. Finally, Kurapika sighed, “I can finally put some sense to it.”

Chrollo looked at him with dark eyes, “Put some sense to it?”

Kurapika nodded, his rage was waning, “I’ve laid awake every night, wondering why a band of thieves needed to commit genocide to make some extra money. I mean, you just steal whatever you need! I couldn’t figure out why they needed to die, couldn’t put a single reason to it. I asked myself why I didn’t die. I mean, I should’ve died right?”

His eyes were glowing a beautiful scarlet when he looked over to Chrollo, silently willing him to have an answer. Chrollo sighed, “I don’t really think anyone **needed** to die, but that’s what our orders were. And not that this comes as much of a surprise but we’re not exactly an empathetic bunch.”

Kurapika’s hands trembled, “Did you even bat an eye? Murdering all those people?”

Chrollo looked away, “Yeah, I did. For the children.”

Kurapika could feel the dam in his heart breaking, “All this time… I thought it was you who orchestrated it. But it wasn’t. And you even feel remorse, even just an inkling of remorse… but you do feel it.”

Chrollo didn’t answer him, just sat there looking away from those blazing eyes. Eventually, he looked back, “Is there anything else you were wondering?”

Kurapika felt drained, “Did you make them suffer?”

Chrollo shook his head, “No. And we took the eyes postmortem.”

Weakness swallowed Kurapika, “That’s good to know. I’m gonna sleep, okay?”

Chrollo gazed at him with concern in his eyes, “All right.”

Kurapika laid down, heaving a sigh as his thoughts drowned him. Chrollo stood and gently covered Kurapika with the blanket. Kurapika could feel him tuck the edges of the blanket around his neck before he sat down with his back against Kurapika.

 

A long time had passed, and Chrollo must’ve thought Kurapika was asleep, because he spoke to himself, “I feel more than a little remorse…”

 

…

 

Kurapika woke the next morning, and he was surprised to find himself feeling relieved. It must have been cathartic finally getting to hear an answer from Chrollo of all people. He’d dreamed the night before, and for once, it wasn’t a bad dream.

Kurapika was chilled in the morning air, and he realized Chrollo hadn’t slept with him last night. Kurapika couldn’t deny himself the twinge of disappointment he felt realizing that. He sat up with a yawn and a stretch. Looking around the room, he noticed Chrollo lying on the stone floor next to the bed.

Kurapika gazed down at him in surprise, “What are you doing?”

Chrollo grunted as he rolled stiffly over, “I didn’t think you’d want me up there with you after yesterday.”

Kurapika mulled, “I’m actually relieved by what you said.”

Chrollo gave him a wide-eyed look, “And here I thought you’d have killed me in my sleep.”

Kurapika huffed a bit, but didn’t say anything more about it, “How’s the pain?”

Chrollo made a slight gesture, “I’ll be fine. I’m gonna get us some food okay?”

Kurapika could feel his stomach twisting in hunger as Chrollo stood up slowly to leave.

 

Kurapika had waited for some time when Chrollo returned with food. He sat next to Kurapika on the bed, and Kurapika thought he was still acting sheepish around him. They ate without words, Kurapika ate more and faster than he had in a long time. Chrollo watched him in slight amusement before sliding him some of his own food. Kurapika didn’t exactly thank him, but he ate it with enthusiasm.

Kurapika flopped down on the bed when he was done, grunting as he did so. He knew he’d eaten way too much, and Chrollo’s amused chuffing laugh told him he must’ve looked as full as he felt.

Chrollo nudged him, “You haven’t been eating enough.”

Kurapika grunted, “It’s been easy to forget to eat.”

Chrollo paused for a moment, “Because you were spending all your time making sure I didn’t die on you.”

Kurapika squirmed at the thought, “I guess that’s true.”

He could hear Chrollo shift with a forlorn sigh, “I never thanked you for that.”

Kurapika smiled faintly, “Actually, you did.”

Chrollo hummed, “Really? I was thinking of thanking you again, but properly.”

Kurapika shivered a little at the way he said that, “How would you do that?”

Chrollo pressed a little closer, “How would you like me too? Should I press my lips to yours while your consciousness is fleeting and help you drink? It leaves quite an impression.”

Kurapika coughed, startled, “What?”

Chrollo chuckled, “I’m teasing you.”

Kurapika didn’t believe that for a second, “I thought you were trying to thank me?”

Chrollo sighed, “I am. I was teasing you about the whole drinking thing, but I’m sincere about wanting to thank you.”

Kurapika rolled onto his stomach, “When you get an idea, let me know.”

Chrollo was quiet for a long moment. Kurapika could feel the pressure change as he leaned closer, “I have an idea.”

Kurapika was about to say something when he felt Chrollo’s hand massage his shoulder. He froze, feeling Chrollo’s weight lean onto him. He felt Chrollo’s hand pull gently around his collar, exposing the skin on his shoulders. Kurapika caught his breath, not knowing what to do. Chrollo leaned on top of him, Kurapika could feel his chest on his back. Chrollo’s free hand took his and extended them above his head as he pressed his face into the back of his shoulders. Kurapika shivered as Chrollo trailed his soft lips against his skin, his breath stirring against him. Kurapika felt heat form in his gut at the way Chrollo’s lips brushed the sensitive spots on his back and neck. He peppered soft kisses as his hand trailed down to Kurapika’s lower back. He sucked softly at the skin, taking it between his teeth and nipping it. The way he teased the skin made Kurapika squirm beneath him. His soft kisses moved up, focusing around the back of his neck. He freed his hand long enough to brush Kurapika’s hair out of the way, laying fully atop him now. Fingers running through his hair, Chrollo running those plush lips over his neck, measuring his responses to find the most sensitive spots. He sucked at the skin, biting down harder now and using his tongue to run circles over the bite marks.

Kurapika had been frozen in place, and when Chrollo pressed a kiss to the sensitive spot behind Kurapika’s ear, he felt suddenly vulnerable. He tensed, his shoulder spasmed and a sharp breath catching as he turned his face into the pillow.

Chrollo drew back a bit, his breath still warm against Kurapika’s skin. He paused for a moment, and Kurapika could feel his stare. He shifted his weight a bit, “Do you want this?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, the words catching in his throat. It was true he felt warm at the attention Chrollo was giving him, but he couldn’t deny the way he’d tensed up. He felt vulnerable and exposed, and he was still raw from the night before.

Chrollo made no move while he waited for an answer, and when Kurapika found his voice, it was barely more than a whisper, “No.”

Chrollo squeezed his hands gently before moving off of him, “Okay.”

Fear crept into him as he turned his upper body to face Chrollo as he sat on the bed. He wasn’t sure what to say, but Chrollo gave him a gentle look, “It’s okay. Don’t look so scared.”

Kurapika stared warily at him, “You’re not going to…”

Chrollo huffed, “I’m not going to force myself on you.”

Kurapika just stared at him, so he continued, “I do have limits, you know.”

Kurapika sat up, coming to sit next to him. Chrollo didn’t pressure him, just sat quietly waiting for Kurapika to relax some. After a moment, Kurapika sighed, feeling the tension drop from his shoulders, “Sorry.”

Chrollo lifted his brow, “For what?”

Kurapika didn’t really know ‘for what’, so he just stared at his lap, painfully aware of the heat that still lingered there. He tried taking a few deep breaths, hoping to calm his treacherous arousal.

They sat there for a while, Chrollo once again reading, “Do you always have something new to read?”

Chrollo smiled, “I do my best to.”

Kurapika sighed softly. He couldn’t lie to himself, that sudden realization was what had startled him earlier. But now as he sat there studying Chrollo’s profile while he read, thinking about the events of the past week, he was able to accept that truth.

 

He was definitely fond of this man.

 

Chrollo looked over at him, catching him staring. Kurapika turned away a little too quickly, and Chrollo hummed in amusement.

Kurapika sighed, he’d cooled off, and admittedly, he was a bit disappointed about that. He scooched closer to Chrollo, so that their shoulders were pressing together. Chrollo looked over at him, a bit of surprise shining in his eyes, “I thought I scared you just now?”

Kurapika huffed, “A little nervous, at best.”

Chrollo smiled at that, “Oh? I’m glad to hear that.”

Kurapika didn’t miss the light tease in his tone, “Oh, hush.”

Chrollo nudged him, clearly aware of Kurapika’s cheeky attitude, “Glad you’re feeling better.”

Kurapika smiled softly, but said nothing. The warmth of Chrollo pressed against him brought him comfort. He relaxed against the other man, feeling his earlier anxiety melt away. Chrollo clearly took notice, because he moved the arm supporting his weight in a way that allowed Kurapika to be tucked against his side. They sat like that for a while, comfortable.

Kurapika was lost in a daydream when he felt Chrollo move, his hand gently cupping Kurapika’s face and turning him so they were face to face. Kurapika blushed at their proximity, and from the way Chrollo looked right into his eyes.

They stayed like that for a brief moment, looking into each other’s eyes.

 

Then Chrollo closed the space.

 

He was soft, holding Kurapika’s face with a careful firmness. Kurapika was taken aback by how sweet his lips were. Chrollo moved slowly, carefully gauging his reactions. Kurapika found himself leaning into the kiss, wanting more of that affection.

Chrollo felt this, pulling Kurapika closer with a controlled strength. He swiped his tongue over Kurapika’s lips, and Kurapika impulsively opened his mouth. Chrollo pulled him harder and more aggressively into the kiss. Kurapika welcomed it, enjoying the way Chrollo used his tongue. He felt Chrollo smile against his lips, a moment later, taking his teeth to Kurapika’s bottom lip. He pulled back a ways, sucking on his lip. He didn’t bite too hard, but he put enough pressure to elicit a moan from Kurapika.

He turned his weight so that he topped Kurapika, leaning him back and pressing him into the bed. He paused, speaking into Kurapika’s ear, “You okay?”

Kurapika’s body arched at the way his voice sounded in his ear, “I’m good.”

Chrollo gave his neck a couple of testy kisses, “Do you want this?”

Kurapika’s hands reached over his back, holding tightly, “Yes.”

Chrollo laughed quietly, “Good boy.”

Kurapika squeezed tighter at that, desperately turned on. Chrollo placed gentle kisses along Kurapika’s jaw, letting out a quiet moan right into his ear. Kurapika shuddered, helplessly excited, he arched his back. He kissed at the skin immediately beneath Kurapika’s ear, using his tongue to draw circles against the sweet spots.

He stayed there for a moment, letting himself breathe against the wet skin. He began biting at his ear lobe, sucking on it and scissoring his teeth. Kurapika couldn’t resist the soft, breathy moans that escaped him. Chrollo worked his way down Kurapika’s neck, sucking and biting before running his tongue over Kurapika’s throat. He was fully aware Chrollo could bite down at any moment and kill him as he aggressively sucked at the skin over his throat.

Kurapika knew his neck would be thoroughly marked by the time Chrollo finished with him. That thought excited him further, making him reach and tangle his fingers into Chrollo’s hair, which he’d been wearing loose and down. He balled his fist, grabbing a handful of Chrollo’s hair and urging him on.

Chrollo moaned softly into his skin, “Oh, you like this.”

Kurapika was feeling too hot to answer, so he just looked into his eyes. Chrollo’s hands traveled down to Kurapika’s waist, undoing the tie that held his shirt. He exposed Kurapika’s chest, placing kisses over his collar bones. He spent some time there while his hands massaged Kurapika’s abdomen with firm presses. One hand found its way up over Kurapika’s chest, his fingers teasing the area around his nipple. Kurapika let a soft huff out, Chrollo working his way lower, brushing his lips over Kurapika’s other nipple. He kissed it before sucking at it, making Kurapika squirm beneath him, aware of the friction against his erection as he did so.

He teased Kurapika with his tongue, flicking it over that sweet, sensitive spot while his hand worked the other one, pinching and twisting until Kurapika became desperate. Chrollo sunk his teeth into his nipple without warning, drawing a sharp, loud moan from Kurapika. He soothed the skin with his tongue before brushing his hands over Kurapika’s torso. His fingers played with Kurapika’s waistband while he trailed kisses down his frontal length. He pulled slightly at Kurapika’s pants, planting firm kisses right where Kurapika’s abdomen dipped into his groin. He looked up into Kurapika’s eyes as he did, as though asking permission to go further. All Kurapika could think about was how close he was to his most sensitive spot, and how badly he wanted to feel those sweet, soft lips and hot, wet tongue over him.

Chrollo smiled up at him, clearly having read his thoughts as he began to untie the drawstring belt. He placed his palm over Kurapika’s erection, pressing down. Kurapika’s body jerked with the sensation, oh how he wanted this. He began palming Kurapika in a forceful but controlled manner, making Kurapika gasp for him. He brought his thumb over Kurapika’s tip, relishing the wetness he felt there. Kurapika was ready to break, ready to beg him aloud to finish it.

 

That’s when they heard it, Phinks’ anxious voice ringing out, “Chrollo! Chrollo, we need you!”

Chrollo heaved a frustrated sigh, closing his eyes, “Damn you, Phinks.”

Kurapika knew Chrollo didn’t mean that as he slowly got off of him, but Kurapika sure meant it as he cursed the other Spider. Kurapika groaned in frustration, but he was fiercely satisfied at the way Chrollo adjusted his own erection with a furious expression.

Chrollo stalled for a while, waiting for himself to cool off. As he stood up to leave, Kurapika called to him, “Don’t take too long.”

 

Chrollo shot him a wide smile over his shoulder as he opened the door, “Oh, don’t worry. I won’t”


	6. Frustration

            Kurapika battled his frustrations as he waited for Chrollo to return. Kurapika had eventually cooled off, though his frustration didn’t go away, and he laid down on the bed. He dozed off at some point, because he woke with a heavy ‘oof’ as Chrollo dropped down on top of him.

Kurapika shoved him, “What the hell?”

Chrollo snickered, “I thought you’d be glad I was back?”

Kurapika grunted under his weight, “Maybe if you didn’t jump on me while I was asleep.”

Chrollo conceded, rolling off of him, “All right, sorry.”

Kurapika sighed as the weight lifted off of him. Chrollo didn’t waste time, teasing his fingers over Kurapika as he lie there. He pulled at the shirt Kurapika had lazily put back on, “Where were we?”

Kurapika was instantly aroused again at the way Chrollo’s hands worked his shirt apart and brushed his skin again. He pulled Kurapika’s shirt off with enthusiasm, rolling him onto his back and kissing him firmly as he did so.

Kurapika welcomed the attention, though he wasn’t sure if that was because he’d been deprived of affection from anyone else for weeks now. Either way, he wasn’t about to deny himself this pleasure. Chrollo picked up quickly, tonguing him roughly to the point Kurapika felt he’d be smothered beneath the man.

Chrollo gave his neck a few more kisses to warm him back up and excite him. He trailed his tongue down Kurapika’s body before stopping and sucking at the skin where his abdomen met his groin. Kurapika bucked his hips forward at the sensation, quickly getting back to where he’d been before. Chrollo took note, making sure to tease him even more aggressively, running his tongue along the line between his hips. Kurapika huffed softly, relishing the feeling of Chrollo’s fingers gliding over his chest while he teased him lower down. Chrollo caught his nipples between his middle and index fingers, taunting them with a scissoring motion.

Kurapika wrapped his legs around Chrollo’s lower back, spurring him with his heels when Chrollo did something particularly good. He tangled his hand into Chrollo’s hair, pushing him lower and trying to temp him further. Chrollo grabbed his wrist, bringing his hand in front of his mouth. He brushed Kurapika’s fingers against his lips, making a highly sensual face as he did. He pressed kisses against his hand, closing his eyes and looking as though he was taking in every single detail of Kurapika’s skin. He nibbled at the skin before sticking his tongue out and taking Kurapika’s middle finger into his mouth.

Kurapika kicked his heels into him with a breathy gasp while Chrollo took his time sucking on Kurapika’s fingers. He wrapped his tongue around Kurapika’s fingers, hollowing his cheeks in an incredibly suggestive fashion, then sliding his teeth along the length of it. Kurapika was overwhelmed, pulling his finger free and pressing it to Chrollo’s slightly parted lips, sliding it across them and leaving a glistening sheen in his path.

When Kurapika retracted his hand, Chrollo swiped his tongue over his lips. His hands trailed down, working the drawstring tie free. Kurapika grabbed his hands, pulling them away. Chrollo paused, looking up at him, “Do you want me to stop?”

Kurapika stared down at him for a moment, some of his old vigor returning to him for the first time in weeks, “Take your shirt off.”

Chrollo’s eyes narrowed with lust, “Oh?”

He leaned back a bit, removing his furred coat and pulling his shirt over his head. Chrollo dropped himself atop Kurapika, the contact of their skin electrifying. A quiet moan escaped Kurapika at the friction between them as Chrollo pressed his tongue to Kurapika’s ear. That sensation was something incredible, Kurapika gasped, his fingernails scratching at Chrollo’s back. Chrollo sighed pleasantly at the feeling, using his tongue more forcefully in the hope it would draw more of that reaction.

Chrollo brought his thigh up against Kurapika’s crotch, massaging against him until he was out of breath. Kurapika was light-headed from pleasure as Chrollo brought his knee against his erection. Kurapika moaned at the pressure that made him ache, the moment he opened his mouth, Chrollo’s initiated another kiss.

Kurapika was growing desperate, pushing against Chrollo’s knee. Chrollo stopped moving, letting Kurapika grind himself against him on his own.

Kurapika groaned, “You take so long.”

Chrollo pressed his lips against Kurapika’s ear and hummed, “Patience.”

Kurapika sighed as Chrollo moved his knee, replacing it with his hand. He squeezed the outline of Kurapika’s erection, stroking his thumb along it and over the tip. Kurapika chuffed softly, Chrollo dropping lower until he hovered just above Kurapika’s crotch. He watched the way Kurapika was squirming for him as he hung there, so close, but just out of reach.

Chrollo pressed his lips down, kissing Kurapika’s length through his pants. Kurapika gasped desperately as Chrollo touched his tongue to him. Kurapika had never hated having a layer of fabric between them like he did in that moment. Chrollo continued the torturous teasing until Kurapika had basically melted to his touch.

Finally, Kurapika could feel Chrollo pull the drawstring open and gave a light tug at Kurapika’s pants. He couldn’t take them off quickly enough. Chrollo’s eyes never left him as he did.

Kurapika could barely see through his haze of arousal, “You too.”

Chrollo obliged happily, snapping his belt off deftly. Kurapika didn’t realize he’d been staring until Chrollo finished stripping. Kurapika burned with the awareness that they were completely exposed now, though Chrollo seemed unphased.

He brought Kurapika to straddle him, making Kurapika burn more hotly than he ever had before. He laid on him, smothering him with kisses while Kurapika was helplessly excited by the erotic sensations of their bodies pressing together. He moaned as their intimate regions pressed together under Chrollo’s weight.

He could see the light of mischief enter Chrollo’s eyes at Kurapika’s vocal reaction, “How would you like to make a bet?”

As he spoke, he let his hand trail down towards Kurapika’s erection as well as his own. Kurapika gasped, “What bet?”

Chrollo’s fingers teased the skin right next to his cock, making Kurapika squirm, “Who breaks first.”

Kurapika groaned, both from Chrollo’s suggestion, from the hand that was now gripping his erection, and the thumb that was slicking precum over Kurapika’s tip, “That’s not fair… You’re the only one doing anything.”

Chrollo smiled deviously, “Then you better change that.”

Despite his words, Kurapika was paralyzed by the pleasure Chrollo was making him feel. Chrollo worked him with slow, firm strokes while he kissed the skin on the upper inside of Kurapika’s thighs, “Your skin is so soft.”

Kurapika sighed into the sensations, Chrollo biting at the skin in the hopes of leaving marks. He moved closer and closer to Kurapika’s cock, running his tongue over the skin. Kurapika let out an admittedly pathetic whine as Chrollo brushed his lips up the length of his cock, before pressing a kiss to his tip. Kurapika could feel his leg shake with the pleasure while Chrollo continued to excite his senses with his lips.

Kurapika felt like he could barely breathe as he looked down at Chrollo, he willed him to stop teasing him. Chrollo gave him a mischievous look as he stroked him with one hand while his other palmed his tip, “I want you to beg me.”

Kurapika whimpered at the thought of begging the man he’d once sworn to hate. He still hadn’t totally resolved that, he’d definitely grown attached to the man who’d been taking care of him, and learning the truth about his clans’ massacre had shaken his core desires for revenge, shifting it from Chrollo and the Spiders to the Lusko mafia. But even so, the thought of begging **anyone** made Kurapika cringe, but that was intensified by the fact it was Chrollo telling them to do it.

Chrollo nipped the skin on the sensitive underside of Kurapika’s cock, “Beg me.”

Kurapika let out a whine, unable to bear the teasing from those sweet lips any longer, “Please…”

Chrollo ran his tongue along the length of his cock, “Please what? I want to hear you say it.”

Kurapika groaned, “Please… can you use your mouth?”

Chrollo mused for a moment, greatly to Kurapika’s frustration, “How do you want it?”

Kurapika sat up a bit and glared at him, “Just give it to me.”

Chrollo gazed at him for a moment before obliging. He ran his tongue over the tip before taking Kurapika’s length in a smooth motion. Kurapika threw his head back with a sharp moan, “Oh!”

He swore he could feel Chrollo smile around his cock, but he just kept moving in a rhythmic fashion. Kurapika had never felt something so intensely good. It was made all the better by the fact he’d been waiting for it for most of the day, and now he was finally being satisfied. Chrollo hollowed his cheeks, running his tongue powerfully against the sensitive vein on the underside of his cock.

Kurapika’s body was wracked with pleasure. One of his hands grabbed Chrollo’s hair while the other one tangled in his own hair. He knew he was going to lose this bet, but he just couldn’t bring himself to care. He was desperate for Chrollo to finish him already, he was so aroused that it ached.

Chrollo must’ve sensed Kurapika’s neediness, because he reached up with one hand and began roughly teasing a nipple while the other one spread Kurapika’s legs further apart so that he could get more of his length with each stroke. Kurapika trembled desperation, “Oh, please!”

Chrollo pushed his leg harder, moving faster and more forcefully. Kurapika pulled his own hair harder, and he assumed he was pulling harder on Chrollo’s too. He could feel the tension in his abdomen building, his head spinning as the heat overwhelmed him. He was panting desperately, his body shaking out of his control with the way Chrollo was making him feel. He knew he was reaching his climax, and when he did, he let out a louder moan than he ever thought he could. His other hand shot down and he held Chrollo down as hard as he could as he came.

He laid back, panting as he started to relax. Chrollo swiped his tongue over his lips before coming up and locking Kurapika in a deep, prolonged kiss.

When he pulled back, Kurapika could see the lust that still blackened his eyes, “Feeling good?”

Kurapika let out a pleasant sigh, “Yeah.”

Chrollo gave him a pointed smile, “Will you be a good boy for me then?”

Kurapika felt his emotional arousal stir again, something about Chrollo calling him a good boy had become a source of great excitement for him. Chrollo coaxed him up off the bed, easing him onto his knees. Kurapika stared up at him, something inside him baffled by how he ended up in this position.

Chrollo gazed down at him, a wickedly aroused light in his eyes as he stroked his thumb over his cheek. Kurapika swallowed, hating to admit to himself how impressed he was by Chrollo’s physique. Chrollo teased him, rubbing himself against Kurapika’s lips, his breath catching as he did. Chrollo held his chin with one hand while the other angled his cock against Kurapika’s lips, tracing it around as if he were applying lipstick. Kurapika could see the look in his eyes, he was completely transfixed on the scene below him.

He pressed more firmly against Kurapika’s lips, as if he was testing them. Kurapika obliged, opening his mouth. Chrollo gave him an erotic look, a soft moan slipping from him. He held Kurapika’s face still as he thrust with gentle strokes, gauging how much of himself Kurapika could take.

Kurapika was grateful for his care, Chrollo wasn’t lacking in that department by any means. Kurapika found his jaw aching quickly, but Chrollo held him steady, “Oh, you are such a good boy.”

Kurapika let out a soft hum and Chrollo gasped softly at the sensation. Kurapika felt the sudden need to make him do that again, only louder. He sucked harder, noticing the immediate response from Chrollo. He reached an arm around Chrollo’s lower back, willing him to thrust faster. Chrollo took notice of his growing enthusiasm and obliged him.

Kurapika brought his tongue against Chrollo’s cock, imitating what Chrollo had done. Chrollo huffed, squeezing a little tighter and telling Kurapika he was more sensitive than he would’ve expected.

 

Kurapika decided to play with that.

 

He drew back, grateful for the release of his jaw. He trailed his arms up Chrollo’s abdomen and chest. Chrollo gave him a curious and intrigued look as Kurapika turned his hands over and brushed the backs of his nails fleetingly over Chrollo’s skin. Kurapika brought his thumbs up over Chrollo’s nipples, drawing a gasp. He was greatly encouraged by this, teasing them with gentle pinches and thrilled by the way he twitched. Kurapika rose up a bit, teasing Chrollo’s chest with gentle kisses, and admiring the way Chrollo grabbed at him as though asking for more.

Kurapika began brushing his lips over one of his nipples, marveling at the way his body squirmed under the touch. He teased him with kisses before gently sucking on one while he took the other between his fingers. Chrollo let out soft, breathy moans at the treatment, “Oh, you cheeky brat.”

Kurapika nipped him suddenly, making him jerk forward with a sharp moan, grabbing Kurapika’s hair. He continued peppering kisses down Chrollo’s abs, noting how muscular he was despite his lean appearance.

When he reached his cock again, he took it one hand, teasing the tip with his tongue. Chrollo let out something that sounded like a whine as he drew his hand up and stifled his moans with it. Kurapika used his free hand to pull Chrollo’s back down, “Let me hear you.”

The look in Chrollo’s eyes was indescribable, but definitely good. Kurapika forced his tongue roughly and forcefully against Chrollo’s tip, relishing the intense reaction he was receiving. He sucked hard on the tip, watching Chrollo’s leg shake. Kurapika continued focusing on the tip until he could hear Chrollo growing desperate. He could feel the way Chrollo tensed just before he came, and the moan that escaped him made Kurapika feel aroused all over again.

Chrollo let out a half gasp, half sigh as he dropped onto the bed. Kurapika watched the way his chest rose and fell, momentarily erratic and rapid before it fell to a deep, slow rhythm. Kurapika decided to return the earlier favor as he dropped onto Chrollo, forcing his tongue into his mouth just moments after he’d swallowed. Chrollo was momentarily surprised, but he quickly brought both arms around Kurapika and pulled him in as deeply and roughly as he could. They locked there for a long moment before breaking with a deep breath.

 

They laid on their backs, taking deep breaths and calming down. Kurapika had been so warm in the heat of the moment, but now he was freezing, fully aware of the cold air against his nude skin. Chrollo was splayed out, looking totally relaxed though Kurapika could see the goose bumps forming on his arms.

Kurapika grabbed the blanket and tossed it over both of them, but its warmth was minimal. Chrollo seemed to agree, because he rolled over and caught Kurapika in an embrace. Kurapika shivered at how aware he was that they were still naked, but Chrollo’s body felt so warm around him that he couldn’t resist.

Chrollo sighed deeply, “You’ve got a hell of a streak in you, don’t you?”

Kurapika muttered into Chrollo’s chest, “Apparently.”

Chrollo seemed to muse for a moment, “It’s good. I like it.”

Kurapika smiled, but he said nothing. He had never felt so relaxed before, his mind was empty and his breathing deep and full. He let himself doze off, aware the Chrollo had fallen asleep by the slight part in his lips and the deep, almost soft snoring breathing.

Kurapika had been resting contently when Chrollo startled him with a firm and unexpected slap to his ass. Kurapika let out a slight gasp, and Chrollo murmured to him, “Don’t forget, I won the bet.”


	7. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for; mild violence

Kurapika stretched with a huge yawn. He hadn’t felt so well rested in years, and though the air in the room was cold and nipping at him, he was warm and comfortable. It was less of a shock this time to realize he was warm because he was curled up with his head on Chrollo’s chest. He could feel Chrollo stroking him gently, and could hear his heartbeat from where he was laying.

He stirred, feeling Chrollo pull him closer as he did, “Good morning, sleep well?”

Kurapika yawned again, “Yeah, I did.”

Chrollo interrupted his reading long enough to give Kurapika a look, “You slept all night and half of the day so I’d hope you were sleeping well.”

Kurapika sat up, “Half a day?”

Chrollo gave a mischievous smile, “Yeah, half a day. Must’ve felt pretty good to knock a feisty one like you out for so long.”

Kurapika grunted indignantly, trying to pull away from Chrollo, but Chrollo just held him tightly to his chest with a snicker, “I’m just teasing you.”

Kurapika sighed, laying back down again, “Sure. What are you doing today?”

Chrollo chuffed, “Can’t wait to spend the day with me, is that it?”

Kurapika glared at him, “Are you always this cheeky?”

Chrollo mused for a moment, “I guess so, yeah.”

Kurapika heaved a sigh, “Are you leaving again?”

Chrollo hummed, “For a little while, but I’ll be back this evening.”

Chrollo wiggled his way out from beneath Kurapika and got to his feet. As Chrollo pulled his shirt back on, Kurapika burned with the realization that he himself was still completely nude. Chrollo snorted in laughter at the way Kurapika yanked the blankets closer to cover himself.

 

…

 

Chrollo had left some time ago when he’d gotten a call from Shalnark. At some point over night, he’d replaced the stack of books in the corner, and Kurapika busied himself reading over them. The room felt empty now without Chrollo’s presence, and it left Kurapika with plenty of time to think to himself.

He’d been staring at the same page for a long while, lost in thought about the day before. Regret wasn’t the right word, he didn’t regret it, but he was questioning his motives. He sighed, leaning against the wall.

He mulled it over for a long while, _is it just a part of his game? Is he just going to draw me in then use that to break me? Am I falling for it?_

He sighed again, he couldn’t help but wonder. Chrollo had been gentle with him the night before, but was it all just his plan? And what was he thinking? Why was he entertaining these feelings? Had he really been that moved by what Chrollo had told him? And why had Chrollo bothered to tell him at all? Maybe he’d been so desperate to feel affection he’d thrown away all of his inhibitions to get it. And yet he’d never felt the need for affection so intensely before, so why did he feel it now, with Chrollo? Was it because he no longer knew what he was supposed to be doing with his life if the Troupe was no longer the object of his rage? Or maybe because he wasn’t even sure he knew himself anymore, or if he’d ever known himself. He’d sworn his rage would never wane and yet here he was, waking up in the arms of Chrollo Lucifer, and being happy to do so. And even if he could figure out himself, he wouldn’t be able to figure out Chrollo’s motives.

He tossed his head back with a groan, _maybe I just need to stop thinking about it._ After all, it **had** felt good, right? He’d definitely enjoyed it, maybe that was all there was to know. It’s possible that was all Chrollo was looking for too. But even then, it didn’t explain why he’d healed him before.

Kurapika slapped his hands to his face, he was driving himself mad trying to figure it out when there may not have been anything to figure out in the first place.

 

Chrollo returned some time after dark, grunting as he flopped down onto the bed, catching Kurapika’s attention, “Rough day?”

Chrollo smiled slightly, “Just a lot of stuff to get in order.”

Kurapika wasn’t sure how he was supposed to approach him now, whether or not something had changed, so he opted to be direct, “What’s in it for you?”

Chrollo looked over at him in surprise, “What?”

Kurapika fumbled for words on how to explain it, but Chrollo seemed to follow, “Feeling regret about yesterday?”

Kurapika shook his head, “Regret isn’t the right word. I just don’t understand what you get from it.”

Chrollo huffed, sounding almost indignant, “ ‘You shall forsake your relatives, mother, father, brother, and sister.’ ”

Kurapika sighed, “The Thieves Code.”

Chrollo gave him an impressed look, “You’ve read the Code? Well, I’m the one who wrote it. The first part was easy, I never had a family to begin with, but I purposefully excluded ‘lover’ from the Code. Maybe I knew I’d eventually end up here.”

Kurapika coughed, “ _Lover?_ ”

Chrollo smiled a bit, “Well, do you have a better word?”

Kurapika shot him a look, “Captive, fling, one-night-stand, I can go on.”

Chrollo pouted at him, “Do I impress you as the one-night-stand type?”

Kurapika huffed incredulously, “You’re like the textbook definition of it.”

Chrollo puffed out his lip, “Harsh.”

Kurapika looked at him, “But true.”

Chrollo sat up, sauntering over to Kurapika, “Would you like me to prove you wrong?”

Kurapika shivered as Chrollo’s hands rested on his shoulder, but he didn’t move them until Kurapika answered him, “Will you help me understand why I feel the way I do about a man I swore to hate?”

Chrollo shifted, crouching down and coming close to him, “Of course, it’s something I want to understand as well. Why I haven’t killed you, why I want to care for you, why you feel the same way.”

He smiled deviously, pulling Kurapika to lean back against him as he did, but Kurapika brushed him off, “Then I have something to ask of you.”

Chrollo backed off, looking terribly intrigued, “What would that be?”

Kurapika sighed, “I have no idea who I am or what I want anymore.”

Chrollo looked surprised, “What do you mean?”

Kurapika looked at him, “I dedicated everything to be able to get my revenge on you. And now, I’m not sure if that’s what I want anymore.”

Chrollo looked bemused, “What changed? Have I been too kind to you?”

Kurapika huffed, “You told me the truth about my clan. And now I’m not sure who I hate, or if I hate, or what to do.”

Chrollo hummed, “So, what do you need from me?”

Kurapika looked up at him, “I want you to fight me.”

Chrollo made a face that reminded him somewhat of a cat, “Fight you?”

Kurapika nodded, “I need to know what I feel, and if I can’t fight you like I want to kill you, then I don’t know what I’ll do.”

Chrollo blinked at him, “You want to try to kill me to figure that out?”

Kurapika answered with certainty, “Yes.”

Chrollo was clearly taken aback, but he looked steadily at him, “All right, but don’t get in over your head. If you do this, I won’t show you mercy.”

Kurapika felt his heart rate jump, but he gazed back at him, “Fine. I need to know that I still hate you, that I still want to kill you.”

Chrollo looked suddenly colder, “I hope you find your answer.”

Chrollo gestured for him to get up, so he did. He followed the other man out of the room and into the main hall of the building. Looking around, he noticed for the first time that the high ceilings and stained-glass windows looked like a church. Chrollo stepped into the middle of the clearing, catching Machi’s attention from where she was lounging.

Machi looked over at them, “What’s up?”

Chrollo gazed around the room, “Who all is here?”

Machi shrugged, “Feitan and Phinks, probably. Doubt Hisoka is here, but I think Nobunaga and Shizuku are around somewhere.”

When Chrollo didn’t answer immediately, Machi gave him a confused look, “What’s going on?”

Chrollo looked back to her, “Will you gather who you can? I’ll explain when you’re all here.”

Machi frowned at him, but shrugged, “All right, you’re the boss.”

 

Kurapika could feel his heart in his throat as the other present Spiders gathered in something like a circle around the clearing, with he and Chrollo in the center. Machi had been right about the members that were hanging around, but Kortopi and Shalnark had appeared too.

Kurapika glared at Chrollo, “An audience?”

Chrollo gave him a bone-chilling look, “Of course. They’ve been waiting for this.”

Nobunaga wore a ferocious look, “About time, boss. You were driving me mad making me wait to see you wipe the floor with him.”

Chrollo chuffed at him, shooting him a benevolent look, “Thank you for your patience.”

Kurapika could feel himself sweating, Chrollo didn’t seem to have a single reserve about fighting Kurapika to the death. The other members were goading him on with enthusiasm, except for Machi and Kortopi who were sitting with sharp but quiet attention.

Phinks was circling like a shark, “Make him pay, boss.”

Feitan chimed in, Kurapika couldn’t see his mouth, but his eyes told him he was smiling wickedly, “Tear him limb from limb, and do it slowly.”

Kurapika had been waiting for Chrollo to silence them, but no such support came the time. Chrollo was staring icily straight at Kurapika, welcoming the goading.

Chrollo looked around, taking in the fury of his comrades before turning his attention back to Kurapika, “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Kurapika could feel his legs shaking, but he didn’t have a single doubt, “I’m sure.”

With a sudden intensity, Kurapika could feel Chrollo’s bloodlust pouring over him. He hadn’t expected it to be so strong, and it nearly swept him off his feet. He stepped back as Chrollo stepped towards him. Kurapika jumped as a hand touched his back, and he turned to see Feitan pushing him back towards Chrollo, “Don’t look so scared, you asked for it right? Now’s your chance.”

Kurapika reigned himself in, Feitan was right. He focused, shutting out the terrifying sensation of Chrollo’s malevolence. He could feel his old rage begin to pulse, but it was painfully disorganized. Feeling the strain in his eyes, he focused his nen and conjured his chains.

He knew immediately that they were unstable and that he would need a miracle to win this. He struggled to keep his chains conjured, squaring off with Chrollo as he conjured his Skill Hunter book. Kurapika knew he had to tread carefully, Chrollo was a range fighter, but his arsenal was beyond extensive. Having five different abilities at his disposal made Kurapika one of the most diverse nen users he knew of, but Chrollo was in a league of his own with hundreds of techniques in his repertoire. Chrollo was a conjurer in his most simple form, but with his Skill Hunter book, he could utilize all nen types to their full potential.

Kurapika watched him like a hawk as he languidly flipped through the pages before stopping on one. His eyes only left Kurapika for a moment as he scanned the page before apparently settling on whatever stolen skills were on that page.

Kurapika wavered, feeling his chains momentarily dissipate. Chrollo gave him a wicked smile, “You know, I organize Skill Hunter based on which techniques work well together, which nen types compliment each other, which abilities I can use in tandem, which abilities are most effective against my opponents.”

Kurapika glared at him, “I do the same.”

But despite his words, Kurapika could feel his nen wavering, his rage completely displaced and unfocused. Chrollo was motionless, staring him down and waiting for him to make a move. So he did. Kurapika spun his chain rapidly, creating a barrier in front of himself as he advanced towards Chrollo.

Chrollo advanced, cautiously, but without hesitation. They circled each other for a moment, sizing each other up. Kurapika made the first move, his attack was inaccurate and weak, and Chrollo didn’t even bother using his nen, he simply slapped it aside.

Chrollo mocked him, “Are these your fabled chains? They seem pretty sorry. I thought you poured your nen into them? But these feel like regular chains, am I wrong?”

Kurapika was blinded with frustration and desire to find his old rage again, and he fell for it, “You’re wrong.”

Chrollo smiled wickedly, but said no more. Kurapika threw a few more weak shots, each of them fielded casually by Chrollo. And each time, Kurapika advanced closer. He knew he had to close the space, he couldn’t fight Chrollo at range with his chains as shaky as they were.

Chrollo made no move to back away, allowing Kurapika to work his way closer and closer. His ease made Kurapika nervous, it was like he didn’t have a single worry. Kurapika focused as much as he could, throwing an aggressive feign, Chrollo dodged it with ease, but Kurapika launched himself at him. He swung out, utilizing Emperor Time’s ability and focusing Enhancer nen into his fist. Chrollo still had both feet off the ground when Kurapika connected the punch.

He was fiercely satisfied to feel the way his blood roared, but his joy was cut short when he felt Chrollo’s vice like grip on his forearm. He swung his chain, trying to dislodge the grip, but Chrollo just tossed his Skill Hunter book and caught the chain, pulling Kurapika towards him before landing a vicious kick into his gut, and catching his Skill Hunter book with ease.

Kurapika staggered back, but Chrollo closed the space before he could get his footing, he landed a few brutal punches before swiping Kurapika hard across his jaw. The world spun as Kurapika swung his chain to try and back Chrollo off of him, but the chain whipped across his chest without making him flinch.

Chrollo’s hand shot out, gripping Kurapika by his throat with a crushing grip. He could hear the enthusiastic calls of some of the members as the world grew hazy around him. He knew this was his only opening, so he released his hand from Chrollo’s arm, launching his Chain Jail at Chrollo.

Thrill coursed through him as he realized he’d caught him. Chrollo’s grip released, and Kurapika dropped low, landing an uppercut into Chrollo’s sternum. He could hear the air driven from his body, but as he brought chain back to stab Chrollo, he wavered. Instead of a firm thrust, the chain tip pierced his abdomen, but didn’t puncture too deeply.

Chrollo let out a sharp grunt at the pain, stepping back to regain his balance. Kurapika swung his chain again, aiming for Chrollo’s heart. But as soon as it broke his first layer of skin, his will shattered, and so did the chain. He stumbled to his feet again, aiming to throw another punch at Chrollo, but Chrollo flared his shoulders powerfully, snapping the chain.

Kurapika was gripping with shock, Uvo hadn’t been able to break those chains. Was his will really that weak?

He didn’t have time to think as Chrollo landed a hard punch to his gut. Kurapika was still reeling when Chrollo’s knee connected into the same spot. Kurapika swore he felt his sternum crack again as the mocking jeers rang out. He stumbled back towards the middle of the clearing, struggling to breathe. Chrollo caught him by his hair, landing repeated punches into his gut until Kurapika spat blood. Chrollo gripped his arm, throwing him overhead as if he weighed nothing.

Kurapika landed hard on his back, no air left to lose. He was heavily dazed, rolling onto his side and coughing. He couldn’t even conjure his chains now, all the anger and self-righteousness he’d build his self-identity around was fuzzy and disorganized, and he couldn’t focus it.

Chrollo towered over him, “What’s the matter? I thought you wanted to take this to the death? Your attacks have been superficial at best.”

Chrollo drew his leg back, slamming a powerful kick into his kidneys. Kurapika glared up at him, but he just couldn’t focus that hatred on Chrollo any longer. He was desperate, he wanted to hate him again, like he used to. But he couldn’t. And he didn’t know why.

He stared despairingly at Chrollo, “I give up. I can’t do it.”

Chrollo stared down at him, “Already? I thought you were a little hellcat, what happened to that spunk?”

Kurapika spat at him, Chrollo eyeing him with more interest now, “So feisty.”

Kurapika coughed, still glaring at Chrollo, “I don’t even know what I want anymore. So I give up.”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, interest piquing them, “How anticlimactic. And yet you don’t look or sound even remotely afraid right now. Why’s that?”

Kurapika coughed again, tasting the blood as he did, “I can’t even conjure my chains. I can’t fight you even if I wanted to. My decision was made for me.”

Chrollo made a face of mock pity, rubbing Kurapika with his foot, “That’s no fun, and here I was hoping to steal those marvelous chains of yours.”

Kurapika froze, “What?”

Chrollo gazed down at his book, “Don’t tell me you didn’t notice? Those questions I was asking you, it’s one of my conditions to steal your nen. I see your nen, ask about it and receive an answer, which you gave me, make you touch the print on the book and do it all within an hour.”

Kurapika glared at him as he turned his Skill Hunter book around to reveal a blank page. Kurapika stared at him in disbelief, “You were going to steal my nen?”

Chrollo shrugged, “You were the one who wanted to take it to the death. What would it have mattered if I stole your nen in the process? It’d be nice to know what the contents of your soul are. You see, everyone’s nen is unique to themselves, like a fingerprint. Acquiring a persons nen is like reading a book detailing everything about a person, all their darkest secrets and most evil thoughts yours for the taking. That’s the true joy of my Skill Hunter.”

Kurapika spat again, this time at the floor, “You’ve got issues.”

Chrollo huffed, crouching down next to him, “It’s just a shame your nen was too unstable to be worth trying to steal right now.”

Kurapika gave him a mutinous look, “So are you gonna kill me?”

Chrollo made a disbelieving face, “What fun is there in that?”

Protests rose from a few of the spectators, but Chrollo hushed them. Nobunaga glared at him, but Chrollo silenced him, “He’s got some nasty fractures, I’m sure he’s not having his best time right now, so relax.”

Nobunaga backed off, but his face betrayed his internal dialogue was less than pleased. Chrollo lent his hand as Kurapika struggled to his feet, a look of victory in his eyes as he did. Once on his feet, Kurapika brushed Chrollo off, watching as the other man turned to leave.

He immediately regretted his decision as he was suddenly overcome with malice. He tried to turn to see who it was, but he couldn’t move fast enough as the blade sliced through his back. He snapped his jaws shut, refusing to cry out. He collapsed, feeling the sensation of the muscles in back tearing as the blade passed through it.

Chrollo had turned at the same time, and his hand caught Nobunaga in time to stop him from delivering a fatal blow to Kurapika. There was a moment where it felt like an intense pressure had dropped on Kurapika as he felt the fury pour off Chrollo at Nobunaga’s disobedience. Chrollo didn’t strike him, though Kurapika honestly wished he would have as agony split through him.

Nobunaga backed down quickly when faced with Chrollo’s rage, but the look he gave Kurapika as he sheathed his sword told him that the repercussions he’d later face were worth it. Chrollo crouched down, taking Kurapika’s hand in his own, “Can you stand?”

Kurapika tried to push himself to his feet, but the injury across his back made it impossible to control his muscles enough to lift his weight.

Nobunaga glared at them, “What’s wrong with you? You’re helping him?”

Chrollo shot him a look, “Back off, Nobunaga. I’m warning you.”

Nobunaga wavered, clearly afraid of Chrollo, “I can’t believe how soft you’ve grown for him. Uvo deserved better.”

Kurapika could see the fire that blazed in Chrollo’s eyes, and he was certain that he was going to snap, but Chrollo managed to hold his temper, fury seeming to melt the room around him, “Don’t ever say that to me again.”

Nobunaga’s eyes flickered around the room as the other present members stalked towards him, their anger clear at the way he was undermining their leader. Kortopi, Machi and Shalnark were particularly worked up by his display, though Shalnark’s face didn’t show it, his body language did.

Chrollo backed them off, lifting Kurapika carefully off the ground. He half dragged, half supported him out of the clearing and towards the room they’d been sharing. He laid him down on his stomach while he thumbed through Skill Hunter. When he found a healing nen, he hovered his hand over Kurapika’s wound. It burned like hell, and Kurapika groaned in agony at the pain that was almost worse than the initial wound.

Chrollo soothed him, “It’s helping, I promise.”

Kurapika struggled to breathe through the burning, “You’re healing me again?”

Chrollo stayed focused, “I wasn’t going to after you got so feisty with me, but this wound is serious.”

Kurapika groaned, “He was right, you’re soft.”

Chrollo was clearly still annoyed, because he pressed a hand to the wound, making Kurapika grind his teeth to keep from whining, “Is that so?”

Kurapika wished he was at an angle to bite him for that, “God, I hate you.”

Chrollo snickered, “No, you don’t. Otherwise, that shot from your chain would’ve pierced my heart.”

Kurapika knew he was right, and he was still in despair about how to move forward with anything. Chrollo apparently read his mind, because he hummed audibly, “Still worrying about your feelings? Why don’t you rest up, and tomorrow, I’ll help you figure out all those confusing feelings.”

He held those last words, leaning over Kurapika and speaking with a sultry voice. And Kurapika felt that treacherous curiosity arise in him again, and decided right then that he knew what he wanted to figure out first.


	8. Chains

                        Kurapika woke with a start to a pitch-black room. He sat up, waiting while his eyes adjusted. Looking around, he couldn’t see the source of whatever woke him up. Chrollo was curled up next to him, breathing deeply with something that sounded almost like a soft snore. He was still, looking utterly comfortable as he lie there.

Kurapika sighed, maybe he’d just had a dream. As he was about to lay back down, a loud crash outside made him jump. He sat upright, disturbing Chrollo who let out a grunt.

Chrollo twisted to look at Kurapika, “It’s just the wind. Don’t be so jumpy.”

Kurapika looked down at him, catching the grouchy look on his face, “I’m not jumpy.”

Chrollo scoffed, “Uh-huh. Wake me up again and I’m going to kill you.”

Kurapika stared down at him for a moment before laying back down. He could hear the wind banging things outside, and he couldn’t manage to fall back asleep.

Chrollo shifted again, “You’re hopeless you know that?”

Kurapika scowled though he knew Chrollo couldn’t see his face, “I’m just a light sleeper. Besides, I haven’t moved or disturbed you.”

Chrollo laughed softly, rolling over and wrapping his arm around Kurapika, pulling him in close. Kurapika grunted, but internally, it felt nice to feel Chrollo’s affection again. The man worked in extremes, he was either frigid or burning with affection and warmth, and Kurapika decided after his beating yesterday that he preferred his warmth. Chrollo gave him a tight squeeze before he settled back down with a sigh. The wind didn’t let up, but Kurapika thought it sounded quieter now that Chrollo was cuddling him.

He was too tired to reprimand himself for how content he felt, so instead, he just closed his eyes again and went back to sleep.

 

…

 

Kurapika woke early, the light was still blue as it floated down through the cracks high above in the ceiling. Chrollo was snoring softly again, his arm complete dead weight over Kurapika. He was warm and comfortable, despite the cold morning air and draft that poured into the room. It didn’t take long for Chrollo to stir, though Kurapika noted quickly that he was intentionally trailing his hand lower.

Kurapika brushed him away, “You start early.” Chrollo pressed his face into Kurapika’s back, humming quietly, “Isn’t it best in the morning?”

Kurapika grunted, “I wouldn’t know. Besides, I’m still aching from yesterday.”

Chrollo laughed quietly, “You make it sound like something completely different when you say it like that.”

Kurapika swatted at him, though he couldn’t reach, “You know what I mean.”

Chrollo hummed, “Yeah. I kicked your ass.”

Kurapika swatted at him harder, “You broke my ribs, cracked my sternum, and dislocated my arm. Again.”

Chrollo nuzzled into his back, “I healed you, didn’t I?”

Kurapika sighed, “You’re really something else, you know that?”

Chrollo huffed, “You were the one who wanted to ‘fight me to the death’. It’s not my fault you started doubting yourself in the middle of it.”

Kurapika hated it, but he had to admit Chrollo was right. This time, it really **was** his fault. And Chrollo **had** healed him. Chrollo seemed to read his mind, because he snuggled closer to him again. Kurapika relaxed into him, _Chrollo’s right. I **did** ask for this one. _

Kurapika wiggled in his hold for a moment, “You were never going to kill me were you?”

Chrollo sighed, “You got me. Though I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t fun knocking you around a bit. You really are a hellcat.”

Kurapika shivered at his new nickname, squirming in Chrollo’s embrace. But deep down, he knew he liked it.

 

Kurapika began dozing off again. And eventually, he fell back asleep. Some time later, Chrollo woke him with gentle shakes. Kurapika looked drowsily up at him, noticing that the room was brighter now.

Chrollo leaned over him, “I’m going to get us something to eat.”

Kurapika nodded, waving him off as he laid back down. He kept his eyes closed, though he didn’t sleep again. Chrollo returned with two plates full of food, and he immediately began to wolf his food down. Kurapika watched him in amazement, for someone so lean and fit he was eating as if he had a hollow leg. Chrollo ate with such enthusiasm, and yet his stomach growled while his mouth was stuffed with food.

Kurapika felt his lips quivering, and he couldn’t suppress the quiet laugh that escaped him. Chrollo lifted his brow and glanced at him, but his stomach was insistent, so he dove right back into his food.

Kurapika smiled softly, “You haven’t been eating well?”

Chrollo smiled, swallowing his mouth full, “It’s been easy to forget, taking care of someone so feisty.”

Kurapika gave him a look, but he knew it was only halfhearted as he finished his own food. When Chrollo had finished, he threw himself down on the bed with a huge sigh, “I’m full.”

Kurapika looked down at him, “You sure? Maybe you could eat a little more just to be sure.”

Chrollo smiled, still lying down, “Love your sarcasm.”

Kurapika sighed, feeling comfortably full. They were quiet for a while as Chrollo dealt with the consequences of his raging appetite.

 

Kurapika had been growing drowsy when Chrollo sat up, wrapping his arms around Kurapika’s waist and pulling him back, “What do you say we make good on that bet?”

Kurapika trembled at the way he said those words, “You gonna threaten to throw acid on me again?”

Chrollo huffed at him, “That’s not what I had in mind, no.”

Kurapika leaned back against him, “Good.”

Chrollo pulled him closer, brushing his lips against Kurapika’s ear as he did. Kurapika shivered, and he knew Chrollo could feel it when he did. Chrollo teased the hem of his shirt, placing soft kisses against the back of his neck as he did so. Kurapika couldn’t shake how sweet he felt when he did that.

Chrollo seemed to take note on what he was feeling, because he wrapped his arm around Kurapika’s jaw, tipping his head back to look at him, “You wanna know what I’m thinking of?”

He’d stopped teasing Kurapika to speak, and it was almost enough to make Kurapika say no if it meant he’d go back to it, “What?”

Chrollo took his hands, folding his arms carefully behind his back and holding them there, “Why don’t we try a new kind of torture? A much nicer kind?”

Kurapika turned to look at him from where he was still holding his arms behind his back. He wore a devilish smile, “That sounds like a paradox, ‘nice torture’ ”

Chrollo tipped his head a bit, “I love a paradox. Why don’t we see if it’s possible?”

Kurapika gave him a poker face, “Not like I have a say anyway.”

Chrollo pressed a kiss to his ear, making him shiver a bit, “That’s not true, we’ll need a word, right?”

Kurapika gave him a confused look, “A word?”

Chrollo gave him a mischievous smile, but he didn’t say anything. When Kurapika still didn’t follow, he gave an amused chuff, “A safe word, little hellcat.”

Kurapika squirmed at how easily he’d played into that, and at the way Chrollo had taken to calling him a hellcat, “Are you going to keep calling me that?”

Chrollo nipped the skin on his neck, “Does it turn you on?”

Kurapika tried to pull his arms free, but Chrollo held fast, “No, it doesn’t.”

Chrollo bit him a little harder, “I think it does. I bet if I touch you right now, you’ll be hard and wet.”

Kurapika tensed up, but not from the desire to get away. He wanted more of that, but he wasn’t going to just roll over for Chrollo, “You’re gonna need to do better than that.”

Chrollo’s grip tightened, clearly excited by the challenge, “Fair enough. Pick your word. I won the bet, so you’re at my mercy this time.”

Kurapika wiggled a bit, thinking for a moment, “How about ‘mercy’?”

Chrollo rested his chin on Kurapika’s shoulder, “I like that.”

Kurapika shook him off, “Don’t get too happy, I don’t plan to give you that pleasure.”

Chrollo placed a kiss on the back of his shoulder, “Oh, we’ll see about that.”

He wrapped his hand around Kurapika’s throat, squeezing gently in an almost massaging motion. For the first time, Kurapika noticed how big his hands were. He kept his other hand firmly holding Kurapika’s wrists as he squeezed a little tighter around his throat, brushing his lips across the broad of his shoulders and relishing every tremor that passed through Kurapika’s muscles.

Kurapika welcomed the sensation of the hand around his throat. Something he couldn’t place, but it made him desperately excited to feel the curl of Chrollo’s fingers into his flesh. He leaned back, giving Chrollo more access to his neck as he felt him give a particularly firm squeeze.

Chrollo laughed softly next to his ear, “You talk tough, but you’re practically begging for me.”

Kurapika squirmed a bit, but Chrollo held him in place, sinking his teeth into Kurapika’s shoulder and biting down until Kurapika let out a moan.

Chrollo sighed pleasantly, “It’s divine, feeling you moan while I hold your throat like this.”

Hearing that damn near made Kurapika moan again. Chrollo pressed closer, releasing Kurapika’s throat and brushing his fingers over his lips. He pressed his thumb to his bottom lip, swiping it as though he were smearing lipstick. Kurapika took the cue, opening his mouth and allowing Chrollo to slip in his index and middle finger. He toyed with tongue for a while, catching it between his fingers and squeezing it. He pressed his lips to his ear, nibbling gently. Kurapika squirmed when he did that, and Chrollo shoved his fingers further down Kurapika’s throat in response.

Kurapika sucked on his fingers, using his tongue and running it along the length of them. Chrollo nibbled on his ear for a while longer before pressing his tongue to it. He seemed to know it would make Kurapika melt, and he was right. He couldn’t stop the way his body jerked at the sensation, or the way small moans escaped from his lips.

Chrollo seemed to be enjoying every moment of it as he continued to thrust his fingers into Kurapika’s mouth, “I love how needy you are.”

He spoke right into Kurapika’s ear, making him gasp. He hated how fast Chrollo could get him worked up, it was like he knew exactly where all his sweet spots were. Chrollo pulled his fingers free, running them over Kurapika’s lips until they were slick, then pulling him back for a powerful kiss. Kurapika leaned into him, entranced by how wicked Chrollo’s tongue was.

Chrollo pulled away, releasing Kurapika’s arms, “Stand up.”

Kurapika gave him a puzzled look, but listened. Chrollo pulled his shirt off, running his hands over his abdomen with a smile before turning to leave. Kurapika waited for him to return, and when he did, he was carrying a peculiar object with him.

Kurapika gave him a look, “Chains?”

Chrollo smiled at him, “What can I say? You inspired me.”

Kurapika was unamused, but he stood still while Chrollo wrapped the chains like rope around him. He focused on Kurapika’s arms, but he loosely hung some around his waist like a belt. He wrapped a final chain around Kurapika’s throat in a fashion that functioned like a choker chain.

Chrollo strung him up as he had before, making Kurapika mildly nervous. But no malice radiated from Chrollo as he calmly worked. He circled around Kurapika, trailing his hands across his waist as he did. Standing behind his back, he played with the waistband of Kurapika’s pants.

Slipping one hand down, he gave Kurapika a firm squeeze, “See? Hard and wet.”

Kurapika squirmed, but knew he was right as he continued with gentle strokes. He let go of Kurapika’s erection, undoing the drawstring and stripping him slowly, seeming to take in every inch of Kurapika’s skin as he did so.

He stepped back, pacing around him like a shark as he looked him over, “This suits you.”

Kurapika gave him a look, “Is that so?”

Chrollo smiled, picking up a short black rod with multiple tails and twirling it in his palm, “You know what this is? It’s called a cat o’ nine tail, and it used to be used to torture prisoners of war.”

Kurapika groaned, “You and your torture.”

Chrollo gave him a cheeky smile, “ **But** … This kind of whip is much milder. It’s for playing more than torturing. This one’s made of leather, not those nasty knotted cords like the torture kind. It’s meant to sting, not lash.”

Kurapika glared at him, “Oh, that’s so much better. Thank you for the lecture.”

Chrollo puffed his lip, “You’re so hostile.”

Kurapika huffed, “I’m chained up and naked and cold and you're twirling a whip in my face.”

Chrollo shrugged, circling behind Kurapika, and giving him a light pass with the cat o nine tail, “There. Is it really that bad?”

Kurapika wiggled, he knew Chrollo hadn’t whipped him with any force so he ignored the question. Chrollo took a couple more light passes, and when Kurapika didn’t react, he gave his back a harder strike. Kurapika jerked in the chains, a hot sensation burning in the wake of the whip.

He could hear Chrollo make some sort of pleased sound, “You felt that one.”

Kurapika couldn’t turn all the way to face him, but he did his best to glare at him, “I can’t imagine why, maybe it’s because you’re whipping me.”

Chrollo gave him a vicious lash, making Kurapika yelp at the sharp pain, “All right, my little hellcat. Just remember your word for when you’re ready to beg me for **mercy**.”

Kurapika ground his teeth at that. The lingering fire on his back was surprisingly exciting, it didn’t really hurt, but stimulated him just enough to leave him wanting more. Chrollo playfully whipped his back for a while longer, apparently taking great amusement in the way Kurapika jerked at every pass. After a while, he just ran his fingers over the red marks that cross-hatched Kurapika’s back.

He hummed to himself, “Your skin is so hot and red. Does it hurt?”

Kurapika grunted, “You wish it did.”

Chrollo sighed, “You’re so cold towards me right now. Are you mad? Or just determined to get me as worked up as you are?”

Kurapika couldn’t help the faint smile that crossed his lips, _he’s right. I do want to get him worked up._

Chrollo smirked, apparently catching Kurapika’s smile. He could hear the cat o nine tail being twirled again. It stopped a moment before Chrollo lashed him hard once more, this time it left a trail of fire burning across his ass.

Kurapika hated the sound he made, but Chrollo was thrilled by it. He whipped him with enthusiasm, pausing after each one and marveling in Kurapika’s reactions. Eventually, he set the whip down, but the way he trailed his hand over the sensitive skin told Kurapika he wasn’t done yet. He gave him a playful slap, gauging Kurapika’s reaction. When he seemed satisfied, he gave him a harder slap, clearly pleased at the way Kurapika twisted in his chains. Chrollo slapped him until he tensed and wouldn’t relax, his arousal blinding him.

Chrollo gave him such an admittedly cute smile, “Does it hurt?”

Kurapika looked steadily at him, “A little sore, maybe.”

Chrollo tipped his head, somewhat like a puppy, “Here, let me do something for you.”

Kurapika scoffed at him, “I thought you were trying to get me to break?”

Chrollo repeated him in a playfully mocking voice, “Shut it. You’ll thank me for this later.”

Kurapika snorted, “You act like a child sometimes you know that?”

Chrollo frowned at him, “You tend to do that when you never had a childhood.”

Kurapika winced, feeling like he hit a nerve though Chrollo gave no indicator. Chrollo had picked up a bottle of something, and Kurapika gave him a mutinous look. Chrollo smiled a bit, “Relax, it’s to soothe the skin so it doesn’t blister.”

Kurapika grunted, admittedly grateful for that idea. He should’ve known Chrollo wouldn’t be able to resist messing with him, because he poured the cold gel directly onto his back making him squirm. He pressed his hands into it, smoothing it over his skin. Kurapika sighed at the soothing tingle it left, taking in the way Chrollo pressed his fingers into his muscles.

When he was done, he landed one more stinging slap across Kurapika’s ass with a laugh. Kurapika glared at him as he came to stand in front of him, still giggling. Chrollo kept a slight smile on his face as he admired him, “What am I gonna do with you?”

Kurapika couldn’t shrug in his bindings, so he just gave Chrollo a disinterested look, ignoring his own blazing desires, “I don’t know.”

Chrollo looked him from head to toe in a slow, calculating manner, while he brought his hands up to the top buttons of his coat. He began to unfasten the buttons, “I have plenty of ideas.”

Kurapika fought back his smile, he still didn’t know why he was so worked up from Chrollo. But as Chrollo sauntered closer, still unfastening his coat and never looking away from Kurapika’s eyes as he did. He snapped the final button free, dropping his coat to the floor. Chrollo stood directly in front of him, running his hands from Kurapika’s arms down to his thighs, lifting one of his legs and pulling him flush against him. Chrollo held him close, grinding into him while looked directly into his eyes. Kurapika held in his gasps at how confident and dominant he seemed suddenly. But Chrollo didn’t miss it, he gripped Kurapika’s jaw, pulling him for a ravenous kiss as he ground his hips particularly hard, eliciting a moan from both of them at the forcefulness of it.

Chrollo continued to tease him by grinding against him and kissing him hard, making Kurapika increasingly desperate for more. Kurapika fought the urge to beg him, he wasn’t going to give him that pleasure without a fight. Even so, Kurapika was painfully excited, and he could feel his own precum soaking him. He knew Chrollo noticed too, judging by his smug face.

He eventually dropped Kurapika’s leg, tauntingly unhooking his belt and pulling it away with a snap. Kurapika shifted against the chains, critically aware of what was coming next. Chrollo stripped with a smirk on his face the whole time. He stood straight and still for a moment, allowing Kurapika to take in every inch of him. Kurapika’s inner desire blazed more fiercely than a wildfire, but he wouldn’t admit that to the arrogant Chrollo.

But he didn’t need to, Chrollo stepped close, only a hair width between their skin as he kissed Kurapika in a rough fashion. He bit his lip hard, not letting go until he heard Kurapika moan from the feeling. When Kurapika finally gave in, Chrollo pressed close to him, grinding against him like he had been before until Kurapika was sure he’d pass out from how good it felt.

Chrollo took note, that devious smile dancing across his face as he kept their hips flush together. He ran his free hand down the length of Kurapika’s torso, teasing his painfully excited erection for a moment before pressing his own against Kurapika’s.

The whimper Kurapika let escape him was pathetic, but Chrollo was only encouraged by it. He took both their cocks in his hand, giving Kurapika a wicked smile as he did, “You’re gonna break if I do this.”

Kurapika clamped his jaws shut, determined not to let Chrollo win a second time. But the sensation was incredibly erotic as Chrollo worked his hand over both of them simultaneously. Kurapika let out a gasping moan immediately, and Chrollo’s face screwed up with a soft whine while he worked them. Chrollo thrust his hips to compliment his hand strokes, and Kurapika nearly lost it instantly at the way it felt to slide against him like that. Chrollo’s thumb smeared whatever wetness he could find, and the sensations of his movements made Kurapika moan far louder than he intended.

Kurapika shut his mouth determinedly, forcing down whatever other sounds were trying to escape him. Chrollo made a face, not smug like it had been before, but looking almost desperate as his voice came out soft and quiet, “You’re so stubborn.”

Kurapika knew he was right, the feeling was incredible, and if he weren’t so hell-bent on not giving Chrollo what he wanted, he would’ve broken the moment Chrollo started moving his hand.

Chrollo continued this for a while, his pupils dilated and a dark, heavily lidded lust blanketed his eyes. Soft moans escaped him, and he kept his lips parted and his head tipped back in his own pleasure. Kurapika knew he was feeling this ecstasy just as intensely.

Eventually, he pulled away with a desperate gasp, clearly having to fight for control of himself. Kurapika let himself breathe, he’d been so, so close when Chrollo had stopped. Chrollo gave a quiet laugh, “So stubborn. I was certain you’d break.”

Kurapika didn’t dare tell him how close he’d been, “I guess you don’t win this one.”

Chrollo laughed a little harder this time, “I’m not giving up that easily.”

He picked up the bottle from before, coming to stand directly in front of Kurapika as he poured some of the gel over his fingers with a shaky breath. Kurapika felt his throat tighten, not with fear, but with anticipation. Chrollo smoothed the gel over his fingers before picking Kurapika’s leg up again. He pressed his fingers to Kurapika’s entrance, drawing a sharp gasp instantly. He looked ferociously pleased at that, carefully curling one of his fingers while never moving his eyes off Kurapika.

Kurapika let out a throaty moan at the way he curled and thrusted his finger, it was mildly uncomfortable, but also incredibly arousing. Each time Chrollo brushed his sweet spot, his whole body jerked in response. Chrollo purposefully moved slowly, and without much force, making Kurapika desperately try to grind himself into him for more of the sensation. He was so blinded by that need for more, he barely noticed when Chrollo added a second finger. Chrollo scissored his fingers a bit, curling and uncurling them against Kurapika’s spot until the other man whined for him.

When he was satisfied with how worked up Kurapika had gotten, he picked up the bottle again, this time pouring it into his palm. Kurapika was already out of breath and light-headed from his excitement as he watched Chrollo smooth it over his erection before gripping Kurapika’s thigh firmly.

He pressed against him, Kurapika suddenly very aware of him, “You’re huge.”

Chrollo gave him a flirty smile, “You think so? But I bet my little hellcat can take it, can’t you? After all, you’re someone who needs to get all worked up before you’re receptive enough for something like this.”

Kurapika said nothing, but internally, he wasn’t sure he could. He just hoped Chrollo’s sadistic side wouldn’t take over until he was sure he could handle it. He was grateful when it seemed Chrollo would take it slow, gradually applying more pressure until he felt Kurapika’s body give a little with a sharp gasp from the bound man.

Chrollo’s breathing was tense and deep, while Kurapika’s had begun to grow erratic from both pain and desire. It hurt like hell when Chrollo pushed in, but he was able to take it since Chrollo held still, reeling in relief that he wasn’t sadistic enough to fuck him roughly before he could adjust.

Kurapika let himself breathe as Chrollo spoke to him, still holding his leg, “Relax, if you’re tense it just hurts.”

Kurapika’s breath was shaky as he spoke, “I thought you were trying to make it hurt?”

Chrollo made a face, “There’s more than one way to break someone. I can break you faster with pleasure than with pain.”

Kurapika shivered, feeling Chrollo give him a smooth, slow stroke as he began to relax his body. It still hurt, but it wasn’t anything Kurapika couldn’t take. He was more aware of how full he felt, his body never having been stretched like this before. Every move Chrollo made, he could feel it completely.

Chrollo seemed to gain confidence as Kurapika grew increasingly receptive to him, and he gave him a couple harder thrusts, watching the way Kurapika screwed his face up while his mouth opened and released moans and wails at the feeling of being fucked.

Chrollo sunk his teeth into Kurapika’s collar bone before he spoke, “Are you a hellcat, or canary? You were so feisty and stubborn before, but now you’re singing for me as if you don’t have a care in the world.”

Kurapika wanted to retort, but his body was too gripped by Chrollo’s smooth strokes to have any hope of delivering a stinging reply. Apparently satisfied, Chrollo gripped his standing leg, lifting him up so that he was half supported against Chrollo, and half hanging from the chains. Kurapika instinctively wrapped his legs around Chrollo’s back, and Chrollo clearly read that as encouragement. He sped up, giving Kurapika fuller, faster, and harder strokes while still keeping himself consistent and smooth. Kurapika couldn’t silence himself with how amazing and intense it felt. Chrollo’s aim was perfect, and every thrust sent a pulse of ecstasy shooting through Kurapika from his sweet spot up through his chest, making his head spin and world go blank with every connection from Chrollo’s savage pace.

 His mind was blank, chattering nonsensically as Chrollo slammed into him, “You’re savage!”

Chrollo gave his neck a hard bite, speaking between breaths, “That’s the only way you like it, am I right?”

Kurapika couldn’t answer, he just threw his head back and gave himself completely to Chrollo. He let out loud, ecstatic moans as Chrollo’s pace never let up. He drove his heels hard into Chrollo’s back, spurring him on with as much conviction as he could. His hands pulled hard at the chains while his body was wracked with crashing waves of pleasure.

Chrollo stopped without warning, making Kurapika cough from the loss of sensation. Chrollo’s hands worked the chains quickly, and Kurapika dropped to his feet, nearly falling as he realized how weak his legs felt.

Chrollo didn’t give him time to think, gripping his hair and yanking him into a deep kiss, his tongue nearly down Kurapika’s throat as he threw Kurapika onto the bed. Kurapika hit the soft mattress with a gasp, Chrollo instantly on top of him. He gripped both of Kurapika’s legs, resting them over his shoulders as he carefully eased himself back in.

The dark lust in his eyes was feral, “You’re flexible.”

Kurapika just stared up at him, his shoulders so broad and powerful as he held him there. He began giving Kurapika those same maddening strokes again. Kurapika shut his eyes tight with pleasure at the way Chrollo slammed into him. He didn’t care about how loud or desperate he sounded anymore, he was so fiercely pleasured by Chrollo as he fucked him senseless that it didn’t matter.

Chrollo was panting hard, sweat beading his skin as he sped up. He kept his strokes smooth and savage as he neared his climax, watching the way Kurapika’s face and chest burned red while his abdomen twisted in pleasure as he reached his own.

The pitch of Kurapika’s voice rose dramatically as he orgasmed, his whole body gripped with spasm as he came. The tension the gripped Chrollo’s cock as he did pushed him over the edge with an ecstatic moan of his own piercing the air. He released Kurapika’s legs, leaning over him and supporting himself on shaky hands as he rode them both out of their orgasms. Kurapika’s eyes stayed close for a while after he peaked, all the tension and worry that usually plagued his beautiful face had melted away, leaving him to take shallow pants through parted lips while an afterglow graced his rose-tinted cheeks.

Chrollo stared down at him, entranced in something more than simple lust. He let out a trembling sigh as he pulled free of Kurapika, leaning down and sweetly kissing the wasted man. Kurapika’s arms wrapped around him, holding him in their embrace.

 

The two slept immediately following their intense exchange, Kurapika tossing the remaining chains that had been wrapped around him to the floor before they curled up with each other. He was awake now, feeling his body and mind completely relaxed after his release. He felt Chrollo stir quietly beside him, prompting him to turn and admire his worry-free face as he lay there.

 

Chrollo was clearly not fully awake, but what he murmured next made Kurapika’s heart stop dead regardless, “I love you.”


	9. Wild Card

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for; mild gore

            The morning air had grown bitterly cold, overcast skies casting little light through the ceiling as Kurapika lie there listening to Chrollo’s steady breathing. Unable to stop thinking about the night before, specifically, what Chrollo had muttered when he was half asleep. He knew he shouldn’t be overthinking it like this, he wasn’t even sure Chrollo had been awake at all when he said it. For all he knew, Chrollo may have just been dreaming. But even knowing better, Kurapika couldn’t stop thinking about that “I love you” no matter how hard he tried.

Chrollo stretched with a grunt, and Kurapika heard his back pop as he did. He relaxed with a sigh, though Kurapika could feel him shivering in the cold air. He stayed still and quiet, not sure how to approach Chrollo with what he’d been thinking about. But for now, he didn’t need to have it figured out. Chrollo’s breathing fell deep and slow again as he drifted back to sleep, his hand brushing Kurapika’s back.

A knock on the door woke them. Kurapika sat up with a start while Chrollo rolled languidly onto his side, not opening his eyes as he called out, “What is it?”

Kurapika recognized Shalnark’s voice, “May I come in, boss?”

Chrollo sighed, sitting up, “I’ll come to you.”

Shalnark waited as Chrollo got to his feet and redressed. He left with a yawn and without a word to Kurapika. He tried not to feel a little stung by that, reasoning that if Shalnark had come to disturb the boss this early in the morning that his request must have a degree of urgency to it. Regardless, Kurapika felt cold-shouldered by the lack of acknowledgement from Chrollo in light of the night before. He scolded himself for his own sensitivity, forcing himself to lay back down and close his eyes. He didn’t sleep, too intent on straining to hear what Chrollo was discussing with the Troupe in the main hall of the building.

For a long while, Kurapika couldn’t hear anything more than faint voices. Eventually, he sat up, putting his own clothes back on and creeping towards the door. He pressed himself close to it, trying to make out what was being said. He was just about to give up when he heard a single voice raise sharply. Past experience told him that was probably Nobunaga, but the chorus of voices that began chattering immediately after was a bit unusual. He’d learned the Troupe argued daily, but most of the time, it was just peacocking and usually between only two or three at a time. This sounded like it was nearly the entire Troupe yelling at one another.

Kurapika listened for a while, everyone yelling over one another made it impossible to understand anything. A twinge of surprise worked its way through Kurapika, Chrollo didn’t seem to have control of them as the clamor continued. Eventually, a sharply pitched voice cut through the rest, silencing them. Kurapika quickly stepped away from the door with the realization that it wasn’t Chrollo who’d silenced them.

Steps approached rapidly and heavily, telling Kurapika that whoever was coming was seriously pissed off. Kurapika backed away just in time for the door to fly open. Kurapika glared furiously at Nobunaga as he burst into the room, a flurry of anxiety from the other members as they hovered close by the door, even Shalnark looked unnerved. Nobunaga was fuming as he reached out a hand to grab Kurapika, who swatted him away.

Nobunaga squared off with him, “Come here!”

Kurapika spat at him, “Go to hell.”

Fury blazed in Nobunaga as he lunged at him, they scuffled frantically for a moment before Nobunaga got a solid grip on his arm, twisting it with all his strength and waiting for Kurapika to scream. Clamping his jaws shut with every ounce of control he had, Kurapika only let out a throaty growl as he felt his left arm fracture. Nobunaga yanked him towards the door, the other members chattering with alarm as he did.

Shalnark circled nervously, his wide and concerned, “What are you doing?”

Nobunaga rounded on him, “The hell’s it look like I’m doing?”

Kortopi squirmed forward, “Boss didn’t say-”

Nobunaga spat, still dragging Kurapika, “To hell with what he says, I’m finishing this.”

Kurapika stumbled, only to be hauled viciously back to his feet as Feitan intercepted them, “Slow down.”

Nobunaga shouldered past him without a word. He threw Kurapika into the middle of a clearing, watching as he staggered to stay on his feet. He nearly tripped when he slammed into someone, relief swamping him as he recognized Chrollo.

Chrollo’s eyes blazed with cold fury, and his voice was low with anger, “What are you doing, Nobunaga?”

Hostility crackled between the two men as Nobunaga squared up with him, “I’m doing what our _leader_ should have done already. Let him go!”

Kurapika felt Chrollo hold him a little tighter, “Are you challenging me, Nobunaga?”

Nobunaga spat on the ground by Chrollo’s feet, “You bet your ass I am. Now, let that bastard go.”

A feral sound came from Chrollo, and Kurapika felt his muscles tense as though he were only a heartbeat away from lunging at Nobunaga, but he didn’t move.

Nobunaga met his furious gaze, unblinking, “Are you really choosing this bastard over the Troupe?”

Kurapika felt Chrollo freeze, “What?”

Nobunaga took a step closer, “Pick. Are you going to betray us just to protect that bastard, after he killed one of our own?”

To Kurapika’s alarm, Chrollo had no answer. He looked around at the alarmed faces of the other members, Machi spoke first, “Are you insane, Nobunaga?”

Nobunaga never wavered from Chrollo’s eyes, Phinks spoke next, “Nobunaga… Come on, I hate him too, but are you really going to challenge **Chrollo**?”

Feitan shifted nervously, “Just stop, Nobunaga.”

They fell silent for a few heartbeats, Kurapika looked around, catching Hisoka’s grave look. Chrollo still said nothing, so Nobunaga spoke, “Us or him. Let him go. Let him pay for what he’s done.”

Kurapika felt a few tense moments pass before, to his dismay, he felt Chrollo’s protective hold weaken. He looked up at him to see the desperation in his eyes as he and Nobunaga stared at each other.

Chrollo finally spoke, glancing down at Kurapika with a conflicted look, “One condition. You let him fight, and one-on-one.”

Nobunaga scoffed, “Fine. I’m still gonna kill him.”

Chrollo held onto him for a moment longer, before he let go entirely. He closed his eyes, stepping back away from Kurapika. Kurapika despaired to lose his protector, but he felt fiery defiance with the promise he’d be allowed to fight for his life. The other Spiders looked anxiously between Kurapika, Nobunaga, and Chrollo, Hisoka looking especially grim at the situation.

Kurapika straightened up, if he was going to die, he was going to take one more Spider with him. Nobunaga seemed to snarl at him, placing his hand on the hilt of the sword at his hip. Kurapika conjured his chains, feeling emboldened by how solid they felt. He stole a glance over at Chrollo, who’d taken a seat next to Machi and Feitan, and was watching coldly now.

Kurapika felt rage build in him, _he’s not going to help me. So I’m going to make him watch while I kill Nobunaga._

Kurapika snapped his hand out, the chains whipping out with a vicious crack as he did. Nobunaga crept forward in a fighting stance, and Kurapika could tell he was waiting for an opportunity to slash him in a single smooth movement. _That means he’s probably an enhancer._

The two sized each other up for a moment, before Kurapika launched a testy attack which Nobunaga easily dodged. Kurapika had expected that, he was watching for his body language and how he moved when he dodged. Nobunaga was faster than Uvo by a long shot, and Kurapika knew he would need to catch Nobunaga mid air to have a chance to catch him with Chain Jail.

He was relieved to see that Nobunaga was arrogant, dancing with large movements, and focusing only on guarding his body, not his movements. He fired a series of rapid but weak attacks, watching Nobunaga’s movements like a hawk while the other man worked his way closer. In close range, Nobunaga would have the advantage, and Kurapika could only assume Nobunaga was aware that Kurapika would try to counter that by moving back, _he’s going to set me up by forcing me backward._

Kurapika feigned into the trap, leaping clear of Nobunaga as he closed the space, but he trailed his right foot on the ground, allowing him to dodge and counter the moment Nobunaga twisted behind him and lashed out with his sword. Kurapika had been expecting laijutsu, and he was able to throw the trajectory of his swing off by wrapping one of the chains around his wrist and yanking it. He took a wide swing with his arm, concealing a chain from his broken left arm while he forced Nobunaga to doge into it. At the last moment, Nobunaga sensed the chain, and changed direction, launching at Kurapika with blinding speed.

Kurapika thought he’d dodged, but a moment after his feet hit the ground, sharp pain split through his left arm, and he felt heat pulse from the wound as he bled. He didn’t dare take his eyes off Nobunaga, but when he tried to move his left arm, the pain grew so sharp and intense that he screwed his face up at it, and his arm didn’t move. He guarded himself carefully as he examined the wound, realizing with a jolt that it had sliced through the deltoid muscle, rendering his arm limp. He ground his teeth, trying to force his arm to move, but Nobunaga launched a second attack, forcing him onto the defensive.

Again, Kurapika would’ve sworn he’d dodged the attack, but the blow landed in a diagonal slice through his trapezius. Kurapika struggled to lift his right arm, and he couldn’t swing with any strength. _I have to use my aura to control the chains…_

Nobunaga circled him as Kurapika forced his right arm to hold a defensive position while he used his nen to keep the chains in rapid rotation, creating a defensive barrier in front of him. Nobunaga eyed the chain warily, Kurapika hoped he wouldn’t notice that it was Chain Jail and that he would attempt to go straight through it. If Kurapika could seal his nen, he might be able to slow Nobunaga down enough to finish him off.

But Nobunaga feigned him, he lunged with a headstrong attack, but pivoted at the last moment, using a burst of strength from his legs, launching himself over Kurapika’s frontal defense, and delivering a blow with such speed that Kurapika didn’t even know what had happened until he hit the floor.

He refused to cry out, but he realized with gut-wrenching despair what had happened. Nobunaga had severed his spinal cord.

Kurapika groaned, trying to twist himself so he could face Nobunaga, but his wounded arms and paralyzed legs kept him face down. He felt Nobunaga press his foot the back of his head, forcing his face into the floor as he spoke, “So that’s it, huh? That’s all the chain bastard has to offer? This is the difference in power between you and me, and I don’t believe that you killed Uvo, but whatever happened that night,” Kurapika could hear his sword unsheathe, “You will pay for it today.”

In desperation, Kurapika forced himself free of Nobunaga’s foot to look over to Chrollo. He clung to those words, “I love you”, and prayed for Chrollo to save him. But Chrollo stared down at him, coldness in his eyes as he held perfectly still. Out of spite, Kurapika glared up at him, never looking away from those steel eyes, _you will watch me die._

 

Kurapika braced himself as he felt Nobunaga’s weight shift, indicating he was ready to deliver the lethal blow. But it never came.

 

Kurapika felt his weight lift, and he turned as much as he could. Shock gripped him, he looked up to see Hisoka standing over him, holding Nobunaga back from that final blow. Chrollo was watching him, an intense look in his eyes, “Hisoka?”

Hisoka tisked at Nobunaga, snapping the fingers on his free hand. As he did, Nobunaga grunted and was pulled violently away, slamming to the ground. Kurapika let himself gasp in surprise, Hisoka had saved his life.

Hisoka glared at Nobunaga from where he was stuck, presumably with Bungee Gum, “You have such a temper…”

Nobunaga glared at him, spitting with fury, “What the hell? You’re a traitor!”

Hisoka wagged his finger, still standing over Kurapika, “Hush and listen. Don’t you think it’s strange that the boss spared him for so long? Don’t you find it peculiar how protective he’s been, how merciful? Does the boss ever show mercy to anyone outside of the Troupe? Use your head, however dense it may be. Don’t you see what the boss is doing?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, looking over at Chrollo in his confusion. Chrollo narrowed his eyes for a moment, but they ignited with the light of understanding a heartbeat later.

Hisoka continued while Nobunaga cursed at him, “It’s obvious, don’t you think? The boss sees value in Kurapika. He wants him to join the Troupe. We’re already two members down, we need new allies. And he was strong enough to kill Uvo, he’s a natural candidate. This whole game he’s been playing, it’s to break Kurapika down and reshape him into something we can use. And it was working until you barged in and ruined his plan because your temper clouded your judgement, and you lost faith in your leader, who’s never before let you down. How unfortunate.”

Chrollo stood up now, watching Nobunaga’s expression go from confusion to horror as Hisoka backed off and understanding set in. Chrollo gestured to Machi, “Can you help him?”

Machi hummed, examining Kurapika carefully, “I think so. The muscles and ligaments and tendons and most nerves are easy, but spinal cords are always challenging. Fortunately, it’s a perfectly clean cut, so yeah, I can probably heal him.”

Chrollo gave her a curt nod, “Please do.”

Kurapika was a whirlwind of confusion and anger, feeling betrayal and gratitude more intense than he could ever recall. Now that the danger was passed, he felt tears threatening at how distraught he felt, knowing how badly injured he’d been. Machi straightened him out, and had already begun working her Nen Stitches through the gaping wound in his back. He felt ice cold as she worked, realizing he was lying in a pool of his own blood. Machi worked swiftly and cleanly, but Kurapika grew colder by the second, and the world felt heavier and heavier. He stole a last, hazy look up towards Chrollo, who was saying something to Nobunaga, his body language betraying his anger.

 

…

 

Kurapika woke slowly, he still felt cold. He began to recall the day before, feeling a profound soreness in his arms though he found quickly he could move them again. With a deep nervousness, he tentatively tried to move one of his legs, and he felt sick with relief when he realized it moved with relative ease.

_Thank God!_ Kurapika let out a shuddering sigh as he realized Machi’s Nen Stitches had worked. He sat up carefully, stiff and sore, but relatively pain free. He looked around the room, noticing Chrollo leaned against the wall, asleep. All the betrayal he felt from the day before came rushing back to him as he looked at Chrollo resting there, _it was all a game… and I played right into it. I let myself believe, even just for a second, and like a snake, he bit me for it._

Wrapped up in his mutinous thoughts, Kurapika didn’t notice that Hisoka had slipped into the room. He stepped softly and quietly, making a dramatic point to step over the sleeping Chrollo’s extended legs. He sauntered over to Kurapika with a flirty look, sitting beside him on the bed. For a moment, he sat with an amused look, staring at Chrollo, then he turned back to Kurapika with a smile, “You know, he watched over you all night, fussing like a mother hen. He refused to leave your bedside.”

Kurapika felt his mood grow even fouler, “He can go to hell where he belongs for all I care.”

Hisoka puffed his lip out, “Now, don’t be so harsh. I only said what I said to buy you some time.”

Kurapika scowled, “Why would you do that?”

Hisoka gave him a wink, “Because I like you. No other reason.”

Kurapika squirmed, “Even if that’s true,” Kurapika shot a nasty look down at Chrollo, aware that he’d been awakened by their voices though he still pretended to sleep, “everything you said, it’s true, isn’t it? That’s exactly what he’s playing at, gain my trust and break me down. But it won’t work, I’ll never trust him as anything more than a filthy, scum bag murderer who could never love anyone but himself.”

Chrollo didn’t move, but Hisoka made a face at his intensity, “I don’t really know, his motives, that is. But you seem to have your heart set, just thought you should know I pulled yesterday’s speech out of my ass.”

Hisoka shrugged, getting up to leave, as he passed Chrollo, he gave him an amused snort, “Such a lousy actor…”

 

Hisoka left them alone, and Chrollo stirred once he’d gone. Kurapika glared at him, “Get out.”

Chrollo rubbed his eyes, “You’re in a foul mood.”

Kurapika grabbed the nearest stone and hurled it at him, though Chrollo dodged it easily, “Calm down, let’s talk.”

Kurapika felt his old fury churn again, “No. I know what your game is, and I refuse. You should go ahead and kill me and get it over with because I’ll never break.”

Chrollo sighed, coming to sit next to Kurapika on the bed, “I’m not going to kill you. My hand got called yesterday, I didn’t anticipate my number one turning on me with such a vengeance. I couldn’t do anything to help you, except give you a chance the fend for yourself. So that’s what I did.”

Kurapika scoffed at him, “But it’s true, isn’t it? You only show me ‘kindness’ because you want to break me.”

Chrollo didn’t answer for a long while, “Does it matter? To you, that is?”

Kurapika felt himself shaking in anger, “Yes, it does!”

Chrollo looked over at him, “Why?”

Kurapika couldn’t stop himself, “Maybe because you told me you loved me?”

Chrollo’s eyes widened with shock at that, all previous tiredness in them banished in an instant, “What?”

Kurapika burned in fury and embarrassment that he’d let that slip, “What are you asking me for? You’re the one who said it!”

Chrollo looked away, that look of shock still on his face as Kurapika continued, “It doesn’t matter anyway, I’m not stupid. I know you can’t possibly feel love. I just think it’s pathetic that you can even let those words pass your wretched, lying lips.”

Chrollo visibly flinched, though Kurapika had a hard time believing it was genuine, “You don’t think someone like me could ever feel love?”

Kurapika had to refrain himself from slapping him, “No, I don’t. I don’t think you could feel love, compassion, remorse, empathy, **anything** that makes a human what we are.”

Chrollo’s eyes grew very dark, “I think you’re wrong… I believe the only way a monster like me can be made is if he’s born feeling love more intensely than anyone else. It’s because someone like me once loved so passionately, so intensely and without limits, that a monster with ice in his veins can exist. If man never felt love, he would never know hatred, wrath, vengeance. He would know nothing, nothing at all, if not for love.”

Kurapika froze, he didn’t really know what to say to that, “If you believe that, then was it true? What you said to me?”

Chrollo stared at the ground, “I don’t know. Maybe.”

Kurapika snapped, slapping him hard, “ ‘ ** _Maybe_** ’?”

Chrollo winced, “I’m sorry.”

Kurapika backed off, surprised to hear an apology, “It doesn’t matter. I told you, I would gladly die before joining the Troupe.”

Chrollo sighed, “I know. I already figured that much.”

Kurapika looked away, “Then why not kill me?”

Chrollo’s brows furrowed, “Because I don’t want to.”

Kurapika felt his energy draining, “Why?”

Chrollo paused for a long moment, his voice a whisper as he replied, “I guess it’s because it’s true, what I said to you.”

Kurapika swallowed hard, “It’s true?”

Chrollo stood up suddenly, “I guess so.”

Kurapika stared after him as he left the room without saying anything more, the words ringing in his mind again and again.

 

**_I guess it’s because it’s true._ **


	10. Catharsis

            Chrollo didn’t return for a few days, leaving Kurapika to melt in his own frustrations. Hisoka stopped by regularly, and though Kurapika was grateful to have someone to talk to be able to vent his annoyance, he wished it were anyone besides the cheeky Hisoka. Machi had also appeared on occasion to check how he was healing, per Chrollo’s request as he understood it.

Hisoka sauntered in at his usual time, bringing a bag of take-out food as he had been. He set it down next to the bed and sat with Kurapika like he’d been doing in the four or so days that Chrollo had been gone for.

Hisoka was quiet for a moment while Kurapika fished through the bag and pulled out a small box of Chinese food. Eventually, Hisoka spoke as he shuffled his cards, so skilled by now that Kurapika swore he could shuffle in his sleep, “You hurt his feelings, you know.”

He gave Kurapika, who just shoved food into face, a cheeky look, “Who? Chrollo?”

Hisoka nodded, “Mhm.”

Kurapika scoffed, “Didn’t know he had any feelings to begin with.”

Hisoka pouted at him, “You’re so harsh to him.”

Kurapika shrugged, “Has he cried my river yet? Because if not, I don’t really see how that’s my problem.”

Hisoka touched his finger to his cheek with a frown, gesturing a tear falling, “So mean. You know he stormed out of here all flustered. Took Nobunaga with him to blow off some steam, I guess. You’re really under his skin, that man’s hide is thicker and tougher than a rhino’s and yet you should’ve seen his face as he left.”

Kurapika gave him the most disinterested look he could manage, forcing every last ounce of sarcasm he had into his voice, “I’m absolutely heartbroken, devasted I tell you, absolutely devastated.”

Hisoka giggled, “And I can see why. I bet he’s never faced someone as fiery as you.”

Kurapika snorted, not daring to admit how his will had been fluctuating lately, and changing the subject, “You said he left with Nobunaga?”

Hisoka nodded, “That’s right. Why?”

Kurapika gave him a suspicious look, “Do you think they’ll fight?”

Hisoka gave an exasperated sight, “Certainly not. You should have seen the pathetic look on Nobunaga’s face when Chrollo approached him. I was sure he’d wet himself, but Chrollo is too patient with the Troupe, he’d never break his own rule and harm them.”

Kurapika grunted, “That’s a shame. Why are you here?”

Hisoka gave him a bemused look, “What do you mean?”

Kurapika was feeling more daring than usual, “I mean, isn’t this the exact opportunity you’ve been waiting for? That’s why you sold them out, isn’t it?”

Hisoka pursed his lips, “Hey, now, don’t be so blunt. I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about.”

Kurapika eyed him for a moment, Hisoka made it clear he wasn’t being sincere when he said that, “So, why not go after them? You’re always up to some mischief or another, right? They wouldn’t bat an eye if you disappeared now.”

Hisoka hummed, “You’re probably right. But you put the boss so on edge I wouldn’t stand a chance of getting within a hundred yards of him. I ought to slug you for that.”

Kurapika shrugged at him, “I’m the only reason he left in the first place, so no harm no foul.”

Hisoka mused for a moment, “I suppose that’s true. By that way, your powers, what’s going on with them? You were plenty fired up against Nobunaga, but you looked sluggish and clumsy almost. Your eyes were sharp and alert, watching everything he did so critically, but you were too slow to do anything with the information you were getting. I thought your eyes granted you the Specialist ability to use all nen types?”

Kurapika eyed him, not too happy that Hisoka knew that much, “Yeah, but only techniques I’ve mastered.”

Hisoka watched him like a hawk, “And you haven’t mastered a single Enhancer, Emitter, or Transmuter technique? And yet you took down Uvo, the bruiser of the whole Troupe?”

Kurapika sighed, Hisoka wasn’t going to let it go, “I’ve been using Emperor Time too much. The more I use it, the stronger the blowback, and the longer it takes to recover my aura. The less compatible a nen type is, the greater strain it puts on my body and aura. When I fought Nobunaga, my conjuration was still plenty strong, and my Manipulation wasn’t too weak, but the other nen types afforded by my Emperor Time are virtually nonexistent right now.”

Hisoka tipped his head thoughtfully, “I’m curious, what’s been making you utilize Emperor Time so much?”

Kurapika wasn’t about to tell him the whole truth, “I wasn’t fully recovered from my fight with Uvo when I came here. A normal person’s aura will recover within a week, a day or two using Zetsu efficiently. But even using Zetsu, if I overexert my aura using incompatible abilities like I did against Uvo, it takes at least a month. In that time, I used Emperor Time for Enhancer nen repeatedly to heal, and shaky as it was, I utilized Enhancer and Emission nen to fight Chrollo, in addition to my Conjuration and Manipulation. Enhancer for speed and defense against Chrollo’s power, Emission to help me detect his movements using En before he could strike. The disorganization I was struggling with in that fight made my aura less potent, but drained it at an incredibly higher rate. As it stands, I’d say it would’ve taken about six months for my aura to completely recover. And when I tried to use it against Nobunaga, I didn’t have enough aura to manage it. So I could use Manipulation weakly, Conjuration relatively well, and none of the other types.”

Hisoka looked a bit surprised, “Someone’s an open book. It’s strange, the boss has a similar ability to utilize all nen types, but the blowback from using incompatible nen types is mild in his case. Even draining himself completely, like he did against the Zoldycks a while back, he recovers in about two days,” Hisoka winked at him, “Less, of course, if he has a little canary to heal his wounds.”

Kurapika glared at him, not sure how to react to hearing that nickname from Hisoka, whether it was coincidence or he knew something, “What’s the difference, between our abilities I mean?”

Hisoka hummed, “I’m not really sure, honestly. Perhaps it has to do with the fact the boss has placed more conditions over his abilities, the physical drawback may be less because the conditional drawbacks and limitations are far greater. But that’s just a guess, I haven’t been here that long, and though the boss has obvious faith in my abilities, he doesn’t trust me yet. He’s a cautious man, I didn’t even know all the conditions he had to meet to steal someone’s nen until he told you and Machi explained it to me later that day. Even then, I’m not sure that’s really all of it. But who knows, the man is an enigma.”

Hisoka swiped his tongue over his lips as he said that last line, making Kurapika cringe hard, “Do you have any idea when he’ll be back?”

Hisoka gave him a playfully look, “Oh? Can’t wait to see him again, is that it?”

Kurapika scoffed, “Hardly. I’m enjoying my peace. I wouldn’t mind if he never came back.”

Hisoka snickered at him, “I wouldn’t believe that if I was paid to. You miss him, that’s normal. Stockholm Syndrome, something like that, right? You’ve been stuck here for a couple months now with him being more or less your only human contact until now. I think that’s pretty natural, getting attached to him. He is… so wonderfully charming. So charismatic and attractive.”

Kurapika punched him on the shoulder, “Do **not** project onto me.”

Hisoka gave a good-natured laugh, “Maybe you’re right, either way, I think he should be back soon. Tonight, or tomorrow morning, depending on if he’s tired, he might stop to rest.”

As Hisoka stood up to leave, Kurapika spoke to him, “Do you know what he went to do?”

Hisoka looked back at him, thinking for a moment, “I’m not entirely sure, he mentioned he wanted to unwind and talk it out with Nobunaga, but that’s sufficiently vague. I imagine they probably went to cause a little mayhem, minor projects like stealing some precious jewelry or something like that. Just something to mend their rapport a little.”

Kurapika snorted, “Something minor, huh? You know, most thieves couldn’t even pull that off.”

Hisoka hummed in amusement, “They are definitely not most thieves. It’s a walk in the park to the boss, something he would do to relieve his frustrations and unwind. He’d take some extra time just to get to talking with Nobunaga, that’s how he does things. I’m convinced that Chrollo can talk his way out of anything, and smooth over the worst of disputes with ease.”

Kurapika could believe that, “Anyway, thanks for the food.”

Hisoka gave him a smile, “And for the free therapy?”

Kurapika eyed him, “Sure, whatever.”

Hisoka gave him a wave, “Look forward to tonight, I’m sure the boss is gonna have a lot to settle with you.”

Kurapika watched him go in silence, wondering what he’d meant by his words. A shiver ran down his newly healed spine as he mulled it over, _that could either be really good, or really, really bad_.

 

…

 

Machi stopped by one last time that evening. She never shared words with Kurapika, though she occasionally spoke to herself while she looked over the places where his wounds had once been. Hisoka had explained to him that while Machi’s ability was incredible, capable of reconnecting muscles, bones, even nerves, and forming a powerful bond that allowed any physical injury to heal as if it had never happened in the first place, it did take time. The Nen Stitches held everything together perfectly, but the body still had to be functioning enough to make its own repairs. If it couldn’t, the Nen Stitches would eventually fade, leaving whatever remained of the wound. And if someone overexerted themselves, they could easily tear the Nen Stitches and reopen the wound. In Kurapika’s case, Machi had to pay particularly close attention to the spinal cord injury he’d received from Nobunaga to assure that his body was actually healing the injury, and that Kurapika wouldn’t find himself paralyzed once her nen faded from his body.

With great relief to Kurapika, Machi had commented to herself the day before that it had healed fine. She’d still come to check today, but Kurapika had a feeling that she only did that so Chrollo wouldn’t hassle her about it.

Looking back, Kurapika had spent some time wondering if the first time Nobunaga had slashed him across his back hadn’t been a warning about what was to come. The first wound had hurt like hell, cutting clean through the supporting muscles of his back, but it had ultimately been a minor injury. This time, however, Nobunaga had gone clean through his spine, rendering him completely helpless. Kurapika thought that was far worse than the wound itself, and he could only assume Nobunaga had done it for that reason.

 

Now Kurapika was laying on his side, staring at the wall and daydreaming about how good his life had been in the short time he’d spent with Gon, Killua, and Leorio. He’d had something good, he could’ve traveled the world on a grand adventure with the greatest friends he’d ever known. But he had given that up to pursue revenge. At the time, it had been easy, it was all he really wanted in his life, but now, lying there alone in the cold room, bound by his contract with Chrollo and painfully aware that he was never going to leave this place alive, he had never felt such profound loneliness. He felt utterly empty inside, and his only comfort had become daydreaming and reminiscing about what could’ve been instead, living vicariously in his memories and imagination. Sometimes his mind got to wondering what those three were up to now. Chrollo had made it clear that they couldn’t save him, and Kurapika couldn’t imagine why they would in the first place. They had something good, and all Kurapika had brought them was trouble and pain, pushing them away and treating them as lesser in his pursuit of absolute vengeance. And now, he would give anything to go back and change his decision. He felt so lost, so confused about what to do after he’d learned the truth about his clans’ massacre. Fury still burned in him that the Spiders had taken such a heinous job, but the root of his hatred had shifted from them to the mafia. But he’d bound himself to revenge on the Spiders, and though part of him still wanted that, he knew even if by some miracle he got his revenge on them, he could never be relieved of this pain inside of him. Even if he killed them, he would never be able to kill the object of his rage, and he would die knowing that. He was going to die alone, with this pain inside of him.

 

And that scared him.

 

He’d been lost in his waking dream when some commotion from the main hall pulled him from it. It wasn’t a huge commotion, and Kurapika guessed Chrollo and Nobunaga had returned. He was feeling miserable, wallowing in self pity and regret. Sinking lower into the bed, he pulled the blanket up over himself, curling up and facing the wall, pretending to be asleep in the hopes that when Chrollo inevitably came to check on him, he would leave him undisturbed.

It had taken so long for Chrollo to conclude his discussion with whoever was in the main hall that Kurapika had actually begun falling asleep when approaching footsteps woke him. He held still, keeping his breathing deep and making quiet noises as though he were softly snoring. The wind outside howled through the cracks in the walls and around the window sills as the door creaked open, announcing Chrollo’s return.

For a long moment, Kurapika could feel him lingering, and he didn’t know what to expect from the man. Would he be angry? After all, Kurapika had refused to join the Spiders before sending Chrollo off with a stinging slap, and he couldn’t imagine someone as proud and strong as Chrollo taking kindly to that.

Kurapika heard the soft scuff of a shoe as Chrollo finally approached him. He felt his hand gently run over his shoulder and upper arm, and he was admittedly relieved to see that Chrollo was apparently not angry at him. Chrollo gave his shoulder a soft squeeze and gentle pat before he moved away.

Kurapika was just about to relax when he was struck with an incredible force. He shot upright with a heavy grunt, whipping around to glare at Chrollo who was holding a pillow in one hand.

Kurapika gaped at him, “Did you just hit me with that?”

Chrollo looked down it, rather expressionless, “Yeah.”

Kurapika blinked at him, “How did you get that much force into a pillow?”

Chrollo shrugged, “I just hit you as hard as I could with it.”

Kurapika stared at him incredulously for a moment, “Why?”

Chrollo set the pillow down, coming to sit at the foot of the bed, “Because I knew you were awake and ignoring me.”

Kurapika smoothed his frizzy hair down, “So you just hit me with the first thing you found?”

Chrollo looked over at him, still expressionless, “Pretty much.”

Kurapika sighed, for a moment he’d been distracted by how startled he was. But now, his misery had caught up to him, and he didn’t have the energy or the drive to continue being upset by Chrollo’s feather-filled assault. He laid back down, facing away from Chrollo and pulling the blankets back up without sparing the other man another word.

Chrollo said nothing for a long while, but eventually, his silky voice broke through the howling wind, “You’re incredibly depressed.”

Kurapika didn’t respond to him, so he went on, “You know how you can feel someone’s bloodlust? Well, a more sensitive person can feel other things as well. Like right now, you have such a profound air of sadness pouring off of you that it’s overwhelming.”

Kurapika took his time replying, “So what?”

Chrollo moved closer, resting his hand on Kurapika, “So, what’s wrong? You’ve never been this depressed before. Has something happened while I was away?”

Kurapika shrugged his hand off, though Chrollo replaced it a moment later, “Nothing happened. Why does it concern you anyway?”

Chrollo ran his hand over him in a comforting motion, “It doesn’t, I suppose. But I still want to know.”

Kurapika stirred a bit, “Why?”

Chrollo took a long pause, “Because I don’t like seeing you like this. You’re wallowing in grief and pain, you look completely empty inside and I don’t want you to feel that way.”

Kurapika scoffed weakly at him, “And you suddenly care about me, is that it?”

Chrollo stroked his face delicately, clearing the hair from his eyes as he spoke, “I don’t know how sudden it really is, but what I do know is that every time I touch you I can feel some of the worst of that agony start to melt away, just a little bit. So I ask you, is there anything I can do to help you?”

Kurapika was feeling completely drained emotionally, “No. There’s nothing you can do for me. And I have nothing more to say to you.”

Chrollo let out a heavy sigh, but he sat quietly for a long while before replying, “I don’t think that’s true. I think you have more to say to me now than you ever had before, and I think it’s eating you from the inside out. If you have something to say to me, I’ll listen.”

Kurapika felt suddenly raw, as if he was going to cry. But he would never sink so low as to cry in front of Chrollo, “I have nothing to say to you.”

Chrollo ran his finger gently under Kurapika’s eye, as if he sensed exactly what Kurapika was feeling, “You’re angry with me. You feel betrayed and confused. But more than anything, you feel this yawning abyss of empty loneliness swallowing you up inside.”

Kurapika shivered, it was as though Chrollo was reading his mind like a page from one of his books, “You’re right. There’s still nothing you, or anyone, can do about it.”

Chrollo sighed, “I bet Gon could do something about it.”

Kurapika felt hot, protective anger burn within him, “Leave him out of this!”

Chrollo soothed him with a gentle squeeze over the taut muscles in his shoulder, “Relax. I wasn’t thinking anything spiteful. I was just musing.”

Kurapika cooled off some, “Don’t involve him in any of this. I’m here by my own decisions. Don’t you ever drag him into this.”

Chrollo gave him another squeeze, “I wasn’t planning to. I was just wondering if that’s what’s eating you up inside. Regret and longing to be back with your friends, wishing you’d never set foot here to begin with. You sacrificed everything for them, and now you have no one, and nothing. You’re utterly alone, and you will be until you die. Is that what you’re thinking?”

Kurapika felt hot emotion well up inside of him, but he choked it down, “That’s right. Looks like you’ve got it all figured out.”

Chrollo reached around him as though to pull him closer, but Kurapika resisted, making him sigh, “It doesn’t have to be that way.”

Kurapika scowled, “I’m not stupid enough to trust you again. I know I’m never leaving this place.”

Chrollo’s face betrayed a seemingly genuine sadness at that, “I can’t stand to see you so resigned, so defeated.”

Kurapika kept his eyes diverted, “You’ll forgive me that I can’t feel sorry for you about that.”

Chrollo pulled him again, more strength in his arm this time as Kurapika gave in and allowed himself to be pulled into an embrace, “Of course I can forgive you. I have a proposition.”

Kurapika slumped against him, resting his chin over Chrollo’s shoulder and making a pained face now that Chrollo couldn’t see it, “I’m not interested.”

Chrollo rubbed his back with comforting firmness, going on despite Kurapika’s protest, “You say you can’t trust me again. So how about I show you that I trust you instead?”

Kurapika felt treacherous curiosity begin to spark in him, “What are you talking about.”

Chrollo drew back a bit making Kurapika sharply aware of the cold draft that passed between them where Chrollo’s warmth had been. Chrollo gazed into his eyes for a moment, and Kurapika had to battle the urge to look away should Chrollo see right into his heart. After a moment, he tipped Kurapika’s head back, gently pressing their lips together. Kurapika wanted to resist him, to be angry at him for kissing him when he was feeling so vulnerable. But he couldn’t. Chrollo was incredibly gentle, it wasn’t a rough, powerful kiss like the ones he’d given before, it was slow and delicate, and it made all of Kurapika’s hair stand on end to feel the sweetness of it.

The warmth that drowned the worst of his sorrows energized him some, and he gave into it, wrapping his arms over Chrollo’s shoulders and relaxing into the tender kiss. Chrollo leaned him back, carefully resting his weight on him. Kurapika felt drowned in warmth, not the intense heat like he felt in their more lustful moments, but a soothing, fortifying warmth that spread through him, banishing the frigid abyss of loneliness that had opened inside his heart.

Chrollo broke the kiss, and lifted himself off Kurapika a bit, “I’ll be right back.”

Kurapika despaired at that, feeling both the freezing air and his icy emotions wash over him, “Don’t leave.”

Chrollo gazed down at him with a soft expression, “I won’t leave you again. I’m just going to grab something, I’ll be right back.”

Kurapika still shivered violently as Chrollo’s warmth disappeared, despite his comforting words. Kurapika felt livelier now, the pain inside not completely vanquished, but it had dulled enough that some of his energy returned. He watched the door with vigilance, waiting for Chrollo to come back to him.

 

When he did, he inspired a glare from Kurapika, “Is this really your idea of helping?”

Chrollo hushed him, “Let me explain-”

Kurapika felt incredulous, “Explain what? You think tying me up again is the solution?”

Chrollo set the rope he’d brought with him down, “I’m not tying you up again, relax.”

Kurapika blinked at him, “Then what?...”

Chrollo smiled a bit, “You are.”

Kurapika shook his head, “I’m what?”

Chrollo sighed, looking amused, “You’re tying me up. I told you, I want to show you that I trust you. So whatever you do to me, I will accept.”

Kurapika wanted to be angry, but truthfully, he felt emboldened at that idea, “What are the rules?”

Chrollo shook his head, “No rules. You can kill me if you so desire. I give you permission to. I’m purely trusting that you won’t.”

Kurapika was taken aback by that, “You’re so dramatic.”

Chrollo smiled, “You’re probably right, but I’m serious. You have absolute free reign. I want you to take all of that anger, all of that frustration and betrayal and unleash it on me. Everything that you’re holding in, everything that you’re trying to suppress, I want you to release it all. I’ll accept every last drop of it.”

Kurapika shivered, both at his words, and at the mounting emotions within him, aware that his eyes had ignited and were now burning scarlet red, “Don’t regret that decision.”

Chrollo hummed, “I won’t. Because I’ve chosen to trust you, and I could never regret that.”

Kurapika was moved by that, either Chrollo was being sincere, or he was the greatest actor the world had ever known. Regardless, Kurapika knew Chrollo was right to trust in him, he couldn’t hurt him again as he had before. It had sickened him to hear the crack of the whip, to see Chrollo’s agonized face, and to smell the blood that poured profusely from the wounds Kurapika had given him. He was about to decline and tell Chrollo it was unnecessary since he couldn’t bring himself to hurt him again when he remembered something with a jolt.

 

**_I can break you faster with pleasure than with pain._ **

****

That was the perfect solution, and it got Kurapika fired up just to think about it. Chrollo was watching him intently, certainly having picked up on Kurapika’s mood swing.

He gazed into Kurapika’s eyes, seeming completely entranced by their scarlet hue, “I want to tell you something before we start.”

Kurapika paused what he was doing, “What is it?”

There was no humor, only sincerity in Chrollo’s eyes as he spoke, “You think I chose the Troupe over you, isn’t that right?”

Kurapika froze in confusion, “Of course. That’s exactly what you did.”

Kurapika tried to sound neutral and matter-of-fact, but internally, it still stung him to think about it. Chrollo continued, interrupting his thoughts, “That’s not true.”

Kurapika gave him a puzzled look, so he went on, “To me, the Troupe is more important than anything else. That means that the Troupe is more important to me than I am to myself. I live my life for the good of the Spider, and if I were to lose that, I would certainly end myself in that same instant. That means that no matter what I want, I will always put the survival of the Troupe first.”

Kurapika stared at him in shock, “Why are you telling me?”

Chrollo stared back at him, intensity in his dark grey eyes, “Because I want you to know this fact; back there, I wanted to fight Nobunaga on your behalf. I wanted to protect you. My desire to save you was greater than my loyalty to my number one, I chose you over him. But if I had acted on that desire, it would’ve torn the Troupe apart in a heartbeat. So I threw away my desire, and tried to throw you a lifeline that you could use. Then I just prayed that you’d find a way to fend for yourself, and I felt hopelessly despaired when you couldn’t. The truth is, I didn’t choose the Troupe over you, I chose the Troupe over myself.”

Kurapika was frozen in shock, just staring back at Chrollo for a long time before he could find the words, “Is that true?”

Chrollo nodded, “Yes, it’s true.”

Hearing that made Kurapika’s decision more certain that it had ever been before, “I see. In that case, I need you to bring me a few more things, then we can get started. And you’ll see exactly how well you placed your trust in me.”

Chrollo gave him a bemused look, but as Kurapika named his demands, that bemused look turned into a very wicked smile, and Chrollo’s eyes burned with excitement.

 

…

 

Chrollo had returned with everything Kurapika had requested, and now he stood looking over the objects he’d brought with fierce interest, “This should be fun.”

Kurapika snorted, his mood had lifted incredibly since Chrollo’s return, and though he still held on to his anger, he knew that by the end of the night, none of it would remain, “Interesting that you think of this as fun,”

Chrollo smiled at him, “Don’t lie, I can see it in those gorgeous eyes of yours. You can’t wait for this.”

Kurapika finished untangling the rope, nodding to Chrollo as a signal for him to strip, “Yes. But that’s me, I’m surprised that **you** are finding this fun.”

Chrollo unfastened his signature coat, humming as he did, “I think you’re going to learn a lot about me tonight. I suspect I’ll probably be learning a thing or two about you as well.”

Kurapika felt excited by that prospect in spite of himself, keeping his eyes on Chrollo as he continued to undress. Chrollo caught his eye, and met his watchful gaze confidently.

When he’d finished, Kurapika took the rope, repeating the process to bind his hands to the ceiling rafter. This time, however, he spent extra time to tie the ropes over the entirety of his body, lacing intricate patterns as he went. Chrollo was transfixed on him as he worked, tying a diamond pattern down his abdomen before separating two lines of rope and wrapping them once around each thigh, and a final knot at his ankles, leaving a small loop at each foot. It had taken quite some time, but Chrollo had spared no complaints as he stood there, his heels forced off the ground.

Kurapika stepped back with a sigh, admiring his work, and how well Chrollo’s lean but powerfully muscled frame wore it. He was stretched t full length and Kurapika could see that his shoulders and chest were broad and well-muscled while his waist was surprisingly slim. His abdominal muscles were defined, and Kurapika was painfully aware that his v-line was deep and sharp. Kurapika had tied a shorter rope around his waist like a belt, and it helped to highlight the flare in Chrollo’s hips, something Kurapika hadn’t taken note of before, a feature usually swallowed up and lost beneath Chrollo’s coat. Now, looking him over, Kurapika thought that was a real shame.

Taking the cat o’ nine tail in his hand, Kurapika twirled it, admiring the way the leather tails spread like a flower before settling back down. Chrollo eyed him as he did, though not an ounce of fear glittered in his eyes.

Kurapika circled behind him, he had purposefully left his back as exposed as possible, and now he was left to stare right at the spider tattoo that stretched across his skin.

Chrollo’s words rang in his mind, _‘This one’s meant to sting, not lash.’_

Kurapika gave him no warning as he brought the whip hard across his back. He’d felt what the small black leather straps could do, and he knew Chrollo would be able to handle it.

Chrollo let out a sharp gasp, the muscles in his back rippling in the wake of the contact, “A little warning next time?”

Kurapika didn’t miss the weight of arousal in Chrollo’s voice, and he struck him hard once again without replying to his request for a heads up. Each blow was aimed across that tattoo, but Kurapika was free to enjoy the way his skin reddened in his wake, knowing that no real injury was being given to Chrollo this time. The way Chrollo let out soft moans and gasps only furthered his desire to continue to whip him.

Kurapika remembered the point of doing this, and he allowed his frustration and anger to rise in him, lashing Chrollo as hard as he could, and watching as the stipple pattern appeared across his back as tiny capillaries broke beneath his skin.

Chrollo let out a desperate sound when Kurapika took a moment away from whipping him, “You really have it out for me right now, don’t you?”

Kurapika lashed him again, letting his anger drive his movements, “You have no idea how furious I am at you.”

Chrollo let out a throaty groan, “You’re right, I don’t. So please, show me exactly how angry you are.”

Kurapika realized that more than anything, Chrollo was becoming desperately turned on by the pain of the whip. He drew his arm back, delivering more vicious blows and watching the way Chrollo’s body squirmed in the ropes.

Eventually, his arm grew tired, and he pressed himself against Chrollo, running his fingers gently over the painfully red skin of his back. Chrollo released a low, erotic moan as he did that, prompting Kurapika to abandon the whip in favor of his hand as he struck the center of the tattoo hard.

Chrollo let out a sharp moan, but when Kurapika stepped around in front of him, he could see only arousal reflected on his face. He gave him a look, lashing his abdomen once with the whip, “Sadomasochism is rare, you know.”

Chrollo’s eyes were blackened with lust, and his breath came in soft pants, “Is that so?”

Kurapika whipped the inside of one of his thighs hard and without warning, causing Chrollo to jerk in his restraints, looking more painfully aroused than Kurapika had seen him yet. He taunted his thighs with a few more strikes, watching the way Chrollo’s face twisted in sick pleasure each time.

When Chrollo was gasping for breath, Kurapika paused. He stepped close to him, watching the way Chrollo gave him the slightest smirk, his eyes glazed in a mix of excitement and mild pain. Kurapika ran his hands down the length of Chrollo’s sides, taking in the curve of his ribs down through his hips. As he brought his hands back up, he ran them in a feathery fashion over Chrollo’s chest, eliciting a soft sigh from the bound man.

His fingers teased Chrollo’s nipples, earning him soft moans as he did. He pinched Chrollo hard, admiring the way he shamelessly cried out, “You’re a lot more sensitive than I would’ve thought.”

Chrollo’s body jerked as he continued teasing him, “I suppose you’re about to learn, I’m very sensitive in certain places.”

Kurapika looked up at him, briefly curious if Chrollo might even be ticklish, “Is that right?”

Chrollo gazed down at him from behind long, black eyelashes, “Find out for yourself.”

Kurapika wasn’t about to deny that offer, and trailed kisses against his chest before running his tongue lightly over Chrollo’s nipple. He flicked his tongue playfully, watching the way Chrollo’s face screwed up with pleasure and feeling the way his hips jerked with excitement. Kurapika sucked hard on his nipple, intending to leave a long-lasting mark as he repeatedly sucked and released, finding himself turned on by the way Chrollo let out strained breaths as he did so. When he pulled back, he was pleased to see the skin was a dark reddish color, signaling that Chrollo would have a reminder of this night for at least a week to come. He ran his tongue in circles over the reddened skin, watching Chrollo’s face sink into pleasant relaxation as he did. He waited for the moment Chrollo closed his eyes to enjoy the sensations, then he bit down hard.

Chrollo cried out, his body tensing as his loud moan feel away to a throaty growl, his eyes betraying the way the pain turned him on. Kurapika scissored his teeth, making Chrollo contort his face in the mix of pain and pleasure he derived from that. Releasing his teeth, Kurapika kissed the tormented skin gently, soothing it a bit before repeating the process on the other nipple and marveling at the fact that this one was even more sensitive.

Kurapika stepped back, beginning to take his own clothes off as he admired the intense bruising over Chrollo’s nipples, so drastically emphasized by the man’s pale skin.

Kurapika dropped the last of his clothes before shifting through the things he’d requested Chrollo bring. He didn’t want to know where he kept these things, the rope was reasonable enough, it was standard rope after all, but the numerous sex-related objects were another story. He could only trust that Chrollo was sincere when he said everything was completely new.

Kurapika found what he was looking for, and he sauntered back towards Chrollo, who couldn’t hide his smile as he stared at Kurapika’s hands, “You’re a lot kinkier than I expected.”

Kurapika huffed at him, “I’m just getting started.”

Chrollo’s eyelids lowered with the lust he felt, but his smile remained as Kurapika took a firm hold over his erection and carefully eased him into a cock ring, cinching it a little extra tight over the base of his cock. Chrollo let out something that sounded like a moan, looking greatly pleased to be in his position. Kurapika picked up a bottle of massage oil, pouring it into his palm before coming to stand directly in front of Chrollo again.

Chrollo’s lips quivered, and he bit his bottom lip in anticipation as Kurapika pressed their hips together, rubbing the oil over both of them. Chrollo’s breaths came in short, light gasps as he admired the way they were flush against one another, Kurapika’s slender, long fingers brushing over his tip and making him jerk with desire for more of those soft but strong hands.

Kurapika took a hold of both of them, squeezing tightly until Chrollo whined at him, “You seemed to really like this last time.”

Chrollo huffed, furrowing his brows in pleasure and excitement, “I seemed to remember this drove us both crazy.”

He was right, but Kurapika was in control this time, and no sense of self-inflicted pleasure was going to outweigh his stubbornness. He ran his thumb in firm circles over their tips, watching the way Chrollo melted almost instantly to his touch. He continued focusing there until Chrollo was fully erect, gripping them both tightly and working their full lengths until Chrollo’s legs trembled desperately. He made no effort to hide his pleasure as he tipped his head back and allowed himself to moan freely every time Kurapika did something exceptionally good to him.

Kurapika worked them a little faster, thrusting his hips to meet each stroke of his hand and gauging Chrollo’s reactions as the bound man grew tense with ecstasy. Kurapika squeezed tighter still, relying on the oil to keep the movement smooth as they slid against each other in his grip. The pleasure was mind-numbing, but while Chrollo had given himself up to the sensations, Kurapika was determined to maintain control this time. He still had a lot of frustration to take out on this man before he’d be satisfied.

When Chrollo looked incredibly close to coming, Kurapika stopped suddenly, earning him a pitiful whine as he did. He stayed pressed to Chrollo, running his thumbs against his nipples once more, and kissing him roughly before reaching up and untying his wrists. Chrollo gave him a slightly surprised look, but before he could get too comfortable, Kurapika tied his hands behind his back and guided him towards the bed. Chrollo laid on his back, his eyes heavy as he gazed up at Kurapika.

Kurapika gazed back down at him, taking hold of his cock firmly with one hand before running the palm of his other hand over the tip. Chrollo was highly responsive to that, squirming almost immediately in his grasp while his face twisted. He moaned with shameless volume as Kurapika continued the smooth, twisting motion while his other hand stroked him.

Chrollo threw his head back, “You’re gonna make me-”

He broke off with a moan, but Kurapika knew what he was going to say. He continued working him in smooth, consistent movements until Chrollo’s whole body shuddered as he let out an ecstatic cry in his orgasm. Kurapika moved his hand, still holding his shaft and stroking him slowly while he came, admiring how the cock ring made it look far more intense as he did.

Chrollo let out a shuddering sigh, going limp and catching his breath. But Kurapika had meant it when he said he was just getting started.

He ran his hand through the cum on Chrollo’s abdomen and chest, smearing it over him, “You’re disgustingly shameless.”

Chrollo’s eyes lit with arousal at the degradation, clearly another turn on he had. Kurapika brought his hand, still slick with Chrollo’s cum, and slapped him across the face with it. For a moment, he’d wondered if he was allowing too much frustration to be vented, but the utterly horny look on Chrollo’s face at the stinging slap assured him he was still well within boundaries. He smeared his fingers over Chrollo’s lips, drawing excited moans from parted lips as he did. Encouraged by the receptiveness and with boundless anger still to be released, Kurapika shoved his fingers in Chrollo’s mouth. Chrollo looked more than happy to take them, using his tongue fervently to clean them while he sucked at them. Kurapika was gentle for a moment, but once Chrollo had adjusted, he used his fingers roughly, nearly shoving them down Chrollo’s throat.

Chrollo made no complaint except for gagging, making Kurapika withdraw his wet fingers, giving Chrollo a moment to cough. He took hold of his cock again, still hard thanks to the ring around it.

Chrollo jerked violently at his touch, letting out a sharp gasp, “What are you doing?”

Kurapika just gazed down at him with a firm expression, “You wanted me to show you how angry I am with you. That’s what I’m doing.”

Kurapika slicked him up again, taking a firm hold with one hand, and once again using his palm over Chrollo’s tip. Chrollo let out a wild, throaty moan instantly at his touch, his voice rising to a wail as this time, Kurapika worked his palm fast and hard over his hypersensitive tip.

Chrollo’s whole body surged with post-orgasm sensitivity as Kurapika stimulated him aggressively. His moans grew frighteningly loud, and his body shook uncontrollably as he cried out at what Kurapika guessed had to be the top of his lungs. He just prayed no one was anywhere near the hideout, or they’d certainly hear Chrollo’s desperate wails.

Chrollo spasmed violently, his voice throaty and hoarse as he choked on his own saliva from the excessive stimulation, “Kurapika! Please!”

If he had another thought to finish that sentence, he never managed to get it out as he coughed, shaking violently.

Kurapika didn’t let up, “Beg me to stop like the shameless bastard you are and **maybe** I’ll consider it.”

Kurapika was shocked to hear the heavy air of dominance in his own voice, and Chrollo was helpless but to continue writhing as his body reacted to the hyperstimulation that was being forced upon it, “God, please!”

He was shaking so violently that it mildly concerned Kurapika, but he knew Chrollo hadn’t broken yet, “Please what? I want to hear you say it.”

He squeezed harder and worked his hand faster, and Chrollo would never get the chance to answer him as his body was gripped by one incredible spasm, forcing out a hoarse scream in his mind shattering ecstasy as he lost control of his body, soaking himself in seminal fluid as his body tried desperately to cum a second time, but couldn’t.

The desperation in his voice was incredible, and Kurapika could see his eyes misting up as he choked, trails of saliva running from the corners of his mouth while his body still trembled violently following his second orgasm. He kept his eyes shut as tightly as he could for a moment immediately following the release, and when he opened them again, they were hazy and unfocused. His chest rose and fell erratically as he gulped air into his lungs in a borderline panicked state, releasing a slew of nonsensical gibberish.

Kurapika soothed him, aware he was completely wasted mentally by the sensations he’d been given. Chrollo began to calm down quickly, catching his breath and allowing his body to stop shaking, though his legs still quivered a bit. His gaze remained fixed somewhere above their heads, still cloudy and absent. He hadn’t cried, though Kurapika knew if he’d pushed him any longer, he certainly would have sobbed pathetically for his touch.

Kurapika gripped his hair, forcing Chrollo to look at him. Chrollo blinked rapidly a few times, looking as though he could barely manage to focus on Kurapika at all.

Kurapika kissed him roughly, “You really are sensitive. And pathetically shameless.”

Chrollo rolled his eyes before closing them, still not sensible enough to answer Kurapika’s taunts.

But Kurapika still wasn’t finished with him. He flipped Chrollo around so that his head rested right at the edge of the bed. He gave him a moment to adjust, considerate enough of Chrollo’s wasted condition. When Chrollo seemed like he was aware of his surroundings again, Kurapika pressed his own erection to Chrollo’s mouth.

Chrollo gave no resistance as he took Kurapika from his upside-down angle, and Kurapika was gripped by the powerful change in the sensations of receiving oral sex from this position as opposed to an upright one. He started slow, but gradually made his strokes fuller and faster, pushing the limit on how far Chrollo could go. He pressed his hand over Chrollo’s exposed throat, gripping him tightly enough to limit the blood flow as he thrust into his mouth. He was incredibly aroused to realize he could feel his own thrusts in Chrollo’s throat, and feel the vibrations and spasms as Chrollo moaned and gagged around him.

He ignored Chrollo’s gags for the most part, but one particularly rough one prompted him to stop choking him and let him cough violently. Chrollo choked, coughing desperately until Kurapika helped him lean a bit upright and regain control of his breathing. Saliva soaked his lips and chin, running down his throat. His pupils were fully dilated, and his eyes glassy. His face was red with the strain of being upside down, sucking Kurapika’s dick, being choked, and gagging all within a matter of moments.

Kurapika gripped his chin, forcing Chrollo to look up at him as he pressed his thumb down and held his mouth open, “How’s it feel to be someone’s bitch?”

Chrollo shut his eyes and moaned sweetly at that, and Kurapika guessed it must feel pretty damn good if that was his reaction.

He laid Chrollo on his back once more, taking in the completely submissive look in his eyes as he lay there. Kurapika picked up the bottle of oil again, pouring it into his hand and slicking himself up.

He gazed down at Chrollo, “Have you ever been on the receiving end?”

Chrollo looked completely helpless beneath him, and all he did was shake his head in response as if words still evaded him.

Kurapika pressed himself to Chrollo’s entrance, placing his hand over his throat once again, “Tell me you’ll be a good boy for me.”

Chrollo’s lips quivered a bit as Kurapika squeezed his neck tightly for a moment before loosening his grip so he could reply, granting Kurapika total dominance over him, “I’ll be a good boy for you.”

Kurapika couldn’t even begin to believe he’d actually said it, and he felt desperately aroused to hear the words in Chrollo’s deliciously silky voice. He eased himself in, drawing a pained groan and twisted face from Chrollo. He remembered how Chrollo had worked him up to it, and he held still for a moment while he adjusted to the sensation.

When Chrollo had visibly relaxed some, he gave him a smooth slow stroke, watching the way Chrollo’s face lit up in pleasure and pain, the combination that seemed to be his favorite thing in the world.

Chrollo moaned, gripped by heavenly sensations as his voice came out as barely more than a whisper, “Please, go hard.”

Kurapika squeezed his throat, “Are you sure? It can hurt a lot.”

Chrollo smiled faintly, and Kurapika guessed that some pain was exactly what Chrollo was looking for, “Please…”

Kurapika wasn’t going to deny him, he paused for a moment, untying Chrollo’s wrists from behind his back. Chrollo wrapped his arms around him instantly, one hand running through Kurapika’s hair while the other ran over his back. Chrollo sighed as he let go, and Kurapika took his position again, carefully pushing back in. He gripped his throat again, curling his fingers and scratching his fingernails over the unmarred skin until he left deep purple marks in his wake. Chrollo just closed his eyes and released a soft sound that was somewhere between a sigh and a moan.

He thrust harder, fuller, and faster this time. Chrollo’s face immediately contorted as he was gripped with pleasure and pain in almost equal amounts. He snapped his jaws shut with a groan at first, but he gave Kurapika no indicator to slow down or stop, so Kurapika continued at the same pace.

Gradually, Chrollo’s face relaxed a bit, and his pained groans turned to pleasured moans. He brought his arms over his head, gripping the pillow beneath him as he cried out in ecstasy. His eyes gazed far away when he opened them, lost in pleasure while his mind was further melted.

His words slurred helplessly beyond understanding, but every once in a while, he managed to get one clearly off his tongue, “Kurapika!”

Kurapika was spurred on by hearing his name cried out with such lust and hunger for more. Every time Chrollo called it, he thrust harder until Chrollo was nearly screaming in his mind-numbing pleasure. Kurapika, too, was gripped with pleasure. Every thrust sending a powerful pulse through him from his erection through his chest. Chrollo was in complete submission, singing for him like a songbird as he gave himself up completely, and Kurapika no longer needed that vice like control on himself.

Kurapika panted desperately, soft moans of his own rising from his throat. Chrollo could do nothing more than close his eyes and cry out now, his body having been so ravaged with sensations that his mind had shut down completely. That sight was enough to drive Kurapika powerfully to his own orgasm, letting himself moan as loudly as he wanted while he came. He supported himself with his hands on Chrollo’s chest, stroking slowly while he rode himself out of orgasm.

Beneath him, Chrollo’s eyes were still shut tight, he was soaked in sweat, his whole body looked completely flushed and he was panting as though he’d just run a marathon. His legs were still quivering as his hands finally released their grip from the pillow and his pleasure-blinded eyes finally came back into some kind of focus.

Kurapika slumped off to one side, feeling completely wasted himself. He watched as Chrollo shakily sat up and began fumbling with the ropes still tied around him. Kurapika helped him, and together they got him untied completely. Kurapika couldn’t help but gaze at all the rope burns that crisscrossed his body from his violent spasms while bound.

Both of them looked ready to fall over, but Chrollo managed to speak, “Are you still angry with me?”

Kurapika could do little more than shake his head as he gave in and laid his head down. All his anger and frustration were gone, he was feeling more satisfied than he ever had in his life, and now all he wanted to do was relinquish that dominance and let someone take care of him. He was utterly exhausted, mentally and physically, and he just wanted to curl up in Chrollo’s arms and forget everything except for his embrace for a while.

Chrollo laughed softly, sounding almost more like a sigh, “That’s good. I’m glad.”

He seemed to pick up on Kurapika’s thoughts, because he pulled the blanket up as he laid down with Kurapika. He ran his hand through Kurapika’s hair as he held him close to his chest, both of them so feeble and desperate for sleep.

Kurapika was rapidly descending into sleep when Chrollo’s voice pulled him back into wakefulness. He barely managed to open his eyes as Chrollo spoke, “Kurapika?”

Kurapika managed to mumble, “Hm?”

Chrollo was quiet for a moment, and Kurapika’s eyes were about to collapse when he finally answered, “I love you.”


	11. Tense Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for; gore, bodily harm, burns

            Kurapika had never slept as soundly as he did while tucked into Chrollo’s embrace that night. He woke comfortably, feeling refreshed but also very aware of his exhausted muscles. Chrollo was awake, still wrapped around him and running his fingers through his hair in slow, pleasant strokes. Kurapika stretched with a yawn, feeling great for the first time in months as he did so.

He looked up at Chrollo, who looked like he’d rather go back to sleep though he gave Kurapika a faint smile, “Good morning.”

Kurapika couldn’t resist a soft smile of his own, “Good morning.”

Chrollo closed his eyes again, allowing himself to doze off for a while longer. Kurapika rolled on his back, still keeping close to Chrollo as he did. He felt relaxed and comfortable, and his mind felt clear and sharp. Kurapika sighed happily, feeling Chrollo’s arm tighten around him a bit as he did. The world felt light again, not heavy and suffocating as it had in the days prior.

 

Some time about an hour later, Kurapika felt Chrollo stir again with a massive stretch. He sniffled as he forced himself to sit up, “If there was ever a day I wanted to sleep in, it’s today.”

Kurapika hummed in amusement, “You already have slept in. It’s got to be about noon by now.”

Chrollo rubbed one of his eyes with a yawn, “You feel like coffee?”

Kurapika nodded, “I could use some.”

Chrollo grabbed his clothes, lazily throwing them back on and poorly attempting to smooth his unruly black hair before he sighed, turning to Kurapika, “Why don’t you come with me?”

Kurapika looked up at him in surprise, “Come with you?”

Chrollo gave him a half smile, “Yeah. I’ve been wondering how long it’s been since you’ve been outside. I thought you could use some sunlight.”

Kurapika’s heart soared, he had never imagined he could miss seeing the sun so much until he’d been cooped up in this building for two months or so, “What about the other Spiders?”

Chrollo chuffed at him, “Don’t worry. We’re all settled on that topic. No one’s going to bother you again.”

Relief swamped Kurapika, “In that case, I’d love to go with you.”

He pulled his own clothes on quickly, though he took a bit longer to comb out his hair and make sure it had some semblance of neatness. He felt a bit childish, following Chrollo around like a kid at a carnival, but he was happy in spite of that. There were times he’d found himself scaling the walls of the dingy room just to peer outside through the cracks. He could never see any detail, and light only passed through directly in the golden hour of sunset, but he longed to feel that blazing orange light over his skin again. At many points, he’d considered asking Chrollo if he could just sit outside for an hour or so, just to feel the sun again, but he’d kept quiet for fear of seeming weak in front of Chrollo.

Now happiness made his steps springy and his eyes bright, and though the fond look Chrollo watched him with made him feel slightly embarrassed, he took it as a sign of genuine good will on his part. He followed Chrollo out into the main hall, immediately conscious of Nobunaga, who was sitting with Shalnark and Feitan while having a seemingly casual conversation.

Shalnark noticed them immediately, “Hi, what’s up, boss?”

Chrollo gave him a friendly smile, “We’re getting coffee, any of you want some?”

Kurapika was always surprised to see how normal they seemed with one another, but in this instance, he wished Chrollo would’ve ignored them should Nobunaga start more trouble.

Shalnark tipped his head, “Both of you?”

Chrollo nodded, catching Feitan’s skeptical look, “Yes, and it’s fine, he’s not going to do anything.”

Feitan gave him a rather amusing face, but he shrugged, “All right, espresso for me. Oh, and get the kid some chocolate milk.”

His eyes ignited with humor as he gestured to Shalnark, who flared with indignation, “I’m not a kid!”

Shalnark stood up, towering over Feitan and opening his mouth as if to say something, but Nobunaga, a sharp smile crossing his face, kicked his foot into the back of his knees, dropping him. Shalnark rounded with a furious look, but the moment he turned his head, Feitan pulled his mask away and planted an unceremonious kiss against his cheek. Shalnark gagged, kicking Feitan and knocking him to the floor where he remained, gripped by laughter.

Chrollo watched with great amusement, a quiet laugh passing his lips, “All right, all right.”

As Chrollo shooed the two mischief makers, Shalnark glared at them, “Assholes.”

Feitan laughed while Nobunaga made an exaggerated kissy face at him, prompting Shalnark to plant the heel of his palm into his lips as he addressed Chrollo, “Get me something sweet, I don’t really care what.”

As he dusted himself off, Nobunaga’s lips quivered wildly as he tried to resist his urge in vain, “Yeah… like chocolate milk!”

He and Feitan burst into laughter again, but Chrollo stepped forward, landing a playful slap over both of their heads, “What, are you two five years old or something?”

His words were scathing but the good-humored smile he wore told a different story. Shalnark had come to stand at Kurapika’s shoulder, still giving the other two a mutinous look.

Kurapika was surprised to find himself speaking to him, “Are they always like that?”

Shalnark seemed surprised too, but he didn’t seem put off by it, “Yeah, pretty much. Everybody has one, and some people are one.”

Kurapika laughed quietly at the disgusted look on Shalnark’s face as he rubbed his cheek, “I take it you’re not a fan of surprises?”

Shalnark finished wiping his face, “Oh no, surprises are great! I’m not a fan of jerks getting their nasty lips all over my face.”

Chrollo had turned to face them with a wide smile, “Careful, Shal, if you tell them how much you hate it, they’ll just make sure to do it twice as often.”

Shalnark muttered something while Nobunaga blew him one more kiss from behind Chrollo’s back.

Their happy air felt contagious, and Kurapika had felt a moment of fondness watching their antics. For so long, the Spider’s had been some vague concept in his mind, heartless monsters filled with greed who got off on killing. And while some of that may be true, as he watched them teasing each other, he knew that at the very least, they were filled with love for one another. They fought daily, and yet nothing could ever drive a wedge between them.

Nobunaga suddenly looked right at him, his face looking more serious than he’d seen it this morning as he seemed to read Kurapika’s mind, “Thinner than water…”

Feitan chimed in at his pause, finishing the thought, “But thicker than blood.”

Kurapika gazed at them in confusion, but Shalnark spoke up, sounding like his usual self again, “That’s the Spider’s bond. It’s what it means to be one of us.”

Kurapika shivered at the way he’d explained that, wondering if he didn’t still expect Kurapika would join them. No moment of childish antics was going to change how opposed Kurapika was to that idea.

But to his relief, Chrollo just nodded in acknowledgment, then turned back to the three men, “That’s right. Now, are you going to tell me what you want or not?”

 

Kurapika stretched his arms wide, facing the sun. The winter air was cold, but still. The sun was warm and invigorating. It had taken Kurapika a long moment to adjust to the brightness of being outside again, but now that he had, he was taking his time to enjoy himself. Chrollo didn’t rush him, he actually looked rather entertained by Kurapika’s joy.

Chrollo had suggested walking, the shop was apparently only a couple of miles down the road, and Kurapika was more than happy to do so. It felt great to stretch his legs again, and secretly pleased him to feel the way they still trembled from the night before. As they walked shoulder to shoulder, Kurapika couldn’t help but wonder if Chrollo was still feeling a bit wobbly too, or if it was simply because he hadn’t been exercising for months that he was feeling sore.

Chrollo gave him an amused look, “Penny for your thoughts?”

Kurapika wasn’t really sure he wanted to be completely honest, “I’m just glad to be outside again. My legs felt so stiff being cooped up in those rooms.”

For a moment Chrollo looked a bit saddened, but his expression changed quickly, “Stiff, huh?”

Kurapika sighed, Chrollo never missed an opportunity, “Yes. Stiff. And Sore.”

Chrollo chuckled to himself, “Oh, that’s not because you haven’t been exercising, don’t worry.”

Kurapika shoved him lightly, scoffing in good humor at how dramatically Chrollo stumbled, “Who’s acting like a five-year-old now?”

Chrollo smiled cheekily, “Mm, you have a point there. But I can’t help it! My legs are still so weak and wobbly.”

Kurapika turned away so Chrollo wouldn’t see how easily he smiled now, “And that’s my fault, is it?”

Chrollo had come to walk beside him again, scoffing, “Yes! Who else’s fault could it be?”

Kurapika mulled, “That’s a valid point.”

The two fell into a comfortable silence, Kurapika taking in the world around him as they walked. Clouds rolled over hills in the distance, and though the weather was nice for the moment, Kurapika guessed that by this evening it will have changed.

Chrollo followed his gaze, “I think it’s going to snow.”

Kurapika looked at him in mild surprise, “You think so? Is it cold enough for snow?”

Chrollo nodded, “It will be by the time those clouds reach us this evening.”

Kurapika hummed, wondering if Chrollo was right. The two fell into step for the rest of the short journey. Kurapika was surprised to see how quickly the buildings went from ruin to lively shop fronts and small, bustling crowds.

Chrollo led the way, and Kurapika was left in wonder at how loud everything seemed. He’d spent so much time locked away with only a person at a time for company that the small crowd of chattering people disoriented him a bit.

Chrollo chuffed sweetly at him, “Wanna hold my hand?”

Kurapika glared at him, though only halfheartedly, “Not in a hundred years.”

Chrollo smiled, turning into a small shop with Kurapika on his heels.

 

…

 

The two wove their way through the people on the streets as they headed back towards the Spider’s lair. Chrollo had, as he should’ve expected, dumped the task of carrying the drinks onto Kurapika while he sipped happily at his caramel macchiato.

Kurapika scoffed, “So, you really do like caramel after all?”

Chrollo smiled, “I told you it’s my favorite. Did you think I was lying?”

Kurapika huffed, “You just didn’t impress me as having such a sweet tooth.”

Chrollo answered by taking another sip of his drink, looking terribly content as he did.

 

When they’d returned to the building ruins, Kurapika found himself sitting outside on a jutting piece of rubble. The wind had started to pick up, but with the still warm drink in his hands, Kurapika didn’t mind. Cold air brushed around him, and he let a chill run down his spine at how good it felt to be outside. He felt free again, even knowing that his heart was still bound to Chrollo, he no longer felt like a captive.

Chrollo was sitting a short distance from him, gazing out across the barren landscape before him. Clouds scuttled across the sky high above their heads, dappling the land in light and shadow. He looked lost in thought, and though Kurapika was curious what he was thinking about, he didn’t want to disturb him either. So instead, he just waited. Chrollo would stir when he was ready to, there was no need to rush him. Kurapika glanced up as shadows fell over them, a solid wall of dark clouds beginning to creep over them, swallowing everything beneath it and shrouding the place in murky light.

Kurapika gazed around, taking in the world around him. There was a stunning loneliness about the place. Though the city lived and breathed only just around the block, a somber quietness enveloped the air. The wind whipped around buildings and through holes and cracks in their structures, but no other sounds reached this place. From their vantage point, Kurapika could see where the buildings fell into complete ruin, no more than short piles of rubble, tapering out until they fell away completely into a vast moorland, contained by distant peaks, and disturbed only by a single, winding road. It was like they existed in a bubble, independent of the rest of the world, just watching from the inside.

“It’s always like this,” Kurapika was jolted from his musings by Chrollo’s voice.

He looked over to him, though Chrollo hadn’t moved an inch, “What do you mean?”

Chrollo sighed, barely audible over the howling wind, “The buildings reflect the sound outward, so it’s eerily quiet here. It shows you how alone we really are. Even in the middle of a bustling city, we are forgotten, abandoned, and alone.”

There was a sadness in his voice as he spoke, “You’re not just talking about the buildings, are you?”

Chrollo shook his head, “It’s the same story told time and time again. Humans are greedy and selfish, we take everything and still demand more. We destroy the land and slaughter the animals, convinced we need more. More buildings, more roads, more machines, more things, more **people.** We keep demanding more and more and more, and yet we can’t even take care of what we have. But we keep demanding **more.** And this is what’s left,” Chrollo gestured around before continuing, “We walk with our heads down and our eyes diverted, pretending we don’t see what’s been left to ruin. We think if we just ignore it, we can extinguish some of the guilt inside of us. We try to forget. But the ruins remain, forgotten, abandoned, and alone. So we exist in this eerie silence, where no warmth reaches, where no voices call out, where no one will even admit we are or have ever been.”

Kurapika was awed by how profoundly sad that felt, “Is that what your life has been?”

Chrollo didn’t answer for a moment, staring far out into the distant hills, “It’s what I was born knowing. Ruin. Decay. This somber loneliness. You once asked me what the Troupe meant to me. It’s my resistance, my defying will.”

Kurapika gazed at him, “What do you mean?”

Chrollo scoffed mutinously, though Kurapika knew it wasn’t directed at him, “Our only companions are one another. Humans, they dump their waste onto us, they think it makes it go away, think leaving it there makes it forgotten. But they’re wrong. We find each other, we accept each other, and we will always accept everything they give us, but we will never let them take **anything** away from us. Thinner than water, we are alone, forgotten, abandoned, and yet thicker than blood, we were lost, and now we are found, and once we are found, we are never, ever to be lost again. That is what it means to be a Spider. We will never be forgotten so long as the Spider lives on, we will never be abandoned until the Spider should breathe her last breath, and we will never be alone or lost again, so long as we have each other.”

Kurapika was taken aback by the conviction and sorrow in his voice, “So that’s what life means in Meteor City…”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s right. I founded the Troupe to defy the world that tried to be rid of us. We exist, and they will know our name, and they will fear it as surely as they fear the wrath of God.”

Kurapika shivered, not from the cold of the air, but from the ice in Chrollo’s words, “What happened? What happened to make you who you are?”

Chrollo’s eyes grew dark, very dark, “That’s something I’m not fond of discussing.”

Kurapika nodded slowly, still burning with curiosity, but respecting Chrollo’s wishes, “I see.”

Chrollo sat in silence for a long while, Kurapika left to stare at his motionless figure as the wind grew even rougher, buffeting him as the frigid air began to blow the first dusty flakes of snow towards them. Chrollo reached out his hand, watching as the tiny flakes fell into his palm, melting only moments later. He huffed to himself, looking sickly amused, though he didn’t let Kurapika in on whatever thoughts were occupying his mind.

Eventually, he shook himself, looking over at Kurapika, “What do you say to going out to eat? I don’t really want to stay here at the moment, and I told you I wouldn’t leave you again.”

Kurapika was surprised by the change in his attitude, but grateful to see him shake some of the gloom that had been hanging over him since his earlier speech, “That sounds nice.”

Chrollo stood up, stretching for a moment before gesturing for Kurapika to follow, I’m going to let Shalnark know where we’ll be, and get an idea what everyone else will be up to while we’re gone.”

Kurapika nodded and followed him back into the hideout. Shalnark was sitting with Feitan, playing cards. Nobunaga had vanished, and no one else seemed to have appeared as the two approached.

Chrollo glanced around, “Has Nobunaga left?”

Shalnark nodded, “Yeah, he met up with Phinks and Shizuku a little while ago.”

Feitan added, “We stayed behind to hold fort since we knew you were still somewhere nearby.”

Chrollo nodded, “Thank you, I appreciate that. Are you two content here? Or would you like to go out?”

Kurapika willed them not to come. Shalnark was one thing, but Kurapika hadn’t forgotten the cold sadism of Feitan as he pinned him down and tormented him.

To his relief, Feitan shook his head, “I’ll pass, thank you for the offer though.”

Shalnark mulled for a moment longer before conceding, “I think I’ll stay here too, as long as you’re okay on your own, boss.”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s perfectly fine. Between Kurapika and myself, I don’t imagine anyone short of Silva Zoldyck could pose as much of a threat.”

Shalnark and Feitan made the exact same face at the exact same time, “Oh, you’re both going out? Again?”

Chrollo smiled faintly at their most curious reactions, “Yes.”

They looked to each other, then Feitan back to Chrollo, “Is there something we ought to know about, boss?”

Chrollo smiled wickedly, making Feitan cringe, “On second thought, please, keep it to yourself.”

Chrollo gave him a light tap with his boot, “It’s nothing like that, Feitan.”

Kurapika bit his tongue, _it’s **exactly** like that!_

Feitan shrugged, “I trust you. Just give Shal a call if you need anything. If not, we’ll be here when you get back.”

Chrollo nodded, “I appreciate it.”

Shalnark waved them off as they left, his eyes never looking away from the cards in his hand. Kurapika followed Chrollo out into the cold, the snow was falling much harder now, blanketing the ground in a thin but opaque coat of white.

Chrollo mused momentarily, scarping his boot through the snow, “Guess I should drive carefully.”

Unlocking the doors to the Mercedes, which was parked beneath the jutting roof of one of the buildings, the two of them climbed in. The chill of the black leather interior sent a shiver through Kurapika, despite the coat Chrollo had lent him back at the hideout.

The car started with a simple tap from Chrollo, and he gestured towards a button on the center console, “There are seat warmers, if you like.”

Kurapika wasn’t about to pass that up as he pressed the button, “Maybe I don’t want to know the answer to this question but, how exactly did you get a car this nice?”

Chrollo chuckled, “I’m incredibly rich and I could buy this car a hundred times over with the money I find between couch cushions.”

When Kurapika looked unimpressed with his bragging, he went on, “But why take the time to go fishing in the couch cushions when you can waltz right up to some nice hotel and hot wire the thing instead.”

Kurapika had to admit that the image of that sounded funny, “Is that really what you did?”

Chrollo laughed, “I have before, don’t get me wrong. But for this one, I just told some rich sap I was the valet and drove off with it after disabling the GPS and later reprogrammed the console and changed the plates.”

Kurapika couldn’t help but laugh, “You’re a real piece of work, you know that?”

Chrollo smiled, “We’re all a product of where we’ve been.”

 

Kurapika sighed, relaxing into the warm seat and reminiscing about their first encounter. It felt like ages ago, though Kurapika knew it had only been approximately two months. He shook his head, scolding himself for having been so incredibly gullible and naïve at the time.

But now he sighed comfortably, life wasn’t all that bad anymore. He leaned against the door, watching the way the snow fell serenely outside the window. The cold had driven most people indoors, and the streets were empty but for a single car in the distance behind them as they drove slowly through the white blanket.

He was lost in thought when Chrollo spoke to him, “Are you a picky eater?”

Kurapika gave him a look, “Two months of eating whatever the cat dragged in and you think I’m a picky eater?”

Chrollo smiled, “Hey now, just a question.”

Kurapika smiled too, “No, I’m fine with just about anything.”

Chrollo hummed, “All right then. If that’s the case, we’ll go somewhere close.”

Kurapika had no objection as Chrollo pulled into a largely deserted parking lot. He guessed that most people would rather eat at home during a snowstorm, but he was feeling the exact opposite. He was thrilled to be out and doing things, even in the bitter cold. Chrollo sighed, enjoying the warm car for a moment longer before he opened the door and hopped out. Kurapika followed, cold biting at his feet as they sank into the snow.

Chrollo gave him an apologetic look, “Sorry, I’d have lent you some shoes too if we wore the same size.”

Kurapika shivered from head to toe, but he still smiled at him, “It’s all right, it’s not like we’ll be eating our food out here anyway.”

Chrollo conceded, leading the way into the restaurant. It was a nice place, not too unlike the one they’d gone to on their first meeting, but much smaller and emptier. Chrollo shook the snow off himself as he stood just inside the doorway with Kurapika. The waitress smiled at him as he approached, “Hi. Would you like your usual seat?”

Chrollo smiled amicably at her, “That would be nice, thank you.”

Kurapika hummed, “ _Usual_ seat, huh?”

Chrollo nodded, “It’s my favorite place to eat. I come here often.”

The waitress led the way to a secluded corner of the restaurant, it was quiet and the red candle on the table was already lit, as if they’d been expected. It was a quiet booth that afforded a clean view of the entire restaurant, and a large window faced the deserted streets outside.

Kurapika smiled a bit, it was a nice little place. Chrollo didn’t even touch his own menu, clearly already knowing what he wanted. Kurapika thumbed through the options, settling for the sautéed white fish when merely thinking about it made his stomach growl.

Chrollo had ordered a house specialty dish with a single glass of white zinfandel to accompany it while Kurapika had requested black jasmine tea to go with his meal.

Chrollo looked impressed, “You have excellent taste.”

Kurapika didn’t know why, but he felt pleasantly embarrassed by his praise, “Thanks, I think.”

Chrollo smiled softly, but just stared out the window.

 

Kurapika swore he’d never tasted food so good after two months of eating whatever take out food was convenient to bring him. Chrollo sipped slowly on the wine while he gazed warmly outside. Kurapika thought he looked truly content to be where he was in that moment.

When they’d finished, the waitress returned with dessert, and Kurapika chuckled to see that it was crème caramel custard.

Chrollo smiled at him, “And now, you’re about to find out why this is my favorite food in the entire world.”

Kurapika couldn’t even begin to hide his joy at the sweet flavor and smooth yet fluffy texture. Chrollo watched him with great amusement in his eyes, “And now you know.”

Kurapika ducked his head self-consciously, “I can’t even argue with that.”

Chrollo smiled, looking satisfied as he took another bite.

 

The waitress returned with their bill some time later, and Kurapika was surprised to see Chrollo not only pay the bill in cash, but to leave a generous tip as well, “I thought you never paid for things unless you absolutely had to?”

Chrollo tucked his wallet back into his coat pocket, “Normally, you’re absolutely right. But that waitress is also the shop owner, and she’s from Meteor City as well. I have a different philosophy when it comes to my own people.”

Kurapika gazed wide-eyed, “Huh. Who’d have guessed.”

Chrollo smiled at him, “Besides, how would I be a regular customer if I always shirked the bill?”

Kurapika blinked at him, feeling a bit slow, “I, uh, I didn’t think of that.”

Chrollo laughed softly, “You’re hopeless, you know that?”

Kurapika didn’t know why, but he felt suddenly flustered by Chrollo, as if being out in the world with him made everything that had transpired more real. Despite his bashfulness, Kurapika felt a small flame of happiness kindling in his heart.

 

Maybe life wasn’t so bad after all. And it was with that thought that he let his guard down, just when he needed it most.

 

…

 

Kurapika was lying on his back, gazing up at a dark grey sky, watching the white flakes dance their way down to him, squinting at the bright orange streetlights that bled onto him as he lay motionless in the snow. The world was silent. Completely silent. And he just laid there, watching the snow drift lazily.

_That looks so beautiful…_

Kurapika was disturbed by a ringing sound, it was so obnoxious it made his head pound. He shut his eyes tightly, willing the sharp noise to go away and let him rest peacefully.

But the noise only grew louder and louder, forcing Kurapika to press his hands to his ears to try and mute it somehow, but the noise was from the inside, and he could do nothing to stop it.

_That’s not right… Something’s wrong…_

Kurapika opened his eyes again, trying to roll onto his side despite the pain in his head. He could only just manage to twist his torso, and he had to take a break to catch his breath.

He was left staring vacantly at more orange light, _A streetlight?... No, there wouldn’t be a streetlight on the ground… What am I looking at?..._

Awareness crashed over him, _That’s a fire!_

He jolted back to reality, realizing what had happened a moment before the pain came. He groaned in agony, his head felt like someone had taken an ax to it, and there was a truly incredible pain in his leg. His breathing was ragged, and the ringing in his ears continued as he forced himself the rest of the way over and onto his side.

He dared to look down, running his hands cautiously over himself, feeling for any breaks or major wounds. He found only one, a piece of black metal was impaled deep into his left thigh. Kurapika tried not to think about it as he willed his leg to move, but it wouldn’t.

After a struggle, he managed to haul himself onto his hands, allowing him to pull his uninjured leg beneath himself for support. He blinked rapidly, trying to clear away the concussive fog that clouded his vision and thoughts. The tinnitus had let up some, though Kurapika didn’t know if there was anything else to hear at the moment.

Clearing his head some, he looked around. He was sitting in that same deserted parking lot, the only difference was that bright orange flames now engulfed the spot where the Mercedes had been parked. He looked down at himself, his clothes were tattered and burned, his leg looked severely wounded, and he was splattered with blood. Checking himself over again, Kurapika couldn’t find the source of the blood, sending him into a moment of panic before a single thought made him freeze completely.

 

_Chrollo._

Looking around the clearing frantically, Kurapika could see a black shape on the ground beyond the flames. He could recognize Chrollo’s long back coat, and for a moment all he could do was stare and pray that he would get up.

 

But he didn’t.

 

Desperation propelled Kurapika’s movements as he tried standing on his good leg. He was terribly unsteady, his head spun and throbbed with pain from his concussion, but he managed to drag himself slowly over to where Chrollo was lying. He stumbled a few times, grinding his teeth from the pain in his left leg, but he forced himself to keep moving, battling the darkness that singed the edges of his vision. He collapsed beside Chrollo’s motionless body, dragging himself the last couple of feet.

Chrollo still didn’t move, and Kurapika was gripped with fear as he carefully reached out and touched him, “Chrollo?”

He knew he’d spoken, but his voice sounded drowned and quiet. He couldn’t tell if he’d received a response, and he had to work up his courage to lean over Chrollo and see how badly he’d been injured.

 

He prayed that he hadn’t been hurt too badly, and he had never been more disappointed in his life.

 

Chrollo was awake, his eyes wide as he shook uncontrollably, clearly lost to shock already. And it wasn’t hard to see why. Kurapika recoiled at the sight of horrendous burns on his arms, chest, and side of his face along his jaw and part of his cheek. A huge gash stretched from his chin to his temple, pouring blood over his face and into his eyes. But what truly made Kurapika feel sick was what he saw when he looked at his hands.

Chrollo was gripping his abdomen with burned hands, clutching so tightly that what skin he still had left on them had turned as white as the snow. Kurapika retched to realize he’d been completely eviscerated, the frightening wound running from his hip to his sternum, and if it weren’t for his hands holding on so desperately, there would be nothing there to hold his organs in place. And Kurapika could guess by the pool of blood that was melting the snow beneath this terrible wound that Chrollo had already suffered that possibility.

 

_He’s going to die… He’s really going to die!_

Alarm gripped Kurapika, and for a moment all he could do was stare and panic, _he’s going to die if I don’t do something!_

Kurapika battled his nausea with the knowledge that he was the only thing standing between Chrollo and death right now.

_I have to use Emperor Time, I have to use Holy Chain._

Having a clear plan in mind helped Kurapika focus and control his panic. He struggled desperately, he hadn’t been able to use Emperor Time in his fight against Nobunaga, and his aura still felt shaky and thin.

_This is different, I **have** to use it now!_

With that came realization, the only chance he had to use Emperor Time. He had to place a condition.

_Let me use my own life to save his!_

With that condition in place, Kurapika felt sick with relief to see how solidly his Holy Chain conjured, glowing with powerful aura as it wrapped around Chrollo’s mortally wounded body.

Kurapika felt the sensation instantly as his eyes blazed and his aura pulsed powerfully through the chain. He could feel the life within him draining by the second, but he could also the wounds on Chrollo healing rapidly, and he knew he had to hang on to consciousness no matter what it meant for him.

It took only moments for Kurapika to feel his heart begin to beat desperately and erratically, and he knew no matter how hard he fought, he wouldn’t be able to keep going but for a few more seconds. He felt the splitting pain in his chest as his heart stopped with one final spasm, and as the blackness devoured him, he could only pray that it had been enough to keep Chrollo alive, and that this time, his prayers would be answered.

 

…

 

Pain, fear, and fire. That was all Kurapika knew in his tormented darkness.

_I must be in hell…_

The worst pain he’d ever felt stabbed through his chest repeatedly, over and over again. Every inch of his body was engulfed in invisible flames, burning away his flesh and bone, but never burning out. He tried to kick and lash out, anything at all to end his suffering, not caring if he was dead or alive anymore. But nothing worked. His torment went on and on, with no end in sight, and nothing he could do to stop the agony that seared him to the bone.

_I **must** be in hell._

When the pain finally subsided, Kurapika could only assume he was either dying, or he was already dead, and discovering that hell was a finite experience before moving on to something else. What he didn’t expect is that he was actually alive, and was awakening from his comatose state.

 

At first, all he was aware of was his heavy, noisy breathing, and the pounding of his heartbeat. But he focused on that, feeling the fire drain from his veins. He didn’t really care what happened beyond that, cooling down was the only thing that mattered to him at the moment.

As he focused on his breathing, he was surprised to hear a voice reach him in the darkness, “His fever’s broken!”

He didn’t know who it was, but he hoped they’d speak again. He’d been alone in his personal hell, and he wanted that voice to come back, to know that there was someone else out there, waiting for him just beyond the darkness.

And then another voice, “Let me see.”

And an answer, “Should we give him the adrenaline shot?”

And another, “Yes, I think he’s waking up.”

Kurapika didn’t feel the needle they spoke of pierce his skin, but he did feel the blood begin to race through his veins and roar in his ears. As it pulsed through him, he could hear more and more. He could hear someone shifting through things on his right side, and he could hear another person on his left side tearing what sounded like the wrapper of a bandage.

And then he could feel again. He felt the person on his left pinch a spot on his arm, and a hand come to rest over his forehead. He could feel his breathing hitch momentarily, before falling into a quieter and more natural rhythm, though his heart continued to race.

And then he opened his eyes. Everything was bright and fuzzy at first, and it took minutes before his eyes began to adjust. He blinked a few times, squeezing his eyes shut tightly as he did as though he were trying to clear them of dust or debris. They stung a bit, but not enough to make him keep them closed.

Finally, he blinked them open, and he could recognize who was with him, and he felt his heart stop all over again.

 

“Gon! Leorio!” unbridled joy coursed through him to see their faces gazing down at him.

Leorio’s face was taut with concern, “Kurapika…”

Before he could gather his thoughts, Gon burst in, “Kurapika! You’re okay!”

Turning to look somewhere over his shoulder, he called out, “Killua! He’s awake!”

Kurapika felt tears threaten as he saw Killua come to stand next to Gon, gazing down at him with a bashful but soft expression, “It’s good to see you again.”

A hot tear ran down his cheek as he gazed back at the three of them, “Thank you. For being here.”

Gon smiled, “Of course we’d be here!”

Kurapika returned his smile, but Leorio still looked tense as he spoke, “Kurapika, we didn’t just happen to show up here.”

He squinted, still feeling groggy, “What do you mean?”

Killua matched Leorio’s grim expression as he continued, “Well, we were brought here.”

Gon blinked at them, “But it’s fine, right? I mean, we **had** to help Kurapika, we couldn’t just leave him.”

Kurapika scowled, “What are you talking about? I don’t understand.”

They all exchanged a look, Killua speaking first, “Maybe we should just let him rest for now.”

Kurapika shook his head, “No, please tell me.”

Neither Leorio or Killua looked willing to speak, but Gon puffed his cheek out, “Fine, I’ll tell him. That tall guy with the cross tattoo had his short friend and his blonde friend come snatch us off the street. He didn’t tell us anything at first, but eventually he told us you were really hurt, and that there was nothing they could do to help you anymore. We thought it was a trap, but he swore it wasn’t, and he told us if there was anything that was going to save you, it was us. I guess... I didn’t really understand until I saw you…”

Kurapika had begun trembling, prompting Leorio to gently interrupt Gon with a shake of his head.

Kurapika closed his eyes, emotion welling up in him, _Chrollo…_

He opened his eyes again, getting a grip on what he was feeling and turning back to Gon, “Do you know where he is now?”

Gon tipped his head, “The guy with the cross tattoo? I think he’s still here somewhere, I remember what he smelled like from when I first met him, and his scent is still fresh in the air.”

Kurapika huffed, amused, _I should remember to tell him to shower later… Not that it would matter much, with how sharp Gon’s sense of smell is._

Kurapika looked over at him, “Will you go get him, please?”

Leorio glared at him, “Why the hell would we do that? He’s the one who did this to you, isn’t he?”

Kurapika remembered that they had no idea what had gone on in the months since he’d been taken captive, “No, he didn’t do this to me. Please, I need to speak to him.”

Leorio glared hard at him, while Gon and Killua exchanged a concerned and confused glance. Eventually, Gon nodded decisively, standing up, “I’ll go get him.”

Leorio turned that glare on Gon, “Are you crazy? Don’t you dare go get that freak!”

Kurapika winced to hear the fury in Leorio’s voice, more so to know that he had once felt that way too.

Gon looked confused, “But Kurapika said it’s okay, and he’s been here a lot longer than we have. He must have a good reason for trusting him, Kurapika is a cautious person, not a rash one.”

Leorio looked incredulous, “Do you hear yourself? How can you say that! Do you even remember how he got in this situation in the first place? He teamed up with Hisoka behind our backs! He nearly got you two killed! If it were up to me, I’d have never let you step foot back here to begin with!”

Kurapika felt a thorn pierce his heart at those harsh words.

Gon flared indignantly, “Leorio! Can’t you understand-”

He was interrupted by a smooth, silky voice from the doorway, “Are you all quite finished?”

Leorio jumped from his seat, grabbing Gon and pulling him behind him.

He spat with fury, “Stay away from Kurapika! Don’t you dare come any closer!”

Kurapika didn’t have to see who it was to recognize the voice, “Leorio, stop. It’s okay-”

Leorio rounded on him, “Like hell it is!”

The scuff of a shoe made him whip back around to face Chrollo as he advanced regardless, rubbing his temple and making a pained face as he did.

He rubbed one eye, and Kurapika could tell something was off with him, “Will you please stop yelling? I have a splitting migraine.”

Leorio raised his voice higher, “Am I supposed to feel sorry for you? Well I don’t! You sick, twisted bastard!”

Chrollo had covered one ear and contorted his neck as Leorio yelled, and Kurapika could tell he had no patience left to spare today, “Leorio, you need to shut up right now.”

Leorio turned to yell something else, but as he did, Kurapika lunged up and caught his neck, pulling him down hard so that he couldn’t raise his voice, “I said shut up, Leorio. You’ll thank me later.”

Leorio still glared heatedly as Kurapika released him, but he stayed quiet this time.

Chrollo grunted, “Thank you, Kurapika.”

He came to stand above the bed where Kurapika lay, sitting down beside him in a heavy, unceremonious fashion.

Gon had taken up a spot defensively against Kurapika, looking ready to fight at a moments notice. Kurapika gathered his strength and reached up to gently grab Gon’s wrist, “It’s okay, Gon. He’s not going to hurt me.”

From this distance, Kurapika could see that Chrollo’s eyes were puffy and bloodshot, black rings encircled them, and deep creases had formed above and beneath them, telling Kurapika he hadn’t slept in a long time.

Chrollo gazed down at him through weary eyes, speaking very quietly, “It’s good to see you awake.”

Kurapika gazed back, “You too.”

Leorio gave him a disbelieving look, but Killua interrupted before he could launch off yelling again, “What’s this about, anyway?”

Kurapika could tell he was still full of fear, and he admired his courage and dedication to push through it to stand up to the head Spider.

Chrollo blinked a couple of times, looking as though he didn’t really know what was going on, “What do you mean?”

Killua looked suddenly uncertain about having spoken, and he cast a glance at Gon instead.

Gon seemed to get the message, and finished for him, “Why did you bring us here? I mean, I know why we came, Kurapika’s our friend, but why would you care what happened to him?”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes as he spoke, as though the information were too much to process in his current state.

Eventually, he rubbed his eyes again, “Your concern is unwarranted.”

Gon looked ready to snap back, but a moment of awareness reminded him to keep his voice down lest he piss the head Spider off, “It is our concern.”

Chrollo scowled, “It’s not. You helped him, he’s alive. That’s all you need to know.”

Gon looked ready to argue, but Leorio stood up instead, “Sounds like you’re saying we’re free to go.”

Gon and Killua both stared at him in shock, and Kurapika’s heart ached to realize Leorio was so willing to abandon him where he lay.

Chrollo glared him foully, “If it means I don’t have to listen to **you** babble on anymore, then yes. You’re **very** welcome to leave.”

Leorio scoffed at him, “Good. Gon, Killua, let’s go.”

Kurapika felt his heart break, he knew he was safe with Chrollo, but seeing Leorio’s willingness to leave him still stung.

Gon glared at Leorio, “No way. I’m not just leaving Kurapika.”

Leorio grabbed his wrist, “He got himself in this situation, and he dragged you into it. Let him get himself out of it.”

To Kurapika, he added, “I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. But I can’t risk their lives for yours. I hope you understand.”

Kurapika still felt a bit betrayed by Leorio, but he did understand.

Gon, however, pulled his arm free, “I told you I’m not leaving him.”

Kurapika was warmed by that, and he reached up to take Gon’s hand briefly, “Thank you, Gon. You really are incredible, so bright and brave. I don’t know what I did to deserve a friend like you. That’s why I’m being honest with you now, you can go, and I’ll be fine.”

He smiled at him as he spoke, and he could feel Gon sink some, “Kurapika… I believe you.”

Gon forced a smile, and Kurapika hoped he’d given him at least a little reassurance. Even Chrollo looked impressed with the strength of Gon’s heart.

Leorio turned to leave, looking truly sorrowful, “You heard him, he’ll be fine. So let’s get out of here.”

Gon and Killua followed slowly, and Kurapika ached to see them leave so soon. He’d wished they could’ve stayed, but he knew Chrollo wasn’t sending them away out of spite. Their safety couldn’t be guaranteed here.

As Leorio passed Chrollo, he shot him a nasty look, “Fuckin’ bastard.”

Chrollo gave an even nastier look, “Gutless coward.”

Killua shoved Leorio hard, not giving him a chance to escalate things any further. Chrollo scoffed at him as he was shooed from the room.

Gon paused in the doorway, turning back to Kurapika with a wide, confident smile, “We’ll see you soon, Kurapika. I know we will.”

Kurapika’s heart soared, and Chrollo looked up at Gon from where he sat, “I see why Kurapika went so far for you. You’re a good kid, so stay out of trouble for a while and make sure you keep that promise.”

Gon didn’t seem to know what to say to the head Spider, but Kurapika was awed by the way he showed no fear towards him either, “I’ll keep my promise to him, no matter what.”

Chrollo smiled faintly, but said no more as Gon finally followed after Killua and Leorio.

 

When the three had left, Kurapika was left alone with Chrollo. He looked awful, slumped off to one side and clearly exhausted. Kurapika tried to sit up, but when he moved his left leg, he let out a sharp gasp at the pain.

Chrollo looked at him through a barely open eye, “Take it easy. Machi’s stitches are holding that wound together, but you haven’t been healing properly since you fell into that coma.”

Kurapika eased himself very carefully into a half-reclined position, “What do you mean? And what happened?”

Chrollo hauled himself to his feet, but he swayed once he did and dropped onto one knee.

Kurapika felt concern begin to mount in him, “Are you okay?”

Chrollo caught his breath for a moment before trying again. This time, he made it to the edge of the bed before he dropped his weight onto it with a strained grunt.

Kurapika reached out, taking his hand, “You need to rest, you look awful.”

Chrollo squeezed his hand gently, running his thumb over Kurapika’s long, slender fingers, and looking utterly miserable as he did, “I can’t sleep. I can’t even close my eyes.”

Kurapika furrowed his brow, “Why not?”

He knew that was a stupid question, and the mutinous look he received only corroborated that, “Because every time I close my eyes, I see myself lying there with my guts on the ground. And when I fall asleep, it’s like I can actually feel them falling out of me again, like they just ooze out around my hands and there’s nothing I can do to stop them.”

Kurapika felt his stomach twist at the thought of that, but if Chrollo could manage not to throw up, so could he, “I’m so sorry…”

Chrollo sighed, “You’ve nothing to be sorry for. You’re the only reason I’m here.”

He turned a furious look on Kurapika, startling him as he continued, “And on that topic, why didn’t you tell me what the risks of Emperor Time were?”

Kurapika stared at him, “What?”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, “You didn’t tell me using those abilities savages your body and your aura like that. Do you have any idea how much damage you did to yourself when you healed me?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, “That wasn’t just Emperor Time… I needed to do something or you would’ve died, and I couldn’t use Emperor Time because my aura was already weakened severely, so I placed an additional condition… That I would use the energy that sustains my life in place of my aura so I could heal you.”

Chrollo had never looked more furious, “Are you out of your mind? Do you have any idea what that did to you?”

Kurapika felt small under his exhausted but blazing glare, “I figured it would kill me…”

Chrollo looked ready to beat him senseless, “And it nearly did! You’ve been comatose for over a week now. Your fever peaked at 108 degrees, **any** higher and you would’ve certainly died. Kurapika, you were literally boiling to death from the inside out.”

The fire-like sensation that swallowed him while he was unconscious suddenly made sense, “I really thought I was in hell.”

Chrollo ground his teeth, “If you ever do something that stupid again, I’ll make you wish you **were** in hell.”

Kurapika wasn’t sure now was the time for dry humor, but he couldn’t help himself, “Living up to your last name, I see.”

For a moment, he was convinced Chrollo was about to break his nose, but he restrained himself, “God, you’re so fucking stupid.”

Kurapika chuckled, “That’s unlike you. You sound like Leorio.”

Chrollo shook his head, “I haven’t slept since the explosion and I’m delirious and you’re really pissing me off. Oh, and don’t ever compare me to that gutless beanstalk again.”

Kurapika laughed a little harder, “ _Beanstalk._ ”

Chrollo shook his head again, but he seemed to be calming down, due to exhaustion if nothing else.

Kurapika’s humor faded as he looked at him, “You really need to sleep.”

Chrollo looked at him, and Kurapika thought that if he hadn’t just spoken to him, he would think the man was already dead. His skin held no color, and his eyes caught no light.

He looked worn so thin, “I told you, I can’t.”

Kurapika pulled at him, trying to coax him to lay down, “Please try. I’ll watch over you, I promise.”

Chrollo looked away, holding still for a moment before he spoke, “I can’t.”

His hand trailed over his abdomen, as if even thinking about it would cause the wound to reopen.

Kurapika felt a terrible sadness for him, once so proud and strong, now so beaten and damaged, “Were you afraid that you’d die?”

Chrollo shook his head lightly, “No. I’m not afraid of dying. But lying there awake and aware, seeing my skin melted off and feeling myself be gutted…”

He didn’t finish, just shaking his head as though he were trying to shake the memory from his brain.

Kurapika sighed, “Acute stress disorder. Anyone would be experiencing that after what you went through. I still… don’t really know what happened.”

Chrollo squeezed his hand a little tighter, “We don’t know who’s responsible, but someone planted an IED under the car. Apparently,” he added mutinously, “A pretty powerful one.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, the car he’d seen following behind in the distance, the fact that the restaurant was a part of Chrollo’s routine, and a fuzzy memory he’d forgotten until now involving a third pair of footsteps in the snow, all piecing together to make sense now, “Who would do that.”

Chrollo sighed, “It’s a shorter list to ask who **wouldn’t** do that. Anyway, I’ve got Shal and Fei looking into it, so we don’t have to worry just yet.”

Kurapika tugged at him again, “Will you at least lay down with me? I won’t try to make you sleep, but please, just rest your body for a bit.”

Chrollo looked at him, Kurapika had never seen someone more dead inside. He stared with a terrible longing for a moment, before he gave a feeble sigh and gave up, laying his head on Kurapika’s chest.

Kurapika stroked his hair as he lie there, hoping that Chrollo wouldn’t be able to stay awake, and that he’d eventually collapse beneath the weight of his exhaustion. He wrapped both of his arms around Chrollo, feeling the other man heave a painful, miserable sigh before the tension gripping his muscles seemed to melt. Kurapika continued to hold him as he felt Chrollo finally giving up, his body having reached the point of total shutdown due to exhaustion.

 

Kurapika ran his fingers through his hair, taking in the deep, steady breathing from Chrollo, and making a silent vow to him, _I promise I’ll watch over you._


	12. Insomnia

            Chrollo stirred after only an hour of rest, looking just as badly as he had when he’d fallen asleep. He’d spent the entire time muttering deliriously to himself and though Kurapika couldn’t understand what he was saying, he could hear the note of fear in his tone.

Kurapika sighed as he woke with a jolt, the confusion on his face telling Kurapika he was still delirious as he gazed vacantly around the room.

Eventually, his eyes settled on Kurapika, and he was warmed to see some relief grace them as he recognized him.

Chrollo relaxed a bit, laying his head down again, “Are you okay?”

Kurapika softened to hear the concern in his voice, “Why are you worrying about me? You’re the one who looks like they’ve been through hell and back, take care of yourself for once.”

Chrollo mumbled something before forcing himself to sit up. He swayed, looking ready to pass out at any moment. His eyes were still blackened and he looked as though he may as well not have slept at all.

Kurapika sat up a bit more as Chrollo tried to stand up, “Where are you going?”

Chrollo grunted with just the effort of standing up, “I need to talk to Feitan and Shalnark.”

Kurapika couldn’t stand up to follow him with his injured leg, so he stretched as much as he could to grab his arm, “It hasn’t been more than an hour. I’m sure if they knew anything more they’d have come to find you already. You need rest, you can’t just pretend you’re okay by forcing yourself to keep working.”

Chrollo looked ready to argue, but before he could speak, Machi came into the room.

She gave Chrollo one look over, “He’s right. You look like hell. You’re gonna end up killing yourself if you keep this up.”

Chrollo squinted hard, as though he could barely focus on anything that was happening around him, “I’ll be fine.”

Both Kurapika and Machi sighed together before Machi set a bag down and began fishing through it. She pulled out a small bottle of pills, dumping two circular white pills into her palm.

Chrollo gave her a suspicious look, “What’s that?”

Machi handed them to him, “It’ll help you sleep.”

Chrollo immediately handed them back, “I don’t need them.”

Machi let out an exasperated sigh, turning to Kurapika, “Can you talk some sense into him?”

Kurapika was startled by her question, “Huh?”

Machi rolled her eyes, “Forget it. I’ll just go bring you both some water.”

Chrollo grumbled to himself, though Kurapika was grateful to see he’d sat back down. Machi returned with two glasses of water, shooting Kurapika a dire look as she offered his glass to him. He followed her implication immediately, making absolutely certain to grab the glass she had gestured to. Chrollo was so exhausted that he didn’t notice anything awry as he gulped the water down, Machi looking satisfied at his blind trust in her.

Chrollo stopped suddenly, having already drank virtually all of the water. He grimaced as he tasted it, “Is this tap water?”

Kurapika stared at him in disbelief, someone of his caliber should’ve noticed it was drugged immediately.

Machi answered, “Yeah, I just chilled it with some ice.”

Chrollo looked thoughtful for a moment, then finished drinking it. Machi caught Kurapika’s eye, shaking her as she did.

With a huge sigh, she turned to him, “Keep an eye on him, will you?”

Kurapika nodded as Chrollo eyed them suspiciously, apparently aware that something was off, but not sharp enough to realize Machi had pulled a very obvious trick on him.

 

Within minutes, Chrollo had begun to show symptoms of the drug in his system. He’d begun to slouch, as though the effort of sitting up straight was too much for his numbing muscles.

He shook his head, apparently trying to clear it, “I don’t feel good…”

Kurapika wasn’t sure whether he should tell him what was really happening, “You’re probably just exhausted. You should lay down with me again.”

Chrollo shook his head, “I feel… really dizzy…”

Kurapika made a face, “Do you feel nauseous?”

Chrollo brought a hand to his face, “No… I don’t know… Maybe…”

He tried to stand up, but immediately fell down, supporting himself against the bed frame.

Kurapika gazed sympathetically at his confused face, “You should really just come lay down for a while.”

Chrollo let out a strange sound as he tried to haul himself to his feet, but found his limbs already falling into paralysis, “What… did you do to me?”

Kurapika took his hands and pulled him up so he could rest his weight on the bed, “I didn’t do it, Machi did.”

Chrollo looked distressed, clearly still fighting the powerful drug in his system, “What… is it?”

Kurapika helped him get the rest of the way up, aware that he was already numbed and would be falling unconscious within the next few moments, “It’s Flunitrazepam.”

Chrollo managed to scowl, “You gave me Rohypnol?”

Kurapika gazed apologetically at him, “Machi did. But yes.”

Chrollo tried to say something more, but his words slurred uselessly, and Kurapika could see his pupils were already dilated fully.

He stroked him gently, “I’m sorry. But you need to rest. I’ll keep an eye on you while you sleep, okay?”

Chrollo made some kind of sound, Kurapika guessed he was still trying to air his grievances at him, but whatever he wanted to say was lost as he gave way to unconsciousness, his eyes slowly closing.

 

…

 

Chrollo slept soundly through the rest of the day. His breathing was deep and slow, and he laid perfectly still due to the numbness the drug had induced. Kurapika felt a pang of guilt over it, but he and Machi had both seen how delirious the Spider had grown. At least for now, he was resting well, his cheek smooshed into a pillow and a quiet snoring coming from him.

But it left Kurapika alone, with time to think. In the quiet room, he’d begun to realize something was wrong with him. His leg still ached terribly, but it should have been healed after only a day or two, less even, considering Machi’s stitches were holding it together. Even so, Kurapika could see the paper-thin line where the wound still existed, stubbornly refusing to heal.

Kurapika felt tired, not sleepy, but exhausted like he’d just run a marathon at an incline. But after an entire week of doing nothing but recovering, he shouldn’t have been feeling so fatigued. When he tried to use Zetsu to help recover some of his energy, he realized with a shock that h couldn’t.

_I don’t have any aura!_

Alarm pierced him, and he tried using Ten to verify what he was feeling. But once again, he found he didn’t have enough aura to do even the most basic tasks.

_Have I lost all of my aura?... No, that can’t be it._

Looking over at the man lying limp next to him, he knew he could still feel his Judgement Chain binding his heart. As long as that was in place, it meant Kurapika’s Nen still existed. If it didn’t, the aura infusing the chain would grow so weak it would be ejected by the contractions of the heart, and fall loosely away.

Kurapika sighed, he really had overdone it this time, _but it’s not like I had a choice anyway, I couldn’t just let him die there._

 

Some time late that evening, Machi returned. This time, Feitan and Shalnark accompanied her. She came to stand next to Kurapika, who had grown drowsy and was only awake to fulfill his promise to Chrollo that he’d watch over him.

Feitan stood by the foot of the bed, “He’s going to be seriously pissed off when he wakes up.”

Shalnark cringed, “Maybe he won’t remember what happened?”

Machi gave him a disbelieving look, “You really think that the boss would forget being drugged?”

Shalnark shrugged, “He was delusional, maybe we can tell him he just passed out.”

Feitan snorted, “Delusional or not, it’s the boss we’re talking about. He’s going to wear our skins for boots when he comes to.”

Shalnark made an alarmed face, “Do you think he really will?”

Machi sighed, “Probably.”

Shalnark looked to Feitan for reassurance, but only received a grim look instead.

Kurapika looked over at Shalnark, “Why would he be mad at you two?”

Shalnark gave him a guilty expression, “It was sort of our idea…”

Kurapika nodded, laying his head back down to rest. Chrollo stirred a bit, muttering in his sleep. Shalnark watched him like a hawk, as though he expected the Spider would lung at him any moment now.

Feitan sat at the foot of the bed with a sigh, “Hey, Chain User.”

Kurapika hated to hear that name again, “What?”

Feitan turned to look at him, “Do you remember anything about what happened?”

Kurapika blinked a couple of times, “Not much… But I do remember being followed, I think.”

Feitan’s eyes narrowed, “By who?”

Kurapika shook his head, “I don’t know. I’m not even sure they were following us.”

Feitan edged closer, “No, trust your gut. You’re a sharp and perceptive person, if you felt like you were being followed, you probably were.”

Kurapika sighed, “Even so, I have no idea who it was. It was just a car I noticed way behind us. I only remembered it because it was the only other car on the road.”

Feitan mulled for a moment, “Could you see what color it was?”

Kurapika tried to picture it, but everything was so foggy, “No, I don’t think I could see anything but it’s headlights.”

Feitan sat up a bit, “All right, what color were those? And how bright?”

Kurapika gave him a look, “They were dull and yellow, why?”

Feitan hummed a bit, “Because new cars use blue LED lights. And only weathered lights are dull and yellow.”

Kurapika looked at him, “That makes sense, but it’s not much to go on is it?”

Feitan shook his head, “That’s not necessarily true. For someone to follow the boss and not be detected means that they’re a high caliber opponent. And the explosive that was planted was incredibly complex and sophisticated, so they’re undoubtedly organized. Yet they drove an old, weathered car. Why?”

Kurapika looked at him, “I don’t know, why?”

Feitan thought for a moment, “Maybe to avoid standing out. Maybe because the car could have identified them. The bomb was sophisticated and not cheap, but it didn’t have the obvious signatures of anyone we know of in organized crime. And yet no armature could have made it, so what would make a professional change their M.O.?”

Kurapika was thinking when a new voice interrupted, “Because they knew who their target was.”

All four of them jumped, turning to look at Chrollo who was still lying there, facing away from them.

Shalnark tried to sound innocent, “Sorry, boss. Did we wake you?”

Chrollo twisted to glare at them, “Shut up, Shal. I’m still going to kill the four of you just as soon as I can feel my legs again.”

They all grimaced at each other, but Feitan turned back to him, “What did you mean by that? The fact they knew who their target was, that is.”

Chrollo hauled himself into a half sitting position, “What I mean is, everything from the car to the sophisticated yet unmarked bomb backs up the idea that they were actively hiding their identity, which means it’s personal. We know who did it, and I’ll bet the usage of a bomb was more to destroy any potential evidence that might have been left otherwise. They also knew they couldn’t snipe me, I’d hear the shot and be able to react before the bullet could reach. Any closer and I’d have detected them before they could even take a shot.”

Shalnark tipped his head, “But if they were trying to kill you, why worry about their identity? I thought people, like serial killers for example, only hid their identity if they thought you were going to survive? Otherwise, don’t they like you to see them?”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s right. But again, they knew who their target was. I don’t just mean me, they knew that if they were identified, that the remaining Spiders would come after them. And the fact they didn’t taunt us tells you what?”

Shalnark looked grim, “That they don’t want us to figure it out?”

Chrollo nodded, “Yes, but what does that tell us about who they are?”

Kurapika chimed in when Shalnark looked lost, “It means they’re afraid of you. They do they business in the shadows, and they know if you identify them that you’ll certainly kill them. And this has all the trademarks of a hitman, meaning they themselves are too weak or unskilled to pull of this task.”

Feitan’s eyes ignited, “I know who it is!”

They all turned to look at him as he stood up, “We all know who it is. Who pawns their dirty work off to hired assassins? Who has money and power, and yet is too weak to face us?”

Chrollo’s eyes grew grave, “I was coming to the same conclusion.”

Shalnark still looked confused, “I don’t understand.”

Chrollo sighed, “It’s the mafia, Shal. They had the money and power to be able to hire a hitman with the skills that they lack, they removed the markers because they knew the Troupe would retaliate hard to an attack on their leader, especially following the death of two other members.”

Feitan looked down at him, “Are you thinking that a Don brought out a Shadowbeast?”

Chrollo looked thoughtful, “I’m not sure. A Shadowbeast would be far too weak to challenge us head-on, that’s true. But I’m not sure they have the tracking and stalking abilities to have pulled this off.”

Shalnark looked grim, “Then… Are we thinking Zoldycks?”

A heavy silence followed his words, broken when Machi finally spoke, “No, I don’t think so.”

Everyone turned to look at her as Chrollo spoke, “What makes you say so? Intuition?”

Machi sighed, “Yes, there’s that. But there’s also the fact that whoever did this was a coward. They couldn’t face you directly, and the job was sloppy and incomplete, regardless of how sophisticated the bomb seemed.”

Chrollo nodded slowly, “Excellent observation, I think you’re absolutely right. A Zoldyck doesn’t fight like a coward, they’re strong and proud, they would’ve taken my head with their own two hands or not at all. And they certainly wouldn’t have left without guaranteeing I was dead.”

Feitan was staring at the ground, “Well, that doesn’t rule out a Shadowbeast. And also…”

Chrollo glanced over at him, “What is it?”

Feitan sighed, “It doesn’t rule out a traitor.”

Chrollo’s eyes narrowed, “What do you mean?”

Feitan looked pained to be suggesting it, “Well, how’d someone know when you were leaving? I highly doubt they could have been observing us this whole time without being noticed, especially since we’ve been so on edge. So, they knew when to be waiting for you, and where. We would’ve noticed a car that’s not one of our own lurking about, so they must have waited en route. But how could they do that unless they knew your point of origin as well as your destination? It sounds like someone tipped them off.”

Chrollo gazed down for a moment, “Why not wait at the restaurant then? Why risk driving at all?”

Shalnark spoke up, “Because you would have noticed them. You go there often, you would’ve noticed a car that’s out of place.”

Feitan nodded with a sigh, “That makes sense, unfortunately.”

A long, deep silence stretched out with no one speaking.

Finally, Shalnark broke it, “I think it’s Hisoka.”

Kurapika’s heart lurched, Hisoka had gotten him into this mess, but he’d also saved him.

Chrollo spoke, “What makes you think that?”

Shalnark looked away, “He’s like a two-headed snake, he looks you right in the eyes with one head while the other one bites you. He double-crossed Kurapika, why should we expect he won’t do the same to us?”

Chrollo looked thoughtful for a moment, “It’s true that I myself don’t trust Hisoka. But we’re overlooking one crucial detail, there is no traitor among us.”

Everyone looked at him in surprise, Feitan speaking first, “How can you be so sure?”

Chrollo gazed fondly at Kurapika, making his skin crawl self-consciously, “Because they didn’t know about Kurapika. They didn’t anticipate he would be with me, that’s why there was only one explosive on my side of the car. And they didn’t know about his healing abilities either. We said we thought they left without making sure the job was finished, but I think we were wrong about that. I think they **did** come back to check, and they were convinced no one would be able to heal such a horrendous wound with so little time before I died.”

Kurapika’s heart jumped, “The extra pair of prints in the snow! I could’ve sworn I remembered seeing them when I woke up, but I couldn’t really remember anything clearly enough to make sense of it.”

Chrollo nodded at him, “I thought so, too. They didn’t take into account Kurapika’s Holy Chain, but anyone within the Troupe would have made absolute certain to include that detail. It’s only because they didn’t know that I’m still alive. And as for Hisoka, I consider him much like the Zoldycks. His goal isn’t to assassinate, it’s to test his own strength against others’. He wouldn’t have hired someone to do it, he would’ve done it himself.”

Everyone nodded agreement at that, Machi speaking first, “I think you’re right. That makes far more sense.”

Feitan concluded the discussion, “And now, we know where to start. Come on Shal, we’ve got some friends to visit.”

 

…

 

Kurapika and Machi sat in a tense, awkward silence. Chrollo had torn them both a new one in his fury over the fact he’d been drugged. Kurapika sat there, messing with the hem of the blanket since he still couldn’t stand up. Machi was ‘examining’ his wound yet again, both of them clearly trying to avoid Chrollo’s wrath. He was fuming, and Kurapika had never imagined someone could manage to look so furious while they read.

He didn’t dare interrupt, focusing instead on Machi, “Do you know why it isn’t healing.”

He was aware of the breakneck glare that Chrollo shot the two of them, though he said nothing.

Machi shivered, but addressed Kurapika, “Yeah, your aura is extinguished.”

Kurapika could feel Chrollo’s anger soften with concern as he spoke to them, “What’s that mean for him?”

Machi sighed, “Well, it’s not good. I don’t think he’s permanently destroyed his ability to use his nen, but he’s done severe damage to his body. He’s got his vital functions still working, but his aura is so faint that I doubt he can even use Ten or Zetsu.”

Kurapika cringed, knowing she was right as Chrollo stood up to come sit next to him, “Will he recover?”

Machi’s eyes were dark, “Normally, I would say no. But Kurapika has proven himself exceptional in the past, so I think there’s hope for him.”

Chrollo gave him a mournful look as he politely dismissed Machi from the room.

He let out a desolate sigh, pressing against Kurapika, “You never should have done that.”

Kurapika leaned into him, relishing the warmth that reminded him he was still alive, “I can live without my Nen. But I could never have lived with myself if I’d let you die without doing everything I could to save you.”

Chrollo enfolded him in an embrace, making him sigh as his tiredness caught up to him, “You should rest, you look exhausted.”

Kurapika gave him a weary smile, “Will you sleep with me?”

Chrollo had looked far better when he’d awakened, the color had returned to his face and his eyes were brighter, but Kurapika guessed he’d still need some more sleep.

With a sigh, Chrollo laid down next to him, “All right.”

Kurapika snuggled into him, grateful that he seemed to be handling the trauma better by the day. As he lie there absorbing Chrollo’s affection and concern, he had to admit honestly that his heart was aching desperately at the thought of losing his Nen. He’d tried to sound strong and unmoved when he spoke to Chrollo, but truthfully, he was terrified and heartbroken at the thought. But he knew all he could do right now was give his body rest, and hope some of his aura would start slowly returning to him.

Chrollo seemed to sense his worry, because he stroked his hair gently, “You hear Machi, you are exceptional. I have no doubt that you’ll recover your Nen, and be even stronger than you were before. So just close your eyes and sleep, I’ll be here when you wake up, and then we can figure everything out.”

 

…

 

Kurapika was lounging with his injured leg elevated on a stack of pillows. Chrollo looked deep in thought as he massaged a muscle relaxant into his thigh. Kurapika felt rather bashful every time he did this, it had a certain kind of intimacy they hadn’t really shared until now. Whether or not he was feeling shy, Kurapika was grateful to find some relief from the painful cramps that had begun savaging his leg as it had reluctantly healed. He’d been in constant pain as his body began to recover some of its aura, but though it had already been a week since he’d woken from his coma, the change in his aura was undetectable.

He sighed as Chrollo gave a particularly firm press, feeling the knotted muscle finally relax beneath his strong but mindful hands. His muscles had been cramping uncontrollably, locking up for hours at a time with no end in sight. But Chrollo had been kind to him despite his earlier stunt with Machi, and for that he was very grateful.

As he watched him work with a tense expression, Kurapika spoke to him, “Is something wrong?”

Chrollo looked jarred from his thoughts, “What?”

Kurapika sighed, he hadn’t been sleeping well, “You look worried.”

Chrollo gazed back a bit vacantly, “I’m just tense. There’s a lot to figure out right now.”

He patted Kurapika gently as he spoke as though comforting him.

Kurapika was grateful for this almost nurturing side of him, “Is that your excuse for not sleeping again?”

Chrollo scowled a bit, “You don’t need to worry about that, I’m doing fine.”

Kurapika huffed in exasperation, “Why must you be so difficult?”

Chrollo grumbled at him, “Says the one who’s laid up in bed because he made a devil’s deal to save me. You don’t have a lot of room to talk right now.”

Kurapika shrugged, he had a point, “Anyway, is there anything I can do to help you?”

Chrollo finished kneading the spot where the wound had once been and looked up, “I’m fine, really. I’m just worrying about you and what we’re going to do if Shalnark and Feitan can’t figure out who ordered the hit.”

Kurapika’s lip quivered, “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be all right. It took a little longer to recover without Zetsu, but it healed really well. So you don’t have to worry about me, I can handle myself now.”

Chrollo huffed, “Like you ‘handled’ yourself when you got into this mess? Or when you tried to kill yourself because it **might** save me? Or-”

Kurapika flared with indignation, “All right! I get it. I’m just saying that as much as I appreciate your care, I don’t want to burden you anymore than you already are.”

Chrollo shrugged, “And I don’t want to be a burden to you while you’re still recovering, so just take my word for it when I say I’m fine.”

Kurapika made an incensed noise, “What is it with you and refusing help?”

Chrollo made a face at him, “I can ask you the same thing!”

Kurapika wanted to retort, but he just giggled instead, “You’re so stubborn.”

Chrollo took in his smile for a moment before replying, “And you’re not, is that right?”

They both broke into smiles at the same time, shaking their heads.

Chrollo cocked a brow at him, “You really are something.”

Kurapika blushed suddenly, the two hadn’t exactly been flirting in the past week, and he had become sensitive to Chrollo’s compliments.

But it wasn’t a bad feeling, it made him feel warm and happy as he replied, “You’re a piece of work yourself.”

Chrollo sighed with a happy, though tired, look, “Sorry I’ve been so difficult.”

Kurapika felt all his frustration melt away, “It’s all right. I know you’re having a hard time, anyone would be. That’s why I want to help.”

Chrollo gave him a soft look, “I know, I appreciate it.”

With another sigh, he came to lay next to Kurapika, who rolled onto his now relaxed leg and squeezed his arms around him. Chrollo exhaled in a yearning fashion, tucking his head into Kurapika’s chest and nuzzling him.

 

He didn’t sleep, but Kurapika was glad he was at least allowing himself to rest and relax. Kurapika caressed him, relishing the way the strain melted out of his muscles. A few hours passed with Kurapika dozing lightly and Chrollo resting his eyes and body.

Kurapika felt him stir, running his fingers through that sleek but wispy black hair. He smiled a bit, noticing how much it had grown out since their first meeting.

Chrollo smiled a bit, “That feels nice.”

Kurapika leaned forwards, burying his face into Chrollo’s hair and curling his fingers to scratch him gently, “That’s good.”

Chrollo hummed softly, “You could put me to sleep like this.”

Kurapika laughed softly, but it gave him and idea too, “Does it really make you sleepy?”

Chrollo looked up at him, his eyes looking heavy and dark from his exhaustion, “A bit, yeah. It’s soothing.”

Kurapika continued stroking his hair, “How long has it been since you slept?”

Chrollo turned his face away, “I think… two days?”

Kurapika sighed, “It’s probably more like three, you look really tired.”

Chrollo mumbled, “Either way, it’s nothing I can’t handle.”

Kurapika stopped petting him for a moment, “I have an idea.”

Chrollo looked up at him curiously, “What idea?”

Kurapika burned a little, not sure he wanted to share what he was thinking.

Chrollo chuffed sweetly, “I can hear your heartbeat speeding up, just tell me.”

Kurapika patted him, putting on a more confident façade than he felt, “There’s something we haven’t tried. Something I think can put you right to sleep.”

He gave his hair a light tug, feeling the smile spread across his face, “Oh, yeah? What’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours?”

Kurapika squirmed a bit, “You know exactly what I’m suggesting.”

Chrollo hummed, “I think I follow.”

Kurapika patted him, “If you’re not feeling up to it, that’s fine.”

Chrollo laughed softly, “Don’t worry, my sweet little canary, I’m always up for that.”

Kurapika felt him shift his weight off to one side, “Canary? How many nicknames are you going to give me?”

Chrollo smiled at him, “As many as I feel suit you. Unless you don’t like them?”

Kurapika eyed him, making Chrollo smile wider, “Or, is it just that they turn you on?”

Kurapika gripped him in a hug, taking in his scent as he did, “I’m inclined to say it’s the latter.”

Chrollo snuck a kiss against his neck, “That’s good, I’m glad. But what about you? Are you sure you’re feeling okay?”

Kurapika kept quiet for a moment until he felt Chrollo look up at him curiously. As soon as his weight shifted, Kurapika gave a hard shove with his hips and threw his weight over Chrollo’s, landing atop him.

Chrollo let out a small grunt, but Kurapika planted a firm kiss to his lips, earning him a soft and mildly startled moan. It turned to a pleasant sigh within an instant as Chrollo closed his eyes and welcomed the kiss. He was more subdued than usual, lazily opening his mouth and allowing Kurapika to take charge of the kiss. Kurapika was more than happy to oblige him, forcing his tongue more roughly after a moment, and taking in the way Chrollo pressed up to meet him. He drew back a bit, admiring how content Chrollo looked as sighed, keeping his eyes closed.

Kurapika brushed his thumb over Chrollo’s cheek, watching the smile grace his face though his eyes stayed closed, “Are you sure about this? You look awfully tired.”

Chrollo furrowed his brow, “Oh, come on. Don’t get me like this and then just leave me laying here.”

Kurapika hummed, “If you’re sure.”

Chrollo grabbed his hand and kissed it, “I’m sure. I think it’s the perfect solution for my insomnia.”

Kurapika leaned back in, pausing for a moment to look into his eyes before reconnecting their kiss. He took Chrollo’s bottom lip between his teeth, sucking on it and pulling a sweet moan from Chrollo.

Kurapika pressed his lips to Chrollo’s ear, making him writhe as he spoke, “Tell me what you want, and I’ll give it to you. But only if you ask.”

Chrollo’s eyes blackened with desire, “You’re going to make me beg for it? How cruel.” Kurapika pressed his tongue to his ear, eliciting a sharp gasp and hot moan, “God, that feels so good.”

Kurapika could feel the way Chrollo’s hands dropped to his hips, pulling himself up and grinding into Kurapika.

Kurapika drew back a bit, breathing into his ear and feeling the way he panted at the contact, “Not so cruel now, am I?” Chrollo laughed softly, breaking off in a gasp as Kurapika began kissing his neck, “Your skin’s gonna bruise easily, is that okay?”

Chrollo ground himself into him again, “Oh, please do.”

Kurapika sucked hard at the skin, biting and pressing his tongue over the bite marks. Chrollo brought one of his hands up, tangling his fingers into Kurapika’s hair and gripping a handful of it. He pulled Kurapika closer and lower, urging him on with short, breathy moans. Kurapika happily engaged him for a while, marking his neck with enthusiasm as he worked his way lower while running his hands beneath his shirt. Kurapika sunk his teeth into his skin, sucking hard until the skin was purple, Chrollo jerking his hips hard upward as he whimpered.

Kurapika hummed in contentment, “You’re so needy all of a sudden. What happened to the big, strong man who never needs anything from anyone?”

Chrollo squirmed, giving him a look that was a mix of arousal and arrogance, “Mm, I don’t know. Why don’t you figure that out and get back to me? I’d love to hear your answer.”

Kurapika drew back a way, wrapping his hand around Chrollo’s throat and curling his fingernails into the skin, “You’re gonna make me wipe that smug look off your face by force, aren’t you?”

Chrollo furrowed his brows in mock innocence, puffing out his lip, “Smug? I don’t know what you’re talking about, I’m at your _mercy._ ”

Kurapika smiled, running his thumb over Chrollo’s lips as he did, “You sound ready to beg for me already, is that really all you’ve got?”

Chrollo whined, “Can you blame me? I’m exhausted and having a hard time and I’ve got an absolute hellcat pinning me down ready to do with me as he pleases. Who wouldn’t be inclined to your every wish?”

Kurapika shook his head a little, opting to kiss him while he squeezed his throat tightly instead of answering him. Chrollo sighed pleasantly, lifting himself as Kurapika began easing his shirt off. Kurapika pulled it the rest of the way off, trailing his fingers over his chest and then lower. As his fingers brushed over his abdomen, he noticed the immediate tension arise in Chrollo.

He paused with concern, “Are you okay? I’ll stop if you want, just let me know.”

Chrollo sighed, the tension dropping some, “Actually, that’s the last thing I want you to do.”

Kurapika placed a soft kiss to his chest, “What do you mean?”

Chrollo ran his fingers over Kurapika’s shoulders, “I’m still a little sensitive right there, but I know it’s just in my head. I was thinking, maybe feeling you touch me can erase that other… feeling.”

Kurapika gazed down at him, sympathy filling his eyes, “Is that really okay? I don’t want to…”

As he trailed off, Chrollo smiled softly, taking his hands and pressing them back to his abdomen, “Don’t want to take advantage of me? You’re not. I’ve been wanting this all week, but I wanted to be sure you were healed before I said anything. But you took the initiative, and I’m happily along for the ride.”

When Kurapika still hesitated, he reached up and pulled him closer so that he could speak into his ear, “I want this. I want you.”

Kurapika drew a deep breath at how silky his voice was, “All right, I trust you. Now, relax and let me take care of you.”

Chrollo smiled, letting his body go limp after he brought his hands above his head, putting him in a completely vulnerable position. Kurapika pressed gentle kisses over his torso, trailing his fingers over his ribs. He could feel Chrollo’s breathing grow a bit quicker as he reached his abdomen. Chrollo watched him for a moment through lowered eyes, but he soon laid his head back down and relaxed some. Kurapika brought his hands down to his waist, paying extra attention to his front length by trailing his lips over the skin and placing firm, slow kisses as he went.

Chrollo had begun to relax before he drew a sharp breath suddenly, “It hurts.”

Kurapika sat up a bit, “Are you okay? Do you want me to stop?”

Chrollo shook his head, though he grimaced again, “No, please don’t stop. I know it’s not real, I just need you to help snap me out of it.”

Kurapika sighed, brushing his hands over the skin and watching Chrollo’s tense expression. He paused for a moment, wondering if this was really the right approach when an idea struck him.

Touching his hand to Chrollo’s cheek, he spoke, “Do you still have that massage oil you were using? The muscle relaxer for my leg?”

Chrollo’s eyes lit with understanding, “Yeah, it’s in a little pile of things in the corner there.”

Kurapika stood up, heading to where Chrollo had gestured and picking out the bottle of oil. He returned to straddle Chrollo, resting his weight carefully onto him, and taking note of Chrollo’s already noticeable arousal. He poured some of the oil into his palm, warming it up before he allowed it to run off his hand and onto Chrollo’s abdomen.

Chrollo folded his arms under his head, closing his eyes and looking up, away from his torso as Kurapika began to smooth the oil around.

Kurapika glanced at him, “Do you want to see what I’m doing?”

Chrollo shook his head, “It’s worse when I can’t see my body, easier to imagine the wound’s still there. I figure I can probably get faster results by looking away while you work.”

Kurapika nodded, though Chrollo’s eyes were closed. He worked slowly and gently at first, gradually pressing more firmly and measuring every one of Chrollo’s reactions to his touch. Chrollo still glanced down occasionally, but he didn’t show any signs of pain again.

 

Kurapika pressed his thumbs down in circles, massaging the oil into the muscles along the line where his injury had once been. Chrollo sighed into the touch, and Kurapika could feel the way his firm muscles rippled as the tension slowly began to leave them.

Chrollo drew a slow, deep breath, “This feels nice.”

Kurapika leaned down, pressing his lips into the now loose muscle, “That’s good.”

As he spoke, he began fondling Chrollo’s belt with his hands, working it undone.

Chrollo smiled down at him, “About time.”

Kurapika pulled his belt away with a mischievous grin, “Patience.”

Kurapika placed teasing bites over his chest as he unbuttoned Chrollo’s pants. He flicked his tongue over the more sensitive of Chrollo’s nipples, making him moan and drive his hips into Kurapika’s abdomen.

Kurapika nipped his skin as he felt Chrollo’s erection press into him, “Already so excited, and I haven’t even touched you there.”

When Chrollo gazed down at him through highly aroused eyes, he added, “You really are pathetic and needy.”

Chrollo tossed his head back with a moan and a wide smile, wrapping his leg over Kurapika’s.

Kurapika lightly shook his head, _who’d have thought that Chrollo of all people has a degradation kink?_

 But he wasn’t about to complain, he liked it too, “Tell me what you want.”

Chrollo hummed, “I want you to have your way with me.”

Kurapika ran his tongue from Chrollo’s chest to right beneath his ear, “Then beg for me.”

Chrollo whined at him, “I’ll beg for you when you earn it.”

Kurapika was miffed, _does he want to be submissive or dominant? I can never tell._

But Kurapika knew exactly how to deal with this, “Suit yourself.”

He sat up, lifting his weight off Chrollo and getting to his feet, “I’m just gonna go eat then. Maybe you won’t be so stubborn and difficult when I get back.”

Chrollo gazed at him with wide eyes, confused and enamored by the fact Kurapika had actually left him there.

He grunted, speaking to himself as he adjusted his pants, “Damn…”

He laid back down, all he could do was wait for Kurapika to return.

 

 

When Kurapika did return, Chrollo was lying propped on his elbow, reading a book. He had his back to the door, and he gave no greeting as Kurapika stepped into the room. Kurapika paused for a moment, then realized he was being intentionally ignored. After long moments of silence, accented by the occasional noisy flip of a page, Kurapika shook his head in disbelief.

Kurapika snorted at him, “Are you seriously throwing a fit right now?”

Chrollo took his time replying, loudly flipping another page, “Mhm.”

Kurapika couldn’t stifle his laugh, “Unbelievable.”

Chrollo lifted one had as though to beckon Kurapika, but instead, he folded three fingers down and flipped him off wordlessly.

Kurapika broke into laughter, “Aww, did I hurt your feelings? Leaving you all alone in the big, scary room-”

Kurapika should’ve known what was coming next as Chrollo hurled a pillow with blinding speed. It slammed against the wall with an alarming amount of force, though Kurapika knew he was only playing.

Chrollo grumbled at him, “No, you hurt my dick, not my feelings.”

Kurapika snickered, “It was your fault for being so hard-headed. Besides, I brought you a peace offering.”

Chrollo twisted to look at him, his tantrum forgotten, “You brought me something?”

Kurapika crossed over to where he was lying, handing him a small bowl, “Of course I did. So stop throwing your tantrum and eat with me.”

Chrollo’s eyes lit up immediately as he saw what Kurapika had brought, “Is that?”

Kurapika nodded, “Mhm, caramel pudding. Though, it’s just vanilla pudding with caramel syrup.”

He hadn’t finished speaking before Chrollo put a spoonful into his mouth, “Mm, thanks.”

Kurapika shook his head, though he could feel the burn in his cheeks from smiling, “Incredible. I’ve never met someone so fickle.”

Chrollo swallowed, “My greatest weakness is caramel pudding. You feed me this stuff, I’ll do whatever you want.”

Kurapika gave him a mischievous look, “Ah, so like a pacifier?”

Chrollo glared at him, the spoon still in his mouth, but he just grunted and ignored him.

 

With peace restored between the two of them, Kurapika set the bowls to the side of the bed. Chrollo’s reaction to being left told him everything he needed to know about what to do next.

He stood up, standing directly in front of Chrollo as he did, “Lay down.”

Chrollo cocked a brow, but the light in his eyes sold him out, “Oh? What if I don’t feel like it? Will you leave me again?”

Kurapika gripped his throat just under his chin with a firm hold, “I wasn’t asking.”

He gave him a light but purposeful shove backwards. Chrollo allowed himself to fall back onto the bed, his eyes darkening with lust.

When he spoke, his voice was sultry and a smile was taunting at his lips, “Ah, I like this side of you.”

Kurapika leaned over him, placing his hand over his windpipe and leaning his weight down until he could see Chrollo’s face begin to grow red from the strain.

He hovered face to face with him, letting his hair fall down against Chrollo’s skin as he spoke, “You will beg for me, because I won’t leave you any other choice.”

Chrollo’s eyes lowered as Kurapika brought his thigh up against his groin, “Is that right? I can’t wait.”

Kurapika pressed his thigh roughly against his erection, watching the way Chrollo’s pupils dilated at the sensation, and a soft moan passed his lips. Kurapika shoved his fingers into Chrollo’s mouth, cutting off the sweet sound he had made while he began rubbing his knee into Chrollo’s cock. Chrollo sucked eagerly at his fingers, looking terribly pleased as he did.

Kurapika withdrew his fingers, landing a slap using only the two of them against the side of Chrollo’s mouth and earning an excited grunt.

He worked his fingers against the sides of his neck, pressing his knee down until Chrollo’s face screwed up with the erotic pain, “Disgustingly pathetic. Don’t you have any shame?”

Chrollo’s lips quivered happily, “With you? I have absolutely none.”

Kurapika fought his smile back, beginning to pull Chrollo’s still unbuttoned pants away. Chrollo lifted himself up, making it easier and watching Kurapika through lustful dark eyes.

Once he was stripped, Kurapika straddled him, only allowing himself to brush tantalizingly against him. Chrollo whined a bit, trying to pull Kurapika down so that he would be flush against him, but Kurapika swatted his hands away, grabbing his wrists.

He gazed down firmly at him, chiding him, “Ah ah, I didn’t give you permission to touch me. If you want that, you have to show me how desperate you are first.”

Chrollo had never looked so aroused, “I will, just tell me what you want me to do and I will do it.”

Kurapika squeezed his wrists tightly, “You don’t get to use your hands until I tell you.”

Chrollo closed his eyes, making a desperately excited face, “How cruel, you’re right here in all your beauty and yet I can’t touch you with my hands. It feels like torture.”

Kurapika withdrew long enough to undress himself, keeping his eyes fixed on Chrollo was laying with a passive but provoked look. He straddled Chrollo again, once more hovering just above his erection.

Chrollo eyed him hungrily, but Kurapika still wouldn’t let him use his hands, “If you want it, work for it.”

Chrollo grunted, but he conceded. Thrusting his hips upward in order to press his erection to Kurapika’s, releasing soft moans at every contact. He pressed up desperately trying to satisfy his urges, but like a dream where he could never quite satisfy himself, it only left him craving more.

Kurapika stayed where he was, watching how hard Chrollo was willing to work for even an inkling of pleasure.

He pressed his hands to Chrollo’s hips, holding him still, “So needy.”

Chrollo made a face now that he couldn’t move his hips, “Yes, I am.”

Kurapika leaned down without warning, kissing his erection with those soft lips of his. Chrollo drew a sharp gasp, instinctively reaching down to hold Kurapika.

Kurapika slapped his hand, “You don’t get to touch.”

Chrollo grunted, “Right…”

Kurapika began teasing his cock with soft kisses, sucking at the skin and pressing his tongue in circular motions. Chrollo moaned, forcing his hands not to try and grab as much of Kurapika as they could reach.

Kurapika teased him endlessly, watching the way his abdomen became soaked from his excitement. He gave him a hard nip, making Chrollo gasp in pain before he ran his fingers through the fluid that was running down his sides and pooling between his muscles. Kurapika touched his fingers together, stretching them apart and admiring how wet and sticky they were.

He held his fingers to Chrollo’s face, “You’re already soaked. Not an ounce of self-control.”

Chrollo looked incredibly pleased as Kurapika forced his fingers back into Chrollo’s mouth.

He made sure to work his fingers through every inch, “Tell me, do you like the way you taste?”

Chrollo moaned, trembling as excitement shook him at those words. Kurapika withdrew his fingers long enough for him to reply, “As a matter of fact, I do.”

Kurapika gripped his jaw, making him hold his tongue out as he ran his fingers through the precum that drenched him once more. He smeared it over the length of his tongue, never taking his eyes away from Chrollo as he did.

He squeezed him tighter, “Describe yourself to me.”

Chrollo moaned, seeming thrilled by the prospect, “Sweeter than I would’ve thought. That’s probably because of my sweet tooth.”

Kurapika drew back some, it was incredibly sexy to see the way Chrollo took his treatment. Rocking his weight back and resting it over Chrollo’s thighs, he reached a hand down and stroked Chrollo agonizingly slowly. Chrollo huffed desperately, forcing his hands to stay still as he tried thrusting his hips into Kurapika’s hand.

Kurapika allowed him to pleasure himself for a while before stopping him, “Go get the oil from earlier.”

Chrollo gave a woeful look to where Kurapika had released him, but he complied. Kurapika watched him, marveling at that powerful frame as he returned with the small bottle.

Kurapika laid him down again slicking his fingers with the oil before lifting one of Chrollo’s legs and resting it on his shoulder. Chrollo’s eyes narrowed with anticipation as Kurapika worked one finger in. Chrollo sighed into the sensation as Kurapika added a second finger and thrusted into him.

He kept his palm facing upward, curling his fingers as he worked them back and forth, making Chrollo twist his face and gasp with the pleasure as he brushed that sweet spot. Chrollo gripped the blankets around him, clearly struggling to abide Kurapika’s ‘no hands’ rule.

He cried out shamelessly at a particularly well aimed thrust from Kurapika’s fingers, “Oh! Please, go harder.”

Kurapika slowed his pace, making Chrollo whimper at the loss, “Are you begging for it?”

Chrollo rocked his hips to meet Kurapika’s fingers, “Yes, I am.”

Kurapika stopped moving entirely, “You don’t sound desperate enough.”

Chrollo whined, moving his hips harder against Kurapika’s hand, “I am, please give it to me harder.”

Kurapika decided to grant his wish, gripping his raised thigh and digging his fingernails into the skin as hard as he could before fingering the man aggressively. Chrollo threw his head back and moaned loudly, his leg trembling in Kurapika’s hold.

He curled his fingers in a flicking motion against Chrollo’s sweet spot, making the man writhe, “Kurapika, you’re gonna make me come like this.”

Kurapika scored his nails across his skin, “No, you don’t get to release until I tell you so.”

Chrollo made something that sounded like he was choking, “Then will you please fuck me? I’m begging you.”

Kurapika shivered, seeing the man so needy and submissive turned him on more than he ever thought possible. He withdrew his hand, earning a pathetic whine. He gripped Chrollo’s hair, pulling him into a sitting position while Kurapika laid on his back. He coaxed Chrollo on top of him so that the he was straddled. Chrollo was panting, his eyes barely open through the lust and desire that weighed them down.

Kurapika pulled him down closer, still gripping those black locks, “You’re going to pleasure yourself using my body, and you still don’t have my permission to touch me nor are you allowed to come until I tell you that you may, do you understand?”

Chrollo moaned without shame, making a face that told Kurapika he was going to burst from the dirty talk alone, “I understand,” with bountiful mischief suddenly blazing in his eyes, he added, “I promise I’ll be good for you.”

Kurapika squirmed and made a face, even when he wanted to be submissive, Chrollo wouldn’t miss the opportunity to make Kurapika burn for him.

Kurapika picked up the bottle, making sure he was thoroughly drenched as he eased Chrollo onto him. Chrollo’s face screwed up at first, but Kurapika could see the pleasure he derived from that pain as clear as day in his steel grey eyes.

He rested his weight down, biting his lip for a moment, “Kurapika, can I use my hands for support?”

Kurapika was thoughtful for a moment, “Yes, but only for support. If you break that rule, I’ll make you use only your legs.”

Chrollo chuffed, “I won’t break the rules.”

He leaned back, bracing his hands over Kurapika’s legs as he eased himself slowly into a rhythm. Kurapika was transfixed, damn did he look good like that. Coupled with the powerful sensations that pulsed through him at Chrollo’s every move, he allowed himself soft huffs now and again. He couldn’t let go of his control yet, Chrollo wasn’t in complete submission, and until he was, Kurapika would hold on to himself.

Chrollo bit his lip as he sped up, moving his hips in fuller motions. His lips parted as breathy gasps escaped him, “You feel so good.”

Kurapika swallowed hard, forcing down the intense pleasure that his words brought as he watched Chrollo satisfy his desires.

Chrollo tipped his head back, moaning freely towards the ceiling with a look of pure ecstasy on his face, “So good…”

Kurapika admired the way Chrollo’s precum flowed over his abdomen as the man rode him. It was hot as it ran down his sides, betraying Chrollo’s incredibly aroused state.

Kurapika touched his hand to Chrollo’s cock, making him grind his teeth in pleasure as he spoke, “You really are my little bitch, aren’t you? Soaking yourself while you ride me, desperately trying to get off on my cock.”

Chrollo let out a throaty wail hearing that, dropping forward and supporting himself against Kurapika’s chest. He brought his face close to Kurapika’s, moving himself fast and hard on Kurapika’s erection. Kurapika choked down his own moans, parting his lips and staring breathlessly at Chrollo, who’s face betrayed his immense pleasure while his voice cried out loudly.

Kurapika could feel his control slipping, Chrollo was just too good. He slowed him down, earning a pitiful whine as he moved Chrollo off of himself.

He stood up, using the bottle of oil as an excuse to take a moment to cool off. When he’d smoothed more oil over himself, he turned back to Chrollo, who was miraculously still abiding the ‘no hands’ rule despite how painfully needy his erection looked.

Kurapika gestured at him, “Stand up and turn around.”

Chrollo smiled a bit, clearly anticipating what was coming next. He stood with his back to Kurapika, allowing the blonde man to trail his fingers over his back before he gripped him by the back of the neck.

He marveled at the way Chrollo’s body contorted under his tight grip as he bent the man over the bed. Chrollo looked thrilled as he moaned into the blankets. Kurapika took a handful of his hair, twisting it and pulling it hard as he lined himself up again. He landed a hard, stinging slap over Chrollo’s ass, earning a throaty groan from the desperate man.

Kurapika eased himself back in, “Beg for it.”

Chrollo whimpered, his words almost slurred, “I’m begging you, please fuck me.”

Kurapika landed another slap, making the man jerk in the vise-like grip in his hair, “How do you want it?”

Chrollo groaned, “Hard, and fast, and rough. I want you to savage me.”

Kurapika trembled, _damn… that’s really hot._

He said no more, but he held that grip in Chrollo’s hair as he worked up to a vicious pace. Chrollo was lost immediately to the pleasure, moaning shamelessly in his pleasure as he screwed his face up. His hands twisted in the blankets as Kurapika found a rhythm and followed it. He railed Chrollo into the mattress, watching the way he nearly screamed in pleasure, muffling it by pressed his face into the bed. Chrollo drew part of the blanket to his mouth, biting down hard as his body was ravaged with ecstatic sensations, pleasure ripping through him from head to toe and making his world turn white in his blissful trance. Kurapika felt the change in him, this was submission. He leaned down, yanking Chrollo’s hair and forcing him into a dolphin pose. He sank his teeth into the muscle that ran between his neck and his shoulder, biting down so hard he drew a pained scream from Chrollo. A single well of blood sprung up from the deep bite mark left in his wake.

Pressing his lips to Chrollo’s ear as the man beneath him gasped in desperation, he spoke in a low, rough voice, “Look at you, you’re filthy. You’re just a needy little bitch, you’re **my** needy little bitch!”

Chrollo cried out, “Yes! Do it just like that! I’m yours! I’m your bitch!”

Kurapika pulled his hair so hard that Chrollo choked, his eyes watery as Kurapika slammed into him over and over again.

His voice was a desperate, throaty plea when he spoke, “Please! Oh, just like that! Kurapika! Please!”

Kurapika’s voice sounded more like a growl as he continued to let his feral, carnal desire overwhelm him, “Please what? Beg for it!”

Chrollo wailed at a particularly rough shot to his sweet spot, “Oh please! Please let me come! I’m begging, I’m begging you!”

Kurapika yanked him back a slight amount, reaching his free hand to stroke Chrollo’s cock firmly. Chrollo let out a desperate sound, his words slurred. Kurapika could feel his own climax descending on him as the tension built in his lower abdomen and the heat seared through him. He leaned close to Chrollo’s ear as he spoke, “I give you permission.”

Chrollo was blinded in rapture as he cried out. Kurapika closed his eyes, focusing on the mind-blowing sensations that were coursing through him and allowing them to take him over.

He felt Chrollo’s erection swell a moment before he orgasmed, letting out an elated scream into the room as he trembled violently in the wake of it. The tension of his body seized Kurapika, sending him careening over the edge with a long, loud cry of his own.

His muscles quivered as his head cleared. Chrollo was still lying there, his eyes unfocused and swollen, wet lips parted as he panted in his post-orgasm haze. Kurapika finally hauled himself off of Chrollo, feeling his legs threaten to give out an any moment.

Chrollo managed to roll onto his back, still looking completely spent as his chest rose and fell in ever slower motions. Kurapika smiled a but, this look suited the man well.

 

…

 

Chrollo was snoring, splayed out and completely relaxed. Kurapika had dozed for a while too, but Chrollo looked like he’d fallen down the rabbit hole. They had just managed to get half-dressed before they gave up and collapsed onto the bed together. Kurapika had laid his head on Chrollo’s chest, running his hand over his abdomen in slow circles, and for the first time since his injury, Chrollo had sighed happily into the touch, falling deeper into relaxation and comfort.

Now, Kurapika sat up reading while Chrollo had swaddled himself in blankets and was curled up against Kurapika. Every now and then, Kurapika found himself stroking his arm as he enjoyed his sleeping company. His idea had actually worked.

 

Hours later, Feitan and Shalnark stopped by. Chrollo was still fast asleep, so Kurapika spoke to them.

Shalnark looked at him, “We just came to check in. Unfortunately, we haven’t learned much more.”

Feitan added, with a critical gaze down at his leader, “We came to ask what we should do next, but if he’s finally sleeping, we won’t disturb him.”

Kurapika nodded, “I’ll tell him you stopped by when he wakes up.”

Shalnark smiled and thanked him, but Feitan’s eyes narrowed sharply as he stared down at Chrollo’s sleeping figure. Kurapika felt chilled when he realized, _Feitan definitely knows._

Feitan’s eyes ripped away from Chrollo, boring into Kurapika’s as he stood there in critical silence. But Kurapika knew his heart, he knew what he felt, and he held no shame for it. Lifting his head, he met Feitan’s glare directly. For a long moment, neither of them blinked or looked away, they stood perfectly still in their challenge. Kurapika felt certainty course through him, _fine. Let him know. Let him see **exactly** what’s been going on._

When the painfully tense moment passed, Feitan finally closed his eyes, drawing a deep breath before heaving a heavy sigh, “So that’s what’s been going on…”

Kurapika still stared right at him, “That’s right.”

Feitan squinted at him, lifting his brows, “You’re certainly direct. Well, anyway,” Feitan seemed to reach acceptance as he turned to leave, “Let him know we were here.”

 

Kurapika sighed as Feitan closed the door behind him. He gazed down at Chrollo, still snoring blissfully. A faint smile touched his lips as he reached down and stroked Chrollo’s hair. Chrollo just sighed softly, sinking deeper into sleep.

 

 


	13. Collision

            Kurapika spent his days lounging with Chrollo while he waited to see if his aura would recover. Shalnark and Feitan had continued digging into the mafia, attempting to pinpoint exactly who had the information needed to order the hit. Chrollo had stayed at a secondary base, organizing the Spiders and keeping track of everyone’s activities and movements while they operated. At least two members stayed in close proximity at all times, and the Spiders were under orders to operate in units, never alone.

Kurapika was growing gradually depressed. Another week had passed, probably more, and Kurapika could hardly feel the change in his aura. He worked every day, walking through the steps he’d taken when he first began learning Nen. Chrollo had told him that it was working, that he could see Kurapika’s aura faintly radiating once more. What he hadn’t said is what Kurapika suspected, that his aura was that of a person who had never learned Nen to begin with. He didn’t ask Chrollo though, he didn’t really want the answer. Instead, Kurapika had begun to brace himself for the potential that his Nen would never recover.

At the moment, however, Kurapika was focusing on Chrollo. He was pacing anxiously, biting his thumb while he spoke on the phone with Shalnark. The two had been lounging and reading when he’d gotten a text from Shalnark. Kurapika had seen his concern immediately and it was followed by the response ‘Not over text, call me.’ from Chrollo.

Kurapika could only guess that they had news on who hired the assassin. Judging by Chrollo’s unusually agitated state, it seemed Kurapika was right, and that the news wasn’t good.

Chrollo stopped biting at his thumb, “All right, thank you Shal. Be careful.”

He hung up with a heavy sigh while Kurapika watched him, “What’s up?”

Chrollo gave himself a shake, coming to sit next to Kurapika, “Nothing good.”

Kurapika gave him a look, “Have you got a lead?”

Chrollo took a long pause, making Kurapika a bit nervous, “We’ve got something. We know where the money came from, we’re still looking for where the orders came from. Unfortunately, I have a good idea who it is.”

Kurapika cocked a brow, “Why is that bad?”

Chrollo twirled his phone, “Because it was the Lusko mafia who wired the money. And they don’t operate unless their Don orders it.”

Kurapika’s blood flared at just hearing of the mafia, “Sorry, I still don’t get why knowing that information is a bad thing?”

Chrollo tapped his phone to his palm, making a face, “The information is fine, it’s what it implies that concerns me. The Lusko mafia has the money and the resources for massive operations…”

He gave a sickeningly guilty look over at Kurapika who avoided his eyes and swallowed hard, trying to ignore the shot of hatred that pierced him.

Chrollo continued only a moment later, “That much is obvious, anyway. What I’m concerned about is what they’ll do now. They’re not going to be happy that I survived, so they’ll step up their efforts, probably before we can retaliate.”

Kurapika hummed, still feeling some anger bubbling inside of him, though he didn’t want to direct it at Chrollo, “Then they’ll act soon, right? I mean you’re pretty hot on their trail, they must be feeling the pressure.”

Chrollo nodded slowly, still giving Kurapika that look, “That’s right. And I’m worried that they’re going to hit a whole lot harder this time.”

Kurapika shifted, “How much harder could they hit? They sent a Shadowbeast didn’t they? I thought those were their top dogs?”

Chrollo looked away, “Within the mafia, they are. But the mafia only employs them for quiet business, if they really need a job done, like they do now, they’ll hire some real professionals.”

Kurapika felt chilled, “Like the Zoldycks?”

Chrollo drew a deep breath, “God help us if they choose to do that. We and the Zoldycks have a sort of unspoken agreement, we stay out of each other’s way.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, “But you recently launched an attack on the Zoldycks…”

Chrollo gave him a grave look, “That’s precisely what scares me. Normally, the Zoldycks couldn’t be paid enough to go after us, and vice versa. But now, they may be keening for revenge just enough to take the job for the right price. And the mafia can name that price.”

Kurapika shivered, “So, what do we do?”

Chrollo sighed, “We can’t move until we know more, we’re already at a secondary base and all Troupe movements are going directly through me, there’s not much else we can do right now.”

Kurapika glanced at him disbelievingly, “We’re just going to sit and wait for them to find us?”

Chrollo gave a half shrug, “If we move now, we’ll leave a trail to follow. The art of hiding in plain sight is to know when to flee and when to hunker down.”

Kurapika still wasn’t sure if that was right, “If you say so.”

Chrollo shifted, “Trust me. I’ve been doing this since before I could talk. We’ll move when we get word from Shalnark and Feitan, that’s our signal to know when they’ve got a lock on our location. Until then, we play the waiting game, or risk falling right into a trap.”

Kurapika sighed, “I guess that makes sense. Regardless, it’s not like I’m going anywhere.”

Chrollo’s shoulders sunk hearing that, “I’m sorry about that. I wanted to let you have some sense of freedom, but I let my guard down, and now we’re back to hiding in the darkness and sleeping with one eye open.”

When Kurapika didn’t respond, Chrollo spoke quietly under his breath, “I never should have brought you here.”

Kurapika drew a sharp breath, an intense mix of emotions drowning him. On one hand, he wished the same, wished Chrollo never would have involved him, wished he never would have had these feelings inside of him. But on the other one, it hurt him to think that Chrollo regretted everything, that he wished their bond never would have existed at all.

Chrollo seemed to sense his inner turmoil, because he leaned close and spoke in a sincere whisper, “Maybe in another life… we could meet again, under better circumstances.”

Kurapika felt his breath hitch completely, “I don’t want to wait for another lifetime, I want to focus on the one I have right now. The one that’s here with you **now**.”

Chrollo’s eyes widened, but he didn’t look like he could find the words as he searched Kurapika’s gaze. Finally, he closed them lightly, leaning against Kurapika so he could rest his head on his shoulder. He stayed there for a long moment before looking up at Kurapika. Their eyes met, and Chrollo placed a soft kiss to his face. It wasn’t rough or lustful, it was warm and tender.

He drew back, grabbing Kurapika’s hand and pulling it to his face. He rested his cheek against it, squeezing it firmly as though he thought Kurapika might be ripped from him at any moment. Kurapika relaxed into the touch, it was comforting and reassuring. Chrollo released his hand, wrapping an arm around him and laying him back. Kurapika went down easily, allowing Chrollo to rest his arm over his chest. They laid there for a long time, Chrollo rubbing languid circles on his chest and burying his face into Kurapika’s hair while they lightly dozed.

Kurapika was happy to lay there with him, neither of them had left the underground hideout since the attack, and their only real company was each other. The two members who stood guard seldom interacted with them, too focused on their watch to break for more than a few moments.

Chrollo jerked suddenly, a violent fit of sneezing gripping him.

Kurapika shut his eyes tightly, “That’s disgusting!”

Chrollo sniffled hard, “I can’t help it, it’s dusty in here.”

Kurapika rubbed his hand over his face, “Did you have to sneeze on me?”

Chrollo made a face, “Sorry. I was falling asleep and it just hit me.”

Kurapika grimaced, “Oh yeah? And I was falling asleep when your spit just hit me.”

Chrollo frowned, “I said sorry. Besides, I didn’t spit on you, I covered my mouth. So stop whining.”

Kurapika smiled a bit, _oops. He caught me._

Chrollo leaned down, placing a soft kiss against him, “I’m starving, what strikes your fancy?”

Kurapika thought for a moment, “I don’t know. I’m hungry but not craving. Whatever you want sounds good.”

Chrollo hummed, “All right. I’ll be back soon.”

Kurapika gave him a look, “You’re leaving by yourself?”

Chrollo gave him a soft smile, “Don’t worry so much, I’m gonna send Shizuku.”

Kurapika relaxed some, “Good.”

Chrollo ruffled his hair, “So protective. There’s nothing for you to worry about, I’m right here and not going anywhere. I promised you I wouldn’t leave you again, I plan on keeping that.”

Kurapika burned with a sweet blush, “You’re so…”

Chrollo hummed, “So what? Soft? Sappy? Sweet?”

He leaned down over Kurapika and hummed in his ear, “Irresistible?”

Kurapika snorted, “Hardly! I was thinking annoying, weird, clingy.”

Chrollo pouted, “That’s mean, I was just trying to reassure you.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, “Yeah, you’re right. That is a bit mean, I’m sorry.”

Chrollo smiled, leaning down and kissing him softly, “I forgive you, brat.”

Kurapika squirmed a bit, sensing Chrollo’s joy at teasing him. He gave Chrollo a look out of one eye but ignored him.

Chrollo laughed quietly, “I’ll be right back.”

 

…

 

The two curled up for a content nap after they ate. Kurapika nuzzled into his chest, feeling Chrollo’s arm tighten around him. He missed having that tiny moment of freedom, but he was happy that he had Chrollo’s company, and he enjoyed their time together. Chrollo was intelligent and well-read, and Kurapika enjoyed having conversations with the man. It was stimulating and helped him forget about their small, underground dwelling.

He sighed, breathing in Chrollo’s scent and relaxing into sleep. He’d only just fallen asleep when Feitan burst through the door unannounced, a loud slam following. Chrollo was startled from sleep, his hand grabbing Kurapika’s head and shoving him protectively into the bed as though guarding him.

Kurapika grunted, “What the hell?”

Chrollo recognized Feitan, releasing his painful hold on Kurapika. He shook his head, but before he could say anything, Feitan spoke, “We need to move, now!”

Kurapika followed Chrollo in sitting up as he spoke, “What’s going on?”

Feitan was already urging him to his feet, “Shalnark’s got the car ready, I’ll explain on the way.”

Chrollo still looked confused and hazy, but he pulled Kurapika up, “All right, let’s go.”

Kurapika stumbled to his feet, following Chrollo and Feitan out. He was still groggy when Chrollo called Shizuku and Bonolenov to him, giving them orders on where to go and what to do and how to contact him when they arrived safely. The two guards left first, followed by Chrollo and Kurapika, who were ushered out by Feitan.

As he’d said, Shalnark had pulled a car around. It was a black sedan, Kurapika didn’t have time to check the make or model. It wasn’t as fancy as Chrollo’s Mercedes had been, but Kurapika could feel the engine growling beneath his feet and guessed the car could put on some horsepower if needed.

He and Chrollo were shoved into the back seat while Feitan hopped up front and Shalnark drove.

Chrollo spoke, “Did you swap the plates?”

Feitan glanced back, “Of course. And Shal screwed with the GPS, it should be bouncing off some random towers or something like that. It’s not really my thing so I left him to it.”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s fine, I trust Shal did a fine job.”

Shalnark smiled at the praise, “We’re heading northeast.”

Chrollo closed his eyes with a sigh, “That bad, huh?”

Kurapika stared from one to the other, “What do you mean?”

Feitan answered, “Northeast of here is back towards home. We have one particular hideout that way. Once we reach it, we’ll have essentially disappeared and we won’t be found again until we want to be.”

Kurapika shook his head, looking to Chrollo in the hopes of more clarity. Chrollo obliged him, “Meteor City is to the northeast. The city has no official markers, we just indicate it by general direction. From here in Yorknew, that direction is northeast. That hideout connects via a labyrinth to the heart of Meteor City, and once we reach that, we will effectively no longer exist until we leave the city.”

Kurapika nodded as Chrollo addressed Feitan, “Fei, what did you find out?”

Feitan twisted to face him, “We were about to call in and tell you we were closing in on the Lusko Don. Shal got a bad feeling, so we decided to wait it out, and when we did, we managed to intercept a call using his cell.”

Shalnark added, “Miraculously.”

Feitan nodded, “Well, we verified your theory. The Don ditched the Shadowbeasts and turned to the Zoldycks. And you were right, Silva was just eager enough to come even the score that he took the job.”

Kurapika shivered, _this is really bad…_

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, “That’s too convenient. Something’s definitely wrong.”

Feitan sighed, “Yeah, we know. But they gave him the coordinates to this hideout, so we really don’t have a choice but to move.”

Chrollo nodded slowly, “You’re right, but I still have a bad feeling about this.”

Shalnark chimed in, “We don’t know where Silva took the call from, but considering they only just gave him the coordinates, it’s reasonable to assume that he hasn’t moved yet, right? I mean, there’s no point wandering aimlessly.”

Chrollo looked thoughtful, “That is reasonable, yes. But let’s not place our stock on that.”

Feitan nodded, “Of course not, that’s why we grabbed you as soon as we were sure we didn’t have a tail.”

Chrollo leaned back with a hefty sigh, “All right. Good call. I just hope Bono and Shizuku figure out what’s going on. They’re supposed to call in, but I can’t give them any information in case the call is intercepted.”

A tense silence fell in the car, broken by Shalnark eventually, “It’s a really long drive. Fei and I are going to switch off after 10 hours or so, you should try to sleep.”

Kurapika groaned, “A 20-hour drive?”

Feitan mulled, “That’s being generous.”

Kurapika looked over to Chrollo, but he was reclined with his eyes closed. He sighed, turning to look out the window and watching the winter scene outside.

 

The first few hours were tense, no one talked and though Chrollo was leaning back, he was twirling his phone as he waited for the call from Bono and Shizuku. After a while though, Kurapika felt weariness take hold as his anxiety wore on him. He stole glances over at Chrollo, part of him longing to lean into him and rest, but another part refusing so long as Feitan and Shalnark were in the car too. He leaned back, closing his eyes and trying to rest, but his worry kept him awake. Feitan and Shalnark were still quiet but for an occasional comment back and forth about directions and Chrollo was still waiting for a call. Kurapika was about to give up when Chrollo stirred a bit, checking his phone before tucking it into his pocket.

Kurapika wasn’t going to pass an opportunity, “About when were you expecting their call?”

Chrollo looked over at him, his eyes reflecting the same tiredness that Kurapika felt, “Probably not for a while.”

Kurapika eyed him for a moment, grateful when a faint smile tugged at his lips as he looked over at him.

Chrollo reached out an arm, pulling Kurapika closer and letting him lean into his chest. Kurapika blushed, aware of Feitan’s disapproving glance. He gave a quiet snort, letting himself lean into the embrace and close his eyes, _whatever… he already knows what’s been going on._

Kurapika sighed, relaxing into him and letting himself rest. Chrollo wrapped his arm over his shoulder, almost possessively as his fingers curled into Kurapika’s muscles. Kurapika smiled softly, feeling intensely pleased that Chrollo so proudly claimed him no matter who was watching. Chrollo gave him an affirming squeeze, catching Feitan’s eye with a steady, confident look. Feitan sighed, but clearly conceded to his leader. Kurapika felt fiercely satisfied to see the way Chrollo smiled mildly, no shame or bashfulness at the way he held Kurapika.

The two relaxed, dozing off together. Kurapika relished the way his fingers gripped him, it made him feel safe and secure. His legs were cramped by what he guessed was nearing the five to six-hour mark. He shifted, trying to stretch his legs. After his joints popped, he sighed, closing his eyes again.

 

Some time had passed, Kurapika had lost track, but it had been dark outside for a long time now. He felt Chrollo shift as though growing anxious and unsettled.

Kurapika lifted his head a bit, yawning before he spoke, “Something wrong?”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, still looking out the window, “I don’t know… Just a bad feeling.”

Kurapika sat back, “Intuition?”

Chrollo shifted again, taking a moment to glance away from the window, “I feel like we’re being watched.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, “Followed?”

Chrollo turned to face him, but the words would never make it past his lips. Feitan’s voice rose sharply, though Kurapika couldn’t remember what he’d said. Kurapika looked up in time to see the dark car. All of its lights were off, and for a moment it was like everything moved in slow motion.

He didn’t remember the impact. When he woke up, dust filled the cabin, and it felt so cold. There was an instant, a brief moment, where he didn’t know what had happened. But this time, it came back to him quickly.

_We just got hit._

Frightened, he looked down at himself, running his hands from head to toe and checking for major injuries. He had blood on his shirt and arm, but it wasn’t a lot. He looked over at Chrollo, who was clearly dazed, but had no outstanding injuries.

He touched his hand to Chrollo’s shoulder, “Are you okay?”

Chrollo rubbed his face, his nose and lip bloodied, “Yeah, I think so.”

Kurapika squirmed out of the seatbelt, gently turning Chrollo’s face so he could see the injury. To his relief, it didn’t look bad.

He gently touched his other shoulder, “Does it hurt?”

Chrollo made a face, still dazed, “Nothing hurts. Yet.”

Kurapika squeezed it carefully, “Can you move it?”

Chrollo grunted, but his arm and hand moved fairly easily, “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Kurapika helped him unlatch his seatbelt, aware now of the space around him.

Chrollo leaned forward, “Shal, Fei, are you all right?”

Shalnark coughed, and Kurapika could see the dash of the car was completely destroyed as he answered, “Yeah, I think so,” he coughed again through the dust, “Feitan?”

Chrollo pulled himself further forward when there was no response. Feitan was slumped back, his eyes were open and fluttering as though he was just coming to. He groaned weakly, looking down at himself and scowling hard when his eyes settled on the ruined dash and collapsed door.

Chrollo gently touched him, “Feitan? Are you okay?”

Feitan let out a heavy breath, “I don’t know… I can’t feel anything…”

Kurapika looked more closely, he could see that it was the front right of the car that was hit, and the car was collapsed in on Feitan’s side.

Shalnark grunted as he tried to free himself, “We need to move.”

Chrollo nodded, still holding Feitan, “You’re right, can you get out?”

Shalnark shoved at the driver’s door, making what glass was left crack though the door wouldn’t budge, “The frames too bent, I can’t get the door open.”

Kurapika shoved at his door, it creaked for a moment before cracking loose. A cloud of dust billowed out as it opened.

He stepped out, still feeling weak and shaken. Shalnark followed, wincing at a fairly shallow but long wound on his calf. Chrollo lingered with Feitan, who still looked out of it.

Chrollo tried to coax him out, but Feitan just shook his head, “I’m pinned. I can’t move my legs and the dash is over my lap.”

Chrollo wiped more blood from his face, “All right… We need to get you out, we might be in danger here.”

Feitan closed his eyes with no response. Shalnark was slumped against the side of the car, looking around as though he expected someone to attack them right then and there. Kurapika followed his gaze around, the other car had come to rest in a ditch on the side of the road, and he realized that they were in a sandbank, the front end of their car crumpled as well as the side. As he watched, there was no movement from the other vehicle.

Chrollo’s voice brought him back, “Kurapika, can you help me?”

Kurapika ducked back into the car, resting his knee on the seat, “What do you need?”

Chrollo was fighting to unbuckle Feitan’s seatbelt, “I’m going to recline the seat and pull him out that way, I need you to lift the dash off of him and make sure he’s not caught on anything.”

Kurapika cringed inwardly, frightened of what he might find when he lifted the shattered dash, “All right.”

He weaseled his small frame into position beside Feitan, who gave him a look, “Hey, Chain Bastard… be gentle, please?”

Kurapika couldn’t muster any anger right now given their shock and situation, “I’ll be careful, I promise.”

Chrollo snaked his arm between the door and the seat, and dropped it back slowly, earning a grimace from Feitan. Kurapika found a hold on the dash, lifting it with one arm and bracing himself for the worst when he saw how little space there was between the dented metal and the center console, feeling certain Feitan’s legs would be broken and stuck.

Chrollo carefully took hold of Feitan, “Are you ready?”

Feitan groaned, “No… but I want you to get me out of here anyway.”

Chrollo took a breath, then began hauling Feitan back. Kurapika held the dash clear, relieved to see that he managed to slip free fairly easily now. He had to help clear his feet, but after that, Feitan was pulled clear. Chrollo helped drag him from the car, followed by Kurapika.

Feitan laid on his back in the dirt, “Oh, thank **God** I’m a midget!”

Chrollo slumped against the care, grimacing in pain as he couldn’t help but laugh despite his busted lip, “No shit huh?”

Kurapika couldn’t help a faint smile of his own, “I can’t believe that worked.”

Chrollo tapped some more blood away, “Neither can I.”

 

With the adrenaline from the crash fading, Kurapika felt suddenly dizzy and heavy. He stilled for a moment, trying to judge whether he was really about to black out. Reaching his conclusion, he quickly took hold of Chrollo and Shalnark, his legs beginning to collapse beneath him.

Chrollo lowered him down, “Are you okay?”

Kurapika let his body come to rest in the dirt next to Feitan, “Yeah, just a little dazed is all.”

Chrollo nodded, folding his arms over his chest, “All right, if you feel nauseous, let me know and we’ll get you to a hospital.”

Kurapika sighed, his dizziness rapidly fading now that he had acknowledged his bodies need to recuperate for a moment.

Feitan snickered next to him, “Welcome to the club…”

Kurapika couldn’t help but be amused, “We must look pathetic, lying in the dirt like this.”

Feitan grumbled, “We’ll never hear the end of it, that much is a guarantee.”

Kurapika felt an unusual concern for the man next to him, assuming it was due to the mutual shock they’d just received, “Your legs?”

Feitan looked mildly surprised, but not hostile, “Maybe some hairline fractures, but nothing out of place.”

Kurapika sighed, somehow glad to hear that. He let his eyes close, he wasn’t dizzy or nauseous, but he felt heavy and immensely relieved that they had all walked free of the wreckage. His head swam a bit, and he felt like he was falling asleep.

Chrollo stirred him, “Don’t sleep.”

Kurapika looked up at him, “I was just calming down.”

Chrollo firmed his voice, “Don’t sleep. We need to check your concussion first.”

Kurapika blinked, “What concussion?”

Chrollo gave him a look, “Uh-huh, we definitely need to check you out.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, _I don’t have a concussion… Do I?_

He looked around, Chrollo was still on his feet despite the obvious hit he’d taken to his face and, by proximity, his head. Shalnark was sitting now, wincing as he tended to his leg. Feitan was taking deep, slow breaths, staring up at apparently nothing.

Kurapika looked back to Chrollo, “Is the other driver dead?”

Chrollo held his hand to his cheek, clearly beginning to feel the pain, “I think so. But I have a nagging suspicion that it’s no accident.”

Kurapika gazed at him, “You think they hit us on purpose?”

Chrollo gave him a grim look, “I do. I think they hit us to stun us, and I’m afraid it’s worked.”

He cast a look down at Feitan as he spoke, concern glittering in his steel grey eyes.

Feitan grumbled at him, “I’m fine. If you think we need to move then I’ll manage.”

Chrollo mulled for a moment before directing his gaze to Shalnark, “How’s your leg?”

Shalnark tenderly rubbed his leg for a moment longer, “I’ll be fine. I can walk, anyway.”

Chrollo nodded, finally looking at Kurapika, “And you?”

Kurapika burned a little under his concerned stare.

He’d been in the best position during the accident, and wasn’t about to take his time lying there if the other three were ready to go, “I’m good.”

He sat himself up, aware that Chrollo never looked away from him. His legs were shaky, he guessed from the shock, but he didn’t feel dizzy any longer. Shalnark stood next, keeping his weight off his leg for a moment. He tenderly set it down, testing his weight before he seemed satisfied. Feitan was the last to stand, seeming to have a degree of difficulty getting his right leg beneath him. Shalnark offered his hand carefully pulling him to his feet, though Feitan was still struggling, clearly unable to stand on his leg.

Chrollo kept his eyes warily on the other vehicle as he spoke, “Feitan, are you going to be okay?”

Feitan groaned a bit, “I’ll manage.”

Shalnark held on to the man, “I’ll help you.”

Kurapika brushed against Chrollo, grateful to feel his steady frame. Shalnark snaked his hand beneath Feitan’s arms, poising the man’s weight against him so he could hobble along. Chrollo braced himself against Kurapika, as though expecting him to fall over.

Shalnark and Feitan hobbled a little way off while Chrollo and Kurapika made their way to the other car. Chrollo left him a couple paces off as he cautiously leaned through the window. He stretched out a hand, apparently checking the pulse of the driver.

He drew back, “He’s dead. But he looks like a nobody.”

Kurapika slumped against the side of the wrecked car, “Meaning it was either a real accident or…?”

Chrollo rubbed his face again, wincing, “It was an accident or he was some version of a suicide bomber.”

Kurapika sighed, “What do we do?”

Chrollo stepped away from the car, “We get out of here.”

Kurapika looked at him, “We can’t just leave… What if it was a real accident?”

Chrollo gently guided him away, “Then the cops will notify his family. He’s already dead, we can’t help anything by staying here. We’ll just be gambling against the chance that it’s a trap.”

Kurapika reluctantly gave in, seeing some sense in his words, “It feels wrong to just walk away…”

Chrollo was surprisingly sympathetic, “That’s because you’re a kind person. But I trust my instincts, and they’re screaming at me to run while we can.”

Kurapika relented, “All right, let’s go.”

 

They headed off, Kurapika feeling shaky on his feet, but his head remained fairly clear. Feitan and Shalnark had gone on ahead of them, Feitan needing to be dragged due to his injured leg. They moved a bit slowly, Chrollo beginning to show signs of a concussion, and Kurapika guessed he had some fractures in his face. He’d stopped talking, swelling and pain apparently deterring him from any unnecessary speech. Blood still oozed lazily from his deeply split lip now and then, and Kurapika cringed to see how painful it looked, as though someone had ripped a lip piercing violently from him.

 

…

 

Kurapika was feeling a little wobbly as he followed Chrollo through the streets and alleyways, “Where are we going?”

Chrollo took a moment replying, apparently loosening his jaw enough to answer, “To the first hotel we can find. I’m sick of cars. And my face feels like someone took a sledgehammer to it.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows sympathetically, “Sorry, about that.”

Chrollo looked down at him, and Kurapika had to stifle a smile at how fat his cheek had grown, “What are you sorry about?”

Kurapika shrugged a bit, “I got off lucky.”

Chrollo snorted, “That’s all it was, luck. Better for you than for Feitan, that’s all. Nothing to feel sorry about.”

Kurapika knew he was right, but a little bit of guilt nagged him anyway, “I hope it’s not too bad, your face that is.”

Chrollo snickered, though he grimaced in pain as he smiled, “Sounds like you’re calling me ugly.”

Kurapika laughed quietly, “You know what I mean. It looks like it hurt.”

Chrollo shrugged, “It did, but I’m not complaining. It could’ve been a lot worse.”

Kurapika nodded, “That’s true. I suppose that’s the right attitude.”

Chrollo blotted a bit of blood away, “Mhm.”

The two trudged on in wary silence. Neither of them seemed to be able to shake the feeling that they were being watched, though neither of them could pinpoint from where or by who. Chrollo had staunched the bleeding finally, and Kurapika now felt certain of his legs beneath him. He had, however, developed a stiff pain in his hip which he guessed was a result of the buckle.

Another worry had been on his mind though, “Should Feitan go to a hospital?”

Chrollo shook his head a bit, but spoke definitively, “No.”

Kurapika looked at him, “It looked like his leg was broken though.”

Chrollo gave no visual cue, “Probably. But he’s safer staying close to the group right now. Besides, if he goes to a hospital then everyone else around him will become a potential target too.”

Kurapika gave him a mildly surprised look, “I didn’t know you care so much about collateral damage?”

Chrollo huffed, “Don’t get me wrong, it’s just inconvenient is all. People coming and going all the time and never knowing who can be trusted.”

Kurapika sighed, he was feeling tired and exhausted, “Do you know how much further it is?”

Chrollo looked around, staying quiet for a moment though Kurapika couldn’t tell what he was looking for, “I’m not sure, but cutting through the alleyways should make the trip shorter.”

Kurapika identified a note in the way he spoke, the one he used when he had an ulterior motive that he wasn’t ready to explain just yet. He dropped it, Chrollo would explain if and when he was ready, and never any sooner.

 

Kurapika was dragging his feet as he struggled to keep up with Chrollo, impressed by the man’s tenacious nature. He guessed they must’ve walked for a few miles now, and he was certain of Chrollo’s ulterior motive by this point. They’d continued walking in a single direction, though Kurapika wasn’t sure which direction it was, and the buildings around them had grown increasingly desolate.

Kurapika drew a deep, slow breath, the nausea Chrollo had mentioned was beginning to hit him, and no matter how hard he tried to keep up with the other man, he found his mind relenting to his body’s demands for rest and recuperation. Heat was burning in his gut, and his world was spinning. He sought out a flat, somewhat clear place to lower himself down and sit.

Chrollo eyed him, “What’s wrong?”

Kurapika tipped his head back slightly, focusing on his breathing, “I’m feeling sick.”

Chrollo hummed, looking at their surroundings, “That’s all right. We should be fine here.”

Kurapika took a minute between replies, too focused on not vomiting, “You think we’ll get attacked?”

Chrollo walked in a lazy circle, but his eyes were sharply scanning the buildings, “I’m sure of it. That’s why I sent Shalnark and Feitan ahead, they were injured and I wanted to draw our tail out away from them.”

Kurapika felt concern rise in him, triggering a vile taste as he retched.

He managed to hold it in, “Is that why you went towards the ruined part of the city?”

Chrollo nodded, “Yes, you should stay put if something happens.”

Kurapika grunted his disapproval, “I’m not just going to sit here, I’m fine”

Chrollo looked him over critically, “Even if that were true, what exactly do you plan on doing? You don’t have your nen right now. That’s why I kept you at my side.”

Kurapika huffed indignantly, “To protect me?”

Chrollo was still looking around, “That’s right. I needed to find a place where I can fight if I must but somewhere that also provides you cover from my Ren. Getting hit even by aura while in your state could be dangerous, so I want you to stay right there.”

Kurapika couldn’t believe how he was babying him, but Chrollo’s demeanor gave no room for argument right now, and Kurapika knew there was sense to what he said too.

_If I try to fight, I’ll end up in his way and it’ll be what happened with Paku all over again._

He conceded, sitting back and waiting, feeling the tension crackling in the air. Chrollo leaned back against a wall so that he could see the entire clearing. He held perfectly still, eyes closed as he waited for their tail to appear.

 

A long time passed with no one moving. Finally, Chrollo pushed off the wall, walking casually to the center of the clearing with his hands neatly tucked in his pockets. He walked a small circle again, before squaring off in a particular direction.

He narrowed his eyes, “I know you’re there, Silva. Why don’t we just get on with it?”

Kurapika’s heart skipped a beat as Silva appeared, cautious, but not worried. He could see the tension in Chrollo’s shoulders, whether it was because of his opponent or his insatiable grudge, he couldn’t tell.

Silva circled into the clearing, wordlessly.

Chrollo was emitting a malevolent vibe, a look in his eyes that could spill blood.

For a moment, they just locked eyes, a battle of their dominant wills. Kurapika gazed around the clearing, wondering if Silva was really alone this time. He was slammed suddenly with the force of Silva’s Ren. It was incredible, enough to rattle the windows in their sills. Kurapika quickly backed away, feeling his bones shaken beneath his flesh. He’d made it a ways back when Chrollo’s Ren added an additional frequency, making his head spin. He found a small, abandoned shopfront and ducked inside. Without his Ten, it felt like the world was shutting down around him at the sheer force of the two men. He gasped for air when he dropped inside, relieved to have a physical barrier shielding him from the maddening auras.

With his immediate concern dealt with, Kurapika wondered what would happen if Silva won. Would he kill Kurapika too? Should he run while he had the chance? He shook his head, trying to chase away the thoughts. Chrollo had survived this fight twice before, there was no reason to doubt his tenacity now.

He pressed his back to the wall, peering out to see what would transpire. Even without Gyo, Kurapika could see the disturbed waves around them as they circled each other. Chrollo was watching shiftily, but a violence in his eyes made Kurapika feel cold. The look was inhuman. Silva was watching with cold wariness. He didn’t look nervous, he looked poised to attack should Chrollo so much as flutter his eyelashes. But Kurapika could see in his measured steps that the bad blood was mutual between the two.

Chrollo conjured Bandit’s Secret, holding it close to his face and guarding his expression. Silva was squared off as though waiting for Chrollo to move first. Chrollo stayed poised, his patience unwavering. Without blinking, Silva moved. His speed was blinding, perhaps even more impressive than his physical strength.

Chrollo dodged him, dancing just out of range as they exchanged their first, testy shots at one another. Silva put on a burst of speed, landing a shot. Chrollo blocked it, but the force of it was apparent in the way it launched Chrollo backward.

Chrollo’s feet scraped along the floor, and Kurapika was impressed with how he fielded such a powerful attack with relative ease. He grunted as he dug his heels in, pivoting and dodging Silva’s follow up attack.

He rounded on the man, “What’s the matter? No Nen? Too afraid I’ll steal it?”

Silva was cool-headed, not falling for Chrollo’s taunts, “I won’t need my Nen.”

Chrollo huffed a bit, “Confident as ever.”

Silva narrowed his eyes, “And you’re cocky as ever.”

Their exchange was tense, Kurapika could see the fury burning between them though neither of them seemed willing to make the first big move.

Finally, Silva made a move. Kurapika could hardly follow the attack with his eyes, but Chrollo dodged it with an element of grace. Silva pivoted expertly, his hand glowing with his Nen. His other hand caught Chrollo by his coat, yanking him off his feet and into his attack. Chrollo’s eyes widened for a heartbeat, but he slipped free of his coat in the last moment, ducking the worst of the attack. He gathered his weight above his legs, ready to spring clear of Silva.

But as he did, Silva put on a burst of speed, catching him in his backward momentum. Chrollo gasped, trying to pivot and block, but Silva caught his wrists when he did. The amount of aura collected in his palm was staggering, and it was immediately clear that he’d been holding back until this moment. Chrollo’s aura spiked in defensiveness, but as Silva’s Nen grew blindingly bright, it was painfully obvious that Chrollo hadn’t a prayer of blocking him.

Kurapika’s breath caught as Silva slammed his fist into Chrollo. The following burst from the impact shattered what remained of windows and collapsed the weaker structures with an ear-splitting ‘boom’. Kurapika ducked his head as glass and debris pelted him. He peered cautiously out, alarmed to see how badly injured Chrollo was. The black-haired man staggered back violently, his shirt was burned away and he was bloodied, though Kurapika was amazed he was even on his feet. Silva launched at him before he could regain his balance, reaching with one hand and preparing his attack with the other. Chrollo braced again, but Silva pivoted behind him. This time, Chrollo anticipated his maneuver, striking out with incredible speed and gouging a large wound with his Benz knife. Silva bared his teeth, apparently caught off guard. He cleared range of the knife, giving Chrollo a moment to recompose himself.

Silva grunted, applying a tourniquet to his wounded arm without flinching. Chrollo drew deep breaths, trembling from his wounds, but his eyes remained sharp and clear. Silva circled him again, Chrollo holding doggedly to his Bandit’s Secret, watching him carefully.

Kurapika couldn’t figure out why Chrollo wasn’t attacking. Silva was charging another attack, his eyes watching the knife. Without warning, Silva launched again. Chrollo tried to dodge, but his ankle was caught by a massive hand. He dropped the knife, but held fast to his book as Silva slammed him into the ground. Silva raised his fist again, his free hand crushing Chrollo’s throat as he delivered a direct hit.

Kurapika ducked again as the powerful burst of energy tore more debris loose from the surrounding alleyway and buildings. He leapt out from his hiding place, almost unwilling to look and see what had happened. Chrollo was lying limply beneath Silva, massive burns and wounds covering his torso. His eyes were half open but completely vacant, and Kurapika felt frozen with dread and horror with every moment that passed and he remained completely unresponsive.

Silva kept his crushing grip over Chrollo’s neck until he seemed convinced he was really dead. Kurapika was frozen in both space and time. He didn’t know what to do, it was like the world stopped entirely. Silva stood up backing off a bit and letting Chrollo’s limp body fall over the rubble left from the impact.

He gave a hard look at Kurapika, interrupted when his phone rang. Kurapika didn’t hear a word he said, too shocked to process anything, but Silva turned and walked casually away.

Kurapika didn’t realize he’d moved until he came to stand next to Chrollo, He crouched down, reaching out to touch him and confirm that he was dead, but his hand shook violently and he froze. Gathering his courage, he forced his hand to move, but just as he brushed his fingers to Chrollo’s body, it dissipated. He reeled in shock, stumbling back with a horrified gasp. A sound behind him made Kurapika turn on his heels. Spinning around, he saw Chrollo emerge from beneath some rubble with a hefty cough.

Kurapika felt his breath catch, as the man stumbled clear of the debris. Chrollo’s shirt was badly tattered, and his right pant leg was torn from mid-thigh down. Burns from Silva’s attacks seared his skin over his chest and arms, but they didn’t look too bad. Kurapika stepped back as Chrollo neared him, flushed and looking as though he’d seen a ghost.

Chrollo extended a hand, “It’s all right. It was a trick.”

Kurapika gazed wide-eyed at him, finally releasing the breath he was holding, “A trick?”

Chrollo nodded, coming closer and revealing his Bandit’s Secret book, “I used two abilities in tandem. A teleportation Nen in the moment Silva attacked me, and a Transmutation Nen to create a clone long enough that Silva got the call and left while thinking I was dead.”

Kurapika was still staring at him, “What call?”

Chrollo closed the book, “The call that his employer is dead, and therefore he need not finish the task.”

Kurapika shook his head, “You couldn’t tell me what you were planning?”

Chrollo gave him an apologetic look as he removed what little was left of his shirt, “To deceive your enemies, you must first deceive your allies. Sorry about that.”

Kurapika glanced at the spot where his ‘body’ had been lying just a moment before, feeling shaken to his core, “Let’s just… go.”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes with concern as Kurapika turned hastily to leave, “Are you all right?”

Kurapika kept walking as he spoke, “I thought you were dead.”

Chrollo followed him, “But I’m not.”

Kurapika shook his head, heaving a deep breath, “That doesn’t really help.”

Chrollo managed to catch up to him, “Doesn’t it? I mean, you could be headed for the nearest hotel alone right now.”

Kurapika gave him a look, his head beginning to pound, “Just shut up. How far do we have to walk?”

Chrollo hummed, “A couple miles at most.”

Kurapika groaned, tentatively running his fingers through his hair, “Wonderful.”

Chrollo huffed in amusement, but he said no more as the two of them headed shoulder-to-shoulder down the alleyway back towards the main city, moving pointedly in the opposite direction of Silva.


	14. Deviance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NSFW content warning for sounding  
> Squicky scene will be marked as {REDACTED SCENE}  
> Please skip to the end of the redacted scene if you're uncomfortable with sounding!

            Kurapika dropped onto the hotel bed, exhausted. His head ached violently, and his hip felt terribly stiff. Chrollo had bought him some acetaminophen when they arrived, swiping the bottle of aspirin he’d picked up and putting it back.

Kurapika had glared at him, “What’s that for?”

Chrollo gave him a mild look, “You can’t take aspirin or ibuprofen with a concussion, especially since you were vomiting. I’ll get you some Tylenol instead.”

Kurapika muttered something, but he let Chrollo guide him through lobby store, the lights seeming so painfully bright. Eyes cast on them, the clerk giving Chrollo an alarmed once-over.

The cashier gazed wide-eyed, “S-sir? Are you okay? Do you need to go to the hospital or something? I can call someone…”

Chrollo had answered him mildly and calmly, “Thank you, that’s considerate of you. But I’m fine, honestly. There was this accident see? A couple of cars collided, hit us where we were parked at the light. One of the gas tanks got punctured, and before I even knew what I was doing I was trying to help this poor lady get out before the whole thing went up in flames. Guess I got a little burned in the process.”

The clerk was gazing in admiration and awe, “My God! What happened, was she okay?”

Chrollo nodded, giving a soft, grateful look, “I think so, yes! They took her to the hospital, I uh,” he ducked his head in fake shyness, “Don’t have good insurance, so I didn’t want to go to the hospital, I really couldn’t afford something like that. I’ve been in a tough place lately.”

The clerk gasped, “You walked all the way here? In your shape?”

Chrollo nodded bashfully, giving a soft laugh, “Uh-huh, I guess I must look pretty sorry right now.”

The clerk was completely had, “Oh, you poor thing! Here,” he bagged everything Chrollo had set on the counter, “Please, as a thank you for being so selfless and brave. I don’t mean to intrude, but you said you’re on hard times right now, so this is the least I can do.”

Chrollo looked at him in mock surprise and gratitude, “That’s very kind of you! Thank you so much, I hope you have a wonderful evening sir!”

The clerk gave him an enthusiastic wave, “You too, I hope you get some rest.”

When they’d left, Kurapika turned to him and shook his head, “Unbelievable.”

Chrollo gave him an innocent look, “What?”

Kurapika rolled his eyes, “That would’ve cost, what, a thousand jennies tops?”

Chrollo mulled, “Probably, yeah. Why?”

Kurapika rubbed his temple, “And you absolutely **had** to scam that poor cashier? You cheap ass.”

Chrollo shrugged, “It was a harmless exchange, he just wanted to be helpful and kind.”

Kurapika wanted to groan in exasperation, “And you took advantage of that. With a really terrible story, at that.”

Chrollo smiled lightly, “He bought it, didn’t he? So it wasn’t that bad.”

Kurapika sighed, “Just, shut up. Let’s get a room. I’m hurting all over.”

Chrollo nodded agreeably, “All right, let’s get a nice room yeah? One with a nice bath and a big, king size mattress.”

Kurapika didn’t miss that, “ ** _A_** mattress huh?”

Chrollo smiled as he approached the front desk, “Of course. You’ve had a nasty shock, don’t you want to cuddle tonight?”

Kurapika scoffed in mock disgust, “As if. I’m not weak, I don’t need you holding me like a baby to comfort me.”

Chrollo puffed out his lip in a pout, “You’re so mean sometimes, and after I rushed into a blazing wreckage and saved a poor woman before walking miles because I’m too broke to afford a trip to the hospital. I just want to take care of you.”

Kurapika rolled his eyes, “Oh, go to hell.”

The receptionist was giving Kurapika a baffled look, making him realize how horrible that sounded out of context, “Uh, so, a room?”

Chrollo smiled amicably, “Oh, yes please. Don’t mind his attitude, he’s still a little roughed up from an accident we had earlier.”

The receptionist glanced between them, “Oh, uh, sorry to hear that. We have a nice room on the fifth floor if you think that sounds like something you’d be interested in? It’s more expensive, but it’s got a nice view, a large bath, and a king bed.”

Chrollo smiled again, “That sounds perfect. How much for two nights? We’re sort of beat up and could use a break.”

The receptionist checked his monitor, “Uh… It’ll be 56,000 jennies for two nights. It’s actually a discounted price if you book more than one night.”

Kurapika glanced back towards the store, wondering what the kind clerk would think seeing them book a room on the top floor after Chrollo’s story about being broke.

Chrollo closed off the transaction politely, dipping his head slightly as he and Kurapika headed for the elevator. Once the door closed, Kurapika slumped carefully against Chrollo, not wanting to brush too roughly over his burns.

Chrollo wrapped an arm over him, “I thought you didn’t want to cuddle up to me?”

Kurapika grunted, “I don’t want to be treated like a baby, the cuddling isn’t a problem.”

Chrollo squeezed a little tighter, “You know I’m only teasing. I know you’re strong, doesn’t mean I don’t like the rare chance to take care of you.”

Kurapika hummed quietly, letting himself enjoy the attention, “I know. Doesn’t mean I’m just gonna roll over for you.”

Chrollo chuffed softly, planting a kiss against the top of his head, “I love that about you. But it’s been a long day, let’s get to our room, clean up, and sleep.”

Kurapika just gave a vacant nod, he was tired and the thought of a bath and sleep sounded delightful.

 

 

Now, Kurapika was lying on the mattress waiting for the Tylenol to kick in. Chrollo was drawing a bath to soak in since they’d both quickly rinsed in the shower, talking to Shalnark on the phone.

He stuck his hand in the water, testing the temperature, “I see. Well, I hope he starts to feel better. If he doesn’t start healing soon, get him a doctor, okay?”

He hung up with a quiet sigh. Kurapika sat up, “How’s the water?”

Chrollo looked over towards him, “Perfect for me. Why don’t you come check?”

Kurapika snorted, he’d known Chrollo would suggest they bathe together from the first time the idea of a bath left his lips. He hauled himself up, sauntering to the bathroom and sitting on the rim of the bath next to Chrollo. He dipped his hand in, immediately sighing at how nice it felt.

Kurapika glanced at Chrollo, “Is it all right with your burns?”

Chrollo looked down at his bare chest, “I think so. It’s worth it, at least, if I get to bathe with you.”

He shot him a smile, but Kurapika gave him a flat look, “I’m not sure what you think we’ll be doing but I don’t have the energy for anything more than a nice soak right now.”

Chrollo smiled lightly, trailing his hand through the water, “That’s fine by me. I still think it’s romantic.”

Kurapika pretended to gag, earning a frown from Chrollo, “So you’re a romantic now?”

Chrollo tipped his head, “Is it really that surprising?”

Kurapika smiled softly, “Kind of.”

Chrollo flicked water droplets at him, “I think you’re just grouchy because you’re tired and sore.”

Kurapika wiped the droplets off his face, “What am I supposed to do about that?”

Chrollo began to unbutton his pants, though he didn’t do it in a suggestive manner, “Soak in this nice water before it gets cold and then go to sleep.”

Kurapika smiled a bit, following his lead. He took his shirt off, trying not to stare at Chrollo as he undressed the rest of the way. He couldn’t help taking in his injuries though, noting the sunburn-like redness over his chest.

He touched him gently, earning a startled jolt from his cold hands, “Are you sure it’ll be all right?”

Chrollo teasingly took hold of his hand and rubbed it over his chest, “It’s fine. I took some of that Tylenol earlier, it doesn’t even hurt now.”

Kurapika tipped his head, enjoying the skin-to-skin contact. He withdrew gently, he liked the affection and attention, but he was genuinely only interested in the bath at the moment. Chrollo gave no protest, sinking into the water first. He moved slowly, carefully gauging the warm water against the burned skin. When he seemed satisfied, he sighed and closed his eyes.

Chrollo half opened his eyes and looked over at Kurapika, “You gonna join me?”

Kurapika blushed a bit, turning away with a soft smile as he finished undressing. He dipped his feet in, adjusting to the water before dropping the rest of himself in. He sighed, feeling the warm water relax his tense muscles. The bath was just large enough for the two of them to sit opposite each other. Kurapika scrunched his knees up, sinking himself a little lower into the water with a happy smile. Chrollo watched him through the same lowered eyes, teasing Kurapika by rubbing his foot against his thigh.

Kurapika narrowed his eyes at him, “Uh uh, not right now.”

Chrollo smiled tauntingly, “Do I not have your permission to touch you?”

Kurapika couldn’t deny the way his lips quirked, “You can do whatever you like, I’m just letting you know that I have no intention of reciprocating it right now.”

Chrollo hummed, tipping his head, “That’s fine. Just let me care for you.”

Kurapika gave him a more interested look now, “Oh? What are you scheming behind those dark eyes of yours?”

Chrollo smiled wading over to his side. Kurapika shifted a bit awkwardly to allow him enough room to slip behind him. He half expected Chrollo to tease him, but he just pulled him to lean back into him. He worked his hands in firm, comforting motions. Chrollo massaged the tension from his muscles, pressing his face into Kurapika’s blonde hair and closing his eyes happily.

Kurapika couldn’t help his smile, he leaned into Chrollo’s embrace, feeling utterly content despite the day’s events. He tipped his head, allowing Chrollo to nuzzle into his neck. Chrollo sighed, but didn’t try advancing on him. Instead, he wrapped his arms around his waist, sinking lower into the water and sighing comfortably. Both of them closed their eyes, listening to the sounds from outside the open window, and drifting off.

 

Eventually, when they’d soaked up enough heat and allowed their muscles to relax, they climbed out of the bath. Kurapika toweled off, he was feeling his exhaustion as he brushed his teeth. Chrollo sauntered up behind him, drying Kurapika’s hair with a towel and marveling at his soft locks and the way they were ruffled by his hands. Kurapika leaned back into him, Chrollo’s bare chest against his bare back. The skin contact made them both smile while Chrollo finished drying his hair.

They finished getting dressed in the new clothes they bought, Kurapika relished the soft silk. Making their way to the bed, they flopped down together, Chrollo being careful to lay on the side of his face that didn’t hit the window in their earlier crash. Kurapika knew he’d be using Zetsu after getting injured and using a large amount of aura to copy himself in order to fool Silva. Chrollo wrapped his arm around him, pulling him close while Kurapika happily snuggled into him.

 

…

 

Kurapika woke the next morning when he felt Chrollo getting up. He stretched with a yawn, turning lazily to Kurapika, “If you want breakfast, we better get it now.”

Kurapika blinked away his sleepiness and looked up at Chrollo, happy to see that his injuries were already healing, “All right, what time is it?”

Chrollo rubbed his eyes with a yawn, “8:30.”

Kurapika sat up next to him, “Any idea what they serve for breakfast?”

Chrollo got to his feet, “If we stay here any longer, then we’ll be lucky to get crumbs.”

Kurapika followed him, not bothering to change out of the silk pajamas he was wearing. He buttoned up the top and wrapped the tie around his waist, leaving a deep V-neck in the collar.

Chrollo eyed him demonstrably, making him roll his eyes as he responded, “Could you be any more obvious?”

Chrollo placed his hands on Kurapika’s hips, pulling him close, “I think I could if I tried.”

Kurapika brushed him away, “I’m starving, let’s go get something to eat.”

Chrollo obliged him, holding the door for him as they headed for the lobby. Once there, the browsed through the surprisingly good food selection. Kurapika picked out a ham and cheese croissant and a cup of coffee, while Chrollo’s eyes lit up at the sight of muffins and pancakes.

Kurapika shook his head with amusement, “That’s **really** healthy.”

Chrollo smiled, drowning his pancakes in syrup with contentment, “Hush, I like sweet things.”

He gave Kurapika a wink as he finished. Kurapika just bit into his breakfast croissant. It was surprisingly tasteful, and Chrollo smiled with how his eyes lit up.

Picking at his muffin, he tipped his head, “Is it good?”

Kurapika swallowed, “It’s pretty good, yeah.”

Chrollo’s eyes twinkled with mischief as he offered half his muffin to him, “Trade you for a taste?”

Kurapika rolled his eyes hard, “What, are we a married couple now?”

Chrollo smiled, “Oh, come on. Just a taste?”

Kurapika sighed, breaking off part of his croissant and swapping with Chrollo. He looked terribly happy as he ate the croissant, closing his eyes and chewing slowly as though relishing every taste and texture. Kurapika snorted, shoving the entire muffin half in his mouth in one bite.

This proved to be a mistake when he choked, making Chrollo laugh heartily, “Slow down there, hellcat.”

Kurapika wiped his tears, “Shut up or I’ll shove my fist down your throat.”

Chrollo sipped his coffee while making a face, “Don’t make promises you aren’t prepared to keep.”

Kurapika coughed again, “Really? If you don’t cut it out I’ll be more than prepared to keep my promise.”

Chrollo made a face, “Oh yeah? Maybe I just won’t stop talking until you make me.”

Kurapika rolled his eyes, “You’re a pain in the ass.”

When Chrollo looked ready to make yet another joke, Kurapika silenced him with a hand. Chrollo relented, still looking pleased with himself.

 

They finished their breakfast, heading back to the room when Chrollo paused at the door.

He mulled for a moment, “We should probably check on Feitan. Shalnark said he was really feeling like hell last night.”

Kurapika shrugged, his shock-driven concern had waned, “If you think so.”

Chrollo cocked a brow, but went on to click the second-floor button. He wandered until he found room 234, knocking when they finally arrived.

Shalnark’s voice came from inside, “Who is it?”

Chrollo cleared his throat, putting on a ridiculous accent, “Room service.”

There was a moment of quiet before the door flew open to reveal Shalnark’s unamused face.

Kurapika snickered as Chrollo pursed his lips, “Rough night?”

Shalnark looked over his shoulder, “He hasn’t stopped nagging me since we got here.”

Though he looked annoyed, Kurapika could see the concern lighting his eyes. He followed Chrollo and Shalnark into the room, Feitan was lying on a bed with his right leg raised on a stack of pillows. He glared at his guests when they walked in, though he offered no greeting.

Chrollo came to stand next to the bed, “How are you, Fei?”

Feitan grumbled, screwing up his face, “Hurts like hell. You couldn’t heal me?”

Chrollo furrowed his brows in sympathy, “Sorry, I exhausted my nen when I cloned myself fighting Silva. But that’s why I’m checking in, do you think you need to be healed?”

Feitan glared at him, “Take one look at my leg and you tell me.”

Chrollo glanced at Feitan, “That bad?”

Feitan just grunted. Chrollo carefully pulled the blanket away, cringing as he saw how blackened Feitan’s leg was. He conjured his book, thumbing through the pages and settling on one of his two healing Nen. Kurapika recognized it as the one that burned like hell. Chrollo carefully placed his hands over Feitan’s leg, making the small man groan in pain as his Nen began working.

Shalnark’s hand on his shoulder startled him. He turned to see him offering a glass of water, “Here.”

Kurapika blinked in surprise, “Oh, thanks.”

Shalnark gave him a tired nod, sitting down on his own bed for a moment before he flopped onto his side. Feitan gripped the sheets in pain, but he didn’t let himself make a sound. Kurapika settled into a chair with a yawn, still a bit worn out from their latest adventure.

Chrollo worked wordlessly for about 40 minutes. He shook his head when he was finished, looking exhausted again, “Sorry, Fei. I hope that’s enough to do you some good.”

Feitan sighed, “Yeah, thank you. It’s helping.”

Chrollo patted his chest gently, “Hang in there.”

Feitan grunted, “I’m not dying, stop being such a bi-”

Chrollo interrupted him, “All right, I get it. Good to see you’re back to your old self.”

Feitan huffed, “A broken leg isn’t going to shut me up, you know that.”

Chrollo smiled at him, “Of course I know that.”

He helped Feitan sit up to drink, the smaller man groaning sorely as he did. But he sighed easily, relaxing as Chrollo handed him a glass of water. Feitan looked parched as he gulped the water down before easing himself back down.

More sincerely, he added to Chrollo, “Thanks. It feels a lot better.”

Chrollo ruffled his hair, “Any time. Keep me up to date and let me know if the pain doesn’t start to ease up.”

 

…

 

Chrollo and Kurapika were sitting on the foot of the bed, Chrollo flipping through the channels on the TV with a disinterested look.

He sighed, “This sucks. 60 channels and not a damn thing on.”

Kurapika laughed quietly, “What do you expect? They’re cheap.”

Chrollo huffed, “You got that right,” he sighed noisily, “Well, I’m bored. What do you want to do?”

Kurapika thought for a moment, a thought crossing his mind and making him purse his lips a bit, “There’s a pool…”

Chrollo smiled, wickedly pleased, “Didn’t know you were a swimmer?”

Kurapika copped a brow, “It’s just a suggestion.”

Chrollo was already getting to his feet, “You know, if there’s a pool, there’s probably a jacuzzi.”

He gave Kurapika suggestive look, making Kurapika roll his eyes, “We’ll have to buy swimsuits.”

Chrollo smiled, “Do I get to pick yours out for you?”

Kurapika fluttered his eyelashes, sarcastically, “Absolutely… **_not._** ”

Chrollo puffed his lip out but didn’t argue. They headed down to the lobby shop, shifting through swimsuits. Kurapika settled for a red one with a floral pattern over the right thigh. He was very aware of the way Chrollo eyed him as he did. Chrollo had grabbed a black pair with a deep crimson waistband, and Kurapika found himself suddenly staring. He shook his head humorously as he realized how obvious he was acting.

They changed and headed for the pool area, Kurapika walking behind Chrollo and unable to avoid staring hard at his pleasant back view. He’d covered his tattoo by draping his towel across his shoulders and letting it hang and obscure it, but his lower back was still visible, and the tight elastic waistband emphasized his muscled hips. Kurapika swallowed hard, drawing a deep, slow breath, and wondering when he let his lust run away with him. Chrollo had this kind of forward walk, it made his muscles stretch and flex and Kurapika was helpless but to admire the details.

Chrollo swiped the keycard and opened the door to the indoor jacuzzi, holding it for Kurapika. Always the opportunist, Chrollo gave him a playful slap as he passed. Kurapika yelped in surprise, rounding on him with a glare.

Chrollo gave him a cheeky look, “What? You get to stare and admire but I can’t tease you a little?”

Kurapika burned, “What?”

Chrollo smiled, “You have a nice ass, by the way.”

Kurapika nearly choked, “Please, shut up!”

Chrollo chuckled, letting Kurapika walk in front of him while he appreciated his flaming blush. Kurapika’s legs trembled a bit, and he had no idea why he was so worked up suddenly. Kurapika shook his head, utterly befuddled but not unhappy by his reaction to Chrollo’s teasing. He dipped his toes in the water while Chrollo fumbled with the settings.

He lowered himself another step, enjoying the spray on his legs as Chrollo spoke to him, “You know why you’re jumpy right now?”

Kurapika shot him a suspicious look, “Why?”

Chrollo shifted his weight onto one leg, placing another emphasis on his hips, “Caffeine overdose. You drank my coffee, and I like it very rich and very strong.”

Kurapika huffed indignantly, wading into the water, “I’ve had my coffee black before.”

Chrollo stuck his tongue out a tiny bit, “Is that right? How about Robusta with three shots of espresso?”

Kurapika gaped at him, “What the hell do you need something that strong for?”

Chrollo gave him a nonchalant look, “I don’t sleep often.”

Kurapika scoffed, “What the hell… No wonder I’m jittery. You couldn’t warn me it was that strong?”

Chrollo shrugged, “You didn’t ask. You just grabbed it drank it.”

Kurapika shook his head, “Unbelievable. You coming or are you just going to gawk at me?”

Chrollo hummed thoughtfully, leaning on the rails and eyeing him heavily, “As much as I love gawking at your… delicious frame,” Kurapika glared at him, but he continued, “I set the jets and temperature.”

Kurapika waded across from the steps and Chrollo lowered himself in with a sigh. He positioned himself against a jet, trying to relax physically despite his jitters.

Chrollo watched him through lowered eyes, a soft smile on his lips, “You look good.”

Kurapika scowled, “What’s with your flirting today?”

Chrollo blinked slowly, “I’m just enjoying your company. Besides, you’ve been gazing at me like a hawk all morning.”

Kurapika shook his head slightly, “It’s not like that!”

Chrollo tipped his head amusedly, “Oh, it’s not? Are you sure about that?”

He pushed off the wall and waded towards Kurapika, pressing against him and reclining on his arm so that he faced him.

Kurapika burned hotly, but turned to face him anyway, admiring the mirth in his eyes, “What are you thinking about?”

He searched Kurapika’s gaze for a moment before replying, “You.”

Kurapika’s breath caught, but before he could say anything, Chrollo kissed him. Kurapika brought his hands up in surprise, but he melted beneath the sweet touch in an instant. They deepened the kiss, Kurapika relished the feeling of his tongue and let himself relax completely.

Chrollo’s hand trailed up his thigh, jolting him, “What are you doing?”

Chrollo smiled softly, lingering only an inch away from Kurapika’s face as he answered, “Giving you my affection. Is that wrong?”

Kurapika loved the way he spoke, that silky, deep voice so close to his face, “We’re in public!”

Chrollo smiled a little, “So?”

Kurapika gazed incredulously at him as he worked his hand just beneath the hem of his swimsuit, “What if someone sees us?”

Chrollo leaned closer, walking his fingers higher and speaking in a sultry voice, “Let them watch.”

Kurapika felt his breath hitch, _shit… that’s hot._

Noticing he was speechless, Chrollo smiled before burying his face into Kurapika’s neck. He brushed his lips over the skin, making Kurapika grip his hair while arching his back, his eyes darting desperately around to see if anyone could see them.

Chrollo sucked at the skin while one hand worked beneath Kurapika’s limited clothing, “You know, you look really good in that bathing suit.”

Kurapika grabbed a little harder, small gasps escaping him, “What’s- gotten into you?”

Chrollo hummed, nipping him gently and massaging his erection, “Are you not in the mood?”

Kurapika moaned at a particularly good touch, oh he was definitely in the mood. He drove his hips into Chrollo’s palm, “I’m just nervous.”

Chrollo tilted his head a bit, “Worried someone’s gonna see us?”

Kurapika looked at him, “Yeah. What if someone sees your tattoo?”

Chrollo met his eyes, their tension building, “You really think someone could sneak up on us?”

Kurapika tipped his head back a bit, a very clear invitation, “We’re pretty distracted right now, I think it’s possible.”

Chrollo sucked at his skin a bit more, breaking just long enough to speak, “Mm… maybe you’re right. But again, who cares? Let them watch. We must look good together.”

Kurapika moaned softly, painfully turned on, “God… why do you have to say it like that.”

Chrollo laughed softly, a hand coming up to tease Kurapika’s chest, “Does it turn you on? The anticipation of being caught at any moment?”

Kurapika pulled his hair harder, “Yes. But we can’t do this here.”

Chrollo gave him a look, “You’re sure? This water is so good. And those jets work wonders.”

Kurapika sighed softly at another touch, admittedly disappointed at the prospect of getting out, “I’m sure. If we had our own jacuzzi it would be a different story.”

Chrollo smiled at him, his eyes glowing, “Kinky boy.”

Kurapika trembled, nearly abandoning his will at the way Chrollo spoke, “Hush. Let’s go back to the room.”

Chrollo gave him a firm squeeze, smiling against his lips, “So eager. I love that.”

Kurapika whined a bit, grinding himself against Chrollo’s hand again, “Are we going?”

Chrollo drew back, standing up while still facing Kurapika, making him swallow hard as he admired the way the rivulets streamed over his abs.

Chrollo didn’t miss it, smiling fondly at him, “Let’s go, naughty boy, and I’ll treat you to something special.”

Kurapika parted his lips in a silent moan, taking Chrollo’s extended hand. Shyness burned him as he stood up and became aware of how aroused he was.

Chrollo looked him up and down once, a playful light in his eyes, “That’s a good boy.”

Kurapika twitched, turning away quickly, “Will you please shut up!”

Chrollo chuffed sweetly, “Until we get to the room? Then may I continue?”

Kurapika hauled himself out of the jacuzzi, wrapping a towel tightly around his waist in an attempt to calm down, “Once we’re back to the room? Then I insist you continue.”

Chrollo’s beautiful grey eyes narrowed excitedly, and he whispered under his breath, more to himself than Kurapika, “What a good, good boy.”

 

They headed back to the room, Kurapika desperately covering his crotch while Chrollo had draped the towel over his back to hide his tattoo again. Before the door even clicked shut, Chrollo captured him powerfully in his arms. He pinned Kurapika to a wall, cupping his face and smothering him aggressively. Kurapika gasped at the force of it, Chrollo shoving his tongue down his throat until his head was spinning from lack of oxygen.

Their towels dropped from their bodies as Chrollo ground his hips powerfully into Kurapika’s. Kurapika threw his head back in a silent wail, allowing Chrollo to fasten his lips to his neck again. Audible moans began escaping him as Chrollo’s forcefulness increased.

He spoke into his ear, lifting one leg, “Tell me what you want, you kinky boy.”

Kurapika gasped, his hands scratching at Chrollo’s back, “I want you.”

Chrollo moaned into his ear, lifting his other leg so that he was holding him. Kurapika locked his ankles behind Chrollo’s back as he was ravished once more by Chrollo’s sweet, plush lips. The air around them felt so hot and stifling as they drowned in each other.

Chrollo finally dropped him, “Can you wait for just a while longer?”

Kurapika whined, “You’re really going to make me wait?”

Chrollo kissed him again, walking him back towards the bed before sitting him down, “Just for a short while. There’s something I’ve been dying to try with you.”

Kurapika groaned in protest, “Do you have to?”

Chrollo stroked his face, “I’ll reward you. I’ll make it worth your patience, I promise.”

Kurapika swallowed before sighing, “You better make it worth it.”

Chrollo held his chin, looking into his eyes, “I promise you.”

 

…

 

Kurapika bit into a granola bar in frustration. Chrollo had left him completely, and he had no idea where he’d gone. It had been over an hour now, and Kurapika had found his way to the lobby twice now to buy a snack to ease his annoyance and aching groin.

He heard the sound of a keycard, turning an annoyed glare on the door to greet Chrollo as he returned. He gave him a sympathetic look as he stepped into the room, “I’m sorry, it took longer than I thought.”

Kurapika pouted at him, “No kidding? You just left me here.”

Chrollo stuck his tongue out, “Hey, I left myself too.”

Kurapika made a face at him, but noticed for the first time the large bag he’d brought with him. It was discreet, too discreet he thought. Opaque black and large with solid handles as though the contents were heavy.

He narrowed his eyes, “What’s that?”

Chrollo shifted his weight, looking at the bag a bit shyly, “It’s… uh.”

Kurapika gave him a suspicious look, coming to stand next to him an noticing the way he looked awkwardly around, “What?”

Chrollo tipped his head, “Why don’t you look for yourself?”

Kurapika squinted at him, “You’re acting really suspicious.”

Chrollo scratched his head, “It’s just… suddenly a lot more awkward now that I actually got it.”

Kurapika cautiously grabbed the bag, “Do I even want to know what you got?”

Chrollo coughed, “Uh, that depends on whether or not you’re still in the mood.”

Kurapika looked at him incredulously, “Oh hell no.”

Chrollo blushed, “Just, look in the bag and then get back to me.”

Kurapika couldn’t help a smile as Chrollo walked over to the bed and buried his face in embarrassment, making him both terrified and excited to see what was in the bag.

He recognized the first item instantly, “Oh joy, let’s see what the mad man has in the bag. First, we have… lubricant. How gentlemanly of you.”

Chrollo let out a muffled scream into the pillow before speaking to him, “Don’t ridicule me, it sounded like a good idea at the time.”

Kurapika huffed pulling out leather restraints and two cock rings before picking up a long, curved, narrow, steel rod, “Cuffs, rings, and… what the hell is this?”

Chrollo half laughed half groaned while covering his face, “You make me sound like a sexual deviant.”

Kurapika scoffed dubiously at him, “You **_are_** a sexual deviant- seriously what the hell is this thing?”

Chrollo slapped his hands to his face, “Don’t talk down on me, you’re just as kinky.”

Kurapika bit his tongue, he was right, but Kurapika didn’t want to tell him that as he pulled out the rest of the bag contents; vibrators, clamps, a collar, a blindfold, and a gag.

Kurapika looked at him, earning a very shy laugh, “That’s one hell of a look…”

Kurapika shook his head, “You plan on going all out huh?”

Chrollo shrugged, “As far as you want to go.”

Kurapika held up the rod again, “All right, one more time, what **_is_** this?”

Chrollo bit his lip, “Well, little hellcat… Come over here with me and you’ll find out what’s special about little Van Buren there.”

Kurapika stared at him for a moment, not sure he wanted to know what the hell he meant by ‘Van Buren’. He decided against it, coming over to the bed and locking a kiss with Chrollo who reached around his lower back. Their kiss grew deep and heated once more, Chrollo pulled him down to straddle him while working his hands beneath his shirt.

Chrollo gave his ass a hard smack, rolling him so that he was lying on his back on the bed as he spoke, “Lie down here. Do you remember your word?”

Kurapika swallowed, his excitement back in an instant, “Of course. Tonight, I’m at your _mercy._ ”

Chrollo fished through his newly bought items, taking hold of the collar and setting it on the bed. Kurapika smiled at him as he returned to straddle him, running his hands over his abdomen and chest with a pleasant look. Kurapika shivered a bit under his touch as he pulled his shirt away. Chrollo leaned down, kissing his neck and chest before teasing his nipples with rough, full strokes of his tongue.

Kurapika gasped as he continued working his tongue for a moment longer before working his now dried swimsuit trunks off. He kissed down his body, trailing his tongue hotly against him and working his way lower. He kissed his erection, flicking his tongue a couple of times but being careful not to overexcite him just yet. He drew back, marveling at Kurapika’s body as he picked up the collar. Kurapika eyed him hungrily as he sat him up just enough to wrap the collar around his neck.

Kurapika eyed him, “I always thought you were the type to prefer using their hands.”

Chrollo fastened the collar snugly, but not too tightly, “I do. This is mostly for the visual,” he ran his hands over the skin on his throat with a ferocious look, “Seeing you beneath me, looking up at me with those big, round eyes as if your begging me like a pet.”

Kurapika narrowed his eyes, Chrollo was **definitely** having one of his sadistic and dominant streaks, “Like a _pet?_ ”

Chrollo pulled on the collar, smiling wickedly, “Well, with that nice leather band around your sweet, little throat, what would you call yourself right now?”

Kurapika bridged his hips, licking his lips, “Mm… I don’t know… maybe **slave?** ”

Chrollo moaned softly, “I like that. But I prefer pet if it means I get to call you my good boy.”

Kurapika squirmed a bit, terribly aroused, “You want me to be a good boy for you?”

Chrollo leaned a bit closer unconsciously, clearly excited by Kurapika’s words, “I do like that.”

Kurapika suddenly had an idea that made him writhe, “Is that right? You like it when I’m a good boy for you, **_boss?_** ”

He heard Chrollo’s breath hitch, and for a moment all he could do was gape wide-eyed at Kurapika and hold his breath. All Kurapika could do was smile up at him in his dumbfounded thrill.

He cooed at him, “Oh? Do you like that? Does it turn you on?”

Chrollo released a shuddering breath, pressing his lips to Kurapika’s ear as he spoke in a rough, aroused voice, “Be careful… You’re getting me dangerously excited, and you’ll want me to be gentle for what I’m planning next.”

Kurapika arched his back at the sound of his voice so rough and heavy in his ear. Chrollo kissed him roughly before getting off of him and taking hold of the cuffs. He stretched his arms above his head, fastening a cuff to each wrist and binding him to the headboard.

Kurapika was suddenly very self-conscious, “Are we really doing this in a hotel room?”

Chrollo smiled down at him, “Ah, you look delicious.”

 

{REDACTED SCENE}

Mild squick for sounding.

 

Kurapika eyed him as he picked up the lube and steel rod. He positioned himself between Kurapika’s legs, spreading them with those large, strong hands.

He looked down at him as he opened the bottle, “Try not to get too excited yet, you need to be relaxed for this.”

Kurapika squinted at him, “Okay, what is it for?”

Chrollo smirked, slathering the rod and his tip in lubricant, “Just relax. If it hurts, just tell me and if you want to stop say your word.”

Kurapika eyed him for a moment, but relaxed, “All right.”

Chrollo massaged the cold metal to his slit, making him gasp. He trembled, watching him nervously as he continued to focus on his slit.

Chrollo cooed, “Relax. Don’t tense up.”

Kurapika drew a deep breath and relaxed. He was only half hard, and Chrollo was being careful not to stimulate him too much. Chrollo pressed a little harder, making Kurapika’s breath stop at the intense sensation. A moan slipped out and his legs jerked.

Chrollo stilled him, “Easy. It’ll move naturally, just relax.”

Kurapika pulled at his restraints a bit, but he relaxed himself once more. He was agonizingly aware of the cold feeling of the steel rod in him and the way it slowly slid deeper and deeper.

As it reached a particular spot, he gasped in pain, “Ah! That hurts!”

Chrollo eased it back a bit with all the care in the world, “Okay. Easy, I’ll slow down.”

Kurapika whimpered a bit, tempted to ask him to stop. It felt weird, really weird, and it burned a bit. But there was something enticing about it too, something utterly exciting about that feeling inside of him. It reached deep, so much like when Chrollo had fucked him but somehow different from this end. Chrollo allowed it to slide again when Kurapika had relaxed. This time, it didn’t hurt. There was still that burning sensation, but it wasn’t unbearable.

Kurapika felt it settle, lifting enough to look down at where it had come to be fully sheathed in him, “What’s the point of this thing?”

Chrollo stroked him gently, making him moan loudly at the incredible sensitivity his cock now had, “The rod is curved as I’m sure you noticed. Inserting it like this will have it pressing directly against your sweet spot. The pleasure will be incredible when I add-” he picked up two more objects, a vibrator and a ring, “-these to the mix.”

Kurapika trembled desperately as he kept stroking him, “And this _isn’t_ incredible?”

Chrollo smiled, “Does it feel good already?”

He gave Kurapika a testy stroke, making him moan again, “Ah! Yes, it hurts too but yes!”

Chrollo whistled a bit, “Then you are going to lose it when I do this.”

Now fully erect, Kurapika whimpered as Chrollo took up the ring. He fastened it over the base of his cock and cinched it tight, making Kurapika yelp helplessly again, “God, that’s tight! It’s really tight!”

Chrollo took hold of the vibrator, hooking it on the inside of a Velcro strap, “Does it hurt?”

Kurapika squirmed, not entirely sure where he was on the line of pleasure and pain, “I- don’t know… Yes and no?”

Chrollo hummed, fastening the vibrator just under his head and snugging it so that it lightly touched the inserted rod, “Do you want me to stop? This is going to be an intense feeling, if you’re uncomfortable now maybe we should take it more slowly.”

Kurapika didn’t know why, but he knew that’s not what he wanted, “No, I’m fine. Just be careful please.”

Chrollo spoke sweetly, “Of course. Just let me know if it’s too much.”

Kurapika had expected him to turn the vibrator on, but instead, he picked up a second one, this one without any strap. He slicked his fingers with lubricant, gently easing one into Kurapika, making him sigh at the intrusion. There was a new sensation this time as Chrollo curled his fingers, Kurapika could feel the steel rod with every movement.

He gasped and moaned with every curl, a thought suddenly occurring to him, “Someone’s gonna hear us.”

Chrollo hummed, adding a finger and working a little harder and making him moan even louder, “You mean they’re going to hear _you.”_

Kurapika couldn’t keep himself quiet as Chrollo worked him faster and harder. He withdrew his fingers after a while, taking the lube and slicking up the vibrator before easing it into him. Kurapika whined at the feeling as he pushed it all the way in, leaving a small cord to hold on to.

He peered down at Kurapika, picking up a small remote, “You ready?”

Kurapika quivered a bit, “Will it hurt?”

Chrollo hummed, “No. That insertion would be the worst pain you’d feel, if you handled that, you should be fine. But it will be intense, let me know if you get overstimulated. Oh, and you won’t be able to release, so,” he added mischievously, “make sure to beg me to take it out if you get to that point.”

Kurapika pursed his lips, “You want me to beg, _boss?”_

Chrollo moaned, “You don’t know what that does to me, hearing you call me that.”

Kurapika eyed him as he lifted the remote, turning it so he could see it and putting it at the lowest setting. His body was instantly wracked with powerful sensations. His entire lower half seized with pleasure, tensing up as he moaned loudly. He could feel the overwhelming vibrations deep within him and all over his cock thanks to the rod intruding its length. More than anything else, he was gripped by the vibrations against his sweet spot from both the insertion and the vibrator in his ass. The one strapped to his cock was touching the steel rod, sending the vibrations deep into him in a way he’d never felt them before.

He threw his head back with a throaty, desperate cry, “Fuck!”

Chrollo leaned over him, taking in his every reaction, “Does that feel good, kinky boy?”

Kurapika could only let out a hoarse growl, “God yes!”

He threw his head back again and cried out, hardly caring who heard him anymore as Chrollo spoke again, “Then this is going to melt your mind.”

He took the remote in hand, turning up the dial until it was at maximum intensity and Kurapika was screaming at the powerful sensations that wracked his entire body. Kurapika’s legs were gripped with spasms and jolts, Chrollo having to hold them steady to keep him from accidentally hurting himself. Chrollo let this go on for a while, admiring Kurapika’s primal reactions to being so overstimulated. He slowed the vibrator in intervals before turning it back up again, and he’d been absolutely right, Kurapika’s mind was completely wasted. He choked on his own spit, screaming and spasming beyond his control at the otherworldly pleasures Chrollo was assaulting him with.

Kurapika couldn’t form words as he slurred random sounds from his throat, somewhere in the recesses of his mind, he knew if he wanted to say the safe word, he wouldn’t be able to form it on his tongue in his current state. Fortunately, he had no desire to say such a word. His mind had never been so blank, so clear and free of anything except pure **ecstasy,** and he didn’t want that to stop.

Chrollo looked like he was getting off at just the sight of him writhing and wailing while he was toyed, “Keep singing for me, my sweet, little songbird.”

Kurapika cried out more loudly hearing the sweetness juxtaposed with the kinkiness, pulling so hard at his restraints that he momentarily feared he’d break the bedposts. He instinctively thrust his hips, lurching when the angle of the rod changed as his cock moved, striking his sweet spot oh so perfectly. He wailed, knowing he needed more of that feeling and continuing to thrust in order to work the insertion against himself.

Chrollo watched him closely, “Careful, don’t move too much or you could hurt yourself.”

Kurapika couldn’t care less in the moment, all he cared about was getting **more** of that shooting, blazing pleasure that made his fingers and toes tingle in its wake.

Chrollo grabbed his hips, slowing him down and stilling him, “I said easy,” at Kurapika’s desperate whine, he added, “I’ll take care of that before you injure yourself.”

Taking hold of his cock, Chrollo gently worked it in circular motions, making Kurapika’s cry in pleasure and stimulation from the constant vibrations coupled with the prodding of his spot. Hot tears streamed down his cheeks, but he knew they were merely his bodies response to having too much sensory information to process.

After a while, though, a new need ripped through him more powerfully than any of the others. His gut twisted, and he felt the powerful pulsing feeling he knew meant he was reaching his climax. He cried out, his mind going completely blank for a moment, but his body unable to release due to the obstruction of the rod and the compression of the ring.

The sound he made was more like a shriek than anything else, “Take it out!”

Chrollo obliged instantly, shutting off the vibrators and trying to calm him, “You need to relax first.”

Kurapika writhed powerfully, trying to break free so he could pull it out, “I can’t! Just take it out!”

The pressure that built up in his lower abdomen and cock was extreme, and shot forceful sensations of pain and pleasure through him in such amounts that he was in agony.

Chrollo stilled him again, “You need to relax or I can’t take it out without injuring you.”

Kurapika forced himself to lay his head back and try taking deep, slow breaths. It felt like an eternity before his muscles relaxed enough and Chrollo was able to slowly, painfully slide the insertion out after loosening the ring.

 

{REDACTED SCENE END}

 

He squeezed Kurapika firmly, making the blonde scream, “Fuck! Let go!”

He gave him a gentle look, “I will, but I need to do this for a moment. Just breathe.”

Kurapika choked, spluttering and coughing for a moment before he managed to relax enough for Chrollo to let go. Fluid poured from him, but it wasn’t the opaque white kind that he expected, it was clear and it drenched him.

He whimpered in pain, Chrollo taking hold of his cock after unstrapping the vibrator, “Easy, I’ll finish you right now. I told you to tell me _before_ you needed to release.”

Kurapika whined, all he wanted right now was sweet release, “I didn’t know it would hurt this bad.”

Chrollo scoffed, stroking him gently with his hand. Kurapika cried out, his cock had become incredibly sensitive and even the slow, rhythmic motion of Chrollo’s hand was driving him mad.

Chrollo kept that slow, steady motion as he spoke, “If I _really_ wanted to teach you a lesson right now, I would stroke you hard and fast and palm your tip with my other hand.”

Kurapika groaned, “Please don’t.”

Chrollo eyed him, but spoke comfortably, “Don’t worry, I won’t. But next time, listen to my warnings and instructions.”

Kurapika nodded absently, gasping as the familiar sensation returned to him, “Oh, please I’m so close.”

Chrollo worked him a little harder, making him moan freely as he orgasmed a second time in rapid succession. It was blinding, his whole world went white and his body spasmed and shook from head to toe at the extreme sensations that ripped through him from deep within. He was sure he screamed at the top of his lungs, and he was enthralled by the sheer volume of his orgasm. He completely soaked himself, his height lasting at least 40 seconds. He was slurring and coughing by the end of it while he shook uncontrollably.

Chrollo soothed him, “Shh… It’s okay, just breathe.”

Kurapika couldn’t even open his eyes for a moment, and when he did, all he could see were stars flashing across his field of view as he whimpered pathetically in Chrollo’s hold.

When he finally began to cool off, he was aware of just how much of a wreck he was. He was drenched in his own fluids, stunned by how much there was. His body was still trembling and he was still salivating uncontrollably.

Chrollo wiped some of his tears as he spoke to him, “Now you see why orgasms only last 4-10 seconds normally. And why only experienced people are supposed to use a sounding rod to reach their orgasm.”

Kurapika tried to say something, and he was a bit mortified to realize he still couldn’t form coherent words. Chrollo gazed down at him amusedly, “Be more careful next time, you damn brat.”

He let Kurapika breathe and relax for a while, but once he got his head back, Kurapika was aware that Chrollo had left the vibrator in his ass. He looked over at him, “Is it your turn to get off?”

Chrollo huffed, “Are you even up for that right now? Not to be rude but, you’re utterly trashed right now.”

Kurapika groaned, somehow still wanting just a little bit more, “What’s the matter **_boss?_** Don’t you want to fuck me like this?”

Kurapika was startled by the force of the hand around his throat and the feral look in Chrollo’s eyes, “Watch yourself, my noisy, little bitch. That loud mouth of yours is what got you into this mess.”

Kurapika finally understood the appeal of being called ‘my bitch’ during sex now that he was on the receiving end of the sexy taunt. Degradation wasn’t his thing like it was Chrollo’s, but that particular line stirred him up.

Chrollo had a bruising grip on Kurapika’s leg as he lifted it, positioning himself between his legs one more. He eased the vibrator out with care, not replacing it with his fingers, but instead landing a series of vicious, brutal slaps over Kurapika’s ass.

Kurapika lurched and cried out in pleasure, his entire body having grown extremely sensitive. Chrollo continued the savage treatment until he could see Kurapika visibly flinching away from the strikes, “You wear my mark well, you look good like this.”

Kurapika moaned, he didn’t have a degradation kink, but a _praise_ kink was a different story. Chrollo lowered his leg some, pulling off his black swim trunks with force and exposing himself. He was panting heavily, clearly having surrendered to his carnal lust. He grabbed the bottle of lube and crudely slathered it over his cock before pressing himself to Kurapika’s entrance. In a moment of awareness, he eased himself slowly in so as not to hurt Kurapika, but the moment Kurapika’s body accepting his thick length, that consideration was gone.

Chrollo had never fucked him in such an untamed, savage way before. Kurapika wailed to the heavens at how powerfully Chrollo took him. He ravaged his body with full, powerful strokes and a maddening pace. Kurapika thought it was inhuman, how wildly he fucked him while still keeping a rhythm that completely blew his mind his post-orgasm vulnerability. He could feel tears again, not even sure if he was entirely conscious or if his mind had seriously melted due to the powerful and **hot** sensation brutalizing his body.

Chrollo gripped his throat tightly, making his head spin faster as he spoke, “Say it again.”

Kurapika took a moment to get his bearings, completely pervaded with the feeling of Chrollo fucking him senseless, but he knew what Chrollo wanted to hear, “Oh, please boss! Fuck me harder **boss!** ”

Chrollo let out a primeval sound from somewhere deep in his chest at hearing that. Kurapika didn’t think it was possible, but he adjusted his angle before thrusting even faster and harder, right into Kurapika’s already hypersensitive sweet spot. The sensation crashed over Kurapika like a violent wave tossing him about. He completely lost it, his mind going blank as he reached a futile orgasm. He lost all sense of awareness of himself and his body, so much so that he didn’t even hear himself say it.

“ ** _Mercy!_** ”

Chrollo slowed instantly, gently easing himself out while Kurapika gulped for air, choking from how tight Chrollo’s grip had grown in the heat of the moment. A large handprint remained over Kurapika’s throat as he tried to gather himself. He was aware of how shaky Chrollo’s breath was, realizing that he’d reached his own orgasm by the way his lips were wet and swollen and the vacant, hazy look in his dark eyes. And as he lay there catching his breath, Kurapika realized what had set Chrollo off in the first place.

 

Those beautiful scarlet eyes had been blazing the whole time.

 

…

 

Chrollo had done a complete U-turn after their intense adventure. He’d cleaned Kurapika up with a warm rag and kissed away every lingering bruise on his body.

He took the time to massage lotion and oil deep into his muscles, and now Kurapika was redressed and laying happily beside him while he read. His whole body was warm, but he could tell he’d be sore tomorrow thanks to the aggressiveness of their love-making that night.

He gazed up at Chrollo’s drowsy profile, he looked incredibly handsome like that. Kurapika knew he’d be falling asleep any minute now, he’d been sleepily rubbing his eyes and yawning with increasing frequency.

A thought crossed his mind, “So… how many people do you think heard me?”

Chrollo huffed, a smile gracing his beautiful lips, “The whole hotel would’ve heard you **if** I hadn’t used a special little trick of mine to render our little bubble effectively sound-proof.”

Kurapika sighed in relief, “How’d you do that? Nen?”

Chrollo nodded, “It was an early ability I picked up from an absolute recluse. I thought it would be useful for making sure nobody overheard important conversations, but I think it’s far more useful when used like this.”

He gave Kurapika a wink as he spoke, making Kurapika hum, “You gonna sleep?”

Chrollo lightly closed the book, gazing fondly down at the blonde, “You’re wasted huh?”

Kurapika just murmured a confirmation into the pillow, not even opening his eyes. Chrollo laughed softly, curling himself around Kurapika and holding him close as they both drifted off into sleep.


	15. Divided

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just want to give a heads up that the following chapter(s) are going to be really heavy angst and trigger warnings will be posted at the beginning of the chapter as well as as the beginning of potentially upsetting scenes so that anyone can skip those particular scenes with ease!  
> Sorry for the long update period, I had midterms this last week and they got to be really time consuming!

Every inch of Kurapika’s body ached as he gargled his mouthwash. He could no longer tell what was sore from the crash and what was sore from Chrollo. He spat out the strong, alcoholic fluid with a grimace, awkwardly noting how his hips ached as he leaned over the sink.

Sighing, he turned and stepped back into the main room. Chrollo was still snoring happily, having bundled up the blankets once Kurapika had gotten up so that he could still cuddle something.

Kurapika shook his head amusedly, unbelievable.

Glancing at the clock, he decided not to wake Chrollo from his content sleep and instead headed down to the lobby, pulling his collar extra high to hide the hand-shaped bruise that had formed on his neck. He’d found a certain kind of thrill to see the bruise that morning, but at the same time, he couldn’t bear the thought of anyone else seeing the dark mark on his throat. Even more pronounced were the massive bruises over his ass, but that was easily hidden at the very least.

 

He picked out the same things Chrollo had grabbed the day before, adding a second croissant in case he wanted one. When he returned, Chrollo was awake and had clearly just showered.

Kurapika looked at him in surprise, “You shower fast.”

Chrollo dried his hair haphazardly with a towel, wearing a pair of sweatpants but leaving his upper half exposed, “I woke up the moment I noticed you weren’t here. You took your card and I figured you were probably just getting food, so I made it a point to finish quickly.”

He eyed the plate intently as he spoke, and Kurapika snorted at his transparency, “You hungry?”

Chrollo smiled faintly, “Starving,” more cheekily, he added, “You sure gave me a workout last night.”

Kurapika blushed, “That was your own doing.”

Chrollo looked at him in mock innocence, “Ah, that’s right. You were set on doing it in the jacuzzi.”

Kurapika burned, shoving his plate at him, “That is not what happened and you know it.”

Chrollo chuckled, but abandoned his teasing in favor of his food. Despite the warm atmosphere around them, Kurapika noticed how Chrollo ate in an almost tense silence. He didn’t have his usual mirth about him, and he looked lost in thought.

Kurapika noticed at some point that he’d stopped eating entirely, “I’m sorry.”

Chrollo blinked, looking jolted, “What?”

Kurapika nodded at his half-full plate, “You don’t look too thrilled with what I got you.”

Chrollo furrowed his brow in apology, “It’s not that, I’m just daydreaming is all. I appreciate the breakfast.”

Kurapika tipped his head, “You’re not just daydreaming, you look tense. Is something wrong?”

Chrollo squinted a bit, looking away, “I have a bad feeling, that’s all.”

Kurapika gazed at him, “What about?”

Chrollo brought his hand to his face, mulling, “I don’t know… I’m just worried.”

Kurapika hummed, “Like your last bad feeling? When we got hit?”

Chrollo pursed his lips and nodded slowly, “Something like that… I’ve been thinking about something…”

He took long pauses, making Kurapika worry, “Thinking about what?”

Chrollo swallowed hard, “I was thinking… maybe it’s time to split up.”

Kurapika didn’t know what he expected, but it wasn’t that, and his heart lodged in his chest, “What do you mean? Why?”

Chrollo glanced quickly up at him, “I’m worried. I’ve got this heavy feeling and I can’t shake it, and I don’t want you getting caught up in anything.”

Kurapika stared at him, “So you’re just going to send me away? Just like that? After… everything?”

Chrollo sighed, “It’s not like that, I’m not banishing you to another dimension. I just don’t want you to be in danger because of me.”

Kurapika huffed, still feeling cold and hurt, “You’ve never been worried about that before. I thought you felt I was safest at your side?”

Chrollo closed his eyes as if he knew how scathing his next words would be, “You could use Nen then.”

It felt like a punch had been delivered to Kurapika’s gut, and he found himself speechless in hurt and anger.

Chrollo gave him a sorry look, “I just want to do what’s best for you. And keeping you cooped up in some underground cellar for weeks at a time, never knowing when you’ll be able to go outside or feel the sun or talk to someone, that’s not right.”

Kurapika felt his shoulders droop, “Are you… rescinding our deal?”

Chrollo blinked slowly, “Do you want me to do that?”

Kurapika’s hands trembled a bit, he knew he was making excuses, but there was some sense to them as well, “No. If I do that, you could hurt Gon, Killua and Leorio.”

Chrollo looked slighted, “After everything, you think I’d do that?”

Kurapika scowled, “I didn’t think you’d throw me out like trash because I was too weak either but hey, I guess you’re full of surprises.”

Chrollo looked genuinely hurt, “That’s not what this is about and you know it. I thought you’d be happy to go and get back to your friends?”

 

Kurapika snorted at him, “I guess you didn’t know me so well after all.”

Chrollo sighed heavily, “I’m not throwing you out, you know. I’m just trying to protect you.”

Kurapika let himself slump a bit, he knew he was overreacting, “Whatever you say.”

Chrollo gazed at him for a moment, “It doesn’t have to be forever.”

Kurapika gave him a skeptical look, “How would that work?”

Chrollo mulled for a moment, “Well, you lay low while I figure out what’s going on, and once I do, we can link up again.”

Kurapika gazed at the floor, “And what about in between? What if you never figure out what your gut feeling’s telling you?”

Chrollo looked at him, “Have some faith. But in the meantime, we can keep in touch by phone.”

Kurapika scoffed, the feeling of Chrollo’s touch lingering over his body, “By phone?”

Chrollo shrugged a bit, “It’s something.”

Kurapika slouched, “You feel that strongly about this?”

Chrollo nodded solemnly, “I do. And I know I’d never forgive myself if you got killed because of me.”

Kurapika found a little bit of comfort in that, “And we can keep in touch?”

Chrollo glanced at him, “Yes, that’s right. And if you decide you still want, the moment I’ve tied up these loose ends, you and I can get together again.”

Kurapika sighed painfully, “You mean that?”

Chrollo smiled faintly, “Of course I do.”

He reached into the nightstand next to them, pulling out a cell phone and handing it to Kurapika as he continued, “My numbers already saved on there.”

Kurapika narrowed his eyes at him, “How long have you been planning this?”

Chrollo tipped his head, “Since the crash.”

Kurapika scowled a bit, “That’s why you were so flirty?”

Chrollo noticed his look with a small frown, “Affectionate, yes.”

Kurapika snorted, “No, flirty. Anyway,” he added with a sigh, “What do we do now?”

Chrollo thought for a moment, “I’m going to get you a disguise, and we’ll split up here. You find a place to stay, connect with Gon and them or fly solo, and call me when you’re safe.”

Kurapika sighed, “What about you?”

Chrollo shifted a bit, “I’ll be doing the same. I’m sending Feitan and Shalnark ahead. I’ll find a safe place to stay and wait for your call.”

Kurapika let his eyes wander for a bit, turning the cell phone in his hands, “How long will it be?”

Chrollo gently stroked him, making Kurapika lean into the touch for the fear he would never feel it again, “Hopefully not long. I’m going to focus on pinning down the person who’s after me, and once I do, I plan to end this. Definitively.”

Kurapika stared at him for a long moment, he still didn’t want to leave Chrollo. He looked at him closely for a while, taking in every detail of his profile, the way his soft, black hair had grown and now fell over his eyes, those lush, full lips and the way they’d felt on his skin. A sudden need overwhelmed him, and he grabbed Chrollo’s face, turning him so that they were looking at each other. Chrollo looked slightly surprised, but he gazed back at Kurapika, searching his eyes.

The need to feel close drove him as he pulled Chrollo in for a kiss. Chrollo let out a soft ‘mmph’ into the kiss, but his eyes glowed with warmth as he kissed him back gently. For a moment, Kurapika enjoyed his tender response, but he needed to feel more of him. He grabbed him tightly, pulling with more force until Chrollo was smothered by him.

Kurapika rolled his weight over him, seating himself atop Chrollo, feeling the other man’s hands grip his hips in surprise. He ignored his shock, forcing his tongue into Chrollo’s mouth. Chrollo bridged his hips, his eyes widening in surprise at Kurapika’s forcefulness.

Kurapika ignored him as he pushed lightly against Kurapika, trying to ease his weight off. He kissed him harder for a moment, but Chrollo pushed him off.

He gazed down at him, a mix of confusion and frustration, “What’s wrong?”

Chrollo sighed, stroking him gently, “Take it easy, you’re just upset.”

Kurapika glared at him, “Don’t try to tell me you don’t want me.”

Chrollo placated him with a soft smile and a sweet kiss, “I would never deny that. I just want you to relax, that’s all.”

Kurapika scoffed in annoyance, getting off of Chrollo, “Whatever.”

Chrollo made a face, “Come on… you know I’m trying to protect you because I care for you.”

Kurapika snorted, looking away, “Yeah right.”

Chrollo stood up, wrapping his arms around Kurapika’s waist and hugging him despite his angry protest, “I just want to keep you safe.”

Kurapika squirmed against Chrollo’s powerful arms, “Let go!”

Chrollo held him for a moment, “Calm down. I told you it’s not forever, I just want to protect you.”

Kurapika jabbed at him with his elbow, “I said let go.”

Chrollo sighed, loosening his grip, “All right.”

Kurapika stepped away from him, still swirling with emotions, “What do we do now?”

Chrollo picked up his phone, “I’m going to have Shal bring you your disguise. We’ll leave an hour apart, you go first. Then find a safe place to stay and call me. When I finish this, I’ll call you and we can go from there.”

Kurapika sighed, his anger melting some, “All right.”

Chrollo nodded slightly, turning his attention to his phone and calling Shalnark.

 

…

 

Kurapika sighed, pulling out the contents of the bags Shalnark had brought over that afternoon. He gave Chrollo a look, “You want me to dress as a woman?”

Chrollo didn’t seem to be teasing him or finding humor in it, “Yes. You have a slight frame and you’re pretty, it’ll look natural on you and it’ll be a more thorough disguise than just simply dying your hair.”

Kurapika saw sense in that, he didn’t mind disguising himself as a woman but he had been miffed to think Chrollo would find it funny, “All right, can you help me?”

Chrollo smiled faintly, “Sure.”

 

Kurapika pulled his shirt off, wrapping a simple, nude corset around his waist. He held it in place while speaking to Chrollo, “Don’t pull it too tightly.”

Chrollo snugged it, pulling the laces firmly, “I don’t need to, you have very prominent curves already.”

Kurapika glared at him, “Just hurry up.”

Chrollo furrowed his brows but finished lacing it, “You’re still mad?”

Kurapika snorted, “Hand me the clothes.”

Chrollo obliged, handing him a pair of slim fitting, white pants and a lilac button-up blouse, “This will compliment your hair and eyes delightfully.”

Kurapika ignored him as he got dressed, though he realized quickly that Chrollo was right. Chrollo picked up a shiny, golden brooch shaped like a flower and fastened it over the ribbon tied in a bow on his blouse.

Kurapika eyed him, “You’re having fun with this aren’t you?”

Chrollo smiled a bit, but not overly humorous, “Style is important. Don’t you want to look good?”

Kurapika huffed, “I don’t really care either way. Help me with the wig cap.”

Chrollo helped him tuck his hair back and fasten the long, wavy blonde wig, “You look so pretty like this.”

Kurapika shrugged him away, taking the makeup bag with him as he came to stand before the large mirror in front of the sinks, “On second thought, we probably should’ve put the wig on last.”

Chrollo came to stand next to him, “Mm, probably. You ever worn makeup before?”

Kurapika gave him a deadpan look, “No.”

Chrollo tipped his head, “Then, do you even know what you’re doing?”

Kurapika scoffed, holding up his phone, “That’s what they make tutorials for.”

Chrollo brimmed with amusement, “I can’t wait to see how this turns out.”

Kurapika scrolled through the tutorial, picking up what he guessed was primer and slathering it over his freshly washed skin. He smoothed on some foundation while Chrollo watched him with fond amusement, “You missed a spot.”

Kurapika felt his fingers smooth some of the cream on the back of his neck, holding the wig clear with his other hand. When he’d finished, Kurapika continued following the steps until he felt satisfied.

Chrollo looked almost unamused, “You did that a little too well.”

Kurapika pouted, feeling the gloss he’d put on as he did, “Were you hoping I’d screw it up?”

Chrollo leaned forward a bit, “I was hoping you’d let me put on your lipstick for you.”

Kurapika turned away, straightening his wig, “Not a chance.”

The momentary comfort he’d enjoyed as he’d gotten dressed vanished from him as he let out a heavy sigh.

Chrollo eyed him as he did, “Are you ready?”

Kurapika didn’t want to be, “I guess so, yeah.”

Chrollo stood up, wrapping his arms around his waist and burying his face against the curve of his neck, “I’m sorry this is so sudden, but I care about you too much to risk you getting hurt. Please forgive me.”

His voice was so soft and silky that Kurapika couldn’t help understanding, “I know. I just wish you would’ve told me you were planning this.”

Chrollo hummed, still holding Kurapika, “I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure until last night but I know this is the right thing to do.”

Kurapika leaned into his hold, his voice a quiet whisper, “I know. I know.”

Chrollo placed a soft kiss against Kurapika’s cheek, holding him for a moment longer before retracting his arms. Kurapika turned to give him one, long look, taking in all of the details of his face and burning them into his mind before he picked up the phone and left without another word.

 

…

 

Chrollo sat swirling his drink, feeling heavy and depressed. He’d been worried about giving Kurapika Stockholm Syndrome, but now that they were separated, he had to wonder if he hadn’t given himself a case of Stockholm as well. He sighed, looking at the tea he’d gotten as it swished in the cup, moving the straw as it did. He’d only drank about a quarter of it, but he’d been sitting long enough that he needed to use the bathroom.

He stood up, walking lazily to the bathroom while Kurapika occupied his thoughts. He did what he had to do, taking his time washing his hands in the warm water, then splashing some of it on his face, letting it run off in drops before drying off with some paper towels.

Chrollo returned to his table at the same time his food was brought to him. He gave a polite nod to the lady who’d brought it before sitting back down, his appetite felt nonexistent as he poked at the salad. Eventually, he built up enough courage to pour the vinegar over the salad and take a couple bites. Picking up his drink, he paused as his gut felt suddenly cold. He shivered a bit, recognizing the feeling of being watched immediately. He froze just before bringing the straw to his lips, glancing around the store, but no one’s eyes were on him. Chrollo retracted the drink, taking a careful look at his food. Nothing looked out of place, until he glanced at the drink.

He had a habit of chewing on his straw when he was upset, and the end of the straw facing up was undamaged. He took another look around, but no one within the restaurant was watching him. Chrollo stood up, turning to leave and keeping a cautious watch on everything around him, knowing he had to get somewhere safe to call Kurapika and warn him not to stay alone.

Chrollo’s eyes shifted quickly around, taking in everything around him in case someone attacked him. He ducked quickly into an alley, slipping into the darkness and ducking beneath some rubble before scaling a fire escape swiftly and silently. From his vantage point on the roof, he scoured the landscape beneath him, but no one stood out. Picking up his phone, he quickly dialed Kurapika’s number, something like panic setting in at the thought of him being targeted in his weakened state. He stood stark still as the phone rang, and continued to ring.

 

But Kurapika would never get that call.

 

…

 

Kurapika felt cold and empty as he fixed his lipstick in a shop window. He was almost amused by how good he looked in this disguise, but the yawing loneliness in his gut made it impossible to feel any kind of joy.

With a heavy sigh, he turned away from the shopfront and started back down the street. He was wandering aimlessly; he didn’t know what he wanted to do. He didn’t want to go back to Gon, Killua and Leorio, didn’t think he deserved that right after everything that had happened. What he really wanted was to go back to yesterday, to freely enjoying Chrollo’s company without another worry in the world.

He was jolted from his dark thoughts when he bumped into a girl and nearly knocked her over.

He steadied her with a start, “I’m so sorry!”

She brushed him off quickly, her entire demeanor changing as she quickly ducked around him and ran off. Kurapika scowled, gently rubbing his arm where he’d collided with her. He immediately realized what had happened as he felt the abnormally sore spot. Glancing down, Kurapika felt a jolt of panic to see the single drop of blood seeping through his shirt.

He tried to calm himself as he kept walking, gripping as tightly as possible above the injection site and looking around desperately, hoping to find someone to help him. There wasn’t a soul on the street as he began to feel dizzy. A moment of clarity made him pick up his phone and attempt to dial Chrollo. He stumbled heavily, his vision blurring and fear pulsing through him as he realized how quickly the drug was working. He gripped his phone tenaciously, his legs beginning to give out on him. He could see a car coming down the street as he continued to blindly fumble at the phone in his hands. In a last bout of desperation, Kurapika flung himself into the road in the vague prayer that someone could help him.

He was faintly aware that the phone in his hands rang, but before he could swipe to answer it, the car he’d hoped could save him swerved suddenly, and before he could react in his sedated state, it hit him.

 

…

 

Kurapika woke slowly, but everything was pitch black. He was cold, but he couldn’t feel anything else. Vaguely, Kurapika became aware that he was suspended. He let out a faint groan, pain beginning to seep through him from his shoulders down, and Kurapika realized he was hanging from a rack, his shoulders dislocated in agony.

A voice broke the silence, strangely distorted, “I was beginning to think you’d never wake up.”

He knew what he wanted to stay, but when he spoke, all he could do was slur his words uselessly.

A hand stroked his cheek, the voice becoming slightly clearer, “Don’t bother talking yet, you’ll have aphasia until the ketamine is out of your system.”

Kurapika tried to speak again, but once more all he did was slur.

The hand that had caressed his cheek slapped him hard, “I said don’t bother.”

Something nagged the back of his mind, I know that voice…

He tried to lift his head, but his body was still numb.

A hand gripped his jaw, a voice in his ear, “Do you know who I am?”

The sentence was familiar, and the voice grew even clearer until his heart was racing.

The hand squeezed tighter, until it hurt, “You should. You know who I am.”

Kurapika murmured something, not quite as nonsensical as before, but still not coherent.

The man laughed lightly into his ear, “Why don’t I give you a hint?”

Kurapika felt his thumbs slip beneath the fabric covering his eyes, slowly removing the blindfold.

The room was dark as Kurapika looked around, still unable to lift his head. A hand gripped his hair, lifting his head though the room was still too dark to make anything out. A low, malevolent laugh sounded in his ear, and he definitely recognized the voice.

Kurapika trembled in fear and confusion as the man stepped into his field of view. It was dark, but Kurapika could make out distinguishing features. Knee high boots, a long, black coat with a furred collar with no shirt underneath, and sleek hair that was combed back.

A sadistic smile teased those familiar lips, “Recognize me, Kurapika?”

Kurapika felt a tear of uncertainty and dread threatening to fall as he finally managed to get a single word off his lips, “Chrollo?”


	16. Breaking Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay so, massive trigger warnings for;  
> (Graphic) Severe torture, acid/chemical burns, burns, electric torture, beatings, and (non-graphic) sexual assault
> 
> That aside, every scene containing triggering content is specifically tagged and labeled at the beginning and end of the scene so that skipping chapters that may be triggering to you is easy! However, the whole chapter is pretty rough so please be mindful before reading!

Kurapika trembled as Chrollo approached him with slow, contemplative strides. He still couldn’t speak well, but feeling was beginning to come back to his body and he was aware of a prominent pain in his hip from when he’d been hit as well as the horrible angle that his arms were twisted at.

It was hard to see through the darkness of the room, but Kurapika could feel the malevolence pouring off of Chrollo as he finally managed to get some words out, “What’s going on?”

Chrollo glared at him before landing a hard punch into his sternum, “Don’t play dumb.”

All Kurapika could do was cough in pain, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Why are you doing this?”

Another punch, harder than the last one, connected with his abdomen, “Make this easy for yourself and tell me.”

Kurapika coughed harder, scowling in pain as his spasms shook his dislocated arms, “Chrollo… I don’t know!”

Chrollo took hold of his chin, lifting his face until their eyes met, “Then why don’t we jog your memory?”

Chrollo drew his fist back, landing a series of blows against Kurapika’s gut, making him cough and spit.

Kurapika let out a groan, “Please… why are you doing this?”

Chrollo stepped back with a sigh, “You’re really going to play hard to get? Don’t be so stubborn.”

Kurapika gazed desperately at him, “Please just tell me what you want!”

Chrollo picked something up from the ground, “Last chance to give up easily.”

Kurapika couldn’t see what he’d grabbed, but he felt his hands working his shirt off, making him swallow hard, “I don’t know what you’re talking about…”

Chrollo stopped working his shirt off slowly and ripped it away instead, “Fine… It’s more fun to beat it out of you anyway.”

 

** {REDACTED SCENE} **

Contains graphic violence

 

 

Chrollo drew his arm back, striking Kurapika hard with what he guessed was a cane. Kurapika yelped in pain, “Just tell me what you want!”

He was silenced with another savage crack against his back. He could feel heat running down his back and was aware he was bleeding. Chrollo twirled the cane before delivering a savage beating, leaving Kurapika on the verge of tears as he cried out in pain.

Chrollo let out a contempt snort, “Tell me what you know.”

Kurapika choked on his own spit, still a bit numb from the tranquilizer, “Okay, just tell me what it is you want to know.”

Chrollo struck him again, “That’s thirty strokes. I’m going to give you a chance to answer my questions. If you refuse, then I’ll give you thirty more.”

Kurapika held in his whimpers, “Okay, just tell me what you want.”

Chrollo tapped him with the cane in a sort of warning, “First, are you the mole?”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, “What?”

Chrollo gave him a firm whack, “Answer the question.”

Kurapika trembled at the contact, “No. I’m not the mole. I’ve been with you the whole time!”

Chrollo took a long pause, “Do you know who the mole is?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, “No, I don’t.”

Chrollo struck him hard, driving the breath from his body as it cracked his ribs, “Don’t lie.”

Kurapika trembled, “I’m sorry. I do know.”

Chrollo touched the cane to his back, “Who is it?”

Kurapika briefly considered what he was doing, but decided he didn’t owe Hisoka his loyalty after the man had crossed him, “It’s Hisoka.”

Chrollo tapped him, “How do you know?”

Kurapika felt cold, “He sold you out to the Zoldyck’s.”

Chrollo didn’t hit him, “How do you know? And why did he do it?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, everything hurting, “He told me, while you were away. And I don’t know,” at another warning tap, he added, “I really don’t. He doesn’t tell people his motives.”

Chrollo seemed satisfied, deciding not to hit him, “And you didn’t say anything? You haven’t told a soul that you know who the mole is?”

Vaguely, Kurapika thought the question was strange, Chrollo would know if he’d told anyone, but the pain and the muscle tranquilizer made his head too fuzzy to think, “No. I haven’t told a soul.”

Chrollo snorted a bit, “Why not?”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, something was off but he just couldn’t think, no matter how hard he tried, “I don’t know… I just didn’t.”

Chrollo struck him, making him cry out, muttering under his breath, “Good.”

Kurapika trembled in pain and fear, “What?”

Another lash made him choke again, “Nothing. Does anyone else suspect Hisoka?”

Kurapika’s head lulled, he was feeling dizzy, “I- don’t know, I think… Shalnark… and Kortopi? I’m not sure. Why- are you asking this?”

He felt the air shift, as though he touched a nerve, “That’s enough for now.”

Kurapika felt relieved for a moment before Chrollo gave him another savage beating. Kurapika lost count of how many times he was struck, at some point he succumbed to the pain and drugs in his system and lost consciousness.

 

 

** {REDACTED SCENE END} **

 

 

Kurapika woke to a jolt of agony coursing through his body. He let out a feeble groan, trying to lift his head and look around.

Chrollo’s voice cut through the darkness, “Are you awake?”

Kurapika debated not answering, but he heard him stand up anyway, “Sort of…”

Kurapika realized for the first time how small the room was now that Chrollo stood directly before him, “Good. You’re going to answer some more questions. And this time,” he fastened something cold and sharp around his neck, pressing into his chest and the soft flesh where his neck met his jaw, “You won’t be getting any rest.”

Kurapika tried to swallow, the steel prongs pressing deeper, “What more do you need?”

Chrollo shifted through something else, “Don’t drop your head. If you don’t answer my questions,” he touched the two ends of jumper cables together, creating a storm of sparks and loud crackling, “I’ll shock you with these.”

Kurapika whimpered, “Why?”

 

** {REDACTED SCENE} **

Contains electric shock torture

 

 

Chrollo ignored him, coming to stand close to him with the cables in hand, “Who else suspects Hisoka as the mole?”

Kurapika was frightened and confused, “Shalnark and Kortopi, I already told you this.”

He came closer, “Who else? Does anyone know for sure?”

Kurapika trembled, having lost feeling in his arms overnight, “I don’t know. I thought you didn’t really trust him either? Why are you asking me this?”

Chrollo took the clamps in hand, making Kurapika close his eyes in fear. He allowed the teeth of the cables to bite into a generous amount of skin and fat over his nipples, alarming him in more ways than one, “Do you or anyone else know who Hisoka is working for?”

Kurapika felt the steel teeth pierce his skin, “I don’t know!”

Chrollo picked up a car battery charger, inspecting the amps, “Don’t lie.”

Kurapika was nearly wailing in desperation, “I don’t know! I swear I don’t know!”

Chrollo let out a ‘humph’ before turning the dial to the lowest setting and turning the charger on. Kurapika’s body was seized with the current, it was a pain like he’d never felt before. All his muscles grew rigid, and his chest felt like it was being burned, crushed, and split open all at once. The current passed through the steel fork, heating it and sending the horrible shock into his jaw.

When Chrollo finally shut it off, Kurapika could do little more than drool, unable to even spit due to the fork. The steel was still hot, burning his skin and allowing a horrible smell to waft up to him from his own seared flesh.

His muscles jumped and spasmed in the wake of the electric shock as Chrollo spoke to him again, “That’s your warning. Every time you lie or refuse to answer, that’s what’s going to happen.”

Kurapika let out a feeble sound, foaming at the mouth and still unable to swallow or spit.

Chrollo spoke again, “Can you speak?”

Kurapika struggled for a moment, his voice nearly inaudible, “Barely.”

Chrollo huffed, “That’s fine. Does anyone know who the mole works for?”

Kurapika almost wanted to lie, to throw someone, anyone, under the bus, but he feared that would get him shocked if Chrollo knew he was lying, “No. If they do, they haven’t said anything.”

Chrollo cooed to him, his breath rank in a way Kurapika could never remember it being, “That’s good, keep behaving for me and this’ll be over soon.”

Kurapika trembled, he wanted that so badly right now that he ignored the feeling in his gut that told him none of this made sense, that something was very wrong, “What else do you need to know?”

Chrollo still held the charger, “Has anyone gotten a lead on the person responsible for the car bombing?”

Kurapika furrowed his brows in confusion, “No. Shalnark and Feitan were looking into it, but I never heard who-”

Chrollo didn’t even let him finish before administering another horrid shock. Kurapika couldn’t even scream in pain as he was allowed to writhe in agony before finally, Chrollo shut it off again.

Chrollo hummed as he retched, “I told you not to lie.”

Kurapika spat desperately, “I didn’t!”

Chrollo threatened to flip the switch again, “Shalnark and Feitan didn’t discover _anything_ from their investigation?”

Kurapika’s head spun, he hadn’t even meant to lie, he’d been so distraught he’d completely forgotten, “They- They think it was the mafia. They said it was someone organized and rich, but not strong enough to fight the Spider’s one-on-one. Don’t you remember this? You were there!”

Kurapika was interrupted by another shock, a short one before Chrollo spoke again, “All you are to do is answer my questions, understood?”

Kurapika couldn’t fight the tears that fell from his eyes, “I understand.”

Chrollo hummed again, “What are they doing right now?”

Kurapika’s head swam in confusion, _does he suspect **everyone** of betraying him? Is that why he’s doing all this?_

Kurapika hadn’t realized how long he was taking to reply until he was jolted by Chrollo, “Answer me now.”

Kurapika swallowed hard, “They were still investigating, but they were interrupted when Silva Zoldyck was hired. I don’t know what else they’re doing right now.”

Chrollo mulled for a moment, “What was their most recent lead?”

Kurapika coughed before replying, “They think that the Lusko mafia is involved.”

He could feel Chrollo tense, and he was given no warning as electricity passed through him again. Kurapika felt certain his heart stopped as he descended into anguish, it felt like an eternity before the torment ceased. He convulsed, unable to breathe or think.

When he finally regained his sense, he keened at Chrollo, “I answered your question! I did what you wanted!”

Kurapika’s eyes had adjusted just enough that he could make out Chrollo’s cold, heartless gaze as he spoke, “Do they know who ordered the hit?”

Kurapika couldn’t help but allow a few tears to fall, “No…”

Chrollo hummed, “All right.”

 

** {REDACTED SCENE END} **

 

 

He took hold of the clamps, peeling the steel teeth away and taking a good deal of Kurapika’s skin with him. Kurapika silently willed him to remove the Heretic’s Fork that pierced his skin, but Chrollo left it in place.

Kurapika was afraid of being beaten again, but he spoke anyway, “Please… please take it off.”

Chrollo ignored him for a moment, shifting through something before he finally unlatched the fork. Kurapika gasped in relief, but it was short lived as Chrollo wrapped a pronged collar around his throat, fastening a battery to the back of it. Chrollo pulled it tight, so that the sharp prongs pierced the back of his neck while the other barbs scratched his skin raw.

He clipped a chain to the front of the collar, letting it hang while he unceremoniously dropped Kurapika from the rack, making him cry in anguish. He roughly cracked his shoulders back into place, binding him tightly by his wrists and ankles instead. A sob escaped Kurapika as he was hooked to a latch on the floor, hardly allowing him enough slack to sit up as he was leashed to the cold, hard concrete.

Chrollo set down something metallic within Kurapika’s reach, “If you need to drink, you’ll drink from this bowl.”

Kurapika glared mutinously, “Like a dog? I’d rather die.”

Chrollo stepped hard onto the chain, slamming Kurapika’s face into the ground while the steel prongs bit into his flesh, “I’m sure you would. But dying is the easy part, and I’m not about to let you off so easily.”

As he spoke, he picked up a remote and clicked a button, delivering a strong shock into the back of his neck and making his whole body spasm again.

While Kurapika tried to clear the foaming saliva that choked him, Chrollo spoke again, “If you need to use the bathroom, there’s a bucket with a lid here. If you refuse to use it, I’ll leave you to wallow in your own filth.”

Kurapika spat, “What if I throw up?”

Chrollo sounded disinterested, “Are you feeling sick?”

Kurapika could only nod, allowing him to continue, “Try to puke in the bucket then.”

He finished by kicking the bucket at Kurapika, who grabbed it just in time for his nausea to overwhelm him. There was hardly anything to throw up as Kurapika wretched and convulsed violently, gripping the bucket tightly in his bound hands.

Kurapika was painfully thirsty by the end of the ordeal, tears streaming over his cheeks from pain and the strain of vomiting. Rather pitifully, he looked up at Chrollo, “Please… can I have water?”

Chrollo seemed satisfied by how pitiful he sounded, because he poured a canister of water into the bowl. Kurapika winced, his pride screaming and begging him not to crawl across the floor and lap like a dog at the water bowl.

Despite himself, thirst drove Kurapika as he shakily dragged himself to the bowl. Chrollo laughed mockingly at him, but he ignored him no matter how much it burned him to do so. He pressed his lips to the water and sucked it in, gulping shamefully as he satisfied his thirst.

Chrollo towered over him as he finished, jeering at him, “Pathetic.”

Kurapika spat on him, his patience worn out. Chrollo retaliated with a jaw-splitting kick to his face before shocking him with the collar again. Kurapika spat out a piece of a tooth as he coughed.

Chrollo stepped on the chain again, keeping Kurapika’s nose pressed into the hard floor, “You should get some rest. You’ll need it if you want to survive.”

Kurapika cleared his bloodied nose as he was allowed to sit up again, watching in hopelessness as Chrollo left, closing a door behind him and confining Kurapika to a space that wasn’t even large enough for him to stretch to full length.

He laid still for a while, agony and desolation overcoming him until all he could do was allow himself to cry. After some time though, he steeled his nerves, _I am not going to give up. I am not going to die here._

Gathering his strength, Kurapika struggled into a hunched sitting position, tucking his bound legs under him and beginning to try and work his hands free of the ropes tying them. He clamped his jaw at the pain of his raw skin as he worked his wrists back and forth to loosen the rope. Kurapika didn’t know how long he’d been at it, only a tiny amount of light reached the room, and it didn’t correspond with day or night. He guessed he was underground, the air was damp and rich, the temperature didn’t fluctuate.

Kurapika pushed hard, flaring his wrists and enduring the pain of his thumb dislocating as he yanked his hands free. He panted, gathering his will as he gripped his thumb in his teeth before wrenching it back into place, groaning at the pain in his fractured jaw.

He took a breather before working to untie his ankles, which went much more smoothly. Finally, he began feeling around the collar, trying to find a weak point that he could use to remove it. No matter how hard he tried, Kurapika couldn’t find a weak point in the collar, and his very sore shoulders screamed at him. Chrollo had latched it beneath the battery, and every time Kurapika tried to pull it free, he caused wires to touch and shocked himself. He tenaciously kept trying after the first few jolts, but his body was eventually overwhelmed, and he could do no more than lie there in the cramped, dark space.

 

…

 

Kurapika was awakened rudely as a bucket of cold water was thrown over him. He sat up with a jolt, greeted with a powerful kick that nearly knocked him unconscious.

Chrollo glowered down at him, pressing his boot to his chest, “You managed to get the ligatures off, I’m impressed.”

Kurapika struggled to breathe beneath his pronounced weight, so Chrollo continued, “I’ll just have to tie you tighter this time.”

Kurapika struggled against him, but only for a moment before he was shocked and rendered immobile. Chrollo tightly bound his hands while he struggled to recover. Once finished, Chrollo unlatched the chain holding him to the floor and stood him up by his hair before clamping the wooden rack over his bound wrists again.

Kurapika let pout a feeble whine as he knew what was coming next as Chrollo took hold of a rope, “Do you have to do that? I’ll tell you what you want.”

Chrollo ignored him, yanking the rope taut until he heard Kurapika’s joints pop. Kurapika ground his teeth, braving the pain from the wooden rack as Chrollo picked something up.

He tinkered with something for a moment before returning his attention to where Kurapika was suspended by his twisted arms, “I have a few more questions for you.”

Kurapika groaned in pain, “You’re just going to kill me once you’ve found your answer.”

Chrollo nodded, “That’s right. But I’ll make it quick and easy if you comply.”

Kurapika spat onto the floor by his feet, “You call this quick and easy?”

Chrollo turned on the soldering iron in his hand, “Compared to what I’m going to do if you resist? Yes, this is quick and easy.”

Kurapika’s breath trembled a bit, “What are you going to do?”

 

** {REDACTED SCENE} **

Contains burning, chemical/acid burns

 

 

Chrollo stood directly in front of him, carefully setting the hot iron down before he began working the belt off of Kurapika’s waist. Kurapika felt his lip quiver, Chrollo had touched him before, but this was so very different.

Chrollo stripped him the rest of the way, picking the iron back up, “First, I’m going to leave you with my mark. But it’s what I plan to do if you continue to resist that’s truly frightening.”

Kurapika ignored him, bleakly awaiting the burns that would surely be inflicted on him.

Chrollo spoke first, “Tell me, what are the Spider’s doing about the mole?”

Kurapika was in a clearer headspace now, and he knew something was very wrong, “I don’t know. They don’t tell me anything unnecessary.”

Chrollo brought the iron close to his skin, close enough that the heat ghosted over his skin, “You know more than that.”

Kurapika looked at him as closely as he could, even though things were definitely wrong, he couldn’t figure it out, “I don’t know anything more.”

Chrollo pressed the iron to his skin, making him screech in pain. He dragged the iron slowly, sketching out a shape on his body. He took his time branding four more areas on Kurapika’s upper back.

He drew back when Kurapika seemed on the verge of breaking, “Tell me everything you know about the Spider’s.”

Kurapika keened, an eerie sound rising from his chest, “I don’t know anything about them. They’re from Meteor City, that’s all I know.”

Chrollo branded him again, leaving him only when his whole head spun so viciously from the anguish and misery that he couldn’t respond. Chrollo lifted his head, wiping a trail of spit and tears that ran down his face before speaking, “If you can’t answer me, just nod or shake your head.”

Kurapika managed a feeble nod, so he went on, “Good. This is your last chance, tell me **_everything_** you know, or the hell you’re in right now will be only the beginning.”

Kurapika nodded slowly, his head feeling light from pain so that he couldn’t think. Chrollo gave him a moment, but when he spoke, all he could do was garble his words.

Chrollo squeezed his face tighter, “Last chance. Tell me what you know.”

Kurapika didn’t know what came over him, but he found himself staring back in silent protest. Chrollo brought their faces close together so that Kurapika could smell that awful stench that made his nose wrinkle in disgust.

He drew away without another word, fumbling through whatever he’d brought until he picked up a familiar kind of glass bottle that made Kurapika feel sick. Chrollo took hold of the chain and latched it to something overhead, forcing Kurapika’s head back.

Kurapika nearly threw up, but he couldn’t from this angle, “Please… don’t do that. Anything but that. I’ll talk, I swear I’ll tell you anything.”

Chrollo snorted, “Did you suddenly find your voice? That’s too bad, you don’t know anything else, which means I get to have my fun with you, and I don’t need you talking for that.”

Kurapika wanted to lose consciousness, but he was awake as Chrollo forced his mouth open before pouring the liquid into his mouth. Kurapika knew what the incredibly sour taste meant instantly as he choked and tried to spit the acid out of his mouth. Chrollo allowed him to vomit it onto the floor, but a moment later, he repeated the process. He did so until Kurapika couldn’t speak any words at all, then poured a jug of water down his mouth and throat, also allowing it to pour into his sinuses. Kurapika threw his head forward, feeling like he was drowning and choking. Chrollo allowed his head to hang, and Kurapika could feel the blood pouring from the burns in his mouth, throat, and nose.

Chrollo left him to try and recover some before he picked something else, his voice betraying a new level of sadism, “Do you know what white phosphorous is? It’s a volatile chemical that ignites when exposed to oxygen. You know, most people think a third-degree burn is the worst kind of burn. But that’s wrong, burns actually go to the fourth degree. White phosphorus does that, burns through both layers of skin and underlying tissue. It’s actually a bit fortunate for you, when a burn is that severe, you lose all feeling as the nerves are completely incinerated.”

Kurapika felt hot tears streaming down his face, but he couldn’t even plead for him to stop anymore. Chrollo smiled at him, looking disgustingly amused, “Those burns in your mouth from the acid? Well, those are painful sure, but probably only third-degree burns at worst. Acid is slow. Satisfying to use, but slow.”

Kurapika sobbed, feeling sick again, as Chrollo carefully dressed in gloves and a mask to protect himself as he fished out the hazardous substance before tracing a large pattern over Kurapika’s torso with something cold that felt like gel. Kurapika felt so cold, so very cold as Chrollo ignited the gel with the white phosphorus.

 

Perhaps it was good, but Kurapika shut out what was happening completely. Maybe he lost consciousness, or maybe his mind knew that there was no possible way to process that kind of pain.

 

** {REDACTED SCENE END} **

When he did wake, he was chained to the floor again, and the terrible odor told him that he’d either vomited repeatedly, or white phosphorus held a truly stomach-churning stench.

He couldn’t do anything, all he knew was pain as Chrollo returned, yanking him off the floor and forcing him to drink water. Kurapika’s head lulled back helplessly as he was hauled to his feet again.

Chrollo spat on him, “You’re a mess. Disgusting.”

 

** {REDACTED SCENE} **

Contains vague sexual assault

 

 

It was all Kurapika could do to keep breathing as Chrollo ran his hands over his sides in a very pointed manner. Kurapika cried easily now, finding no reason to deny himself the tears that ran from his scarlet eyes, down his face and dropping onto the floor by his feet. Chrollo pressed close to him, running his tongue over Kurapika’s cheek and making the blonde gag at the reek of his breath.

Chrollo spat on him again, “I love it when you cry. Those eyes are truly a wonder of the world.”

He admired the grimace on Kurapika’s face for a moment before affording him the courtesy of wiping his spit off his face. He pressed his face into Kurapika’s neck, biting roughly and making Kurapika whine in pain as blood was drawn.

Chrollo’s hands worked lower, and Kurapika could do little more than allow his head to drop onto Chrollo’s shoulder as he cried, willing him to stop but knowing he could say and do nothing.

He choked on the hot, disgusting smell that permeated from Chrollo, nothing like the crisp, fresh aftershave he’d come to associate with Chrollo’s scent.

 

And Kurapika finally realized, it was **_nothing_** like Chrollo’s scent. Not his cologne, or aftershave, or natural scent. Even his sweat had a mildness to it, the times Kurapika had been in close proximity to him when he was sweaty, he’d noticed it was a subtle, tangy smell.

 

This new odor was heavy, thick and acrid. It turned his stomach and made him want to retch, even without the violations being forced on his body at the moment. Slowly, but surely, the pieces began falling together in Kurapika’s mind as Chrollo gripped him, savagely forcing himself onto him and sending excruciating pain through his body. Tears poured down his face, but he was grateful for anything, **_anything,_** that took him away from what was happening to him. A memory of something Chrollo once said to him played over and over again, ‘ _I’m not going to force myself on you. I do have limits, you know.’_

Teeth sunk into his shoulder, piercing the skin and making him cry out hoarsely through his burned throat.

Kurapika gathered all his strength, all his willpower and fight left in him, and spoke while the man behind him assaulted him cruelly and barbarously, “Thinner… than water.”

For a moment, a brief moment, the man stopped hurting him, “What?”

Kurapika had to take a breather between pain and dizziness, his voice painful and rough, “Do you- know what that means?”

The man huffed in annoyance, “What are you blabbering about? Are you talking about that saying, ‘blood is thicker than water’?”

Something indescribable passed through Kurapika, and he laughed despite the continuous torture being thrust onto him. The man he knew would never mess that phrase up, it was everything to him.

 

**_This wasn’t Chrollo. And that meant there was hope._ **

****

…

 

Kurapika had shut down for most of the assault, he was allowing himself to vividly imagine and daydream about his childhood. He was running through the forest with Pairo, it was golden hour, and the sun had been gleaming through the trees as they raced to their favorite spot, together.

It was a fond memory, a happy one.

 

** {REDACTED SCENE END} **

 

He was jolted back to reality by a sudden, loud boom from upstairs. The man stopped immediately, his eyes widening in surprise, and for a brief moment, he let his voice slip from his imitation of Chrollo, back to his real voice, “Nobody should be here…”

Kurapika could hardly process anything as he was thrown hard to the floor, the collar slicing at his neck as the sharp prongs bit the flesh. Kurapika let out a grunt of pain, battered and filthy, as the man abandoned his abuse to go investigate. Kurapika just watched him go, gasping for air through the pain that triggered every nerve in his body. He wanted to feel ashamed, to feel vulnerable in his position, but he couldn’t. All he could do was try to keep breathing.

 

He didn’t know how long he’d been lying there, just trying to breathe, when footsteps sounded somewhere just beyond the door. The door opened cautiously, and Kurapika recognized the person standing there. Long black coat, cross tattoo, soft, fluffy black hair hanging loosely like he’d been wearing it in the months Kurapika had known him.

He crossed the room quickly, dropping down next to Kurapika, who could feel the alarm pulsing off of him. The man looked him over, a terrible, frightened look in his eyes as he did.

Kurapika drew a few deep breaths, “I need… to hear you say something.”

The man drew closer, searching his eyes, “Kurapika… anything.”

Kurapika trembled a bit, still struggling to keep his breath, “Thinner than water. Say it…”

Dark eyes gazed deeply into his, shaking his head slightly in confusion, “Thinner than water, but thicker than blood. What about it?”

Kurapika was filled with something like relief, but so much more intense. It was really Chrollo.

He let himself cry, not caring about shame or humiliation as Chrollo quickly began untying his ankles. Chrollo powerfully snapped the wooden rack that was twisting his arms. He pulled out his knife, cutting Kurapika’s wrists free before delicately replacing his shoulders.

Chrollo sat him up gently, but Kurapika was too weak to hold his head up on his own. A hand gently held his head up, Chrollo carefully examining his mouth.

Kurapika winced as a finger brushed his burned lips, “Kurapika… what happened? What did they do to you?”

He was out of strength, and beginning to lose consciousness as he simply gazed back at Chrollo.

Chrollo nodded slightly, pulling his coat off and wrapping Kurapika in it.

He cooed softly as Kurapika whimpered in pain at being picked up, “It’s okay. I’m going to get you somewhere safe okay?”

Kurapika’s throat hurt too much to reply, so he just allowed his head to rest against Chrollo’s chest. He drew a huge breath of that wonderful, crisp cologne. He could feel his consciousness slipping, and in Chrollo’s steady, gentle hold, he allowed himself to sink into the darkness.

 

…

 

Chrollo carefully set Kurapika into the reclined front seat of a black Maserati Ghibli, disappearing for a moment before returning with a blanket and swaddling Kurapika in it.

Kurapika was dazed and confused for most of the ride. His chest and abdomen were screaming in pain, and God was he thirsty. He was aware of street lights passing overhead, and he thought a long time had passed.

 

Eventually, Chrollo pulled up to a large, luxury house on a hillside. He eased Kurapika carefully into a sitting position, making the blonde wince in pain.

Chrollo steadied him, “Can you walk?”

Kurapika couldn’t speak, his mouth dry, burned and in too much pain to form words, so he just slumped into Chrollo’s hold and shook his head.

Chrollo nodded, “Okay.”

He eased Kurapika up, slipping an arm beneath his legs and carrying him up the steps to the door. Once inside, he carefully laid Kurapika on the carpeted floor. Chrollo laid a stack of blankets and towels on the floor, lifting and setting him on them.

He leaned over Kurapika, who was squinting due to his light sensitivity, “I’m gonna take these off, okay? I’m sorry, but I need to see how badly you’re hurt.”

Kurapika just gazed up at him, his mouth so painfully dry. Chrollo’s eyes lit with understanding as he found a water bottle, carefully parting Kurapika’s lips and helping him drink. He laid him back down when the water bottle was empty, frowning sadly at the condition Kurapika was in before gently undressing him.

Now removed from the incident by some time, Kurapika burned in shame as he was bared again. Chrollo soothed him, freezing and making a face as he looked over the phosphorus burns, his eyes looking quickly away as he noted the smeared blood on his legs.

His hands were trembling as he stroked Kurapika’s cheek, wiping away tears as he stared into those scarlet eyes, “What did they do to you? My poor Kurapika…”

Kurapika whimpered at the caress, more tears falling. Chrollo’s eyes glittered as though he wanted to cry too, “I’m going to do something. It’s going to take some time, but I’m going to help you.”

Kurapika just closed his eyes as Chrollo hovered his left hand over the burns on his chest and conjured his Bandit’s Secret book. A familiar, soothing, god-sent warmth passed through Kurapika, and he realized with a jolt that Chrollo was using Lifeline Transposition on him.

He was startled, part of him didn’t want Chrollo to heal him if it meant he would know exactly what had happened to him, “Don’t!”

Chrollo hushed him, “Shh. Just relax. You’ve been through enough. Just sleep, okay? I’ll take care of you. I’ll keep you safe.”

Kurapika’s body numbed with the anesthetic properties of Chrollo’s nen, but he felt tears continuing to fall as he was finally able to speak, “What if-”

Chrollo hummed softly, looking sharply focused on his work as he spoke, “’What if’ what?”

Kurapika whimpered, “What if you’re not here when I wake up?”

Chrollo hushed him again, “Shh… I’ll be here. I swear. I won’t leave your side, not even once. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Kurapika whined, but he was succumbing to the sweet, comfortable numbness. He stole one last look at Chrollo, who spared him a faint, empty smile before Kurapika felt his eyes finally slip closed as he fell unconscious beneath Chrollo’s healing hand.


	17. Cleanse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for; (Mild) mention of weight loss
> 
> Sorry for the long update periods, I'm getting close to the end of the semester which means finals are right around the corner and taking a lot of my time! I had to split this chapter in half due to its length, but the next chapter has some LeoPika and KuroShal undertones!

 

 

Kurapika faded in and out of consciousness as he lay on the floor. Chrollo had taken the physical injuries away, but emotional turmoil still plagued Kurapika, and his body was exhausted.

He opened his eyes, still too exhausted to get up. He gazed vacantly at Chrollo who was lying next to him, clearly wrought with the pain from his nen. Chrollo meekly opened his eyes, meeting Kurapika’s for a brief moment before Kurapika reached out and took his hand. Chrollo let out a strained sigh, closing his eyes again and braving the hot agony of Lifeline Transposition while Kurapika let himself slip unconscious again.

 

The first few days were spent focused on nothing but physically recovering. Chrollo was enduring the pain and fevers that came in the wake of healing Kurapika, and though he no longer had any visible injuries, Kurapika had been held for over a week without food and with very little water, and his body needed rest.

By the fifth day, Chrollo had largely recovered, and Kurapika was beginning to feel the aftermath of his captivity. He felt numbed, not experiencing any kind of emotion beyond the twinge of concern caused by Chrollo’s suffering on his behalf. Instead he just felt tired. So tired that all he cared to do was sleep, seldom eating and neglecting to do anything else. Chrollo had become visibly worried about him by the end of the first week.

 

…

 

Kurapika was lying on his side, finding it difficult to get comfortable. Chrollo had been back on his feet for a few days now and spent most of his time pestering Kurapika and trying to get him to eat.

Right now proved to be no different as Chrollo was busy trying to coax Kurapika out of bed by proposing a variety of things they could eat for dinner, but it was all in vain.

Kurapika sighed, all he wanted to do was sleep, he didn’t even feel hungry, “I don’t really want anything.”

They’d been doing this back-and-forth game for days, and Kurapika knew how it’d play out, “You need to eat something. I’ll get you anything you want, just tell me.”

Kurapika sighed again, feeling annoyed rather than flattered, “I don’t want anything. At all. I’m not hungry.”

Chrollo was persistent, “Kurapika, you have to eat. Come on, I’ll make you soup or something light, but you have to eat.”

Kurapika glared up at the man who was gazing down at him with eyes full of concern, “I didn’t know you were deaf. Pardon me.”

Chrollo made a face, “Don’t be like that. What about a bagel? Or toast?”

Kurapika grimaced before burying his face under the blankets, “You don’t know when to quit, do you?”

Chrollo placed a hand on Kurapika’s shoulder, but Kurapika shrugged him off, oddly uncomfortable at the gesture, “You’ve lost so much weight, can’t you just try to eat? You don’t even have to get up, I’ll bring it to you. I just want you to eat.”

Kurapika felt a flash of anger burn through him, “God, will you just leave me alone? Is that so hard for you?”

He immediately regretted snapping at Chrollo when he felt the other withdraw with a quiet sigh, “I’m sorry. I’ll let you rest. Let me know if you need anything.”

Kurapika wanted to apologize, to tell him to come back and that he didn’t mean to be so snappy, that he knew Chrollo was only trying to look out for him. But the words never came. Kurapika had found that since his ordeal, he either felt angry or nothing at all, and he’d been lashing out at Chrollo the entire time. He had yet to apologize for even one of his outbursts.

A sorrow gripped him for a moment, guilt over how awful he’d been treating Chrollo made him ache. He didn’t know why he was acting this way, he didn’t want to, but he couldn’t stop it. Kurapika quickly descended into anger and frustration, it wasn’t fair. He didn’t understand it, he couldn’t control it, it just took over and he didn’t know _why._

Chrollo had left him, so he just boiled in his own fury. Kurapika clutched the blankets as hard as he could, rage mounting inside of him as his frustrations built. He felt like he wanted to kill something, and there was no outlet for his wrath, so he just buried his face deep into his pillow and cried. He hated crying, but he just couldn’t think of anything else to do than stifle his sobs with the pillow and hope Chrollo didn’t come back any time soon to see him like this.

 

…

 

Sometime later in the evening, Chrollo returned. Kurapika had long since cried himself out, but his eyes were dreadfully swollen and they stung when Chrollo turned the lights on.

Kurapika turned away, trying to hide his eyes, “What do you want?”

Chrollo sat gently at the edge of the bed, the smell of soup wafting to Kurapika, “I brought you something.”

Kurapika didn’t look up, “I’m not hungry.”

Kurapika heard him set down the bowl, gently stroking him with a still warm hand, “You haven’t eaten since two days ago.”

Kurapika heaved an irritated sigh, “Wow, I wouldn’t have known that if you didn’t remind me. I’m not hungry.”

Chrollo didn’t reply instantly, but he kept his hand on Kurapika, “You can’t keep doing this to yourself. Just try to eat. Pick out what you like and leave what you don’t, just drink the broth, take a couple bites, just please eat something.”

A hostile growl rose in Kurapika, “Don’t tell me what to do. And don’t talk to me like you know what’s best for me. And don’t you dare start with that pity shit.”

Chrollo sighed, “I’m not pitying you. I know you hate that I just-”

Kurapika felt a hot flash of anger, “You don’t know anything about me! Stop acting like you know what’s best for me, it’s sickening. Just leave me alone and get away from me.”

Chrollo fell silent while Kurapika fought back more tears. A hand caressed him gently, “I’m not going to do that. You can take all that anger, all that hatred and rage, you can take that out on me. But you won’t drive me away.”

Kurapika felt like his heart was breaking, but he didn’t know why, and it only made him angrier, “Just leave me alone. Leave me alone and get away from me. I don’t want food and I don’t want you here. I want to be alone.”

Chrollo stroked him again, “I’ll give you your space, but I’m not going to abandon you, no matter how many times you try to take my head off with your words.”

Kurapika’s lip quivered, he was furious and distraught all at once, “Leave me alone.”

Chrollo coaxed him up, “Take a couple of bites, just a couple, and I’ll leave you to rest. But I won’t leave a moment sooner.”

Kurapika glared at him as he was hauled into a sitting position against his will, “Will you just drop it?”

Chrollo picked up the soup bowl, taking a testy sip and checking the temperature, “If I did that, the bowl would break.”

Kurapika glared hard and without an ounce of amusement. Chrollo’s smile ran away from his face, but he kept the bowl in hand, gesturing to Kurapika, “Here. Just a couple bites.”

Kurapika glared for a long moment, “I take a couple bites and you leave me alone?”

Chrollo nodded, “They have to be real bites, but yes.”

Kurapika still felt furious, half of him wanting to dump the bowl on Chrollo. But he took the soup and forced himself to down two, large spoonsful.

It made him feel sick, so he handed the bowl back to Chrollo as his stomach twisted, “That’s enough. I don’t want any more.”

Chrollo looked reticent as he took it back, but the long look he gave Kurapika seemed to help him understand, “That’s okay. At least it’s something.”

When Kurapika’s head was still hanging after a long while with no response, Chrollo stroked his back caringly, “Do you need me to get you something?”

Kurapika felt his stomach leap suddenly, nodding to Chrollo, “Help me get to the bathroom, please.”

Kurapika cupped a hand over his mouth, trying to force his nausea down long enough to reach a sink or toilet. Chrollo propped him up, helping guide him as he stumbled forth towards the bathroom. Kurapika barely made it, throwing himself the last few steps before collapsing and vomiting.

Chrollo soothed him, holding his now overgrown hair back while he rubbed his back. Kurapika wretched violently, whatever he’d eaten definitely wasn’t staying down. The convulsions were violent, and they lasted for what felt like forever. Kurapika had long since run out of things to throw up when he finally leaned back, looking miserable.

Chrollo grabbed a small paper cup off the bathroom counter and filled it with water before handing it to Kurapika, who just watched him blankly with rheumy eyes, “Here, rinse your mouth with this.”

Kurapika swished the water around for a moment before spitting it out. Chrollo helped him to his feet and supported him as he stumbled back to the bed. He curled up, feeling wretched and cold. Soothing strokes massaged his arms and hair as Chrollo sat with him.

Chrollo patted him gently, “I’ll let you get some rest okay. Let me know if you need anything.”

Kurapika felt distressed as Chrollo’s warmth left him, and he momentarily fought between the desire to call out to him and his own frustrations that made him want to stay silent and seethe.

Eventually, he broke, “Chrollo?”

Chrollo stopped at the door, “Do you need something?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, his throat feeling tight with emotion, “Can you… stay with me? I know I don’t have the right to ask but-”

Chrollo returned and placed a soft kiss against his shoulder, “Of course I’ll stay.”

Kurapika felt warmed and saddened, guilt swallowing him, “I’m… I’m sorry.”

Chrollo curled up next to him, but left him a respectful amount of space, “You’ve nothing to be sorry for.”

Kurapika felt hot tears run down his face, and was grateful he was facing away from Chrollo as the other man turned the lights off, “I keep pushing you away. I keep lashing out at you and I don’t want to and I don’t know why and I just want it to stop.”

Kurapika could hear his voice straining, but Chrollo didn’t push it as he cuddled up to Kurapika in a mindful manner, “You know I’m not holding anything against you, right? Anyone who’s been through what you went through would be feeling this way. It’s normal to lash out and be angry, don’t be so hard on yourself.”

Kurapika didn’t answer him, instead he found himself unsettled by the darkness. He felt pathetic asking, but he could feel his skin crawling and his heart racing, “Chrollo?”

Chrollo hummed, “Yes?”

Kurapika took a moment, he couldn’t believe he was asking this, but the memory of the terribly dark room was beginning to haunt him, “Can you leave a light on?”

If it were anyone else, Kurapika was certain he’d have been laughed at, but Chrollo made no scene about it as he turned a lamp up half way, “Sure. Is that too bright? Or too dim?”

Kurapika sighed, the room wasn’t bright, but he could see from one end to the other, “That’s perfect, thank you.”

Chrollo gave him a quiet hum before settling back down beside him. He was close enough that his body warmed Kurapika, but he was careful not to smother him. Kurapika was deeply appreciative of the gesture, and he let himself relax into a shallow rest.

 

He woke in the middle of the night, grateful that the room was light when he opened his eyes. For a moment he lay still, unsure of what woke him until he felt compelled to get up and go to the bathroom. Chrollo was snoring comfortably next to him, and he didn’t want to wake him to ask for help. Instead, he carefully got to his feet, feeling dizzy and weak-legged. He drew a deep breath, quelling his nausea long enough to hobble to the bathroom, leaving the door ajar.

Kurapika braced himself over the sink, his head was swimming and his whole body felt weak. He wretched once, but he had nothing to throw up.

Groaning, he looked at himself in the mirror. He was disgusted by himself; his hair was dull, filthy and matted, his eyes were blackened and sunken, his skin was ghostly pale, and his bones stuck out dramatically on his frighteningly thin frame. He gazed down at his hands, noting the overgrown and filthy nails. Shaking his head lightly, Kurapika berated himself for his condition.

He was so focused on degrading himself that he was startled out of his skin when Chrollo burst through the door, “Kurapika?”

Kurapika caught his breath, feeling faint from the start, “What’s wrong with you? Don’t scare me like that!”

Chrollo was gazing wide-eyed at him, “Are you okay?”

Kurapika leaned on the sink again, “I was fine until you came busting the door down like some kind of mad man!”

Chrollo was still watching him with concern, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. It’s just… I noticed you weren’t there when I woke up, and I noticed the light and thought…”

He trailed off, casting a long glance towards the medicine cabinet. Kurapika followed his gaze, opening the cabinet and pulling out a bottle of Dilaudid.

His eyes widened as he turned his gaze back to Chrollo, “Did you think… Did you think I was going to…?”

Chrollo swallowed hard, looking guilty, “I was just worried. You’ve been so withdrawn, I didn’t want to take any chances, but I’m sorry I startled you.”

Kurapika was almost offended, so he distracted himself, “What do you even have Dilaudid for anyway?”

Chrollo looked down at the bottle, “I took it for a while after I fought Silva the first time and was dealing with some lingering injuries. I regret that decision though.”

Kurapika replaced the bottle in the cabinet, closing the small door, “Why?”

He knew it was a stupid question, but Chrollo answered anyway, “I had the worst time of my life when I went through withdrawals after I stopped taking it. We were out on a heist on I couldn’t even keep my head straight. I was borderline delusional and in more pain than before I took those damn pills in the first place.”

Kurapika gazed at him for a moment, “I’m sorry about that. It must’ve been hard.”

Chrollo shrugged, a bit too easily, “It was a mistake, and one I don’t plan on repeating.”

Kurapika slumped against the counter, “Anyway, that wasn’t my plan. At all. I came in here to throw up. So, you don’t need to worry.”

Chrollo nodded with a sigh, “Yeah, sorry about scaring you again.”

Kurapika nodded a bit, taking a seat on the edge of the bath, “It’s all right.”

Chrollo sat next to him, “How are you feeling?”

Kurapika groaned a bit, “Miserable. Disgusting.”

Chrollo furrowed his brows, “Disgusting?”

Kurapika mulled, “Look at me, I’m filthy. I can’t stand it, it makes me feel sick to be in my own skin.”

Chrollo frowned a bit, “You’re suffering. You should cut yourself some slack.”

Kurapika looked away, “I hate it. It makes me want to rip my skin off just to be rid of it.”

Chrollo gave him a soft look, “I think maybe it’s more than just dirt that’s upsetting you.”

Kurapika glared at him, “Don’t start. It doesn’t have to be some deep meaning. I’m sick of being filthy.”

Chrollo looked unconvinced, but he dropped it, “We can fix that pretty easily though. Come on, I’ll draw you a bath while you shower.”

Kurapika eyed him, “It’s the middle of the night.”

Chrollo shrugged with an easy smile, “So? We’ll just sleep in. I’ll get you a clean pair of pajamas too. They’ll be a little too big but I think that just makes them more comfortable.”

Kurapika gave him a befuddled look, “Are you serious?”

Chrollo nodded, “Yeah, if you want. You’ll probably sleep better after a nice wash and soak.”

Kurapika hadn’t caught himself before he asked, “Can you help me? I’m a little shaky on my feet.”

Chrollo didn’t make a big deal of it though Kurapika burned in embarrassment, “Sure. I’ll be right back, I’m gonna grab your change of clothes.” Kurapika watched him go, pausing for a moment to turn the shower on for Kurapika.

 

Chrollo returned with a pair of fleece pajamas as Kurapika let the water wash over his hand, repulsed by the grime that was dispersed as the warm water melted it away. He was acutely away of Chrollo as he started to lift his shirt.

Chrollo seemed to take note because he purposefully turned away while Kurapika undressed and slipped into the shower. He had to hold onto the railing to keep from feeling like he’d faint from the heat.

Chrollo let him be for a while before speaking up from where he was lounging on the counter and reading, “Does the shower feel nice?”

Kurapika sighed into the warmth, “Yeah, it does.”

He could hear the smile in Chrollo’s voice, “That’s good, I’m glad. Do you want me to wash your back for you?”

For a moment, Kurapika was suspicious, but he conceded, “Would you please?”

Chrollo hopped off the counter and set his book down before coming to stand by the shower. Kurapika rather shyly pulled the curtain aside and sat on the edge of the bath, keeping his head tucked away to hide his face.

Chrollo was gentle as he took hold of a loofa and scrubbed Kurapika’s back. A wave of shame and self-consciousness hit him as he sat there, suddenly regretting accepting Chrollo’s help.

He knew he had grown tense, because Chrollo spoke softly to him, “You okay?”

Kurapika stared at where his hands were cupped in his lap, “I just feel like hell.”

Chrollo rubbed his shoulders in comfortable motions, “What’s the matter? Talk to me.”

Kurapika sighed, “I feel- I don’t know. Dirty. It’s embarrassing.”

Chrollo placed a delicate, sweet kiss to the back of his shoulder, “You’ve nothing to feel embarrassed about. You’ve been through hell, you deserve a break. So don’t be so hard on yourself okay?”

Kurapika grunted, the words were sweet and genuine, but he was still feeling wretched, “It’s not an excuse.”

Chrollo rubbed the back of his neck tenderly, “What do you mean?”

Kurapika wasn’t sure he wanted to continue talking, but his mouth moved on its own, “It’s not an excuse to sit and wallow in my own filth and self-pity.”

Chrollo murmured a bit sadly, “Be nice to yourself. You deserve a break, you really do. Besides,” he kissed him sweetly again, “A little dirt isn’t a big deal, right?”

Kurapika shivered, a chill gripping him now that he wasn’t under the stream of the shower, “Maybe not to you.”

Chrollo sighed softly, “Well, you’ve been through enough. I’m not going to tell you how to feel, just that I love you and I don’t think you’ve got anything to feel badly about.”

Kurapika shivered more violently, ignoring Chrollo’s words for lack of anything more to say.

Chrollo massaged his tense, trembling shoulders, “Hey, why don’t I draw a bath for you? You can soak for a while.”

Kurapika nodded a bit, “All right, that sounds nice.”

Chrollo stood up, letting Kurapika wash off the remaining soap while he ran the water. When he finished, he stood a bit awkwardly behind the shower curtain, waiting for the bath to finish filling.

He let out a small huff, “You know, you’re wasting a lot of water.”

Chrollo smiled a bit, dumping something into the water, “It’s not a waste if it makes you comfortable.”

Kurapika watched him for a moment, curious about the slightly purple tinted fluid, “What’s that?”

Chrollo glanced up at him, “Lavender milk bath and Epsom salt. It’s soothing on the skin and muscles and lavender is supposed to help you sleep.”

Kurapika hummed, still shivering as he watched the now lilac-colored bath bubble a bit, “Sounds nice.”

Chrollo turned the faucet off, smiling at him, “I’m sure it will be once you get in.”

Noting Kurapika’s reluctance, he dried his hands before picking his book back up and turning away to let Kurapika slip from the shower to the large, circular bath. He let himself sink into the sweet-smelling water with a hefty sigh. Heat seeped into his tense muscles, at first, his skin stung in response to the salts in the bath, but after a moment, his whole body felt comfortably numbed and warmed.

Chrollo sat on the edge of the bath, book in hand, “Does it feel nice?”

Kurapika closed his eyes, sinking lower into the bubbles with a hum, “It does. Thank you.”

Chrollo smiled kindly at him, “I’m glad.”

Kurapika relaxed for a while as Chrollo stroked his hair fondly. He withdrew his hand with a saddened look, “You’re pulling your hair.”

Kurapika gave him a look, “Is there a question in there?”

Chrollo brushed the hair off his hand, “There is, but it’s a stupid one. Why?”

Kurapika grumbled, “Yeah that’s a stupid one all right. My hair’s matted and it itches and the more I scratch it the more falls out.”

Chrollo sighed a bit, “Is that really the reason?”

Kurapika closed his eyes again, “Yes. It is.”

He could feel Chrollo make a doubtful face, but he went on anyway, “All right, then come here and lean over the bath.”

Kurapika gave him a baffled look as he stood up, set his book on the counter, and started fishing through a drawer, “What are you on about now?”

Chrollo chuckled, “I’m gonna help you while you relax.”

Kurapika eyed him, but pressed his back to the edge of the bath anyway, “What are you up to?”

Chrollo set some things down before laying out a spare towel and pulling a stool up to the bath, “I’m gonna give you a haircut.”

Kurapika pulled away instantly, “Uh uh, no way. You are not cutting my hair.”

Chrollo laughed, “Come on, I’m not gonna do anything crazy like give you an undercut or something. I’m just gonna trim it back for you so it isn’t so itchy.”

Kurapika stayed where he was, “Have you ever cut someone’s hair before?”

Chrollo thought for a moment, “I’ve buzzed hair before, does that count?”

Kurapika rolled his eyes but sat back again, “No, it doesn’t.”

Chrollo took up a comb and began to gently brush out Kurapika’s tangled hair, “I’ll be careful, I promise.”

Kurapika just grunted agreement as he leaned his head back and relaxed, “If I end up looking like one of those ‘worlds ugliest dogs’, I will absolutely kill you in your sleep.”

Chrollo chuckled happily, placing a loving kiss to the top of his head, “If I screw up that badly, you have my permission to do so. But come on, have a little faith.”

Kurapika just closed his eyes again and let Chrollo continue combing and trimming. He was certain he’d end up looking like hell, but he figured it couldn’t be any worse than it was right now with his hair terribly matted and falling out by the handful.

Chrollo worked for quite some time, quietly, calmly, and with apparent confidence. Kurapika felt him massage his scalp, smoothing some good-smelling oil into his hair as he did so.

He gave him a soft kiss, “I’m finished, and it doesn’t look half bad.”

Kurapika scoffed, “Doesn’t look _half_ bad huh?”

Chrollo hummed, “It looks fine. Shorter than it was, but even, and it’s not a buzz cut so I think that’s pretty good.”

Kurapika tipped his head back to look at him, startled by their sudden closeness, “If you move, I’ll take a look and decide for myself.”

Chrollo gave him a soft smile as he stood up, “Sure thing.”

Kurapika waited for him to turn away before hoisting himself out of the now lukewarm bathwater, grabbing a towel and wrapping it promptly around his waist before he came to stand before the mirror. He was startled by the prominence of his ribs and hips, Chrollo was right, he’d lost a lot of weight. He swallowed hard, feeling a genuine concern for himself for the first time since he’d been found by Chrollo.

In an effort to distract himself, he began assessing Chrollo’s handiwork, and he had to admit it was a pretty decent job. His hair was still fairly wet, but it was clean, sweet smelling, and evenly trimmed, and the itchiness had gone away. He ran his fingers through it, feeling a bit better when his hair glided smoothly and without any tangles.

Chrollo came to stand next to him, brushing his hand gently over Kurapika’s shoulder, though Kurapika shrugged him off, feeling embarrassed by the condition he was in.

Chrollo tipped his head a bit curiously, but he didn’t pressure Kurapika for an explanation, “See? I told you it wasn’t bad.”

Kurapika looked at him with a light sigh, “Yeah, you did a pretty good job.”

Chrollo smiled faintly, picking up the pajamas he’d brought, “Here. I’ll let you get dressed and, in the meantime, I’m gonna get you something to eat.”

Kurapika groaned, “It’s just gonna make me sick again.”

Chrollo gave him a steady look, “You need to eat. I’ll get you something mild okay?”

Kurapika sighed, taking another shameful, hard look at himself in the mirror. He knew Chrollo was right, he was going to die if he kept doing this to himself, “All right. How about some toast with jelly or something like that?”

Chrollo smiled, closing his eyes in contentment, “Sounds perfect. Have a flavor preference?”

Kurapika shook his head, “Not really, no. Whatever you have opened already works fine.”

Chrollo nodded, gazing at him for a moment before leaning in and kissing him affectionately on the cheek, “I’ll get that for you and wait for you in the room, okay?”

For a moment, Kurapika wanted to return his kiss, but he still wasn’t feeling up to it, “All right. Thank you.”

When he’d left, Kurapika redressed in the soft pajamas before fishing through the drawers and finding a nail clipper.

He winced as he clipped one of his now clean, but still overgrown, nails, _I’m not going to just lay around and waste away. I **refuse** to just lay around and waste away._

He felt a surge of anger and shame in himself for having let his condition get so bad, but this time, the anger fell way to a burst of energy and determination as he continued clipping his nails before going to try and eat something.

 

…

 

Kurapika had only made it about halfway through the toast, and though Chrollo had asked him if he was sure he didn’t want anymore, he didn’t hassle him when Kurapika had insisted that he’d had enough.

Now they lounged quietly together, Chrollo was reclined and reading while Kurapika was lying on his side facing away from Chrollo while he dozed.

He didn’t know where it came from, but Kurapika was jolted awake with a sudden, terrible sadness. He turned to gaze over at Chrollo, who was absorbed in his reading. Kurapika couldn’t explain it, but he suddenly felt so alone, so isolated. Chrollo was right next to him, but it felt like he was worlds away.

Kurapika stayed still for a moment, an internal battle being fought over whether to roll back over and accept his lonesomeness, or to speak up and get Chrollo’s attention.

He was about to give in to his despair when a voice somewhere inside his head berated him, _I’m tired of this._

Without thinking, he pulled himself up and dropped his head on Chrollo’s chest. Chrollo looked a bit surprised for a moment, but he stroked his hair with a soft smile, “Something wrong?”

Kurapika sighed, a deep relief calming him, “Nothing’s wrong.”

Chrollo hummed, the sound delightfully close in Kurapika’s ear as he lay there, “All right. Let me know if you need anything.”

Kurapika blinked slowly, feeling tired but restless, “There is something, but it’s stupid and embarrassing.”

Chrollo continued scratching his head gently, an incredibly pleasant sensation, “You can still ask, I won’t judge you.”

Kurapika let him continue the petting for a moment longer before he spoke, “What are you reading?”

He felt Chrollo’s knowing smile, “A collection of stories published in a book together. You ever heard of Harlan Ellison?”

Kurapika smiled, “I have no mouth, and I must scream.”

Chrollo patted him, “That’s the guy,” very knowingly, he added, “Why don’t I read to you for a bit? It might help you sleep.”

Kurapika burned with a blush, but he was grateful Chrollo hadn’t waited and made him ask instead, “That sounds really nice, I’d like that.”

With a warmhearted kiss to the top of his head, Chrollo turned to the beginning of a story and started reading. Kurapika was instantly soothed by that deep, silky voice, and before he even knew what the story was about, he’d fallen asleep in Chrollo’s arms, feeling clean, comfortable, and hopeful for the first time in weeks.


	18. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These last couple of chapters have been very transitional, but the next chapter should start to pick up the pace again!

 

 

Kurapika woke to a bright room, comfortably sunken into Chrollo’s chest. For a moment he just lay there, not feeling angry or upset as he let his head rest and listened to the rhythmic pulse of Chrollo’s heart. He squeezed Chrollo’s side a bit tighter, a bit closer, and he felt a hand run up his back with kind, loving motions. A smile quirked Kurapika’s lips as Chrollo stroked his hair fondly.

For a while they just stayed like that, Kurapika relishing the company, the attention, the affection he was receiving from Chrollo while the latter happily drowned him in loving gestures.

 

Eventually, Kurapika sighed, lifting his head and stretching. Chrollo smiled warmly at him before sneaking in a kiss against his forehead as he let a sleepy yawn escape him. Kurapika let out a sarcastic scoff and made a face, but it only widened Chrollo’s smile in amusement.

Fingers teased his now soft, clean hair, “How are you feeling?”

Kurapika sniffled, still not fully awake, “Hungry.”

There was a pause as he realized what he’d said, and Chrollo gave him a doting look, “What are you hungry for? I’ll get you anything.”

Kurapika groaned, laying back on him, “Do you have to get up?”

Chrollo hummed, “Yes, unfortunately.”

Letting out a sigh, Kurapika rolled off of Chrollo, he was feeling a bit nauseous from his hunger, “Can you get me something mild?”

Chrollo sat up, “Toast again? Or do you feel up for something a little more?”

Kurapika thought for a moment, “Maybe something more filling. How about toast with butter?”

Chrollo laughed while Kurapika gave him a faint but humorous smile, “Ah, so much more filling indeed.”

Kurapika closed his eyes again as Chrollo adoringly ruffled his hair, “Thank you.”

Chrollo hummed kindly as he stood up with a huge stretch, “Of course, it’s not a problem.”

Kurapika sank into the pillows again, feeling significantly better after he was finally able to wash and rest. Chrollo left the door ajar as he left the room, and though it couldn’t have taken more than a few minutes, Kurapika found himself dozing off until a highly appetizing smell wafted to him. His stomach growled with a vengeance and compelled him to sit up as Chrollo returned with a plate stacked full of toast.

Kurapika gave him a look, “That’s a lot of toast. Too much toast.”

Chrollo sat on the edge of the bed with an easy look, “I got some for myself too. Half of it’s cinnamon.”

Kurapika sniffed again, the smell tempting him, “You like cinnamon toast?”

Chrollo chuckled a bit, “You have no idea the unbridled joy that cinnamon toast brings to a kid who’s never tasted a real dessert.”

Kurapika thought that sounded sad, but Chrollo had already moved on and was eating a slice of the toast, “You don’t like to linger on your past for long do you?”

Chrollo shook his head, taking the time to swallow before replying, “Not really, no. I like to face forward and in the present. I guess it’s just easier that way.”

Kurapika nodded slowly, picking up his own piece of toast and beginning to eat, “I suppose that makes sense.”

Chrollo just gave an affirming nod before smiling faintly at him, “I’m glad you’re eating.”

Kurapika didn’t answer him with words, opting instead to take another slice of toast as his stomach growled fiercely at him.

 

…

 

Days had passed and though Kurapika spent most of his time eating and sleeping, he could already feel the difference in his body. He still had his ups and downs, snapping at Chrollo now and then, but his moods had grown much milder, and his flares of anger had become less frequent.

 

Kurapika stood before the mirror, brushing his teeth with a degree of enthusiasm. He’d been maintaining his hygiene again, and he was feeling proud of himself for that, even if it was a small task.

A knock on the door drew his attention away, “Do you need something?”

Chrollo’s voice sounded from the other side, “Are you hungry?”

Kurapika rolled his eyes, abandoning the toothbrush after a short rinse and opening the door, “I just finished brushing my teeth.”

Chrollo tipped his head, “You could always brush them again after you eat.”

Kurapika gave him a look but left the door open as an invitation to keep him company, “I’m gonna wash my face first, if that’s all right with you.”

Chrollo nodded easily, “Of course.”

As Kurapika splashed the cold, refreshing water on his face, he felt a hand gently squeeze his shoulder.

He blotted his face dry before looking over his shoulder at Chrollo, “What’s gotten into you?”

Chrollo fluttered his eyelashes with a slight smile, his hand mindfully trailing down until it was wrapped around Kurapika’s waist. Without much warning, he gave it a squeeze, making Kurapika jump a bit, “That tickles! Stop it!”

Chrollo laughed, “Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean to make you jump.”

Kurapika squirmed a bit, but he didn’t shoo Chrollo’s hand away, “What’s up with you?”

Chrollo tipped his head, still giving gentle squeezes to Kurapika’s waist, “You’re putting on weight again. You’ve even got a little roll here.”

The mirth in his eyes was distinct as Kurapika glared at him, “I don’t have a roll. And stop doing that, it tickles!”

Chrollo laughed a bit, “You do too have a roll. But I’ll stop teasing you, sorry.”

Kurapika let out an indignant huff, but he allowed Chrollo to come closer and wrap both of his arms around his waist before nuzzling into Kurapika’s shoulder with a happy sigh, “You’re looking healthier.”

Kurapika was busy rubbing moisturizer on his face, “How so?”

Chrollo gave him a soft kiss to his shoulder, “You’re looking plumper, for one,” when Kurapika glared at him, he responded quickly, “That’s a good thing! Your skin looks brighter and warmer, too. And you’re being kinder to yourself again.”

Kurapika knew what he meant, he’d been disparaging himself aggressively since his ordeal, and it showed in how he neglected his health and hygiene. Chrollo had been kind to him, though. He hadn’t seemed disgusted in the slightest by Kurapika’s condition, and he’d let him sulk without judgement, something Kurapika hadn’t allowed himself.

Thinking about this stirred something in Kurapika. Chrollo had been very kind to him. He’d tended to him and cared for him, he’d healed his wounds and taken away his pain even though it meant he’d be hurting instead. Kurapika had repaid him by lashing out at him, and yet he hadn’t for a second blamed him for it.

Kurapika turned over his shoulder, Chrollo looking a bit surprised by their closeness, “Have I thanked you yet? I mean, have I thanked you properly?”

Chrollo looked mildly confused by the sudden change in atmosphere around them, “You don’t need to thank me. It wasn’t a burden by any means.”

Kurapika reached an arm back, gently brushing the backs of his fingers over Chrollo’s cheek, watching the way those dark eyes widened in surprise, “Just because you accepted it doesn’t mean it wasn’t a burden. Besides, it’s my decision if I want to thank you.”

Chrollo swallowed a bit hard, clearly caught off guard by Kurapika’s sudden affection, “I suppose that’s true, but you really don’t owe me anything.”

Kurapika hummed, twisting in Chrollo’s hold until they were facing each other, “I know. This is something I want to do, all right?”

Chrollo’s eyes were a bit wide as Kurapika rested his hands on his shoulders, gazing up at him while his cheeks flushed a soft reddish color, “You’re being… touchy.”

Kurapika smiled as he laced his arms around Chrollo’s neck, “Is that a bad thing?”

Chrollo shook his head slightly, “No, it’s not bad. A bit surprising though.”

Kurapika hummed a bit, pressing his forehead to Chrollo’s chest, “I want to be close to you, but first I need you to do something for me.”

Chrollo rubbed his back, speaking with deep sincerity, “Anything, just let me know.”

Kurapika smiled a bit before looking up at Chrollo with a pathetic pout, “Please feed me, I’m starving.”

Chrollo flashed him a bright smile, “I’ll go get you something right now.”

Kurapika patted him with a kind smile, snuggling into his chest for a moment before letting go, “Thanks.”

Chrollo snuck a kiss in against his cheek before disappearing back into the front rooms.

 

…

 

Kurapika rolled onto his side, demandingly throwing more of his weight on top of Chrollo, who was trying to read despite Kurapika’s pointed advances.

Kurapika drew up more of his weight onto Chrollo’s chest, drawing a huff from the other man, “You know, you could just say ‘hey, pay attention to me’ instead of doing… whatever this is.”

Kurapika ignored him, throwing his leg over Chrollo’s waist and squeezing him closer, “Hmm? Isn’t this enough?”

Chrollo chuckled a bit, “Well, I got the message, if that’s what you mean.”

Kurapika buried his face into Chrollo’s chest, “Are you gonna put your book down or…?”

Chrollo abandoned his futile reading attempt and wrapped his strong arms around Kurapika, “I thought you liked my reading habits?”

Kurapika happily cuddled into him, “I do. But not when I want your attention.”

Chrollo squeezed him tighter, “Fair enough.”

Kurapika was content to cuddle him for a while, but he soon found himself trailing a hand beneath Chrollo’s shirt, teasing his lean but defined muscles and earning a soft hum.

Chrollo scratched his fingers through Kurapika’s hair, “What’s gotten into you?”

Kurapika walked his fingers higher, feeling Chrollo squirm beneath him, “I’m full and warm and I want your attention.”

Chrollo rubbed his neck, “You’ve got my attention. I think it’s my _affection_ you want.”

Kurapika grumbled into his chest, “Affection, attention, same thing.”

Chrollo kissed the top of his head as Kurapika continued working his shirt up, “It’s not like you to be so touchy. What’s really going on?”

Kurapika sighed, half hoping that Chrollo wouldn’t have paid any mind to his shifting attitudes, “I’m tired of feeling unwanted, like you don’t want to be close with me anymore.”

Chrollo made a face mixed of sadness and hurt, “That’s not true, Kurapika. I just want to let you heal properly, I’m not avoiding you.”

Kurapika murmured into Chrollo’s chest, “I know, I know. I know you’re not avoiding me it just… I don’t know, I can’t help but feel like that. I guess that doesn’t really make sense.”

Chrollo pulled him closer, “It makes sense. It’s not fair to you, but it makes sense. I still don’t want you to feel that way though, is there anything I can do to help you?”

Kurapika thought for a moment, still teasing his fingers over Chrollo’s skin, “Stop walking on eggshells around me. I’m not some piece of fine china that needs to be left in the cupboard for its entire life. I’m not going to break if you touch me.”

Chrollo chuffed sweetly at him, “I know, you’re strong. Although I have to argue the part about you not being a piece of fine china. I mean, you’re certainly beautiful enough that I think it’s a fair analogy.”

Kurapika smiled a bit, letting his fingers brush over Chrollo’s chest, “I missed your flirting.”

Chrollo placed a large hand over the small of Kurapika’s back, curling his fingers into a soft spot in his flesh, “Is that right? You know, words are only a single part of my love language, I can do a lot more should you like that.”

Kurapika squirmed a bit, “I like that. Tell me, what are the other parts of your love language?”

Chrollo worked his fingers beneath Kurapika’s shirt, drawing up a leg and rubbing it against Kurapika’s thigh, “Mm, part one is a loving tongue. Words of empathy, appreciation, and affirmation should pass these lips more easily than the sweetest of wines.”

Kurapika smiled, drawing closer to him, “That’s so very romantic. Seriously, what else have you got?”

Chrollo slipped his hand up, a smooth palm running up his back and making him sigh happily while a strong leg wrapped around him, “The second part… is intimacy. Sensuality and loving touches, gentle kisses and tender embraces reserved for my most precious companion.”

Kurapika felt a blush scorch his cheeks, nuzzling into him and urging him on with slight movements, “You’re really laying it on thick.”

Chrollo kissed the top of his head before cooing at him, “Do you not like it?”

Kurapika tucked his face into Chrollo’s neck, “I love it. Tell me more.”

Chrollo brought Kurapika’s hand to his lips, placing sweet kisses to his palm and wrist, “The third is gift giving. Bestowing upon my love keepsakes and remembrances filled with sentiment and meaning. I don’t have anything on me right now, so I hope you’ll accept my affections for the moment.”

Kurapika’s heart was fluttering with the sweetness, “Of course I’ll accept that.”

Chrollo hummed happily, continuing his gentle affections, “And the fourth, is undivided attention and quality time. When I’m with you, there’s not another thing on my mind, for you occupy it in its entirety, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Kurapika twisted until he could gaze into Chrollo’s dark eyes, “And the fifth?”

Chrollo smiled down at him, eyes glowing with warmth and kindness, “The fifth is acts of service. Making my love my priority, over myself and others, and being proactive in my pursuit to care for you.”

Kurapika smiled up at him, “You really are a romantic.”

Chrollo rolled his weight until he was lying atop Kurapika, “That’s right, so tell me, how can I serve you?”

Kurapika felt his breath catch, he’d been touch starved the last couple of weeks since Chrollo had been tiptoeing around him, and he craved the affection, “What you said about a loving tongue? Take that and apply it to the whole thing about loving touches.”

Chrollo smiled, leaning in close and hovering a hair length away from his lips, “I want to hear you say you want this, that you want me.”

Kurapika felt his eyes grow heavy with lust and love, “I want you.”

Chrollo searched his eyes for a moment longer before connecting their lips and kissing him sweetly. Kurapika arched up into him, grabbing at his shirt and desperately trying to deepen the kiss. Oh, how he missed those soft lips against his. He’d been so deprived of this that it made him ache for more.

Kurapika brought his thigh between Chrollo’s legs, trying to tease him and urge him on by grinding his leg into him.

Chrollo laughed softly against his lips, “Easy there, spitfire. We’ve got time.”

Kurapika moaned lowly, he had missed the nicknames too, “I can’t help it.”

Chrollo kissed over his cheek and the length of his jaw, “Is that right? How needy of you.”

Kurapika keened sweetly as plush lips sucked at his neck. He was so sensitive after his weeks of total abstinence that even the gentle kissing was making his body jerk in response.

At a particularly good nip, Kurapika moaned louder than intended before scoring his nails across Chrollo’s back, “You really are in need. Tell me what you want.”

Kurapika thrust his hips up before replying, “I want _you_.”

Chrollo nipped him again, a bit harder, before lapping at the mark left in his wake, “Mm, all right. I know what you like.”

Kurapika chuckled a bit, sliding his body against Chrollo’s, “That’s right. You know me.”

Chrollo pulled his collar down, kissing his collar bones in between words, “I would still be honored to hear you say it. It’s divine to hear you say such words in your beautiful voice.”

Kurapika burned with a blush, but if it meant Chrollo would hurry up and get on with it he had no reservations about pressing his lips to Chrollo’s ear with a soft moan, “I want you to take me. I want all of you in all of me.”

Chrollo trembled atop of him with a sharp breath, “Whatever your wish is my command.”

Kurapika sighed into his touch, “I want you to take care of me. Can you do that?”

Chrollo purred against his skin, “Of course I can. I’ll do anything for you.”

As he spoke, he ran his hands beneath Kurapika’s shirt and lifted it slowly. Kurapika couldn’t tear his shirt off quickly enough before he tangled his fingers into black tresses and guided Chrollo back into his neck. Chrollo happily obliged the excited Kuruta, sinking his teeth into the muscles over his shoulders and earning a moan.

His tongue ran roughly against Kurapika’s skin and began trailing kisses over his chest, “How do you want it?”

Kurapika huffed as Chrollo grazed his nipple with his lips, “Will you still call me a spitfire if I say that I want it slow and gentle this time?”

Chrollo kissed him warmly, “Of course, even the wildest of cats have their mellow days.”

Kurapika scoffed, but he was warmed by it, “Good, then I want it slow today.”

Chrollo kissed his chest, pulling the skin between his teeth and scissoring gently, “Anything for you, love.”

Kurapika rumbled happily, “You’re being so sweet. What’s the occasion?”

Chrollo placed warm kisses to his abdomen, “No occasion, I’m just being mindful of you. You’ve been through a lot, I think you deserve some special attention, don’t you?”

Kurapika keened as Chrollo sucked at his neck, wrapping his leg over Chrollo’s and locking their ankles. Chrollo nibbled at his ear, making Kurapika rise up to meet his every move, moaning agreeably as he encouraged him to do more.

Chrollo worked his way back down, teasing his nipples and rolling his body down against Kurapika’s. His hands fondled Kurapika’s waistband, thumbs slipping beneath it to brush his bare skin.

Kurapika rocked his hips forward, earning a content hum from Chrollo, “Is this okay?”

Kurapika gripped his hair, coaxing him lower, “Yes.”

Chrollo obliged him, kissing lower before trailing his tongue over the skin and pulling the sweatpants lower to reveal more of Kurapika’s body. He kicked his heels into Chrollo’s thighs, urging him lower still.

A quiet hum erupted from Chrollo’s chest as he pressed his lips to Kurapika’s erection through the thin fabric. Kurapika let his eyes flutter, “Hurry up.”

Chrollo chuckled, still taunting Kurapika by working his lips firmly, “A minute ago you were telling me you wanted it slow. What changed?”

Kurapika grasped black hair, driving his hips into Chrollo’s mouth, “You’re taking too long. Get on with it.”

Chrollo paused for a moment before indulging him and pulling away the remainder of his clothes before stroking him firmly while kissing over his abs.

Kurapika moaned heartily at his touch, earning a kiss to his length from Chrollo’s soft lips, “You’re sensitive today.”

Kurapika’s legs trembled as he sucked teasingly at the side of his erection, “I haven’t,” he broke off this a moan when Chrollo ran his tongue in a wide stripe up his length, “I haven’t really done this since-”

Chrollo hummed with his lips wrapped firmly around Kurapika’s cock, “Of course, I understand. I like it, your voice is so sweet. I don’t mind you being a little extra sweet for me today.”

Kurapika tugged his hair harder, “Hurry up and give it to me, I’m gonna burst if you don’t.”

Chrollo didn’t tease him this time, instead, he took Kurapika’s length in one, smooth stroke, making Kurapika moan for him. He hollowed his cheeks, running his tongue powerfully along the underside of his length while he moved in slow, rhythmic motions. Chrollo’s eyes fluttered closed, he looked like he was seriously enjoying his role of pleasing Kurapika.

Kurapika’s legs jumped and twitched following Chrollo’s hot mouth as it worked him over. Desperate moans erupted from him as he thrust his hips up, “I’m not gonna last like this.”

Chrollo released for a moment, “That’s fine, just enjoy yourself while you do last. That’s all that matters.”

He gripped Kurapika firmly, focusing his tongue and mouth on his tip, sucking powerfully and earning loud whines from Kurapika as he quivered. Chrollo’s hands ran up Kurapika’s chest, gently teasing and massaging his nipples, making the blonde squirm even more beneath him.

Kurapika knew he couldn’t last for much longer, he was deprived and incredibly sensitive and Chrollo was so, so good with his tongue.

Kurapika let his head lull back, urging Chrollo to go just a bit faster as he neared his climax. Chrollo obliged him happily, sucking harder and faster until Kurapika couldn’t deny himself any longer. He let out an ecstatic moan, gripping Chrollo’s hair and forcing him down as far as he could go. Chrollo took him gladly, swallowing down everything that was given to him with ease.

Kurapika panted following his release, shuddering as Chrollo ran his tongue over him a couple more times before drawing away, “You’re always so sweet, such a treat.”

Kurapika huffed at him, “What’s with that tongue of yours today?”

Chrollo lifted himself up until he hovered face to face with Kurapika, “Hmm? This tongue, you mean?”

Kurapika didn’t have time to reply before Chrollo was kissing him, equal parts love and desire as he worked his tongue deep into Kurapika’s mouth. They stayed like that for a while, kissing passionately while Chrollo allowed his weight to rest on him.

Kurapika was warmed from head to toe following his orgasm, but now a chill worked over him. He’d been getting cold easily since his ordeal, and Chrollo smiled kindly at him before kissing his forehead, “I’ll get you an extra blanket.”

Kurapika mourned the loss of his warm body as he rose off of him and went to the closet before pulling out a large wool blanket. He shook it out before swaddling Kurapika in it.

Kurapika watched him, “What about you?”

Chrollo curled up next to him, wrapping his arms around Kurapika, “What about me?”

Kurapika snuggled closer to him, “Don’t you want… You know.”

Chrollo chuffed at him, “I want you to get some rest. I’m not gonna die if I wait a little longer you know.”

He leaned over him, kissing his cheek before stroking his face and laying back down. Kurapika wasn’t about to complain, he was tired and relaxed, and Chrollo was warming him quickly. He sighed, letting himself drift into a shallow sleep while they rested there together.

 

…

 

Kurapika was having a strange dream. It didn’t make a lot of sense, but he clearly remembered Pairo. They were kids, playing in their usual spot when a storm suddenly broke. The bank they were standing on gave way and they plummeted down. Kurapika found himself buried beneath the mud and gravel. Desperation drove him as he clawed his way out, breaking the surface with a huge gasp. He looked frantically around for Pairo, panic searing him when he couldn’t find his friend. Relief washed over him when he spotted Pairo’s red cloak. He ran to him, but when he touched his shoulder, he reeled at what he saw. When Pairo turned to look at him, his face was violently mutilated, blood pouring down his neck and chest.

Kurapika was jolted awake in his panic, but he instantly knew something was wrong. The room was dark and fuzzy, and he couldn’t move.

_Have I been drugged again?_

Alarm coursed through him as he struggled desperately to move, blackness swirling around the edges of his vision. Horrible, distorted cries pierced his ears, and he couldn’t move an inch.

A frightening black figure loomed over him, weight crushing his chest and forcing him into the mattress. Fear pulsed through him as he struggled desperately to fight. Claws raked his skin over his chest and the horrible screaming grew louder still. He couldn’t breathe as he lie there, the weight growing heavier until he was gasping desperately for air.

 

As fiery pain scorched his chest, a final thought tore through his panicked mind, _this is it… He’s come back to finish me._


	19. Regrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some LeoPika undertones here! Next chapter has some KuroShal and we're back to angst and real plot finally!

 

 

Panic surged through Kurapika as he fought off his attacker. The loud, distorted voices still assailed him as he fought, but his limbs just weren’t strong enough to throw off the weight.

The grip on his wrists was crushing and painful and as the figure loomed closer, he finally found his voice so he screamed at the top of his lungs, “Get off!”

He received a growling reply, though he couldn’t make it out, so he screamed again, “Let go of me!”

As suddenly as it began, it stopped, and the haze cleared. He was staring up in wide-eyed panic at Chrollo, who was pinning him down while he struggled.

He was still frightened as he tried to pull free of Chrollo, “Get off of me!”

Chrollo’s voice sounded normal, though tense, as he replied, “Easy! You were having a nightmare, relax. You’re safe now.”

Kurapika gave a final thrash, pulling his wrists free before scratching Chrollo across the face with a vengeance, “Get off!”

Chrollo reeled a bit as he got off of him, “Okay, okay. Take it easy, it was just a dream.”

Kurapika was still gasping for air, clawing his way out from beneath Chrollo, “That wasn’t a dream! I know what a dream is! That wasn’t a dream.”

Chrollo steadied him by his shoulders, careful not to pin him down again, “Kurapika! Hold still, you’re okay now.”

Kurapika threw himself onto his side, pain searing his chest as he did, “What did you do to me?”

Chrollo tried to soothe him, “I didn’t, you did that to yourself. You were having a dream.”

Kurapika glared at him as he looked at the deep gouges in his chest, “I wouldn’t do this to myself! You attacked me!”

Chrollo hushed him, “No, no I didn’t. Kurapika, look at your hands. You hurt yourself.”

Kurapika reluctantly brought his bloodied, shaky hands to his face, “I wouldn’t… You did this.”

Chrollo mournfully shook his head, “No… Kurapika, I wouldn’t hurt you. You were scared, you just panicked.”

Kurapika was still struggling to come to, “No. I know what I saw.”

Chrollo backed off, still looking upset, “Kurapika…”

Kurapika ignored him, “Get me a robe.”

Chrollo nodded slightly, “Okay. Are you okay?”

Kurapika didn’t answer, taking the robe instead and wrapping himself in it. He slid off the bed without sparing a glance at Chrollo, heading straight for the bathroom. Kurapika braced himself over the sink, taking deep breaths and letting his head hang while he tried to calm down. He was dizzy and his eyes were stinging as he parted the robe to take a proper look at his chest.

He winced as he brushed the wounds, shocked at their depth. Shaking his head, he turned the faucet on and began washing his bloodied hands.

Chrollo knocked quietly on the door, “Hey. Are you okay?”

Kurapika drew a deep breath and heaved it out, “I’m fine.”

Chrollo stepped into the room, crossing it slowly towards him, “I’m sorry about startling you earlier.”

Kurapika began blotting his chest gently with a wet rag, “It’s fine.”

Chrollo fished through the medicine cabinet before pulling out some generic antibiotic cream, “Here. This’ll make it feel better.”

Kurapika took the cream, carefully rubbing it into the deep scratches. Chrollo watched him for a moment before touching his hand gently to Kurapika’s shoulder.

Kurapika shrugged him off, “Don’t touch me.”

Chrollo withdrew with a sad look, “Sorry.”

Kurapika let his head droop again, feeling exhausted, “Just let me be, okay?”

Chrollo nodded sadly, “Okay. There’s some Band-Aids in the drawer, if you want to wrap those scratches.”

Kurapika waved him away, taking a few more deep breaths before he splashed some water on his face. Turning around, he headed back into the bedroom, taking note of the blood splatters on the sheets.

Chrollo followed his gaze, “Don’t worry about that. I’ll change the sheets right now.”

Kurapika was already pulling the sheet away, “I’ll take care of it.”

Chrollo tipped his head, “Kurapika? Come on talk to me.”

Kurapika sighed, yanking the sheet off the rest of the way, “There’s nothing to talk about.”

Chrollo gazed at him, “You know I wouldn’t hurt you, right?”

Kurapika stopped what he was doing, “I know. Is that all?”

Chrollo was still watching him, “Then what’s wrong? You look so upset.”

Kurapika ignored him.

Chrollo sighed, “Okay, then, is there anything I can do for you?”

Kurapika gave him a worn-out look, “Can I call someone?”

Chrollo looked surprised, “Of course.”

Kurapika sighed, picking up his phone, thumbing through the contacts until he found the one he was looking for.

Chrollo watched him curiously as the phone rang for a while before someone picked up, a sleepy, soft voice speaking, “Kurapika? Is that you? Are you okay?”

Kurapika smiled faintly to hear that kind voice, “Melody, hi. I’m fine and sorry for waking you up at this hour, I just needed to ask you something.”

 

…

 

Kurapika had been cold towards Chrollo in the two days since his night terror, though he didn’t really know why. He knew Chrollo hadn’t hurt him, he was in a catatonic state when he’d awakened and terror had caused him to accidentally scratch himself. But even knowing this, something was haunting him, and he was shunning Chrollo as a result.

Now he was lying there on the couch, waiting impatiently for a knock on the door. Chrollo was mulling around somewhere, seemingly deterred by Kurapika’s sour mood. He’d come around now and then to ask if Kurapika needed anything, food or otherwise, but Kurapika had either snapped at him or coldly denied him.

Kurapika had reasoned with himself, telling himself this was merely one of his bad moods and that it would pass like all the others had. But even so, he knew this was different. It wasn’t hot and impulsive like before, if was cold and constant now, and he didn’t know what had changed to make him feel this way about Chrollo suddenly.

He was jolted from his musings by a knock at the front door, leaping to his feet a little too quickly. Chrollo appeared from where he’d been staying out of sight, still keeping to the edge of the room as Kurapika answered the door.

It had taken a great deal of convincing after his call to Melody, but Chrollo had eventually agreed that Kurapika needed to spend some time with someone other than him, and finally he’d agreed to allow Kurapika to call his closest friends to him.

Leorio spared him a rough greeting, peering suspiciously around him as though he expected Chrollo would leap at him the moment he stepped into the doorway.

Gon was beaming at him, eyes bright and shining as he lunged at him for a hearty hug, earning a soft laugh from Kurapika.

Killua kept his nonchalant demeanor, but the gleam in his eyes was unmistakable as he gave Kurapika a smile.

And finally, Melody squeezed her way out from behind the vigilant Leorio, giving Kurapika a gentle hug as she greeted him.

Chrollo appeared beside him now, gesturing for everyone to come inside. He’d been uncertain about hosting this reunion at his actual house, concerned it would draw attention, but he seemed to consider Kurapika’s mental condition and found himself agreeing it was probably the safest place.

It took not even a minute for Leorio to start trying to pick a fight with Chrollo, Melody ushering him away with a stern scolding while Leorio strutted with his nose in the air. The display was rather pathetic, and Chrollo’s expression told Kurapika he seemed to agree.

Melody chimed in, “Please, don’t mind him. He’s always a little prickly.”

Chrollo scoffed, “You don’t say.”

They all looked a bit wary of Chrollo, and Kurapika wished he could convey the happenings of the last months in a single sentence so that they’d relax, but Chrollo seemed aware of the watchful eyes as he saw himself off to the bedroom they’d been sharing after a brief introduction.

When he was gone, Leorio turned to him, “That guy gives me the creeps. What does he still want with you anyway?”

Kurapika really wasn’t in the mood to talk about that right now, “Nothing. Some things happened recently and I had to take some time to recover. He looked after me.”

Leorio recoiled in surprise, “Why in the world would he do that?”

Kurapika sighed, “Can we not talk about that right now?”

Leorio’s large hands landed roughly on his shoulders, jolting him unpleasantly, “Kurapika, if you’re in danger all you have to do is say the word and we’ll get you out of here.”

Kurapika scoffed mutinously, “I’m not in danger. I’m not even here against my will.”

Leorio narrowed his eyes, “What? What are you talking about?”

Kurapika shook him off, “Like I said, can we not do this right now?”

Leorio backed off, still looking shocked, “I guess…”

Kurapika let out a hefty sigh as Gon spoke up, “So, what **have** you been doing?”

Kurapika turned to look at him, “Not much… I’ve learned a lot about the Spiders though. How about all of you?”

Gon perked up, “Killua and I are still working on a way to get access to Greed Island. Leorio’s kinda helping.”

Kurapika smiled faintly at Leorio’s offended expression, “I guess the auction didn’t work out then, huh?”

Gon shook his head, “No, but that’s okay. I think I figured out another way to get the game, but I don’t want to jinx it just yet.”

As Gon stuck his tongue out playfully, Kurapika turned to Melody, “How about you? How’s Neon?”

Melody opened her mouth as though to say something, but it just hung there for a moment, “She’s a handful.”

Kurapika laughed a bit, “Yeah… she certainly was that. What did Nostrade think when I went missing?”

Melody tipped her head a bit, “I told him the truth. Well, the important part. That you’d been taken as a captive by the Phantom Troupe. You should know, he was even willing to pay a ransom to get you back.”

Kurapika chuffed, warmed by that, “Really? I can’t imagine why.”

Melody smiled at him, “He really trusts you. He doesn’t just like you as a body guard but as a person too. I guess that’s rare in his line of work, so he values those relationships when they come along.”

Kurapika hummed for a moment, “I suppose that makes sense. I’m still surprised he’d go so far though.”

Melody smiled warmly at him, “You should give yourself more credit. You deserve it.”

Kurapika blushed a bit, Melody would never say something she didn’t truly mean, so the compliment warmed him.

Killua was warily poking around the house, seemingly expecting the whole place to be laid with traps, “It’s kinda weird, don’t you think?”

Kurapika cocked a brow at him, “What’s weird?”

Killua peeked behind the large, flat screen TV, “I don’t know, that someone like him has such a… normal house?”

Kurapika chuckled, “I guess it is a bit odd to think about.”

Killua made a face, “I mean, does he actually have, like, hobbies? That’s so weird.”

Kurapika shook his head in amusement, “He does, actually.”

All eyes turned to him in surprise, it was Gon who asked, “What are they?”

Kurapika took in their shocked faces, humored, “He loves reading, in particular. He’s also got a taste for fine dining, but his tables manners remind me of Hamlet.”

Kurapika laughed to himself as his company gave him deeply confused looks.

Leorio tipped his head, “Hamlet?”

Kurapika giggled, “Hamlet was my pet one horned elephant pig.”

Leorio gaped at him, “Your **what?** ”

Gon chirped happily, “A one horned elephant pig is like a mini pig but they have a trunk and their skull has this sort of bump that looks like a horn.”

Leorio let out a ‘humph’ in interest, “So… a pig? He eats like a pig?”

Kurapika nodded after a moment, “Yeah, pretty much.”

Leorio scoffed, “Of course he does. Gross bastard.”

Kurapika gave him a look, “Oh like you have room to judge. You _invented_ bad table manners.”

Leorio opened his mouth to retort, but Gon interrupted, “What was Hamlet like? Was he smart? Was he friendly? I hear elephant pigs are really, really intelligent, is that true?”

Kurapika laughed, genuinely happy, “Yes, it is true. Hamlet was a lot like a cat in terms of behavior. He loved sleeping on your lap, and he would touch your face with his little trunk all the time. He could even solve mini puzzles. And when he got excited, he would do this little trumpet-oink sound it was adorable. And he would flutter his ears when you pet him just right.”

Gon’s eyes were shining with joy, “I’ve always wanted to see an elephant pig! We didn’t have them on Whale Island.”

Kurapika ruffled his hair, “They were fairly common in the forests of Lusko. But they’re excellent companions if you ever decide you want a pet, just make sure to keep them active, they need a good deal of mental stimulation.”

Leorio shook his head, derailing their chatter, “Anyway, pigs aside, why did you need us here?”

Kurapika swallowed a bit hard, he wasn’t ready to share the details yet, not with Leorio anyway, “Some things have happened recently, and I just really needed to see you all.”

Melody tipped her head, and Kurapika was reminded of her ability rather abruptly, “They were bad, huh?”

Kurapika nodded grimly, hoping that Melody wouldn’t press for details, “Yeah, it was pretty bad.”

Melody nodded slightly, understandingly, but Leorio roughly looked him over, “You look fine, how bad could it have been?”

Kurapika ground his teeth, feeling his face twitch a bit at Leorio’s insolence, “Just because I look fine doesn’t mean I am.”

Melody quietly tried to interrupt Leorio, but he went on anyway, “I mean, there’s not even a scratch on you, are you sure you’re not just looking for sympathy?”

Kurapika opened his mouth for a retort, but Chrollo reappeared before he had a chance to. Leorio recoiled quickly as he approached, but Kurapika was mildly surprised to see that Melody didn’t look concerned as he came to stand next to them.

He primarily addressed Kurapika, though he gave a curious and almost friendly look to Melody, “Are you hungry? I can make something.”

Kurapika’s stomach growled, but Leorio interjected obnoxiously, “Oh yeah, so you can poison us, right? How stupid do you think we are?”

Chrollo gave him a flat look, “Oh, you’re mistaken. I wasn’t offering any food to **you.** I was offering to Kurapika and the other three.”

Leorio flared indignantly, “How dare you!”

Chrollo made a face, “How dare I what? You’re grown, you can cook for yourself.”

Leorio stammered, clearly at a loss while Killua snickered.

Melody spoke up, her usual quiet voice, “You know, Kurapika and I are adults too.”

Chrollo smiled benevolently, “Of course. But I like you two. That’s the difference.”

Leorio was fuming, “You know what? I don’t need your damn food!”

Chrollo shrugged, “Suit yourself. You’re not breaking my heart here.”

Kurapika cut in before Leorio could say anything more, “Well, I’m hungry. I haven’t eaten since yesterday.”

Chrollo nodded at him, “I can cook, or if you’d really like to order in, I guess that’s an option.”

Kurapika looked to Melody and the others, “What do you all think?”

Melody just looked at him while Killua shrugged. Leorio was still snubbing them.

Gon spoke up, “Spaghetti!”

They all turned to him in surprise, Leorio speaking, “Well, you’re sure enthusiastic.”

Chrollo nodded, “It’s easy enough to make, I suppose.”

Leorio shook his head, “No way! He is not eating anything that has been touched by your scheming hands!”

Chrollo rolled his eyes in irritation, “Okay, fine. You make it then.”

Leorio opened his mouth to say something, but he seemed to realize he was just digging his grave, “Huh, fine! I can cook better than you anyway.”

Leorio stormed off to the kitchen while Chrollo grimaced, “Does he ever shut up?”

Killua shook his head, “Nope.”

Chrollo huffed, but said nothing more while the unusual gathering waited for whatever concoction Leorio was making to arrive.

 

…

 

Kurapika ate without a concern in the world, he was hungry, and he was still putting on weight. Gon was quiet, but he ate heartily. Leorio and Chrollo stared each other down the whole time, while Killua and Melody picked at their food, apparently a little put-off by the current situation.

 

After eating, Chrollo hovered around the edge of the group, giving Kurapika the space to talk freely with the other four.

Chrollo leaned back into a chair, pulling out a book and lounging while Melody spoke, “Thanks for the food, Leorio.”

Leorio lifted his head, “Of course, only way to make sure we didn’t all get poisoned.”

He shot a look over to Chrollo, who merely twitched his nose and kept reading.

Kurapika broke in, “Anyway, thank you for coming.”

Melody smiled at him, but Leorio sniffed, “I still don’t get it. I mean, you seem fine. What do you need us for?”

Chrollo looked over at that comment, but was still quiet as Kurapika spoke up, “Was it really that big a favor to ask of you?”

Gon spoke up, “Of course it wasn’t!”

But Leorio didn’t back up the sentiment, “I mean, it’s not like you invited us to a picnic. This is the Phantom Troupe we’re dealing with, you know, the people who violently slaughtered your clan? And yet you say you’re here sipping drinks with their leader on your own volition.”

Kurapika sighed, understanding dawning on him, “Leorio, you don’t understand.”

Leorio narrowed his eyes, no humor gracing them, “Then, please, enlighten me. Because from where I’m standing, it looks like I didn’t know you as well as I thought I did.”

Kurapika swallowed hard, catching the soft sound of a book closing and feeling Chrollo’s critical glare, and his voice came out quietly, “It’s not like that.”

Leorio leaned back a bit, “Then what is it like, Kurapika? Are you working with him? Helping him? Is he threatening you? Is he threatening **us** to keep you here?”

Kurapika shook his head, but Chrollo’s voice broke in, hostile and hard, “What’s it matter to you?”

Leorio glared at him, “Stay out of this. I’m not asking you.”

Chrollo’s face hardened into scowl, but Kurapika spoke up, “Leorio, don’t start a fight.”

Leorio scoffed at him, “You don’t want a fight, then **_you_** answer me.”

Kurapika gave Chrollo a look, relieved when he was clearly angry, but willing to be quiet, “All right. I’ll tell you everything, but not here.”

He gestured for Leorio to follow him, leaving the gravely confused faces of the others behind. Leorio followed him with a harsh look at Chrollo, but to Kurapika’s relief, he didn’t antagonize him further.

 

Kurapika stepped out onto the deck, Leorio following him, still looking unhappy.

He leaned over the railing, gazing out over the green landscape in the cloudy evening light.

He stayed like that for a moment, breathing in the crisp air before Leorio’s voice reached him through the quiet scene, “Are you going to fill me in on why you’re suddenly all friendly with a mass murderer, **the** mass murderer you swore your life to revenge on? You know, the one that you hated more than you loved me? That one?”

Kurapika sighed heavily, not sure he was ready to spill everything but knowing he had no choice in the matter, “I’ll tell you everything, just give me a second to breathe, will you?”

Leorio stayed quiet while Kurapika closed his eyes, drawing a deep breath before launching into the story, the whole story. He didn’t give details about their affairs, but he did tell Leorio that there were, in fact, affairs.

Leorio reeled, and Kurapika could feel his anger, “You’re kidding right? You have to be kidding.”

Kurapika looked away, unable and unwilling to meet the anger in Leorio’s eyes, “I’m not.”

Kurapika had closed his eyes a moment before a fist slammed into his cheek, sending him sprawling onto the wooden deck.

Leorio stood over him, clearly furious, “So now you’re telling me you’re **sleeping** with the bastard? Is that what you’re telling me?”

Kurapika couldn’t find his voice as he felt blood well up from a cut on his cheek.

Leorio was trembling in his rage, “What’s wrong with you? Did he force himself on you?”

Kurapika shook his head, “No! He didn’t.”

Leorio dropped his weight onto him, drawing his fist back as though to hit him again. He froze when Kurapika flinched, his fist shaking for a moment before he slammed it into the wood next to Kurapika’s face.

Leorio’s eyes blazed down at him, “So you **_wanted_** him?”

Kurapika couldn’t answer, but Leorio didn’t need to hear it to know, his voice shaken with anger and hurt, “Why not me? Was my love not good enough for you?”

Kurapika had no answer.

He was still shaking as he rose off of Kurapika, “I’m out of here.”

Kurapika got shakily to his feet, “Leorio wait!”

Leorio glared at him, “No. No, I’m done trying to reason with you. You want him so bad? Go get him. I don’t care what you do anymore. It’s obvious you’re not who I thought you were.”

Kurapika wanted to beg him to stay, but he couldn’t even begin to find the words, “Please, don’t go.”

Leorio scoffed, “Why? You’ve made your choice. You never loved me. Not like I loved you. But you love him? And after everything I’ve done for you.”

Leorio was about to turn away when a new voice joined the argument, taut with rage, “Which is what, exactly?”

Leorio whipped around to glare at Chrollo, who was squared off with him, dark eyes clouded with anger, “What did you say?”

Chrollo took a stride closer, “What exactly **have** you done for him? Because **_I am_** the one who’s been by his side these last six months. Where were you huh? You knew where to find us, so why didn’t you? You know, if you’re so _selfless.”_

A growl rose from Leorio’s throat, “Don’t you dare talk down to me. I’ve done more than you’ll ever know for him.”

Kurapika flinched, he could see the damn of self-control that had been keeping Chrollo quiet break, “More than I’ll ever know? Is that right? Where the hell were you when he was broken and beaten? Where was the good doctor when I was sitting at his side, doing everything I could to help him after he was burned and tortured huh? Where were you then? When he **needed** you.”

For a moment, Leorio looked shaken, clearly not having known the extent of what had happened. Kurapika let out a breath when Chrollo didn’t mention what else had happened.

But the shock was short lived as Leorio’s anger took him over, as it usually did, “You know what? After everything I just learned right here?”

Chrollo’s lip quivered as though he was ready to snarl at Leorio, but Leorio turned to face Kurapika instead.

His eyes were colder than Kurapika had ever seen them as his icy voice spoke, “You **deserve** everything that happened to you.”

Kurapika felt like he’d been turned to stone, cold shock leaving him gaping uselessly in the aftermath of Leorio’s words.

 

But Chrollo was not so stunned.

 

His fist collided with Leorio’s face with astounding force, sending the taller man to the floor before he reeled back, ready to deliver a truly savage beating.

Fear propelled Kurapika as he thrust himself in the path of Chrollo’s pending assault on the dazed Leorio, “Stop!”

Chrollo’s eyes never left Leorio, but to Kurapika’s relief, his fist didn’t come down again, “Why? He **deserves** it.”

Kurapika tried to ease him away, but Chrollo was rooted firmly where he stood, “Just please stop.”

This was the angriest Kurapika had ever seen Chrollo, and when he spoke, he was addressing Leorio again, “How dare you. You have no idea what happened to him. You should get on your knees and shove your filthy nose into the floor at his feet right now, because if it were up to me, you’d be dead.”

The tone Chrollo had used was chilling, Leorio still looked too dazed to really process it, blood pouring from his nose and lip as he glared up at them.

Chrollo said nothing more, just turned and stormed off back inside, leaving Kurapika and Leorio bloodied on the patio deck as the wind picked up, chilling them to the bone.

 

…

 

Kurapika was braced over the sink, scrubbing his face compulsively until his skin felt raw. He stopped for a moment, heaving a deep sigh before splashing more water onto his face and scrubbing with his hands again.

A soft knock got him to stop for a moment, “Who is it?”

He prayed it wasn’t Chrollo or Leorio, and to his relief, it wasn’t, “It’s Melody. May I come in?”

Kurapika sighed in relief, “Yeah, you can come in.”

Melody peeked around the door before stepping in, “What are you doing?”

Kurapika had stopped his incessant scrubbing, but his face had grown red, “I’m just washing my face before I try to sleep.”

Melody tipped her head, clearly not believing him, “You’re still upset from earlier.”

Kurapika scoffed softly, “Is that a question?”

Melody shook her head, “No. I can tell. But I know you wouldn’t say anything, so I thought I’d do it for you.”

Kurapika smiled faintly, a bit cynically, “I guess you heard everything earlier too, right?”

Melody nodded, “Yes, I did. But I understand.”

Kurapika gave her a weary look, “What do you mean?”

Melody reached out, gently touching his chest over his heart, “I understand what you feel.”

Kurapika let his head droop a bit, “Is that right?”

Melody rubbed his shoulder gently, “I can’t try to pretend that I’ve felt exactly what you’re feeling, but I do understand why you’re feeling it. He was good to you, wasn’t he?”

Kurapika was a bit soothed by her company, “He was. He is.”

Melody gestured for him to follow, “Why don’t we sit outside and talk for a while?”

Kurapika nodded slightly, “That sounds nice.”

He followed her out through the front rooms. Gon and Killua were busying themselves, Leorio was slumped on the couch with an ice pack to his face. He turned to look at Kurapika, who pointedly avoided his eyes. Chrollo wasn’t in sight, which meant he was probably sulking somewhere in their shared bedroom.

Once out on the deck, Kurapika found a reclining chair and sank into it with a sigh.

Melody sat in a chair next to him, “Would you mind?”

Kurapika looked over at her, “Mind what?”

Melody held up her flute, “Mind if I play something for you?”

Kurapika smiled, “That sounds delightful right now, thank you. Can I… confide in you about something while you play?”

Melody nodded, “Of course.”

Melody took a moment to warm up, and Kurapika leaned back in the chair and gazed up at the starry sky. The house was far from the city, and the light pollution was minimal so the stars blazed overhead.

Kurapika sighed, his eyes felt heavy as he listened to Melody play. He could feel the tension in his chest melting away, and he felt genuinely calm for the first time since his capture. As he relaxed, he began telling Melody everything that was on his mind.

Before he knew it, he’d dozed off. His eyes fluttered open a short time later, Melody giving him a warm look when he did, “Feel better?”

Kurapika stretched, “Yeah, I do. Thank you.”

Melody offered her hand to help him sit up, “You should get some rest now.”

Kurapika nodded, “Yeah, thank you again.”

He went back inside, bidding good night to Gon and Killua, and ignoring Leorio, who only cold shouldered him anyway.

Kurapika opened the door to the bedroom after getting changed into something comfortable, scowling when he spotted Chrollo, sitting up in bed, reading, and drinking from a glass of wine.

He looked up when Kurapika entered the room, “How are you feeling?”

Kurapika glared at him, “Don’t talk to me.”

Chrollo furrowed his brows, “What’s wrong?”

Kurapika looked away with a shake of his head, “You deaf?”

Chrollo set down his book, giving Kurapika a concerned look, but he stayed quiet as Kurapika threw himself onto the bed, yanking the blanket in its entirety away from Chrollo before swaddling himself completely. He felt Chrollo reach over to him, but his hand stayed hovering above him, never touching him.

He heard him sigh quietly as he retracted his hand, his voice hardly a whisper, “Have good dreams, Kurapika.”

Kurapika’s breath caught in anger, but he managed not to snap at Chrollo. It took a long time, but he eventually got back to sleep.

 

…

 

When morning came, Kurapika woke to an empty bed. The side Chrollo had slept on was cold when Kurapika touched his hand to it. He was disappointed and relieved all at the same time. He sat up, noticing a cup of coffee had been left on the nightstand next to the bed.

Kurapika ignored it, getting up and heading into the front room, dreading what he was about to do, but not seeing any way around it.

Chrollo stepped out of the bathroom only a moment after Kurapika had emerged, his hair was wet and unruly, telling Kurapika he’d just showered.

He gave him an uncertain look, “Do you want breakfast?”

Kurapika gave him a cold, hard look, “I need to tell you something.”

Chrollo furrowed his brows, but followed him once again to the patio.

Once out there, he spoke to him, “If this is about yesterday, I’m sorry for upsetting you. But did you hear what he said to you?”

Kurapika gave him a hard look, “That’s not what I’m talking about.”

Chrollo looked confused, but he fell quiet for a moment, “Why have you been so hostile to me? I know you’ve had a rough time but…”

Kurapika felt his face twitch, an obvious tell, “There’s… something I haven’t told you about what happened.”

Chrollo tipped his head, “What is it? You can tell me anything.”

It took Kurapika a long moment, but he finally got himself to start speaking, “The man who tortured me he, uh… he could…”

Chrollo spoke softly again, “You can tell me.”

Kurapika sighed, “Yeah I know, but I’m not sure what to call it. Shapeshifting? I don’t know but…”

Chrollo eyed him, “But what?”

Kurapika decided to just blurt it out, “But it was you.”

Chrollo recoiled a bit, “Me?”

Kurapika finally turned to face him, full of sorrow, “He looked just like you, he sounded just like you. And every time I see you or hear you, I can’t stop myself from remembering everything he did to me. Even though I know it wasn’t you, I just can’t stop myself from being thrown back there.”

Chrollo’s eyes softened drastically, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

Kurapika sighed, “I didn’t want to tell you at all but…”

Chrollo furrowed his brows again, “But what?”

Kurapika closed his eyes, momentarily doubting his decision.

But he couldn’t think of anything else to do, “I’m leaving. And I thought you deserved to know.”

Chrollo blinked, looking stunned, “Leaving?”

Kurapika felt his breath rush out of him, a surge of relief now that he’d finally said it, “Yes. That’s why I called them.”

Chrollo looked like all the fight had been taken out of him, “I don’t understand.”

Kurapika shook his head, “No, you don’t. And you never will.”

Chrollo swallowed hard, “I’m sorry, I tried. I really did.”

Kurapika gave him a long look, “I know. And it’s really not your fault, but I can not stay here, can’t stay around you.”

Chrollo took a long, quiet moment, staring at the floor, “That much I understand. But after yesterday, is that really what you want? Isn’t there anyone else you can stay with?”

For a moment, Kurapika’s old rage flared up, and he was too raw already to stop himself, “No, you made sure of that seven years ago though, didn’t you?”

Kurapika heard his breath catch, and could see the utterly horrified look in his eyes. It was a genuine, wounded look that was rising directly from his heart.

Kurapika found himself suddenly aware of a siren sounding many miles away, knowing he hadn’t said that for the right reasons. But whatever regrets he had, it was far too late to take back what he’d just said. A mix of remorse and pleasure shot through him. He needed to vent that, he just wished he’d done it for the right reasons.

Chrollo’s face was unreadable, cycling through emotions too quickly for Kurapika to gauge how he was going to react.

Eventually, Chrollo closed his eyes for moment, and when he opened them, they were blank, “Then, take care of yourself, okay?”

He brushed past Kurapika before disappearing inside. Kurapika stood still for a moment, the weight of what he’d said finally settling on his shoulders and making him a bit dizzy.

 

There was a moment that regret pierced his heart more fiercely than anything he could remember, but he braced himself against it and went back inside to find Leorio.


	20. The Meeting

 

 

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since Kurapika had walked out on him. Chrollo wasn’t mad, he really did understand why Kurapika had walked out. Not to mention he’d never been the sentimental type. He cared for his Troupe, they were his family. But beyond them, Chrollo had never felt sentiment for anyone. He’d never been much of a romancer, his only prior relationship was with Shalnark. Now, however, he found himself sulking in regret and sour feelings.

He couldn’t focus, he couldn’t stop thinking about Kurapika, wondering what he was doing, wondering how he was doing, wondering if there was anything he could’ve done to avoid this outcome.

He’d never sulked after something like this, but the whole ordeal had him feeling miserable and dejected, and he hadn’t a single clue why.

Chrollo heaved a sigh, he’d been staring at the same page of a book for hours. He gave up on trying to read, twirling his phone instead. For a moment, he battled with the urge to call Kurapika. Groaning in a mix of confusion and annoyance at himself, Chrollo scrolled through his contacts before settling on one.

The phone only made it through two rings before it was answered, “Hey, Boss. Is something wrong?”

Chrollo felt an odd relief to here his voice, “Nothings wrong Shal. Where are you right now?”

Shalnark hummed, “That’s an odd question. I’m in a hotel about 15 minutes from your place, why?”

Chrollo sniffed, it was odd, but he’d never been one to shy away from coming off as weird, “Is it convenient for you to come over?”

Shalnark huffed, “Sure. Any reason why?”

Chrollo paused, there definitely was, “No. Nothing in particular. I’d just like some company is all.”

Shalnark seemed suspicious, but his trust in Chrollo was absolute, “No problem, I’ll head over now if that’s all right.”

Chrollo signed off, laying back down and waiting for the knock at the door.

 

 

…

 

 

Chrollo shifted through bottles of liquor. He wasn’t great with his alcohol, he didn’t get senseless or anything, but he did get very drunk very quickly. As such, he typically drank beer and would have a glass of wine on occasion.

Now, with his company and a load of sorrows to drown, he was looking for the heaviest stuff he had.

Admittedly, it wasn’t exactly _hard_ liquor. It was a rich bottle of aged Screaming Eagle Cabernet Sauvignon. He only had it because it was expensive, the nearly $3000 price tag had allured him to the black bottle, and it had sat on his shelf ever since. He had no idea what this wine tasted like, but as he grabbed to glasses from the cupboard and headed back to his waiting guest, he really couldn’t care less about flavor.

Shalnark smiled at him as he returned, sitting close enough that he brushed against the other man as he set the glasses and the bottle on the coffee table before them, “What’s the occasion?”

Chrollo leaned back, not so subtly laying his arm across the back of the couch behind Shalnark, “No, occasion. We just haven’t shared a drink in a long time. I thought it was about time to change that.”

Shalnark lifted a brow, “You were too busy with Kurapika to bother with me.”

Chrollo shifted a little closer, “And how’d that work out?”

Shalnark looked a little sympathetic, stealing a glance at where Chrollo’s arm was now touching him, “Sorry about that.”

Chrollo shrugged, withdrawing his arm long enough to pop the cork and pour a glass, handing it to Shalnark.

The blonde gave him a look, “You’re pouring for me? That’s a bit unorthodox, isn’t it? The boss pouring for the subordinate?”

Chrollo finished pouring, handing the glass to Shalnark, “You know I don’t care for formalities and manners. Besides, I consider you my equal, not my subordinate.”

Shalnark tipped his head, bright green eyes glowing in the somewhat dim light, “Is that right?”

Chrollo finished pouring his own glass before leaning back, this time he sat flush against Shalnark, drawing a very curious look from him as he sipped at the wine, “That’s right.”

For a moment, Shalnark’s eyes narrowed, but he leaned into the touch with a comfortable sigh, “This wine is sweet.”

Chrollo just hummed around the rim of the glass, taking a large mouthful of wine and letting it run warmly down his throat.

They went on like this for a time, quietly while Chrollo gradually let his arm come to rest over the broad of Shalnark’s shoulders. The gesture wasn’t lost on the blonde, but he made no comment, only allowed his head to lean back a little as he relaxed.

Chrollo, however, wouldn’t set his glass down.

He had a total of four glasses before the room was spinning too quickly to handle.

Shalnark eyed him, “Four glasses in a row is a lot for you.”

Chrollo barely managed to set the glass down without dropping it, “Uh-huh.”

Shalnark gave him what he thought was a kind look, but he was too drunk to be sure, “A lot of sorrows to drown?”

Chrollo nodded, worried if he spoke, his words would slur.

For the first time, Shalnark reciprocated his affections, using his greater height to wrap an arm over Chrollo and pull him closer. Chrollo went easily, dropping himself against Shalnark and nearly passing out from the weight of his drunkenness.

Shalnark stroked his arm for a moment, “You okay?”

Chrollo hummed, leaning a bit deeper into the half embrace, “Fine.”

Shalnark slumped off a bit to the side, pulling Chrollo into his chest as he did. Chrollo felt hot from the alcohol, closing his eyes and letting time lapse as he lay there, totally wasted.

At some point, Shalnark spoke to him, but it took Chrollo a moment to come into focus, “What?”

Shalnark laughed softly, “I asked if you can remember the last time we laid like this?”

Chrollo smiled faintly, “Of course. Well, not an exact day, you know. But I remember.”

Shalnark laughed again, a bit drunkenly, “Yeah, me too. Those were good times.”

Chrollo sank a little deeper into his chest, “They were.”

Shalnark rubbed his back, “Why’d they have to stop?”

Chrollo took a moment replying, still too drunk for his own good, “I don’t know why they stopped, but… we could always have them again.”

Shalnark froze for a moment, “Is that… okay? What about Kurapika?”

Chrollo flinched at his name, “He’s gone. Left on his own accord and I don’t think he’s coming back.”

Shalnark scoffed, “So I’m your rebound?”

Chrollo groaned, “That’s not what I’m saying.”

Shalnark snorted at him, but he shifted so that Chrollo was completely engulfed in his embrace, “Then what are you saying? Pardon my insolence.”

Chrollo hummed, “Insolence forgiven.”

He didn’t answer Shalnark’s question with words, instead he drew himself up until he lingered face to face with the blonde. Shalnark caught his breath, those brilliant green eyes sparkling in the light.

For a moment he just lingered there, head spinning, wondering what he was doing. Shalnark made no move to push him off, he just laid there, waiting for Chrollo to make the next move.

Chrollo gave Shalnark a testy kiss to the corner of his mouth, marveling the way his eyes fluttered as he leaned into the kiss. Chrollo took that as a sign of receptiveness, swiping his tongue over Shalnark’s lips and earning a soft gasp as he parted his lips and met Chrollo’s tongue.

Shalnark had always been a frisky, needy lover, and it was no different right now. He gripped Chrollo, pulling him deeper into the kiss. Chrollo obliged him, nipping at his lips and sucking them between his teeth.

Shalnark let out an excited whimper, tangling his fingers in Chrollo’s hair before pulling him to his neck, tossing his head back with a light laugh as Chrollo happily sucked at the skin. Shalnark wrapped his legs around Chrollo, locking his ankles as he arched up into him.

Chrollo let out a soft gasp when Shalnark spurred him with his heels, grinding into him, “You’re so needy.”

Shalnark gripped his hair more tightly, begging him to sink his teeth into his neck, “And you’re a giver. Some things never change right?”

Chrollo gave in, biting hard beneath his ear and earning an ecstatic moan as Shalnark scored his nails across his back.

Chrollo’s head spun as he ran a hand beneath Shalnark’s shirt, a pang of guilt stabbed him when he briefly became aware enough to consider what he was doing. He wondered what he was doing, he was so drunk and all he wanted to do release all that frustration and satisfy himself. But he also knew in his heart that as he lay there atop Shalnark, he was wishing it was Kurapika instead.

He was so drunk, he pushed his thoughts aside and kissed Shalnark again.

For a moment, he enjoyed the hot, sweet kiss, but after that moment passed, Shalnark pushed him off.

Chrollo’s head reeled as he was shoved off of the blonde, taking a long moment to come back into focus, “What’s wrong?”

His words slurred, and he cleared his throat, blinking a few times before Shalnark replied, “You’re drunk.”

Chrollo shook his head, trying to clear it though only making it worse, “So?”

Shalnark’s voice was soft as he stood up, “If you do this, you’ll wake up tomorrow full of regret wondering where Kurapika is and why you’re waking up with me and not him.”

Chrollo grabbed his hand as he turned to leave, “That’s not true.”

Shalnark gently pulled his hand free, “Yes, it is. Come on, I’ve known you for how long? I can tell.”

Chrollo couldn’t get to his feet, but he pleaded with Shalnark anyway, “Don’t leave. I won’t do anything if you don’t want but please, I want your company.”

Shalnark sighed, shaking his head, “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’ll see you later, Boss.”

Chrollo groaned regrettably as he left, slumping onto the couch and momentarily asking himself what the hell was wrong with him. It didn’t take long for Chrollo to succumb to his drunkenness though, and he passed out after a few minutes of wallowing in self-pity.

 

…

 

Kurapika sighed, tossing onto his side. He’d been plagued with restlessness for most of the night, and he soon found himself giving up the idea of sleep. He got to his feet, carefully stepping over Leorio who was fast sleep next to him, and made his way to the kitchen.

Kurapika fumbled through the cabinets and the small fridge, but nothing seemed appetizing as he sifted through the same old cans of soup, cereal, and a couple packets of instant oatmeal.

_Talk about a lousy selection…_

A hand landed on his shoulder, giving Kurapika a terrible start as he nearly leapt out of his skin.

He whipped around, coming to face an equally startled Leorio, “What the hell’s wrong with you?”

Leorio huffed in exasperation, “Me? Why are you so jumpy, you nearly gave me a heart attack!”

Kurapika grunted, “Gave **you** a heart attack? Why are sneaking up on me in the middle of the night?”

Leorio laughed now, coming down from his fright, “I wasn’t sneaking up on you! But I’m sorry, let me make it up to you.”

Leorio wrapped his arms around Kurapika’s waist, hugging him closely and earning an exasperated sigh from Kurapika, “Honestly! Clumsy as you are you’d think you’d make **some** kinda noise!”

Leorio laughed in good humor, burying his face in Kurapika’s hair, “Hey now, I’m not **that** clumsy.”

Kurapika leaned into his embrace with a huff, “You busted your ass falling in the shower when you tried to pick up the shampoo bottle just this morning.”

Leorio squeezed him, “That wasn’t my fault! Hotel baths are always slippery because of the stuff they use to clean them.”

Kurapika scoffed, “Oh sure!”

Leorio playfully shook him before landing a soft kiss against his neck. Kurapika released a soft sigh, tipping his head so that Leorio could bury his face into his shoulder.

Leorio nibbled at the skin for a moment before breathing in his perfume with a content hum, “Have I told you I’m sorry?”

Kurapika reached up and stroked his cheek, “Every day for the past two weeks.”

Leorio kissed him gently on the cheek, right over the now healed cut, “I want you to know that I mean it.”

Kurapika sighed, pinching Leorio’s cheek, “I got it the first time. I know how you are, temperamental, aggressive, erratic, short tempered.”

Leorio groaned, “I’m sorry… I just couldn’t bear the thought of you being stuck there. And since you’ve been back, look at you, you’re healing, you’re practically glowing. I told you it was probably just Stockholm Syndrome.”

Kurapika said nothing, he let Leorio continue with his tender kisses, but when he closed his eyes, guilt consumed him to know he imagined it was Chrollo with him again. Leorio was oblivious as he continued his kissing, nipping at the skin beneath Kurapika’s ear and earning a soft gasp. Leorio worked a hand beneath Kurapika’s shirt, rubbing gentle circles while he tipped his head back to kiss him. He gave Kurapika a sweet kiss with his tongue, moving his hand up to tease at his chest.

Kurapika found himself moments from giving in to Leorio when his phone rang, startling them both.

Leorio released him as he fished through his pocket, “Who in the world would be calling you at 3 in the-”

He broke off with an unpleasant glare as Kurapika looked at his phone, immediately recognizing the number, “It’s Chrollo…”

His heart leapt into his chest as he went to answer the phone. He’d been longing to call Chrollo from the first day he left, but he had no idea what to say. After all, what right did he have to call Chrollo after he walked out on him? But now Chrollo was calling him, and it made his heart flutter.

Leorio put a hand over the phone, “Well don’t answer it!”

Kurapika pulled his phone back, “I have to. If he’s calling it could be because we’re not safe.”

Leorio scoffed, but let Kurapika walk away, “Or it could be because he’s trying to trick you into something again, don’t let him!”

Kurapika waved him off as he answered the phone, not even getting a chance to greet him before an alarmed voice spoke to him, “Kurapika! Are you okay?”

Kurapika stammered, “Y-Yes I am, what’s going on?”

Chrollo’s voice spoke quickly and frantically, “Okay, you need to listen carefully. I’m gonna give you an address, don’t write it down, just memorize it and head there immediately. I’ll meet you there.”

Kurapika shook his head, “Okay, what’s going on?”

Chrollo hushed him, “I’ll explain it later, right now you just need to listen to me.”

 

…

 

Chrollo woke with a searing headache to a knock at the door. He groaned painfully as he sat up, the room swimming around him as his headache throbbed and the knocking only grew more insistent.

_Holy shit they better knock it off before I kill them…_

Chrollo managed to find his feet, a foul and sour mood already descending on him, “I’m coming! For God’s sake **stop pounding on the damn door!** ”

Whoever it was seemed to get the message, the knocking stopped almost immediately. Chrollo cursed a storm under his breath before reaching the door, surprised when he stole a cursory glance through the window and recognizing Shalnark.

He opened the door, greeted by the bashful blonde, “Sorry… I guess you’re pretty hungover from last night?”

Chrollo grimaced in an almost unfriendly manner, “You couldn’t figure that out **before** beating the door half to death?”

Shalnark tipped his head, “Come on, I wasn’t knocking **that** hard, was I?”

Chrollo curled his lip, serving as enough of an answer, “What are you doing back here? I thought you left?”

Shalnark stepped inside as Chrollo moved to give him room to pass, “I just slept in my car. I thought I ought to come and check on you.”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, “Since when are you so worried about me?”

Shalnark gave him a curious look, “Haven’t I always been?”

Chrollo’s head was hurting too much to wonder what was strange about that sentence, “My head feels like there’s an ax in it. I’m gonna go take some aspirin.”

Shalnark nodded, following him to the bathroom where Chrollo fished through the medicine cabinet, filling a small Dixie cup with tap water from the sink before downing the two small pills.

He let his head hang for a moment, an odd, cold sensation creeping up his arms.

He tried to shake it off, but it just made his hair stand on end, _that’s odd…_

Shalnark’s gaze was unusually sharp, Chrollo could feel it in his back. Lifting his head just enough to meet Shalnark’s gaze in the mirror, he felt every hair on his body rise when he met those green eyes.

_That’s killing intent…_

Realization dawned on him, but he couldn’t tell if the man standing behind him knew that yet, “So what brought you back here?”

The man was still leaning in the door jamb, “I told you, I was worried about you Chrollo.”

Chrollo twitched his nose ever so slightly, _that proves it._

The man pushed out of the doorway, taking a step closer before Chrollo halted him, “Don’t take another step. Or I’ll kill you where you stand.”

His eyes widened a bit, “What are you talking about?”

Chrollo scoffed, “Shalnark never calls me by my name. Kurapika said you were lousy at doing your research. Did you really think I was so drunk I wouldn’t recognize a fake?”

The man snorted, “You are a sharp one. But it doesn’t matter. You’ve already let me get too close.”

Chrollo laughed slightly, “Is that right? Have you forgotten who I am? You’re nothing but a lowly thug who had to pick on some poor sap without his Nen.”

He tipped his head back, arrogance radiating from him, “You really think I wouldn’t account for that? Your Nen? How do you know I don’t have a plan to seal it?”

Chrollo laughed maniacally, “You’re funny! You see,” his voice dropped low, “It doesn’t matter what you do. I could kill you with my Nen or I could just be done with this worthless conversation right now and kill you with this toothbrush next to me. Which do you prefer?”

The man shivered, but more from excitement than anything else, “Oh, you’re such an **alpha,** aren’t you? I like that. I like it when they fight me to the very last moment. I hope you keep that bitchy attitude when you see what I have planned for you.”

Chrollo let a low growl rise in his throat, “Challenging me will be the death of you.”

The man cracked his neck, reaching into an inner pocket in his shirt, “I look forward to it. I hope you deliver on all those ferocious words.”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, tensing his muscles and getting ready to fight. The man behind him held completely still, telling Chrollo whatever he had planned was in that pocket.

_He’s expecting me to make a move for something on the countertop, so…_

Chrollo dropped his weight quickly, pivoting on his left foot before using his right to launch himself at the man. He aimed for his concealed arm, but the man twisted himself just enough to guard it. He pulled his arm free, but Chrollo couldn’t see what he was holding. Instead Chrollo gripped his collar, pulling him into a powerful punch. He drew his hand back to deliver another, but the man snaked his arm around Chrollo’s and held him there.

Chrollo tried to pull free, but the man raised his free hand and for the first time, Chrollo recognized what he was holding.

_A needle?_

The man slammed his hand into the muscle in Chrollo’s upper arm, just beneath his shoulder. Chrollo yanked himself free, trying and failing to tourniquet the area above the injection site.

The man laughed at him, “It won’t work. I made sure not to leave enough room for that.”

Chrollo scoffed, “Fine. I’ll just kill you before whatever was in that vial takes effect.”

The man tipped his head, hands behind his back, “My, my. You are a fearless one. Aren’t you even going to ask what I just injected you with?”

Chrollo huffed, “It’s not worth asking.”

Without another words, he drew his hand forward, attempting to focus his Nen. Grimly, he realized very quickly what the purpose of the injection was.

Sauntering forward, the man crowed at him, “Too bad for you! You can’t use your Nen.”

Chrollo dropped his hand, “Makes no difference to me.”

The man called his bluff when he pulled out a gun and aimed it at Chrollo, “Oh but, I think it does.”

Chrollo didn’t have a chance to think before he pulled the trigger, a bullet tearing through his abdomen. He dropped onto one knee, pain searing him. He was growing weaker by the second as the man came to stand above him.

Glowering down at him, he carefully removed a new vial from his pocket, “Now, be a good boy and hold still.”

Chrollo spat at him, “Go to hell. I’ll meet you there.”

He laughed heartily, “Now I like you! Not a cowering pathetic wimp like your little lover boy.”

Chrollo growled at him, “Don’t you talk about him to me.”

The man tisked at him, “Touch a nerve? No matter,” he leaned down, holding the needle inches from Chrollo’s neck, “This’ll make you a tame puppy after all.”

Chrollo thrashed in his hold, earning an annoyed grunt from the man, “Hold still! This has to go directly into your vein unless you want all the tissue around the site to rot away!”

Chrollo growled at him again, but he was already losing the strength in his limbs as the needle pierced him. Within seconds, Chrollo felt his whole body begin to numb.

The man stood up, looking satisfied when Chrollo couldn’t get to his feet, “Now, where oh where did your little phone go?”

He fished around the counter for a moment while Chrollo struggled to stand up, his limbs numb and pain from the gunshot wound pulsing through him.

Chrollo had barely managed to get to a kneeling position when the man slapped his hand to his face in exasperation, “Silly me!”

He reached down fumbling through Chrollo’s pocket before pulling out his phone. Once he had it, he kicked Chrollo to the floor, putting a foot to his face and holding him there, “Now, I wonder what the passcode could be?”

The man mulled for a moment, Chrollo beginning to find it difficult to stay awake, “Ah, I have no idea! But,” he gazed menacingly down at Chrollo who was helpless beneath him, “I’ll bet the sweet little lover boy is on your emergency dial list just in case, am I right?”

Chrollo glared at him as he dialed the emergency contact, praying Kurapika wouldn’t pick up while the man cleared his voice and altered it to match Chrollo’s perfectly.

To Chrollo’s dismay, he heard Kurapika answer, the man standing above making a perfect impersonation as he spoke, “Kurapika! Are you okay?”

Chrollo shut his eyes tightly, helplessness making him burn in fury, but fear for Kurapika washing over him in the same moment. It took only seconds more for Chrollo to succumb to the powerful anesthetic in his system, and the last thing he heard was Kurapika’s alarmed voice speaking on the other end, “Okay, just tell me where to meet you.”

 

 


	21. Would You Rather

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content and Trigger warnings for;  
> Torture, Electric Shock, and Graphic Violence

 

 

               The first thing Chrollo felt as he came to was dizziness. He couldn’t see anything, but the air around him told him he was in a small room, probably the size of a walk-in closet. After a while longer, Chrollo became aware of the heat of someone else in the room. He quieted himself, focusing on the faint sound of someone breathing deeply and slowly, no other sounds coming from them.

_They’re unconscious…_

Chrollo felt cold, hard realization set in.

_Kurapika…_

Chrollo tried to move, but his whole body still felt numb. Focusing on his fingers and toes, he began to work his limbs out of atrophy, but the bindings on his legs and arms were so tight he couldn’t manage much movement anyway.

He gave up, stretching his legs out in an attempt to brush against Kurapika and get a sense for the space and layout of the room. He realized for the first time that he was collared, a chain hooked to the wall behind him allowed him only a small amount of slack. Twisting himself while keeping his neck close to the wall, he kicked his legs out, but connected with nothing.

Chrollo tired quickly, powerful sedatives still flowing in his blood. He lay there, out of breath and dizzy again, laying on his right side and grimacing at the awkward angle of his left shoulder due to the bindings.

He closed his eyes, zugzwang, sometimes the best thing to do was nothing at all, even when one feels compelled to move. Knowing when to fight the current and when to float with it. In the back of his mind he knew he’d need to save his strength, and at least for the moment, Kurapika was unconscious and out of reach, and he was far too weak to struggle free of the bindings. Taking deep, slow breaths, Chrollo allowed himself to slide into a static state, emptying his mind and fully relaxing his body while completely internalizing his disturbed aura. It was an advanced Nen technique derived from one of the most basic ones, the perfect execution of Ten in order to rapidly cleanse and heal the body of all fatigue. It required the ability to completely clear the conscious mind under duress, and Chrollo’s contentment with his own mortality made him exceptionally good at that part.

 

…

 

Time had passed when Chrollo was brought back to consciousness by a rustling sound across from him.

He shifted a bit, trying to relieve the pain in his shoulder that had become more noticeable as his system broke down the tranquilizer, “Kurapika?”

A muffled reply came, followed by the clank of the chain he guessed was around Kurapika’s neck as the blonde pulled at it.

Chrollo sighed, “Are you gagged?”

Another muffled reply confirmed his suspicion, “Okay, just listen. Can you tap your foot to the floor?”

Kurapika confirmed with a tap, “Okay, good. Tap your foot for yes, stay still for no. Do you know where we are?”

No reply came, “All right. Do you know what happened?”

Kurapika tapped his foot, “Do you know who it was?”

Another tap, much to Chrollo’s disappointment. He’d earnestly been hoping Kurapika wouldn’t know where he was, figuring it might be easier on him that way.

Chrollo sighed, pausing for a moment to listen for any other sounds, but none came, “Do you know why we’re here?”

Kurapika tapped his foot twice, “Is that your way of saying maybe?”

Kurapika tapped his foot once, “All right. Is this the same place you were before?”

Two taps, “You were unconscious when you were brought here, but there’s some familiar things?”

One tap, “Dark and small room, is that what’s familiar?”

One tap, followed by two, making Chrollo shake his head, “Yes, followed by maybe?”

No tap, “Okay, then, Yes, but there’s something else?”

Another tap. Chrollo paused, taking a moment to think and run through his options and surroundings, one particular thing stood out to him, “The smell? The damp air, it smells like we’re underground, is that it?”

Kurapika enthusiastically tapped his foot, Chrollo thought for a moment, “All right… If it’s the same place, I know the layout. But that doesn’t make sense, he wouldn’t bring me back here if I know where we are. So… Why? Are we really in the same place? Or are we in a similar place somewhere else?”

Kurapika, somehow, sarcastically tapped his foot twice, making Chrollo scoff, “Yeah, I know, I’m just thinking aloud. Damn, this would be easier if you could just talk.”

Kurapika grunted around his gag while Chrollo took pause, “Kurapika… Do you know who it is? Not just that you recognize them, do you know their motive and who they’re working for?”

Kurapika tapped his foot confidently, making Chrollo think to himself, _God Kurapika, why wouldn’t you tell me this sooner?_

He shoved the cynical thoughts away, Kurapika was on his side, and now was no time to start pointing fingers, “Okay. Okay, do you know what they want? The information they want?”

Kurapika tapped his foot, “It’s the same person who took you before, right?”

There was a slight change in the smell in the room, Chrollo recognized epinephrine, adrenaline, the hormone responsible for fear scent as Kurapika tapped his foot once.

Chrollo blinked, despite the darkness that blinded and unsettled him, “Did you give them the information they wanted the first time?”

Kurapika tapped his foot, a slight sound escaping from the gag as he did, clearly, he wanted to say more but he couldn’t.

Chrollo thought for a moment, “All right, we were onto mafia leads, specifically the Lusko mafia. Was it related to that?”

One tap, “Okay… Okay… what’s important about the mafia?”

He was quiet for a moment, running through prior conversations, “A mole. Was it about a traitor?”

Kurapika firmly tapped is foot, Chrollo paused for a moment, uncertain if he wanted an answer, “You gave this information the first time, yes?”

Kurapika tapped his foot again, _Why wouldn’t you tell me… Why wouldn’t you tell me about a mole if you knew…_

Chrollo shook his head in the darkness, for a moment a pang of betrayal sparked in him, but he squashed it down when he heard footsteps approaching, “Kurapika, whatever he says, whatever he asks, direct his questions to me, all right?”

Kurapika let out a confused ‘mmph’ from around the gag in his mouth, “Just trust me and do it, okay?”

There was one, resolute tap as the door opened, flooding the room with dim light that seemed brighter than the sun to Chrollo’s strained eyes.

For the first time, Chrollo could see Kurapika. He was tightly bound, stripped to lightweight underclothes and certainly cold, Chrollo was relieved to see he was relatively unharmed.

But his heart ached when he met his eyes, in the light they glowed a bright, frightened red. A fierce protectiveness swamped him when he saw the utter terror in his beautiful eyes.

As the figure sauntered closer, Chrollo spoke up, intent on keeping him away from Kurapika, “So, you finally decided to show yourself eh, you sad little bastard?”

The man tapped Chrollo with his foot, “Says the one tied up on the dirty floor. You’re the one- sorry, the **ones,** who look sad and pathetic.”

Chrollo growled at him, “Oh yeah? Why don’t you untie me and we’ll see just how sad I am while I rip you limb from limb?”

The man shivered, kinking his neck as he did, “Boy, I like you. You’re gonna be **fun** aren’t you?”

Chrollo lunged, yanking hard at the chain around his neck, “Like I said, untie me and we’ll really have some fun.”

The man came close to him, towering over him, “You got a lot of movement back, eh? That’s not good. We should do something about that.”

The man reached into his pocket, pulling out a sealed needle and a vial.

A low sound rumbled in Chrollo’s chest, “Touch me and I’ll kill you.”

The man smiled, “Hold still, will you? I mean, you’re not afraid of a shot, are you?”

Chrollo tipped his head defiantly, granting a clear shot to his neck, “Go ahead. Try me.”

The man took pause before cautiously gripping Chrollo’s chin and leaning in to pierce him with the needle. The moment his eyes flickered to focus on his jugular vein, he snapped at him, grazing his teeth over his skin as the man stumbled back, falling.

Chrollo let out a borderline maniacal cackle, “What’s the matter? I don’t bite! Not hard, anyway. Get off your ass and come on back over here, I’ll play nice.”

Chrollo flashed him a wide smile, showing his slightly sharper than usual eyeteeth as he did.

The man glared at him, “You’re a sick fucking bastard, you know that?”

Chrollo chuckled to himself, “What’s that? I can’t hear you, maybe you should come a little closer.”

The man stood up, approaching him again, “I like your spirit. Rather, I’m gonna love destroying it.”

He didn’t waste time, gripping Chrollo by the hair and yanking his head to the side before injecting him.

Chrollo thrashed for a moment, testing the restraints in vain. The man leaned over him, “Don’t worry, this won’t put you to sleep. It’s just to keep that nasty ability in check.”

Chrollo spat on him, earning a grimace, “I don’t need my Nen to kill you.”

The man stepped back, looking suddenly disinterested in Chrollo, “As much as I like your spunk, I’m getting tired of your empty threats.”

Chrollo dipped his head a bit, speaking quietly, “Then untie me. I will deliver, I always do.”

The man snorted, “Yeah, I’m a freak, but I’m not stupid.”

Chrollo tipped his head, “No, just ugly and spineless.”

The man gave him a light kick, “I’ll give you ugly. I’ve got a bit of a, well,” he allowed a freakishly long tongue the dropped nearly to his collarbones, “Bodily anomaly.”

Chrollo broke into laughter, earning a scowl, “What are you laughing at? That’s a bit insensitive don’t you think?”

Chrollo shook his head, “A chameleon. Is that it? You’re literally like a chameleon?”

The man smiled, “I’m honored, you finally figured it out. That’s right, I’m employed by the Lusko Don, my designation is Chameleon, for obvious reasons.”

Chrollo looked back up to him, “Can I ask you something? Humor me, please.”

Chameleon gave him an odd look, “Huh?”

Chrollo smiled, “Can you do the eye thing? You know, look two different directions and shit?”

Chameleon drew back, looking utterly vexed, “You are weird. But to answer your question…”

The man rolled his eyes in opposite directions, earning a thrilled laugh from Chrollo, “Excellent! I appreciate that, you’re humoring me. Maybe I’ll kill you quickly after all.”

Chameleon scoffed, but turned his attention to Kurapika, who still looked petrified, “Mm, thanks, but, I have a different interest at the moment.”

Chrollo ground his teeth, if he lashed out, it would confirm his weakness to Chameleon, but if he didn’t, Kurapika would be at his mercy.

Chrollo watched quietly for a moment, judging if it was a bluff or not. The man crouched down next to Kurapika, earning a terrified whimper from him as Kurapika turned his bright scarlet eyes on Chrollo, searching desperately for help. Chrollo met his eyes, willing him to understand.

Chameleon ran his hands over Kurapika, “You were so much fun. I don’t usually like the squealers, but you’re so… different. Maybe it’s the eyes, God! Do I love those eyes.”

Chameleon let his tongue loll out, touching it to Kurapika’s temple and earning something like a scream from him.

Chrollo nearly chipped his teeth, “That’s enough! Leave him alone!”

Chameleon laughed, “Ah, that’s right. He’s yours, isn’t he? He belong to you? I bet a man like you, a bandit, **really** loves his possessions, right?”

Chrollo growled at him, “Your deal’s with me, right? So, come deal with me, you gutless freak.”

Chameleon mulled for a moment, gripping Kurapika’s restraints and hauling him into a sitting position, “Mm, but taking your possession right in front of you, that sounds like more fun.”

Kurapika was terrified, the smell of his adrenaline only seemed to thrill Chameleon.

If looks could kill, Chrollo would’ve murdered the man instantly, “Get away from him. I’m warning you.”

Chameleon ignored him, instead removing the gag from Kurapika’s mouth before speaking close to his ear, “Now, be a good boy. Be a real good boy and beg me to stop.”

Kurapika whimpered in fear as a hand ran under his shirt, but he clamped his jaw shut. Chrollo willed him to stay strong, if he showed fear, it would only spur the man on.

Chameleons hand reached Kurapika’s chest, teasing him before he used his tongue to try and pry his lips apart, “Oh, come on now. Just ask me nicely to stop. Beg me to stop.”

Chrollo’s voice was hoarse and tense when he spoke, “Don’t. Whatever you do, don’t.”

Kurapika squeezed his eyes as tightly shut as he could before he opened them again, blazing red as met Chrollo’s gaze, terrified but determined.

_You are brave. You are so brave, and so strong. Just hang in there._

Chrollo hoped his message reached Kurapika as Chameleon continued trying to rouse a reaction from him.

Chameleon scoffed, “Stubborn bitch.”

He withdrew for a moment, Kurapika looking so relieved Chrollo thought he’d be sick. Chameleon stood up, eyeing the two of them while he thought. Chrollo met Kurapika’s eyes again, the fear in them was overwhelming, he just hoped he could hang on.

Chameleon hummed, “Well, you won’t beg me. And I’m not turned on by you just looking like you’re ready to cry but not actually doing it. So, why don’t we play a game, yeah?”

Kurapika found a burst of defiance, “Go to hell. I’m not doing anything for your sick amusement.”

Chameleons eyes lit up, “Oh ho! Look at you! Got a little fight after all?”

Kurapika spat at him, earning an amused laugh, “Well then, what about you?”

Chameleon turned to face Chrollo, who gave him a stone-cold look, “Not a chance.”

Chameleon looked miffed, “Yeah that’s- that’s not gonna work. So either you _humor me,_ or I gouge pretty boys eyes out and turn em for profit right now. And I guarantee you, that’s only the start. You can ask him, he knows.”

Chrollo glanced to Kurapika, who confirmed Chameleons statement with a look, “He’s not lying.”

Chrollo heaved a sigh, “What’s your game?”

Chameleon smiled, “That’s more like it! It’s called ‘Would You Rather?’ and goes like this, I’m going to do **something** to one of you, and I’ll leave it up to you who I do it to. Simple.”

Chrollo and Kurapika looked at each other, Kurapika speaking, “And if I refuse? You might think I’m just gonna roll over for you, but you’re wrong.”

Chameleon tipped his head curiously, “Is that right? Well then, I’ll just torture both of you. Maybe I’ll castrate you both and use your severed appendages as gags hm? Sound good?”

Chrollo eyed him carefully, nothing suggesting that Chameleon was bluffing, “All right. Let’s play.”

Kurapika shot him a look, “I refuse!”

Chrollo gave him a steady look, “Kurapika, think.”

Kurapika spat fury at Chameleon, “No, I refuse! You kill me if you want but I’m not playing your game!”

Chameleons eyes lit up, “Oh… delightful. I like you better like this. And here I thought I’d broken you last time. Guess you’re tougher than you look. Too bad you don’t really have a choice.”

Chrollo hushed Kurapika gently, “What’s your game? I mean details.”

Chameleon turned his attention away from Kurapika and back to Chrollo, “You sound almost interested. How disturbing. The game’s simple, as I said. You’ll each get a turn, I say what I plan to do, and you tell me if I should do it to you, or the other one.”

Chrollo glared at him, “And what if we refuse?”

Chameleon unsheathed his knife, “Then I’ll make good on my earlier promise, you know, unlike you, I keep my word.”

He pointed the knife at Kurapika’s groin when he spoke, earning a glare of anger and fear from Kurapika.

Chameleon tipped his head, seeming convinced by their silence, “Now then, why don’t we get down to it?”

 

 

{REDACTED SCENE}

Content warnings for torture, electric shock, and graphic violence.

 

 

Chameleon flayed Chrollo’s shirt with his knife, exposing the upper half of his body before tightening the chain and forcing him into a sitting position. Chrollo glared defiantly, earning an amused chuff.

Kurapika was given the same treatment, but he closed his eyes tightly instead before being pulled onto his knees.

Chameleon looked between the two, seeming greatly pleased, “Now, how shall we begin?”

Kurapika kept his eyes closed, so Chrollo spoke, “I’m begging you to give me a chance and a reason.”

Chameleon scoffed, “All right, smart ass. Let’s start with this, would you rather I give you the first sparks, or him?”

Chrollo narrowed his eyes, “Sparks?”

Chameleon was fumbling with something, “Answer the question.”

Chrollo huffed, “Tell me what it entails.”

Chameleon muttered something, “Fine. I’m talking about this.”

He lifted his hands, displaying a pair of jumper cables and two sponges, “Now, give me your answer. You, or him?”

Chrollo took a couple deep breaths, taking one look over at Kurapika, who’d opened his eyes now to look at him, fear glistening in them despite his earlier displays.

Chrollo’s answer was resolute and firm, “Me.”

Kurapika’s face wavered for a moment, but Chrollo met his gaze steadily as Chameleon laughed, “How selfless of you! I’m really shocked, I thought you’d sell him out in a heartbeat. Then again, maybe this is just a display? Either way, this should be fun.”

Chrollo scoffed, “Find out for yourself. I’m not scared of you.”

Chameleon laughed, soaking the sponges before clamping them between the steel teeth of the cables, making them sizzle. Chrollo’s face remained stoic all the way until Chameleon jabbed him in the side with one of the sponges, making his face contort while the electricity painfully coursed through him.

He spat on the floor once Chameleon removed the sponge from his burning side, “Is that it? That’s pretty sad.”

Chameleon mocked him, “Hardly. This is just a mild warm up. You know, getting a hang of the rules and stuff.”

Chrollo huffed, “Is that right? Maybe you’re just a lousy torturer. I got a friend who might be able to teach you a thing or two.”

Chameleon laughed, “You are truly an ass, you know that?”

Chrollo smiled, ignoring the scorched patch of skin on his side, “I try. Truly.”

Chameleon turned back to him, “Now, this one’s gonna be a whole lot nastier. I’m upping the amps and I’m gonna soak you in water this time. So, you, or him?”

Chrollo met his eyes directly, no hesitation, “Me.”

Chameleon mulled for a moment, a pitcher of water in his hand, “You sure?”

Chrollo didn’t blink, “Positive.”

Chameleon smiled, dumping the cold water over Chrollo’s chest and torso, “All right then.”

Chameleon ditched the sponges, clamping the jumper cables to his chest, the teeth biting painfully into the skin around his nipples, but not piercing it. Chameleon flipped the switch, running the powerful current through him and forcing him to grind his teeth as a throaty groan rose from his throat. His whole body contracted in agony at the powerful current, the pain especially gripping in his chest, his ribs feeling like they’d been split open.

Chameleon stopped, giving him a moment to fight to catch his breath. It was incredibly difficult to breathe, but Chrollo kept his eyes defiantly on him.

Chameleon crowed at him, but Chrollo refused to entertain him, “Now you’ve gotten a taste of the shock. So,” he turned to Kurapika, “Your turn. You, or him?”

Kurapika screwed his face up, but Chrollo spoke before he could answer, “Kurapika… Put everything on me, no exceptions.”

Kurapika furrowed his brows, “I can’t do that.”

Chrollo looked at him, pain from head to toe pulsing through him, “Yes you can. Don’t worry about me.”

Kurapika’s face betrayed his thoughts, upset with Chrollo for worrying about him since he didn’t have his Nen to recover from his injuries like Chrollo did.

Chameleon groaned, “Hurry up. Or I’ll shock you both.”

Kurapika closed his eyes, “Him.”

Chrollo nodded contently, steadying his breathing in preparation for the next shock. It came more intensely than the last. Chrollo was gasping in agony by the end of it, his chest splitting in pain.

Chameleon laughed at him, “Not so tough now?”

Chrollo drew a deep breath before spitting in his face, “Don’t you wish.”

Chameleon wiped his face with a scowl, “Aren’t you cute? How about we continue? You or him?”

Chrollo couldn’t breathe deeply, his chest in too much pain, “Me. Bring it on you bastard.”

 

…

 

By the end of it, Chrollo’s muscles spasmed and twitched on their own accord. He couldn’t breathe, couldn’t even hold his head up. He’d taken a total of ten rounds, his skin seared and muscles locked in pain.

Kurapika watched him closely, “Are you okay?”

Chrollo tried to focus, the pain debilitating as Chameleon sat back and watched, his voice was terse with the strain of speaking, “Perfectly fine.”

Chameleon chuckled, “You should really lie down for a bit. I’ll be back in a few for another round. We’ll see if you’re still so keen on being the big, strong, tough guy when I get back.”

Chrollo grunted, “Don’t hold your breath. It’s gonna take a lot more than that pathetic display to break me.”

Chameleon scoffed, but he slackened the chain fastened to Chrollo’s neck enough for him to lie down and recover for a bit. He did the same for Kurapika, who glared venomously at him as he did so.

When he was gone, Chrollo allowed himself to slump to the floor, exhausted physically and mentally from withstanding the electrocution.

He took a while to breathe before speaking, “Kurapika?”

Kurapika was watching him through narrowed eyes, a swirl of emotions Chrollo couldn’t quite read dancing behind them, “Yes?”

Chrollo drew a slow breath, heaving it out painfully, “I need you to tell me what else he’ll do. I remember some of it, but I need details if I’m gonna brace myself.”

Kurapika shook his head slightly, “You can’t take everything on yourself.”

Chrollo chuffed, “Why not? You did.”

Kurapika scowled at him, “He’s escalated. He’s pushing you right to the edge of what your body can handle and he’s only just started. Also… he’s not asking you any questions…”

Chrollo grunted, “That’s not a good sign. It might mean he tortured you for the information, and he’s going to torture me for fun to see how long I last before I die. Or it could just mean he’s trying to intimidate me.”

Kurapika gave him a sorrowful look, “He definitely enjoys doing it. Which is exactly why we should alternate with the punishments.”

Chrollo shook his head, “Not a chance. He’ll just prolong the torture twice as long until we’re both at our limits. He wants to get off on the mind games just as much as the physical agony he’s causing.”

Kurapika closed his eyes for a moment, “So he’s waiting for us to turn on each other for his amusement?”

Chrollo nodded, utterly exhausted, “That’s right. I don’t plan to give him that pleasure.”

Kurapika opened his eyes again, looking terribly weary, “Then you need to know, electrocution is only the first part of his game. It’s actually… the least painful of what he does. It was for me, anyway. It’s only the first step, and he ups the pain level with every new step after it.”

Chrollo closed his eyes, focusing on his own breathing, _bring it on…_

Chrollo stayed still for a moment, trying to soothe the pain in his chest, “Okay. After electrocution, what’s next?”

Kurapika sunk to the floor, “Probably one of two things, either more electrocution, or he’ll beat you. When I was here last time,” Kurapika’s voice shook, and he took a moment to clear his throat, “He beat me first. Maybe he shocked you first to try and weaken you, I don’t know. I think he likes doing things with his hands though, makes it personal.”

Chrollo nodded, “That sounds reasonable. Let me reiterate… No matter what it is, you are to tell him to do it only to me. Do you promise me that?”

Kurapika looked so weary, “I don’t know if I can make that promise.”

Chrollo sighed, warmed with affection for Kurapika, “Fine. I won’t make you promise. I command you to do it.”

Chrollo smiled faintly at Kurapika’s startled expression, “What? No!”

Kurapika eyed him mournfully as he spoke, “Did you… forget about that?”

Kurapika scoffed at him, “It wasn’t exactly on the forefront of my mind right now.”

Chrollo gave him a soft look, “Sorry. I hate to do that to you, but if it relieves you of the guilt of saying it, I’m willing to do it.”

Kurapika sighed heavily, “What are we going to do?”

Chrollo thought for a moment, “Right now, we buy time. Shalnark and Feitan are going to notice when I don’t check in, I’m sure of that much. What about you? You stayed with Leorio, right? He’ll notice when you don’t check in?”

Kurapika drained of any color, “He’s not gonna notice…”

Chrollo gazed at him, “What happened?”

Kurapika swallowed hard, “He was with me… I don’t know what happened to him, but he got shot.”

Chrollo sighed, “I’m sorry. But he’s got a good healing Nen doesn’t he? He probably patched himself up and he’ll be looking for you.”

It was empty encouragement, Chrollo had no idea if Leorio was even alive, and Kurapika didn’t seem reassured, “Yeah… probably.”

Foot steps sounded again, and the two fell into an eerie silence. Chrollo tried to give him a comforting look, but it had little to no effect as the door opened again. Chameleon returned and, as Kurapika had predicted, he had a long, narrow rattan cane in his hand.

He didn’t say anything as he stepped behind Chrollo, looping another rope around his wrist bindings before harshly pulling his arms behind his back, forcing him to stand and dislocating his shoulders while providing a clear shot of his back.

Chameleon looked amused by his tense face, “Should I do the same to him? Or will you insist I only play with you again?”

Chrollo let out a breath he was holding, “Sorry to disappoint you. You’ll have to settle with me.”

Chameleon chuckled, “Oh, don’t sell yourself short. You’ve got your charms.”

Chrollo scoffed, “You flatter me, truly.”

Chameleon lifted the rattan, “All right. Each round is ten strokes with the cane. You can start since you’re so eager to play with me. Would you rather you, or him?”

Kurapika shut his eyes tightly, Chrollo just smiled slightly, “Me, of course.”

Chameleon laughed, “All righty then.”

The first stroke landed with a horrible crack across Chrollo’s back. Chrollo jerked in his restraints, blood welling instantly in the wake of the terrible wound. The breath was knocked out of Chrollo, and before he could even gulp in a breath, another stroke gouged a wound through his flesh.

After the ten strikes, Chrollo’s head was swirling with pain and dizziness. He took a moment to catch his breath, hot blood pouring down his back and either staining what was left of his clothes or dripping to the floor.

Chameleon ran a finger through on of his wounds, making Chrollo grit his teeth, “It’s almost a shame. Your tattoo was quite intricate. I liked it! Too bad it’ll be covered in scars now.”

Chrollo huffed quietly, unable to breathe, his ribs shifting awkwardly as he did, “It’s just… a tattoo. Nothing special.”

Chameleon ran his fingers down his back and through the wounds, “Still out of breath?”

Chrollo sighed the air out of his lungs, “A bit, perhaps.”

Chameleon withdrew, smearing the blood on his fingers over Chrollo’s lips and watching with thrill as Chrollo licked it away as he turned to Kurapika, “I guess I know what to expect, but I’ll ask anyway, you, or him?”

Kurapika had no choice, the chain still bound his heart, his voice was quiet, “Him.”

Chameleon chuckled, lightly slapping Chrollo’s face, “That must upset you.”

Chrollo smirked, “Not in the slightest.”

Chameleon brought his lips close to his ear, “This is only the start. I don’t expect a little shock and a beating to be the downfall of the mighty Spider head. But don’t worry, I’ll have my way with you after all.”

Chrollo stayed quiet but for a soft laugh as Chameleon picked up the rattan again. Chrollo endured another savage beating, his ribs cracking and a profound pain gripping his back.

 

Chrollo hung limply from the restraints after a fifth beating, his breath weak but stable for the moment. Chameleon circled him, eyeing him like a trapped dog, “Mm, you look good like this.”

Chrollo blinked slowly, staying quiet.

Chameleon seemed miffed by the lack of response, “I think I want to make this a bit more… personal.”

Chrollo looked at him through the corner of his eye, “How so?”

Chameleon ran his hands over Chrollo’s sides, abandoning the cane, “How about I use my hands instead?”

Chrollo blinked, “Whatever suits you…”

His voice trailed off a bit, concerning Kurapika, but Chameleon smiled, “You’re spirited, I like that. I’m going to beat you, ten punches enhanced with Nen every round. So, Kurapika, you or him?”

Kurapika looked away, seeming pained to even be saying it, “Him.”

Chameleon circled around to stand in front of Chrollo, smiling at him with gnarled teeth, “Good choice.”

Chameleon slammed a fist into Chrollo’s abdomen, somehow more painful than the cane as it cracked his ribs further. Punch after punch, Chrollo endured the agony, spitting out blood after the third round.

His breathing was ragged, blood pouring from his lip while his eyes fluttered. Chameleon stroked his face for a moment before wiping the blood away with his thumb while licking his own lips. Chrollo’s eyes were barely open, but he kept them on Chameleon as he hung there.

Chameleon tipped his head curiously at him, “You done for today?”

Chrollo blinked heavily, still having a hard time breathing through his cracked ribs, “I’ll go… as long as I have to.”

Chameleon smiled at him, “Since I like you, I’m gonna cut our time early today, you look like you could use the rest. And I want you as fiery as possible for what we’re gonna do tomorrow.”

Chrollo spat feebly onto the floor by their feet, “I’ll be waiting.”

Chameleon laughed to himself before unceremoniously dropping Chrollo to the floor. Chrollo hit hard, eyes widening in pain for a moment before he succumbed to a fit of coughing. Chameleon watched him through his fit until he finally settled, his breathing noisy and rattling.

Chameleon eyed Kurapika for a moment, “When I’m done with him, maybe I’ll finish my business with you.”

Kurapika glared malevolently at him, “You come and try it, you bastard.”

Chameleon gave him a long look from head-to-toe before scoffing and turning to leave.

After the door shut, Kurapika turned frantically to Chrollo, “Are you okay?”

Chrollo’s eyes fluttered open for a brief moment before closing again, “Stupid question…”

Kurapika struggled in his restraints, stretching out as far as he could and reaching towards Chrollo with his legs, “Can you breathe?”

Chrollo took a few raggedy gasps, “Kinda…”

Kurapika struggled more, finally managing to brush against Chrollo, “Hang in there. Just, hang in there.”

Chrollo welcomed even the slightest contact, “I plan to. Don’t worry… not about me.”

Kurapika stayed like that with him, Chrollo was grateful for it as he allowed himself to slip unconscious between the pain and his lack of oxygen.

 

 

{REDACTED SCENE END}


	22. Paralyzed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Content and trigger warnings for the entire chapter for;  
> Burning, Chemical Burns, Graphic Violence, and (Non-Graphic) Sexual Assault

 

 

Chrollo woke to a scalding pain over his exposed torso. He jolted in his restraints, triggering a coughing fit due to his broken ribs. He glared blearily at Chameleon who was standing over him with an empty pot that he guessed had contained hot water just a few moments before.

Chrollo steadied his breathing after a few more feeble coughs, “What… the hell was that for? You ass…”

Chameleon made a peculiar face at him, “I thought you croaked! You weren’t waking up.”

Chrollo was dizzy, pain stabbing in his chest as he let his gaze drift to Kurapika, who was gazing back wide-eyed, confirming what Chameleon said.

Chrollo just grunted in pain, “You couldn’t just… let me die?”

Chameleon laughed, “Now where’s the fun in that? No, we’re just getting started. How are you feeling today?”

Chrollo scoffed, still dazed, “Like hell, how else should I be feeling?”

Chameleon seemed to purr at him, “You’ll be feeling a whole lot worse by the end of today. Can you even sit up on your own?”

Chrollo just gave him a look, making no attempt to get up, “Does it look like I can?... Go to hell.”

Chameleon crowed at him, “I’ll give you a break.”

Chrollo glowered at him, “Oh yeah? After you dumped… what was that, boiling water, on me to wake me up from my… peaceful slumber.”

Chameleon smiled at him, looking almost genuinely fond, “It was just hot water. Don’t be so dramatic.”

Chrollo just grunted at him as Chameleon lifted him by his restraints before rather gently laying him on his back.

Chrollo glared at him with an abundance of suspicion, “What are you scheming?”

Chameleon spent a short while stroking Chrollo’s chest, seeming entranced by his severely damaged ribcage, “You’re really fine, you know that?”

Chrollo gave him a deadpan look, “Your wicked tongue falls on deaf ears.”

Chameleon tipped his head ruefully, “Oh, come on now. I’m being serious.”

Chrollo scoffed, but he laid still as Chameleon rose to his feet, fishing around amongst things he’d brought in the room before waking Chrollo.

Chameleon picked up a familiar rod before turning to where Chrollo lay, “Know what this is?”

Chrollo sighed painfully, “Of course.”

Chameleon smiled down at him, turning on the iron, “Then you know what’s coming?”

Chrollo closed his eyes, “Naturally.”

Chameleon gave the iron a moment to heat up before glancing between the two of them, “You’re a lot more tame than yesterday, do you still insist on being stubborn?”

Chrollo scoffed, “I’m far from tame.”

Chameleon waved him off, “Hush, will you? You can’t even sit upright and you want me to believe you’re still full of fight?

Chrollo found it hard to breathe from this position, so he just stayed quiet and closed his eyes.

Chameleon made some kinda noise, “I’m not sure how long you’re gonna last, honestly. I mean, look at you. Blondie here didn’t look so awful until the fourth day or so. But you look like a mess, and it’s only been a day.”

Chrollo looked up at him, rather weakly, “That’s because… the left half of my ribcage is collapsed… Kinda hard to be spunky… when I’m suffering hours of oxygen deprivation.”

Chameleon chuckled, “Suffering? Trust me, you’re not suffering, not yet.”

Chrollo rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

Chameleon tapped his cheek with his shoe, “Hey now. Don’t die yet. After all the years I spent trying to get to you, it would be a shame to finish so early.”

Chrollo’s entire ribcage shifted with a feeble cough, “I can’t tell you… how little that means to me.”

Chameleon scoffed, but watched the awkward movement of his bones when he coughed intently, “That bad, huh? Maybe I got carried away. Tough it out, all right? I want to spend more time with you.”

Chrollo opened his eyes, glassy and rheumy from strain, glaring at Chameleon.

Chameleon made a face, contemplating, “Hmm… All right. Look, I’m gonna do something nice for you while I wait for the iron to heat up.”

Chrollo was shaken with another cough, a metallic taste making his tongue sting as blood rose from his lung, “God… you’re such a saint.”

Chameleon laughed sarcastically, “I do love that tongue. Don’t go anywhere.”

Chrollo glared weakly as Chameleon left, releasing a groan when the door closed.

Kurapika looked terrified, “Are you really dying?”

Chrollo looked over to him, “How direct…”

Kurapika didn’t look like he was receptive to humor at the moment, “I’m serious. How bad is it?”

Chrollo gave him a faint smile, “I’m not dying.”

Kurapika’s brow furrowed, “But it’s really bad, isn’t it?”

Chrollo could lie, but he figured it wasn’t going to convince Kurapika in the slightest, “It’s pretty bad. I think my left lung has been crushed, I can taste blood every time I cough. It hurts like all hell, but you only need one lung to survive, and as far as I can…” he broke off, completely out of breath and dizzy, “As far as I can tell… my right lung is doing all right.”

Kurapika was gazing at him, eyes filled with fear, “We need to do something… You’re really injured and he’s sealing your Nen, you can’t recover without it or medical attention…”

Kurapika trailed off as footsteps reproached the dark, murky room. Chameleon returned with a hand-held box, coming to sit next to Chrollo.

Kurapika glared at him, “What is that?”

Chameleon had left the door open so that he could see what he was doing, “It’s a tackle box.”

Kurapika glared at him, “What are you gonna do to him?”

Chameleon shot him a look, “I don’t want him keeling over. I’m gonna help him, honestly.”

Kurapika opened his mouth to say something, but he was interrupted by Chameleon pulling out fishhooks and line.

Chrollo watched him through bleary eyes, “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Chameleon made a face, “Shut up. Be grateful I’m doing this much.”

Chrollo watched him lamely as he ran his fingers curiously over each one of Chrollo’s ribs, admiring the odd dip on the left side and the grimace on Chrollo’s face.

Chameleon strung the hooks before targeting the flesh between his rib bones, “I should confess. I’m not only doing this to keep you from dying on me, I’m gonna get a thrill out of seeing your reaction.”

Chrollo just watched him, too weak to fight him as he pierced the flesh with one of the hooks. His brow furrowed in pain from the puncture as Chameleon strung another hook, repeating the process beneath all five of his broken ribs.

Chameleon admired the thin streams of blood that flowed around the fish hooks that were curved perfectly around his bones, “Ah, this is gonna hurt. Delightful.”

He swiped his tongue over his lips, looking greatly aroused as he took hold of the fishing lines attached to the hooks and knotted them together. He wrapped the line around his hand, gazing at Chrollo’s still figure for a while before he abruptly yanked the fishing lines, a resounding and awful crack following.

Chrollo couldn’t hold back a howl of pain as his ribs were roughly snapped back into place. Chameleon laughed, clearly thrilled, as Chrollo succumbed to violent coughing fit. Despite the agony, Chrollo was able to cough up the blood that was clotting in his lungs now that his ribs weren’t crushing down on them. After a while of painful, rough coughs, Chrollo managed to clear his lungs enough, and a terrible relief flooded him as he was finally able to breathe again.

Chameleon watched him in fascination for a while as he caught his breath, “You’re quite attractive like this. Helpless, in so much **pain,** with all that pretty blood splattered on you, you’re much more my type than blondie over there. I’m glad you decided to play with me.”

Chrollo opened his eyes, grateful despite the pain for his easier breathing, “You make it sound like you extended an RSVP to me.”

Chameleon chuckled, “You sound better. Does that mean you’re ready for another round?”

Chrollo heaved a final sigh, resilience returning as his breathing improved, “You gonna flap your disgusting lips all day? Get on with it you bastard.”

Chameleon shivered, “How eager of you. I’m a little concerned by that, tell me,” he began removing the fishhooks from Chrollo’s flesh, “Are you a masochist? I mean like, a **real** masochist? One who loves being tortured?”

Chrollo turned to face him, beckoning him closer with his eyes, voice a whisper, “Come here and let me tell you.”

Chameleon narrowed his eyes, leaning cautiously a bit closer, “The hell you want?”

Chrollo fluttered his eyelashes, “A little closer, come on.”

Chameleon made a face, making sure to keep out of snapping range, “What?”

Chrollo smiled faintly at him, drawing a deep breath now that he could, and spitting on him. Chameleon lurched back with a gag, “You and your damn **_spit!_** What is it with spit? Fuck,” Chameleon wiped his face with a disgusted grimace, “Is this like, a kink or something? A spit kink?”

Chrollo curled his lips in a smile, laughing tauntingly, “What? You aren’t grossed out by a little spit are you? A big tough bastard like you? Nah.”

Chameleon shook his head, “All right you smart ass bastard, that iron’s plenty hot so you tell me, you or him?”

Chrollo snorted at him, “Me.”

Chameleon picked up the iron, ghosting it over Chrollo’s chest and abdomen. Chrollo clamped his jaw shut and waited for the pain. Chameleon taunted him with the iron for a while, tapping him quickly with the iron and watching as the burned skin rose in response. He clearly got off to the sight of it, so Chrollo forced his face to be as steady as possible to deter him.

After a while, Chameleon sighed, “Why don’t we try something else?”

Chrollo hissed a breath through his teeth, “Do what you want, I’m not gonna beg you to stop.”

Chameleon scoffed, “You know how farmers keep track of their stock?”

Chrollo glared at him, “They brand them.”

Chameleon smiled, stepping out just long enough to lift a red-hot branding iron from a furnace somewhere outside the room, “That’s right.”

Chrollo’s lip quivered, for all his strong talk, Chrollo was in agony. He wasn’t frightened, but the pain was enough to make him wish for any kind of relief, even death. But as he let these thoughts graze his mind, his gaze drifted to Kurapika, and shoved the dark thoughts away. If he died, Kurapika would be next. And for that reason, Chrollo was going survive.

Chameleon returned, carefully setting the iron against the wall long enough to take his knife and cut a line through the leather of his pants before tearing it open and exposing Chrollo’s thigh.

Chrollo glared at him as he picked up the iron, gripping Chrollo’s legs before sitting his weight on them to hold him steady. For a moment, he simply brushed the bare skin of his thigh.

Drawing the iron back, he gave a long, sadistic look into Chrollo’s eyes before he firmly pressed the brand into his skin. Chrollo cried out in agony, his mind going blank as his body desperately convulsed in a powerful spasm in an attempt to get away from the terrible heat.

Chameleon withdrew the brand after a grueling ten seconds. Chrollo’s head was spinning in horrible pain, smoke still rising from his skin as the wound opened, revealing the intricate cross with three dots above, below, and beyond each arm. The smell of his burned flesh made Chrollo wretch while his legs trembled in response to the shock of the brand.

A low, anguished moan escaped Chrollo as he lay there. He gathered the strength to lift his head enough to look at the awful mark on his thigh, Chameleon whistling in joy, “Wow. You wear that well!”

Chrollo hissed in pain as Chameleon ran a thumb over the wound, making Chrollo’s legs tremble more. He tried to retort, but the pain threatened to make him scream instead, so he kept his jaw clenched.

Chameleon pressed a thumb firmly into the fresh burn wound before drawing it to his lips and curling his tongue over it, relishing the tang of his blood as he did, “You know… This brand I gave you, it should honor you. You like crosses, don’t you? I mean, your little bullshit organization hijacked them, for what, aesthetics? Do you even know what this brand means?”

Chrollo tried to still his tremors, “The… The cross… Three dots at every end… It’s a symbol of…”

Chrollo broke off with a tormented gasp, so Chameleon scoffed at him, “Let me tell you now, you know **nothing.** It’s a symbol fit for a bandit like yourself.”

Chrollo groaned, letting his head drop. Chameleon laughed at him before turning to Kurapika, “Now, you or him?”

Kurapika made a terrible face, “Him…”

Chrollo ground his teeth as he was roughly thrown onto his other side, Chameleon tearing another strip free and exposing more skin on his other thigh.

Chameleon gave him a wicked smile, “Now, be patient while I warm this back up.”

Chrollo let out a feeble whine, stealing a miserable glance at Kurapika, who looked close to tears as he met his eyes.

Chameleon returned with the brand, and for one of the first times in his life, Chrollo trembled in fear as he held him down again. Chrollo shut his eyes tightly, unable to swallow his tortured screams as he slammed the brand into his thigh, pressing and holding it for twice as long until Chrollo truly screamed his lungs out.

Chameleon peeled the brand away, ripping strips of skin off with it. Chrollo contorted his face, for a moment he longed to cry out for help, but he furiously squashed the urge.

Chameleon rolled him onto his back again, looming over him, “You look like you’re really hurting. Actually, you look pathetic. I left you with my mark, twice, what do you say we step this up for real?”

Chrollo let out a shaky breath, “I will kill you…”

Chameleon’s eyes were suddenly cold, losing what fond amusement Chrollo seemed to bring him, “Yeah, right. I’m so certain you will.”

Chrollo met his gaze evenly, “What do you want from me?”

Chameleon glared at him icily, “Nothing. All I want is for you to suffer at my hand.”

Chrollo scoffed, “So you just plan to torture me to death?”

Chameleon nodded, “That’s right.”

Chrollo gave him a mutinous look, “Can’t wait…”

Chameleon didn’t return his empty threats as he had been until then, instead he stood up and searched through the pile of things he’d brought until he found a pair of gloves. Chrollo watched him like a hawk as he picked up a large glass jar and a glass dropper.

He leaned over Chrollo, “I’ve got a new game. Rather, a new way of playing. I’m going to give you two options, you tell me which you prefer.”

Chrollo glared at him, “And if I refuse?”

Chameleon narrowed his eyes, “Then I’m taking blondies eyes.”

Chrollo’s lip quivered, “What’s first?”

Chameleon filled the dropper, “First, eyes or mouth?”

Chrollo glared, “What?”

Chameleon kicked him, making him yelp in pain, “Answer me.”

Chrollo growled, but he didn’t retort for fear of being kicked again, “Fine… Mouth.”

Chameleon roughly gripped him by his jaw, forcing his mouth open before squeezing the dropper and spraying the liquid into Chrollo’s mouth.

Sourness made Chrollo retch, Chameleon slapped his hand over Chrollo’s mouth and held it closed, “Now let’s see how long you can hold it.”

Chrollo’s face screwed up in pain as his jaw was held closed and the inside of his mouth began to burn furiously from the acid. He writhed in his bindings, but he couldn’t free his jaw. Chrollo kicked out as hard as he could, but his legs didn’t have the strength to force Chameleon away.

Chameleon glowered at him as Chrollo retched even more violently, “You’re moving too much.”

Chameleon finally released his face and allowed him to spit the acid out before he heaved, his body attempting to throw up but only spitting up bile from his empty stomach. Chrollo desperately spat as much as he could, trying to soothe the burning to no avail while Chameleon pulled a vial and needle from his pocket.

Kurapika’s voice cut through the pain Chrollo was in, “Don’t.”

Chameleon glared at him as he crouched next to Chrollo, “Don’t what?”

Kurapika pulled at his restraints, “Don’t drug him anymore! Ketamine takes days to clear the system, you’re going to kill him if you keep giving him those drugs.”

Chameleon scoffed at him, “And?... Do you really think I care about that?”

Kurapika stared desperately at him as he injected Chrollo again, watching as his body grew still beneath him.

Chrollo’s mouth still burned terribly as his body grew paralyzed from the ketamine, Chameleon leaned close to his face, “Now, tell me, eyes or mouth?”

Chrollo drew a shuddering breath, barely audible as he spoke, “Mouth…”

Chameleon repeated the process until Chrollo could hardly speak, then poured a jug of water into his mouth and throat to neutralize the acid. Chrollo turned his head away, aware of the blood that ran from the terrible burns.

Chameleon stood up again, addressing Kurapika, “Why don’t you tell him what comes next? You remember, don’t you?”

It took all of Chrollo’s willpower to turn and face Kurapika as he spoke, “He’s… It’s…” Kurapika shook his head helplessly, “White phosphorus.”

Chrollo felt his stomach knot painfully, genuine fear turning his blood cold, “You’re…” The pain from speaking was incredible, “Gonna kill me…”

Chameleon shrugged, “I don’t think you’ll die from it. But even if you do, like if you’re heart gives out or something, it doesn’t matter to me. I’ll just have Kurapika keep me company while your corpse rots on the floor.”

Chrollo let out a pained grunt, “You’re… not even… gonna ask me a question?”

Chameleon scoffed, “I’m growing tired of that. I think I’ll just have my way with you from now on.”

Chrollo growled at him, but there was nothing he could do as Chameleon pulled a canister from a jar of water. He pulled a mask over his face before dipping his gloved fingers into the canister and quickly smearing a cold gel over Chrollo’s abdomen and chest, working as quickly as possible as stepping back just in time for the gel to ignite.

Chrollo’s mind felt like it was shot by an invisible bullet, the pain so unbearable that his consciousness fractured to cope with it. But even so, Chrollo was aware of just how terrible the agony was. He didn’t know if he screamed or cried out, but he couldn’t imagine that he held his screams in. When he began to come to, the first thing that assailed his senses was the disgusting smell of burned flesh and the putrid odor of the white phosphorus.

Chrollo finally managed to open his eyes, aware of his own tears and breathlessness as his mind slowly reconnected with reality. He could hear voices, distinctly hear Kurapika’s, but he wasn’t conscious enough to process what he was saying. Chrollo took a few deep breaths, his body gripped with serious distress from the wound that covered his abdomen.

Chameleon leaned over him, running a finger through the wound and making Chrollo’s body tense while he released an eerie sound from deep in his chest, “Now… you look perfect. So, so perfect. Kurapika… tell him what’s next. I wanna hear it.”

Kurapika swallowed hard, “I don’t… I can’t do that.”

Chrollo felt the fight draining out of him, and in desperation, he turned to look at Kurapika, hoping to find something worth fighting for in his eyes while Chameleon spoke again, “Tell him! Every detail, tell him what I’m about to do to him.”

Kurapika closed his eyes, “I won’t.”

Chameleon gave him a heated look, “Then I’ll just have to show him.”

Chrollo let out a pained whine as Chameleon unceremoniously pulled him closer. Kurapika let out a desperate sound, “Please don’t.”

Chameleon ignored him, taking his knife and cutting free the bindings on Chrollo’s ankles before positioning himself in Chrollo’s guard and leaning over his chest, “I’m gonna have so much fun with you now. I’ve been waiting for so long to have you like this, writhing in agony, helpless, ready to die and mine for the taking. I will be the last thing you see, the last thing you feel, and I will be a part of you forever.”

Chrollo closed his eyes as Chameleon leaned down, sinking his teeth into the flesh of his neck. Chrollo’s will to fight waned as Chameleon ran his tongue over the length of his jaw, hovering just an inch from his lips as he looked him in the eye and spoke, “I’m gonna have fun ruining you.”

When he finished speaking, he shoved his freakishly long tongue into Chrollo’s mouth and down his throat, earning a pained whine from the hurt of his burns. Chameleon took his time like this, Chrollo struggling to breathe before Chameleon finally pulled off of his mouth and instead buried his face back into his neck. Chrollo let his body go limp, closing his eyes until Chameleon was just close enough. A burst of fight erupted in him, and he lunged at Chameleon, biting down as hard as possible, feeling the soft flesh over his shoulder pierced by his teeth.

Chameleon screeched in pain, attempting to pull away though Chrollo wouldn’t let him go until Chameleon forcefully ripped him off, taking flesh and skin with him.

Chameleon stumbled back with a pained howl, gripping the wound for a moment while he recovered, “Fuck! You fucking **bitch!** That hurt!”

Chrollo bared his teeth, snarling at him more like an animal than a man. His mouth hurt too much to speak, so he let his eyes spit venomous hatred at Chameleon.

Chameleon rounded on him, shaking in fury, “You’ll pay for that you bitch!”

Chrollo spat at him as Chameleon savagely beat him in a rage. Chameleon dropped back off of him after a moment, watching the blood pour from a cut on his eyebrow.

Chameleon stepped back, still furious, he pulled out another vial, eyes darkened with anger. He roughly stabbed the needle into him, watching with sick joy as Chrollo struggled for a moment longer before he broke into a cold sweat and succumbed to the overdose of ketamine in his system.

Chameleon yanked him up by his hair, earning a distressed groan from Chrollo, “I’m gonna make you pay for that.”

Chameleon kept that burning grip in his hair, bringing him to his knees and making him face Kurapika. Chameleon held him by his throat while Chrollo began gasping for breath, feeling cold and dizzy, his vision blurring.

Kurapika struggling against the chains and ropes, “Leave him alone!”

Chameleon snapped the button off Chrollo’s pants, slipping his hand down, eyes never leaving Kurapika, “Watch. I want you to watch. To see everything I’m gonna do to this savage animal.”

Kurapika dropped his head for a moment before releasing an agonized whine while Chameleon continued to force himself on Chrollo, his hand working roughly and exposing him while he bit him hard repeatedly.

Chrollo’s mind faltered, he was almost grateful for the way it faded in and out, hardly registering what was being done to him. More than anything, Chrollo found relief in the fact that he was losing feeling entirely. Instead, he just felt cold and heavy. His wounds fading into the darkness and bringing the pain with them.

 

He knew he was dying. And in that moment, there was only one more thing he cared to do.

 

Summoning all the strength left in his body, he took one long, final look into Kurapika’s eyes, letting the image of that gorgeous scarlet color burn into his mind. The last thing Chrollo felt was his heart breaking at the pain he saw in those eyes, wishing he could take that pain with him when he went, but knowing it was only about to get worse.


	23. Avenger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy am I sorry for the long update period! I got a bit burned out so this update is a bite sized one as I try to work through the slump and keep the fic moving.
> 
>  
> 
> Trigger warnings for;
> 
> Bodily harm, acid burns, and death

  

 

Kurapika’s head dropped, a sob threatening to rise in his chest for his own helplessness. There was nothing he could do, not a thing, as Chrollo finally succumbed to the drugs and his injuries.

After a moment of catching his breath in the midst of his distress, Kurapika lifted his head, “Are you really going to kill him? Now? Already?”

His voice cracked painfully, and Chameleon paused his assault on Chrollo to chuckle, “Normally I’d take my time. But this one,” he nipped at Chrollo’s skin, “Isn’t someone I have that luxury with. If I let this go too long, he’s liable to find an opening and make himself a real pain. So, I have to settle for cutting my enjoyment with him short. But I’ll manage, I’ve got you after all. And I can keep you as long as I want.”

Kurapika trembled in a mix of fear and an indescribable, insatiable rage. The last time he’d felt such an incredible force tear through his heart was the moment he’d returned to Lusko to identify the remains of his clan. Their bodies had been laid out in preparation for mass burial, there weren’t even enough blankets and towels to properly cover them. Men, women, children, strung out with the grisly wounds where their eyes once were, gaping forever. It was a sight Kurapika could never forget, but with time, the pain faded into nothing but a memory.

 

Now, it burned him from inside with all of its original vigor.

 

Kurapika could feel his mind split, it was a physical pain and a heaviness that drowned his senses but for a sharp and pure ringing in his ears. Kurapika lost all temporal sense, all he felt was cold. But this feeling was unique, it wasn’t a chill or the kind he’d felt when jumping into a river. It was the sensation he got when he’d burned his hand so badly that it didn’t feel hot, but instead felt cold. So utterly cold.

For the first time in months, Kurapika felt a familiar sensation begin to pulse through his veins. His heart raced painfully in his chest as he realized, his aura was flowing again.

 

_This is my chance… I have a chance. I can fight!_

Kurapika allowed his body to go limp in his restraints, his mind growing eerily silent as he pooled his aura to the crucial chakra points in his temples and his palms, focusing and storing the hot energy until he felt sick to his stomach from the overwhelming power of it.

 

And when he opened his eyes and met Chameleon’s, he knew. This was murderous intent. Pure, murderous rage. The most righteous anger he’d ever felt.

 

Chameleon caught his breath, his eyes widening in fear as he released his hold on Chrollo a heartbeat before Kurapika let his aura flare. A single, powerful surge forward snapped the ropes and pulled the chains from the wall. Chameleon gasped in shock, but he didn’t have time to react as Kurapika’s hand closed over his throat and crushed in with a feral growl.

In a panic, Chameleon kicked him off, but Kurapika’s Nen materialized more surely than it ever had before, and he shot a chain clean through Chameleon’s arm, earning an agonized screech from the panicked man.

Chameleon lurched back, pulling himself free of the chain before rounding on Kurapika and landing a blow to his face. Kurapika hardly blinked as rage drove his movements. Chameleon tried to slip away, but Kurapika was faster, landing a crushing strike to his rib cage, shattering it.

Howling in pain, Chameleon grabbed something as Kurapika yanked him back towards him. Twisting like a snake, Chameleon splashed a fluid into Kurapika’s eyes, and the burn told him instantly what it was.

Kurapika screeched in agony, but despite the pain, his fury drove him and he knew even without his eyes, his Nen wouldn’t be affected. The genes that were responsible for his eyes and for his Nen were pleiotropic, controlling multiple physical traits in a single allele. Meaning, he didn’t need his scarlet eyes to kill this man, and therefore, he couldn’t care less about the acid burning them.

Kurapika couldn’t see, but he caught Chameleon before throwing him and slamming him to the ground with enough strength to shatter the concrete beneath him.

Chameleon wailed in pain, “Please! Don’t-”

He was cut short as Kurapika closed his hands over his throat, crushing it completely. He could’ve ended it in an instant by piercing his heart, but this was personal. This was angry. He wanted to feel the life leave Chameleon’s body, and he was willing to tolerate the burning on his face and in his eyes in order to do this with his own hands.

Chameleon struggled desperately beneath Kurapika’s immense grip, but Kurapika held him there. He could feel his hands grow wet as Chameleon foamed at his mouth while he choked. As Kurapika dominated him, he could feel the very moment that Chameleon’s neck snapped under his grip. But Chameleon’s death wasn’t quick. Kurapika’s fingers had crushed the bones, but they didn’t sever his spinal cord, so he felt every agonizing moment.

 

And that made Kurapika fiercely pleased.

 

It made him so pleased, that for a moment he was frightened with himself. The pleasure was almost sexual, it made him feel hot and excited to have Chameleon dying to his hands after everything he’d done.

It took a long time, longer than Kurapika expected, for Chameleon to fall still beneath him. Even once he was sure Chameleon was dead, Kurapika couldn’t pry his hands off his throat. He’d gripped Chameleon so tightly that his fingers had locked in that position, and he had to forcibly pull himself away, his nails ripping skin away as he did.

Kurapika was gasping, his eyes burning terribly. His whole body trembled violently from head to toe, and for a moment he feared he was succumbing to a seizure. When his head cleared enough, he stumbled over to where he could feel Chrollo’s faint presence still lingering, neglecting his eyes as he ran his hands over Chrollo’s limp body until he found the right side of his neck, just beneath his jaw.

Kurapika steadied himself, focusing on feeling for a pulse, but he felt nothing at first. Chrollo’s body was still warm, and as he held his fingers there longer, he finally felt the faintest pulse beneath their tips.

Conjuring his Holy Chain, he quickly began pouring his aura over Chrollo’s body. Faintly, he was aware that the longer he stay beside Chrollo, the less chance his eyes would have of ever healing. But in that moment, Kurapika didn’t spare a second thought about the agonizing pain. Tears poured down his face as his body tried desperately to clear the acid away, but it was in vain.

The pain was disorienting, but Kurapika forced himself to continue healing Chrollo. He found himself once more being the gatekeeper between death and his lover, and he found once again that he wasn’t willing to let Chrollo be whisked away from him.

Kurapika forced himself through the pounding, burning pain, but he knew even if he could heal the atrocious physical wounds that marred his body, he wouldn’t be able to do anything about the overdose of drugs in his blood. The best he could do was keep his heart beating, stop the bleeding, and wait for the drugs to start clearing his system. But Kurapika wasn’t sure how long he could hold on through the pain. Determination drove him as he continued to heal Chrollo, keeping his fingers over his carotid artery, but Chrollo’s pulse didn’t grow any stronger due to the hypotension caused by the powerful tranquilizers.

Kurapika kept his eyes shut tightly as he picked Chrollo’s arm up, running his thumb over the skin and feeling for a heat source by his wrist. He thought for a moment, it was a long shot, but there was a chance he could use his dowsing chain in reverse, drawing the target matter towards the chain rather than moving the chain towards the matter.

 

It was a long shot, but it was the only thing he could think of.

 

Drawing Chrollo’s wrist to his mouth, Kurapika took a section of skin between his teeth and bit down hard until he could taste a small trickle of blood on his tongue. He could feel Chrollo’s wrist twitch in his teeth as he did. Hovering his Dowsing chain close to the small wound, Kurapika muttered the condition to himself and pushed his aura around him until it enveloped the two of them.

Kurapika split his attention between the pain, his healing Holy Chain, and his Dowsing Chain. Fatigue washed over him immediately, and his body began to tremble again. He kept his mind shut down, not willing to confront the almost ecstatic pleasure that still left a warmth lingering in his gut after killing Chameleon.

He kept his jaw clamped tightly in order to keep his aura flowing steadily. Still holding Chrollo’s wrist in his free hand, Kurapika could feel warm fluid running from the wound. He figured it could be blood, but the bite wound was too small to produce that much, and hope fluttered alive in his chest that his idea was working.

 

A spasm from Chrollo’s body filled Kurapika with energy. Touching his free hand to the right of his neck again, Kurapika could clearly feel his pulse now.

 

Chrollo coughed, Kurapika couldn’t see, but he assumed he was convulsing. Kurapika tried to steady him as he spasmed, not speaking for fear of losing concentration while his wounds still needed healing and the drugs still needed to be cleared from his system.

 

Chrollo hacked a couple times before jerking pointedly as if he was waking up, his voice too raspy to be coherent.

Kurapika leaned over him, aware of the tears that still fell, desperately trying to clear the acid, “Chrollo? Are you awake?”

Chrollo groaned, breaking off in another fit and still unable to answer.

Kurapika ran his hand over Chrollo’s skin, the wounds were healing quickly, “Okay… Just… Just hang on.”

Chrollo murmured pointedly, Kurapika accepted that as confirmation.

Kurapika continued healing him for a while before Chrollo stirred again, “Cha-”

He broke off with a cough, but Kurapika knew what he was trying to say, “He’s dead. Don’t worry.”

Chrollo suppressed his fit, “We need… to go.”

Kurapika steadied him, “You need to hold still.”

Chrollo shuddered, “What’s wrong?”

Kurapika pressed a bit more firmly, still wary of his broken bones, “You’re still hurt, be careful.”

Chrollo grumbled to himself for a moment, “No…”

Kurapika stroked his chest gently, “No?”

Chrollo shifted his weight a tad, “Are you hurt? You’re hurt…”

Kurapika just grunted his reply.

He felt Chrollo’s hand weakly brush his, “You’re crying. No, not crying…”

Kurapika wished he could look Chrollo in the eye, but he couldn’t, “I’m fine. You’re the one who’s hurt.”

Chrollo squeezed his hand more tightly, “What did he do to your eyes?”

Kurapika was quiet for a long moment, “I’m fine.”

Chrollo’s hand brushed his soaked cheek, wiping the tears away before he let out a slight grunt, “Oh, God… It… burns.”

Kurapika brushed him off, aware that the pain was subsiding as the acid deadened his nerves, “You need to hold still.”

For a moment, it seemed like Chrollo would obey him, but then he felt Chrollo’s weight shift as he sat up.

Kurapika put out his arm to stop him, but Chrollo had enough strength to shoo him away. Chrollo’s hands landed on Kurapika’s shoulders and he leaned him back, “Hold still. I’m going to wash your eyes out.”

Kurapika protested, but the moment he was leaned back, his head began to swim leaving him totally disoriented, “Stop… I-”

Chrollo rested his hand on him for a moment before he stood to find a water bottle. He cradled Kurapika’s head carefully as he let the water run over his face before delicately held Kurapika’s eyes open beneath the slow stream of water.

The pain was excruciating, and Chrollo let slip a small gasp at what he saw, but Kurapika was quickly succumbing to his fatigue. Kurapika’s head spun as Chrollo stopped pouring the water over him, a trail of heat followed in the wake, and Kurapika guessed it was blood running down his cheeks now.

Kurapika feebly brought his hands up over Chrollo’s as they rested on his chest, “Please…” pain seared him intensely, fear and distress mounting him and threatening to boil over if not for his fleeting consciousness, “Help me.”

Chrollo leaned close to him, his voice soft and laced with concern but steady, “I will. Trust me.”


End file.
